Unexpected Destinies Chapter 102
Title: Unexpected Destinies
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: up to and including Exile on Main St., AU from the end of season 5
Warnings: AU, slash
Word Count: 2,535
Summary: Dean and his archangels discuss his meeting with Crowley.
PAST
"You have worked with this demon before?" Raphael inquired, face scrunched up like he'd smelled something foul.
"Yeah, back before you guys saw the light," Dean replied, leaning back in his chair and sipping the water he'd gotten to soothe his throat. "He knew that should Lucifer win the Apocalypse that your brother would turn on them as soon as he was finished with us."
"Perceptive," Michael commented. "Do you trust him?"
"No, of course not!"
"Good."
Dean snorted. "I'm not an idiot, Mike, nothing could make me trust a demon. Hell, just ask Cas about how long it took me to start trusting him."
"Long," Castiel stated dryly.
"Even though he was an angel?" Michael asked.
"Even though he was an angel," Dean agreed, shooting his lover a look to show he didn't find Castiel's remark nearly as funny as his angel seemed to think it was. "I basically don't trust anything supernatural without a damn good reason. Cas earned that trust and so have you guys."
"It is an honor we take seriously," Raphael declared.
Dean caught the archangel's eyes and held his gaze for a moment before nodding. He'd never in his life have expected to, but he knew that he now trusted Raphael even if he still wasn't sure how else he felt about the archangel. He definitely wouldn't call them friends, but he was no longer sure that it would never happen. And if anyone had ever told him that he'd come to see Raphael this way in the past, he'd have laughed in their face before cold cocking them. Then again if anyone had ever told him that he'd voluntarily stay away from Sam, he'd never have believed them either and yet here he was nearly a year after he and his brother's last true time together- or at least the last time that they'd both been aware that they were together- and he was as much to blame for that separation as Sam.
It was something that Dean had spent quite a bit of time on lately as the one year anniversary of what they'd originally thought was the end of the Apocalypse (and that which Sam still believed to be exactly that) drew near. Yes, it was his brother who had commenced their extended separation by not coming to find him as soon as Sam was resurrected, but he was the one who had kept it going by not running to his brother as soon as he'd learned that Sam was still alive. Okay, no, by not staying with his brother once he'd had Castiel bring him to Sam. He could admit to himself that he had gone running to Sam as soon as he'd learned that his baby brother was alive once more and that seemed so strange now.
The revelation that he didn't need Sam as much as he'd always thought that he did had kept Dean up more than one night as of late and had sent him rushing to the toilet when he'd first made it. His first instinct had been to deny the revelation and figure out what the hell was wrong with him for being such a bad brother and he knew that he'd worried Castiel with his violent reaction but his lover had seemed to be able to tell that this was something he wasn't ready to share just yet. Instead of pushing, Castiel had relieved him of his adverse physical symptoms and had then held him close, providing a sense of comfort and security as he finally started to come to terms with how his feelings for, and opinions about, Sam had changed over the course of the past year. In typical Winchester fashion he'd been ignoring all of that as best he could and thus it had been quite a shock to find how drastically they had changed.
He was forced to swallow an unamused laugh at the thought. No matter how dramatic a change in some ways, Dean knew that Sam would say that the way in which he'd ignored it while it was happening was him to a tee and his brother would be right. So in some ways he'd changed tremendously and in others he was still exactly the same. It was comforting, that latter as it let him know that he hadn't lost himself somewhere along the way, not that he believed either Castiel or Michael would allow him to do so, but it helped him to deal with it and accept things for what they now were.
So Sam didn't mean as much to him anymore as his brother used to and Dean found that he was surprisingly okay with that. Oh he still loved the little bitch and he knew that he always would, but he no longer needed him around in order to be able to feel happy or like he was worth something. It wasn't an easy realization to come to terms with but the fact remained that he was only now figuring out he now felt like this. The actual hard thing, the changing of his feelings, had already occurred even if he'd not consciously accepted it at the time.
"Dean?" Castiel questioned.
"Huh?" Dean replied, blinking. He looked up to find his lover crouched beside him with a frown on his face. "Sorry, I was a million miles away. Did you say something?"
Castiel's frown remained as his angel looked at him and Dean realized that he'd left things too long. In the past he'd never have shared his thoughts and fears with anyone else, not even his brother and father, but now he had someone who was paying enough attention to him to really notice how distracted he'd been as of late and to see how much this was affecting him and it wasn't fair to Castiel to keep him in the dark.
