"Albuquerque"
“Way back when I was just a little bitty boy…” The good Father Daniels was in the middle of his usual Sunday morning sermon, relating some relevant parable to his flock by using his own life as an example. Unfortunately, at least one of his parishioners wasn’t paying him any mind.
“And my dear, sweet mother, she just looked at my like a cow looks at an oncoming train and she leaned right down next to me and she said ‘IT'S GOOD FOR YOU’…”
No, Laine Anderson wasn’t focused on anything going on inside the austere Episcopal cathedral. Her thoughts were elsewhere entirely. She was thinking about Anrai MacEibhir and the fact that she hadn’t seen him in nearly a week. The last time they’d been together was at a wedding for a friend and oh how that had gotten both her heart and her mind going. It didn’t help any that it was now June, the favored month for exchanging vows and wearing white gowns. There was nothing like being newly in love to make weddings seem like magical wonderful events. Something to long for.
“Well, let me tell you, people, it wasn't long at all before my dream came true…” Father Daniels was about to make some crucial, salient point and his tone of voice (and increased volume from the pulpit) were enough to get Laine’s attention for the moment.
“…guess the number of molecules in Leonard Nimoy's butt-“ Mathew Collins, the nineteen year old jackass that worked part-time on the ranch was taunting his younger brother, making him snicker and guffaw. Laine may have cracked a smile herself before sobering and turning to give the boy a lethal glare.
“I was off by three” He gave her a wide-eyed look of innocence that caused her to turn back around and study her hymnbook. Sweet Jesus that boy was rotten. And funny as all get out.
***
After the service there was a picnic lunch going on. Potluck. Laine had brought a crockpot full of sauerkraut and beef franks, something that reflected the typical German heritage of many of the residents in the area. Young children curled their lips at it, adults dug in.
Laine found herself thinking about things with a definite Spanish flare instead.
Albuquerque.
Albuquerque.
Taos.
Taos.
She corrected herself more than once. Anrai lived about eighty miles or so outside of Albuquerque. She knew because she’d spent an embarrassing amount of time staring at a MapQuest image of the area, trying to picture where he may have been specifically. Googled how many miles it was between her house and his. Divided out how many hours one would have to drive to get there from here. Figured how many tanks of gas that would be. How many times she could listen to what she considered ‘their’ playlist on her iPod in that timeframe.
You know, I'd never been on a real airplane before, she thought to herself, the only sort she’d had any experience with were the coin operated ones outside the grocery store when she and Wes were kids. That hardly counted as being a seasoned flier. Hell, she had never been beyond the borders of her state of residency. Never had reason to-until now. Anrai had made the trip to Flint Creek more than a dozen times to see her since his initial stay, albeit that first time didn’t count: he was merely an employee then.
Still, it was long past time Laine return the favor…
***
“Except that I had to sit between two large Albanian women with excruciatingly severe body odor and the little kid in back of me kept throwin' up the whole time The flight attendants ran out of Dr. Pepper and salted peanuts And the in-flight movie was Bio-Dome with Pauly Shore…” Laine stood at the Hertz counter in the Albuquerque International Sunport Airport, talking on the phone to her best friend, Margene, recounting the overly dramatic tale of her first flight. The plane was only the first leg of her journey. She had a good two hour drive ahead of her, not just due to her unfamiliarity with the area and the distance, but because she had every intention of stopping along the way to freshen up after being stuck in the cabin from Hell.
“And, oh yeah, three of the airplane engines burned out and we went into a tailspin and crashed into a hillside and the plane exploded in a giant fireball and everybody died. Except for me. You know why?” She winked at the guy behind her in the line. He was giving her an amused look that almost matched the timbre of Margene’s laughter on the other end of the phonecall.
“'Cause I had my tray table up
And my seat back in the full upright position…”
Ah ha ha ha…Ah ha ha…Ahhhh. Even Laine had to laugh at her outrageous nonsense now. But Lord, could the gal at the counter move any slower? At least she was entertaining everyone in the immediate area as well as a disgruntled Margene who was less than thrilled to find out about Laine’s travel plans after she had already left for the airport.
