The cheerleader said to the football player: "Who is that freak with the tuba?"
The football player said to the cheerleader: "That's a bando. Let's beat them up"
The cheerleader says to the football player: "Okay."

Brian: What happened to your friends?
Meg: My family scared them away.

So my mom is gonna need knee surgery, she has a shredded miniscus.Boo. Which means that I'll have to learn how to be a competent driver before the 15th of august and have my liscense so i can get myself to school and stuff. That sucks

So time for an update that doesn't consist of a jingle or a quote, at least that's what I figured. So I really need to get a job, the bank of M-O-M has dried up. And without money I can't get offensive Republican shirts to wear in France. Or go to France for that matter, or move out, or get a car, etc. Whatever happened to bartering, "I'll give you ( Read more... )

HEY TONY! i like the things you do! HEY TONY! IF i could i would be you. youre the one and only tiger, with the one and only taste, you know how to take a breakfast and make it GRRRREEEEEEEEEAAAATTTTTTTT!!!! Frosted Flakes, theyre more than good THEY'RE GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Best friends are the people that know all about and still put up with you!

"Yes, of course liberalism is a mental defect. Liberals are wracked by self-loathing as the result of some traumatic incident -- say, driving drunk off a bridge with your mistress passed out in the back seat and letting the poor girl drown because you're a married man and a U.S. senator, just to take one utterly random, hypothetical example off the ( Read more... )

"The new Spanish government will soon meet with Germany and France to craft a 'European' approach to terrorism. Topic No. 1: How big should the white flag be? Oak or cedar for the pole?" --James Lileks

Lame, I'm only actually in 1 class, but I'm hella high on the waiting lists for speech 1 and, you guessed it, German 1. All the damn english classes i needed were full, do thats waiting till next semester. I'm in brass ensemble, even I couldnt escape band in college, damn me. Im takin german(hopefully) instead of french so i wouldnt sour the ( Read more... )

If you don't give your heart wings you'll never fly.