"Dean-" Castiel began, reaching out to touch him.
"I was thinking about Sam," Dean stated.
His lover frowned but seemed to accept it before concern filled Castiel's face when his lover's fingers touched him. "You're unwell. What happened?"
"Huh? What?"
Dean's confusion cleared when his angel's hand moved from his face to his stomach and he remembered being sick earlier. He'd kind of forgotten about it between explaining to Castiel why he needed a lift back to the Impala and then again to Michael and Raphael when his lover had called them over. He smiled in gratitude as the burn at the back of his throat from vomiting faded with a brush of Castiel's fingers.
"I'm fine, it was just a one-off thing," Dean explained.
"What happened?" Michael repeated Castiel's question, stepping closer.
"I didn't react very well to Crowley taking me for a ride," he laughed once. "And I used to think Angel Air was bad, turns out that it's got nothing on demonic teleportation."
"You reacted adversely to being transported by the demon?" Raphael questioned.
"Yes," Castiel confirmed for him. "He was physically ill."
"What, isn't that normal?" Dean asked at the thoughtful look on the healer's face.
"No, most humans will experience only a mild discomfort if they feel anything at all," Raphael explained. "Since demons are unable to heal their human hosts, they require a method of teleportation that is not harmful to the body they are possessing or they would need to find a new one every time they transported like that."
"Oh. So why was I sick?"
"That is probably my fault," Michael stated.
"It is the most likely explanation," Raphael agreed. "From the moment that you first allowed Michael inside of you, you were no longer merely a potential vessel but someone who has been in direct contact with angelic Grace and no human isn't marked by that in some way."
"And angelic Grace does not react well to demonic essence or power," Michael added.
"Ya think?" Dean retorted, trying to decide how he felt about that. It wasn't all that long ago that he'd have had a freak out about what Raphael was implying, but now he found that it didn't bother him so much which probably had something to do with the fact that he wouldn't give up being able to see and touch his angels' wings for anything and that was another side effect of having let Michael in. "So, wait, wouldn't this already have been the case from when Cas resurrected me? I mean he touched me with his true form while doing that."
"Your soul," Raphael replied. "Castiel touched your soul with his Grace then, not your body. Though he healed it the type of interaction required for that and with the taking of a vessel is vastly different."
"Okay, so is this something permanent? I mean will it always feel like that if a demon nabs me or is it only for a certain amount of time after Mike pops in for a visit?"
"It is not something that will fade."
"Nor is the fact that touching you affected him," Michael added.
"You mean the burning?"
"Yes and this could be due as much to my influence as Castiel's."
"Really?"
"Yes, at least if he touched you somewhere that you might have had traces of Castiel's oil."
"Oh."
The words made Dean look over at his lover and he found Castiel looking back at him with a self-satisfied smirk. The look sent a spark of annoyance through him and a wave of desire so he scowled at his angel. It wasn't fair that Castiel was able to mark him so easily and, to the supernatural, so obviously and he couldn't do the same in return. Even his physical marks only lasted for as long as Castiel remembered not to let himself heal which his angel had to consciously prevent himself from doing. Heck, Crowley hadn't even needed to touch him to know that they were together, the demon could smell Castiel on him no doubt due to the wing oil.
It wasn't fair.
The touch of feathers to the side of his face made Dean smile before he swatted the wing away. "Behave," he admonished playfully.
"I don't understand," Castiel tried.
Dean growled as he felt a wing brush his back and then shivered as some of the feather ran along the bare skin of his arm as he'd taken his flannel off with his jacket upon returning home. "Castiel."
"Yes?"
"Don't tease."
"Who says Castiel is teasing?" Raphael asked.
The words didn't immediately register but when they did, Dean squawked and then sputtered when Castiel was suddenly behind him and there were arms around him. His eyes were wide and filled with disbelief as they darted from Michael to Raphael while he was pulled against the back of his chair before his lover's hands slipped lower. The worst thing was that he was responding, the familiar touches inflaming him very easily.
"But... I..." Dean began before focusing on Michael. "I thought you weren't thrilled about this."
"Back when I was not sure of your intentions," Michael replied.
"Dean?" Castiel inquired, his hands stilling before he moved around so his angel could see his face. "You have never cared if there were others present before."