“
So I crawled from the twisted, burnin' wreckage, I crawled on my hands and knees for three full days-I know I just left this mornin’. It’s called dramatic license, just go with it, Margie.” She rolled her eyes before continuing,
“Draggin' along my big leather suitcase and my garment bag and my tenor saxophone and my twelve-pound bowling ball and my lucky, lucky autographed glow-in-the-dark snorkel-Lord, hush up. I’m tellin’ a story here. I could have brought a bowlin’ ball with me, you don’t know.
“Fiiiiiiiiine…” She sighed and then chuckled again. “Never mind, it’s my turn to see if I can get all communicado with the locals here and rent a car. Truck. God, I hope they have a pick-up truck cause I don’t want to drive some little roller-skate compact car.”
***
She got her pick-up truck, a nice new model that had her thinking about trading in her old one back home as she played with the cruise control options and the GPS system. This thing could be fun. On the seat next to her was a map, her own hand scrawled directions to Anrai’s little town once she got off the highway and her sunglasses. Her bag was in the back seat of the extended cab. Yeah, the truck was nice and maybe worth the impromptu vacation all on it’s own. The hell it was-she wanted to see that damned fool of hers.
She was grinning at the thought of him as she pulled into the Albuquerque Holiday Inn.
“Where the towels are oh so fluffy and you can eat your soup right out of the ashtrays if you wanna. It's OK, they're clean.” She read the sign on the large lobby windows and shook her head. That was one helluva slogan. Marketing nightmare, probably.
She checked into a room, turned on the A/C (maybe ate the mint that was on the pillow) and kicked off her shoes. She wasn’t going to be there long. She only wanted to shower and change her clothes. Maybe actually put on some make up and do something to tame her hair. The heat here was likely going to kill her. She wondered how Anrai could stand it, let alone to actually spend the days working hard on a horse ranch. As she undressed and started the shower, Laine gave her phone an annoyed look. Damned thing, always ringing. There better not be a problem back at Flint Creek…she didn’t recognize the number.
Well now, who could that be?
"Who is it?"
No answer
"Who is it?"
There's no answer.
"WHO IS IT?"
They're not sayin' anything.
“Well, screw you, jackass.” She finally hissed at whoever was on the other end and hung up. She wasn’t going to play games when she had things to do. She frowned, the phone must not have hung up because it was now making that familiar tonal sequence from the bed where she’d tossed it.
And twenty seconds later, [she] heard a familiar voice And you know what it said? I'll tell you what it said. It said :
"If you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again"
"If you need help, hang up and then dial your operator"
"If you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again"
"If you need help, hang up and then dial your operator"
In Albuquerque.
***
After finally resorting to shutting the phone off, Laine did manage to take that shower. She changed into a fresh pair of jeans and then after some consideration, changed again. It was hot. That was her justification for putting on the lightweight cotton skirt and opting to button her jean jacket over her bra, or at least fasten the three buttons in the middle. She liked the look. It was casual and flirty. Alright, maybe sexy seeing as she was showing off a fair amount of cleavage. Margene would approve. Drying her hair and some lipstick later and she was ready to check out again and get on the road.
She had only just pulled onto the 25 North when she realized she was hungry and needed to eat something. She didn’t want to show up to Anrai’s feeling like a starving, crazed weasel. Spotting the first opportunity for food, she took the next exit. She decided to buy some donuts. She’d take the box with her; Anrai did have a sweet tooth after all and would surely finish off whatever she hadn’t eaten.
[She] drove over to the donut shop…walked on up to the guy behind the counter and he says "Yeah, what do ya want?"
"You got any glazed donuts?"
He said "No, we're outta glazed donuts"
"Well, you got any jelly donuts?"
He said "No, we're outta jelly donuts"
"You got any Bavarian cream-filled donuts?"
He said "No, we're outta Bavarian cream-filled donuts"
"You got any cinnamon rolls?"
He said "No, we're outta cinnamon rolls"
"You got any apple fritters?"