It was true, Dean had gone quite far with an audience before and might even have gone further if it hadn't been for extenuating circumstances, but that was different. It also wasn't like he had anything against exhibitionism either as it could be hot, both for those viewing and those performing, but he did draw the line at family. Which would normally have included Sam except that he'd always known that his brother would run out the moment it became clear that he wasn't going to stop. Michael and Raphael, however, he was pretty sure would actually stay around and watch if they started anything now.
"They're your brothers," Dean said.
"And Sam is- ah, yes, I believe I see," Castiel replied and he was pretty sure that his lover did get it.
"But you didn't tell the demon no to his offer despite not trusting him," Michael stated after a moment and Dean sent him a grateful look.
"I thought it best not to burn any bridges so long as we don't have a concrete plan," Dean explained.
"Crowley has also proven himself to be resourceful before," Castiel agreed. "Though the moment it is in his best interest to betray us, he will."
"I know, but that won't happen so long as Lucifer is free as I don't think the devil will ever forgive Crowley."
"He will not," Raphael confirmed. "What did you tell the demon?"
"Just that the cage didn't hold, I purposefully didn't mention yourself or Mike, nor did I let him know that Cas has been restored and promoted. He does however know about us," Dean continued, looking at his lover.
"He would have been able to smell it," Castiel said before tilting his head and observing him. "You were hoping he could create another diversion for Lucifer to focus on."
"Do you think he could stir up a rebellion among the demons?"
"It would be difficult as many of them see Lucifer as their creator and father," Michael responded. "However it might be possible just like it was among us and that would serve my brother right after what he did."
"Well I've got his number and he's got mine, so we'll see what comes of it. He can't get in here, right?"
"No, we've fully warded the place so even if the salt lines were to be broken he would still not be able to enter."
"Good."
"If there is nothing else, then I have something to show you, Michael," Raphael stated.
"I've got nothing else," Dean said.
"Me neither," Castiel added.
When the other two archangels had left, Dean turned his attention to his own archangel, hoping to continue what Castiel had started now that they were alone but instead he found himself pulled to his feet and led towards the couch. Crap, he'd forgotten that he'd admitted to thinking about Sam earlier when he'd gotten lost in his thoughts and he knew better than to think that Castiel would let him get away with only opening up partially. His lover had already been very patient with him the past few days and he owed him an explanation.
With a sigh, Dean shifted so he was lying down on the couch instead of sitting on it and he rested his head in Castiel's lap before tugging one of his lover's inner wings closer so that he could groom it as he talked. Not only would that allow him to ground himself but it would be a tangible reminder of all that he'd gained since deciding to steer clear of Sam. Not to mention that it had the added benefit of allowing him to do something other than look at Castiel's eyes as he spoke and therefore have to see the emotions he couldn't deal with so easily there.
"I realized the other day that it's nearly a year since we confronted Michael and Lucifer at Stull Cemetery," Dean began, running his oil slick fingers through the soft feathers.
A.N.: For those of you who are interested, my Dean/Cas Big Bang fic will go up on Friday the 7th of October. That's the day my artist and I were randomly assigned.
Chapter 103
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: up to and including Exile on Main St., AU from the end of season 5
Warnings: AU, slash
Word Count: 2,535
Summary: Dean and his archangels discuss his meeting with Crowley.
PAST
"You have worked with this demon before?" Raphael inquired, face scrunched up like he'd smelled something foul.
"Yeah, back before you guys saw the light," Dean replied, leaning back in his chair and sipping the water he'd gotten to soothe his throat. "He knew that should Lucifer win the Apocalypse that your brother would turn on them as soon as he was finished with us."
"Perceptive," Michael commented. "Do you trust him?"
"No, of course not!"
"Good."
Dean snorted. "I'm not an idiot, Mike, nothing could make me trust a demon. Hell, just ask Cas about how long it took me to start trusting him."
"Long," Castiel stated dryly.
"Even though he was an angel?" Michael asked.
"Even though he was an angel," Dean agreed, shooting his lover a look to show he didn't find Castiel's remark nearly as funny as his angel seemed to think it was. "I basically don't trust anything supernatural without a damn good reason. Cas earned that trust and so have you guys."
"It is an honor we take seriously," Raphael declared.
Dean caught the archangel's eyes and held his gaze for a moment before nodding. He'd never in his life have expected to, but he knew that he now trusted Raphael even if he still wasn't sure how else he felt about the archangel. He definitely wouldn't call them friends, but he was no longer sure that it would never happen. And if anyone had ever told him that he'd come to see Raphael this way in the past, he'd have laughed in their face before cold cocking them. Then again if anyone had ever told him that he'd voluntarily stay away from Sam, he'd never have believed them either and yet here he was nearly a year after he and his brother's last true time together- or at least the last time that they'd both been aware that they were together- and he was as much to blame for that separation as Sam.