He said "No, we're outta apple fritters"
"You got any bear claws?"
He said "Wait a minute, I'll go check…No, we're outta bear claws"
"Well, in that case - in that case, what do you have?"
He says "All I got right now is this box of one dozen--"
"OK, I'll take that"
Frosted cake donuts with rainbow jimmies on them. Definitely not her taste in baked goods, but she was hungry and she could eat while she drove with a minimum of mess. Until she ended up with jimmies in her bra and crumbs in her lap, that is. Half-eaten donut found itself tossed out the window and her aggravation killed her appetite. So much for being sexy.
She had a good sixty mile ahead of her at that point and decided to see what sort of local radio stations there were. Tejano, lots of Tejano music. And Mariachi. She amused herself with the upbeat, joyful noise for a while then changed stations again. Country…
I said "Woah, hold on now, baby I'm just not ready for that kinda commitment"
So we broke up and I never saw her again But that's just the way things go…
Laine changed the channel as quickly as she could. Country music was all the same depressing, misery set to steel guitar and a badly tuned six-string as far as she was concerned. She wanted some classic rock. Even the top forty would be alright a this point.
***
The 25 north to the 84 East and then the 68…exit Paseo De Pueblo Norte…Laine made better time than she thought and she had to snort as she found herself on the Enchanted Circle Scenic Byway. This stretch of road would eventually turn into the 64 East, but right now? The name seemed oddly appropriate as the path to her lover.
She pulled over to the wide shoulder and took out her cell phone, picked a few jimmies out of her bra and dialed Anrai’s number. “Hi, Sugar. What are ya doin’?” Laine smiled at the sound of his voice, the lilt of his accent. God, it was a beautiful voice. “Me? Oh, I’m just out for a test drive. Thinkin’ about getting’ a new truck…”
She listened to him make small talk for a few minutes before the sheer rotten streak in her demanded to be turned loose. “Say, darlin’, are ya gonna be home for a while? Oh…you’re not home…home…where are ya?”
Oh, she had to laugh. Of all the timing in the world…
She ducked as the dark green Jeep passed her on the stretch of road; she didn’t want him to see her until she well able to pull back onto the road behind him at a distance. Staying back was hard for her, natural lead foot that she possessed. Still she managed to keep her laughter to a minimum as she tailed him. It couldn’t take him too long before he realized he was being followed, Anrai was nothing if not observant.
“Anyway, um, um, where was I? Kinda lost my train of thought…Uh, well, uh, OK
Anyway I, I know it's kinda been a roundabout way of saying it…But I guess the whole point I'm tryin' to make here is…” She was babbling nonsense as she tried not to laugh, to get close enough to be identified or too far back to be unable to follow him back to his house. Lord, she was the damned fool for once.
“I hate sauerkraut---
”That's all I'm really tryin' to say…what? I was tellin’ you about church this mornin’…the potluck?
And, by the way, if one day you happen to wake up And find yourself in an existential quandary…Full of loathing and self-doubt And wracked with the pain and isolation of your pitiful meaningless existence At least you can take a small bit of comfort in knowing that Somewhere out there in this crazy mixed-up universe of ours…” Maybe she had been listening to Father Daniels after all…
”There's still a little place called…Jesus, how many roads can you name Paseo de What the hell ever?” Ah, the jig was up. She couldn’t help asking the question as she passed the umpteenth road sign bearing what seemed like the same exact name to her. “What do you mean, ‘where am I, darlin’?”
She tried to stall but he’d slowed down and she was fast approaching his Jeep. Hanging up her phone she simply waved and followed his lead, turning off the engine right there in the middle of the road. There wasn’t any other traffic and once he’d opened his door and stepped out onto the blacktopped pavement she was grinning bright as day. It took a lot of effort to stay sitting in the truck until he pulled the door open for her, then she looked him right in the eye and offered a casual,
“Albuquerque. A L B U-“
She was interrupted by his laughter and then a kiss as he cupped her face between his hands. When he finally pulled back enough to let her speak, she finished,
“querque".
Laine Anderson//Flint Creek//2555