It was something that Dean had spent quite a bit of time on lately as the one year anniversary of what they'd originally thought was the end of the Apocalypse (and that which Sam still believed to be exactly that) drew near. Yes, it was his brother who had commenced their extended separation by not coming to find him as soon as Sam was resurrected, but he was the one who had kept it going by not running to his brother as soon as he'd learned that Sam was still alive. Okay, no, by not staying with his brother once he'd had Castiel bring him to Sam. He could admit to himself that he had gone running to Sam as soon as he'd learned that his baby brother was alive once more and that seemed so strange now.
The revelation that he didn't need Sam as much as he'd always thought that he did had kept Dean up more than one night as of late and had sent him rushing to the toilet when he'd first made it. His first instinct had been to deny the revelation and figure out what the hell was wrong with him for being such a bad brother and he knew that he'd worried Castiel with his violent reaction but his lover had seemed to be able to tell that this was something he wasn't ready to share just yet. Instead of pushing, Castiel had relieved him of his adverse physical symptoms and had then held him close, providing a sense of comfort and security as he finally started to come to terms with how his feelings for, and opinions about, Sam had changed over the course of the past year. In typical Winchester fashion he'd been ignoring all of that as best he could and thus it had been quite a shock to find how drastically they had changed.
He was forced to swallow an unamused laugh at the thought. No matter how dramatic a change in some ways, Dean knew that Sam would say that the way in which he'd ignored it while it was happening was him to a tee and his brother would be right. So in some ways he'd changed tremendously and in others he was still exactly the same. It was comforting, that latter as it let him know that he hadn't lost himself somewhere along the way, not that he believed either Castiel or Michael would allow him to do so, but it helped him to deal with it and accept things for what they now were.
So Sam didn't mean as much to him anymore as his brother used to and Dean found that he was surprisingly okay with that. Oh he still loved the little bitch and he knew that he always would, but he no longer needed him around in order to be able to feel happy or like he was worth something. It wasn't an easy realization to come to terms with but the fact remained that he was only now figuring out he now felt like this. The actual hard thing, the changing of his feelings, had already occurred even if he'd not consciously accepted it at the time.
"Dean?" Castiel questioned.
"Huh?" Dean replied, blinking. He looked up to find his lover crouched beside him with a frown on his face. "Sorry, I was a million miles away. Did you say something?"
Castiel's frown remained as his angel looked at him and Dean realized that he'd left things too long. In the past he'd never have shared his thoughts and fears with anyone else, not even his brother and father, but now he had someone who was paying enough attention to him to really notice how distracted he'd been as of late and to see how much this was affecting him and it wasn't fair to Castiel to keep him in the dark.
"Dean-" Castiel began, reaching out to touch him.
"I was thinking about Sam," Dean stated.
His lover frowned but seemed to accept it before concern filled Castiel's face when his lover's fingers touched him. "You're unwell. What happened?"
"Huh? What?"
Dean's confusion cleared when his angel's hand moved from his face to his stomach and he remembered being sick earlier. He'd kind of forgotten about it between explaining to Castiel why he needed a lift back to the Impala and then again to Michael and Raphael when his lover had called them over. He smiled in gratitude as the burn at the back of his throat from vomiting faded with a brush of Castiel's fingers.
"I'm fine, it was just a one-off thing," Dean explained.
"What happened?" Michael repeated Castiel's question, stepping closer.
"I didn't react very well to Crowley taking me for a ride," he laughed once. "And I used to think Angel Air was bad, turns out that it's got nothing on demonic teleportation."
"You reacted adversely to being transported by the demon?" Raphael questioned.
"Yes," Castiel confirmed for him. "He was physically ill."
"What, isn't that normal?" Dean asked at the thoughtful look on the healer's face.
"No, most humans will experience only a mild discomfort if they feel anything at all," Raphael explained. "Since demons are unable to heal their human hosts, they require a method of teleportation that is not harmful to the body they are possessing or they would need to find a new one every time they transported like that."
"Oh. So why was I sick?"
"That is probably my fault," Michael stated.
"It is the most likely explanation," Raphael agreed. "From the moment that you first allowed Michael inside of you, you were no longer merely a potential vessel but someone who has been in direct contact with angelic Grace and no human isn't marked by that in some way."
"And angelic Grace does not react well to demonic essence or power," Michael added.
"Ya think?" Dean retorted, trying to decide how he felt about that. It wasn't all that long ago that he'd have had a freak out about what Raphael was implying, but now he found that it didn't bother him so much which probably had something to do with the fact that he wouldn't give up being able to see and touch his angels' wings for anything and that was another side effect of having let Michael in. "So, wait, wouldn't this already have been the case from when Cas resurrected me? I mean he touched me with his true form while doing that."
"Your soul," Raphael replied. "Castiel touched your soul with his Grace then, not your body. Though he healed it the type of interaction required for that and with the taking of a vessel is vastly different."
"Okay, so is this something permanent? I mean will it always feel like that if a demon nabs me or is it only for a certain amount of time after Mike pops in for a visit?"
"It is not something that will fade."
"Nor is the fact that touching you affected him," Michael added.
"You mean the burning?"
"Yes and this could be due as much to my influence as Castiel's."
"Really?"
"Yes, at least if he touched you somewhere that you might have had traces of Castiel's oil."
"Oh."
The words made Dean look over at his lover and he found Castiel looking back at him with a self-satisfied smirk. The look sent a spark of annoyance through him and a wave of desire so he scowled at his angel. It wasn't fair that Castiel was able to mark him so easily and, to the supernatural, so obviously and he couldn't do the same in return. Even his physical marks only lasted for as long as Castiel remembered not to let himself heal which his angel had to consciously prevent himself from doing. Heck, Crowley hadn't even needed to touch him to know that they were together, the demon could smell Castiel on him no doubt due to the wing oil.
It wasn't fair.
The touch of feathers to the side of his face made Dean smile before he swatted the wing away. "Behave," he admonished playfully.
"I don't understand," Castiel tried.
Dean growled as he felt a wing brush his back and then shivered as some of the feather ran along the bare skin of his arm as he'd taken his flannel off with his jacket upon returning home. "Castiel."
"Yes?"
"Don't tease."
"Who says Castiel is teasing?" Raphael asked.
The words didn't immediately register but when they did, Dean squawked and then sputtered when Castiel was suddenly behind him and there were arms around him. His eyes were wide and filled with disbelief as they darted from Michael to Raphael while he was pulled against the back of his chair before his lover's hands slipped lower. The worst thing was that he was responding, the familiar touches inflaming him very easily.
"But... I..." Dean began before focusing on Michael. "I thought you weren't thrilled about this."
"Back when I was not sure of your intentions," Michael replied.
"Dean?" Castiel inquired, his hands stilling before he moved around so his angel could see his face. "You have never cared if there were others present before."
It was true, Dean had gone quite far with an audience before and might even have gone further if it hadn't been for extenuating circumstances, but that was different. It also wasn't like he had anything against exhibitionism either as it could be hot, both for those viewing and those performing, but he did draw the line at family. Which would normally have included Sam except that he'd always known that his brother would run out the moment it became clear that he wasn't going to stop. Michael and Raphael, however, he was pretty sure would actually stay around and watch if they started anything now.
"They're your brothers," Dean said.
"And Sam is- ah, yes, I believe I see," Castiel replied and he was pretty sure that his lover did get it.
"But you didn't tell the demon no to his offer despite not trusting him," Michael stated after a moment and Dean sent him a grateful look.
"I thought it best not to burn any bridges so long as we don't have a concrete plan," Dean explained.
"Crowley has also proven himself to be resourceful before," Castiel agreed. "Though the moment it is in his best interest to betray us, he will."
"I know, but that won't happen so long as Lucifer is free as I don't think the devil will ever forgive Crowley."
"He will not," Raphael confirmed. "What did you tell the demon?"
"Just that the cage didn't hold, I purposefully didn't mention yourself or Mike, nor did I let him know that Cas has been restored and promoted. He does however know about us," Dean continued, looking at his lover.
"He would have been able to smell it," Castiel said before tilting his head and observing him. "You were hoping he could create another diversion for Lucifer to focus on."
"Do you think he could stir up a rebellion among the demons?"
"It would be difficult as many of them see Lucifer as their creator and father," Michael responded. "However it might be possible just like it was among us and that would serve my brother right after what he did."
"Well I've got his number and he's got mine, so we'll see what comes of it. He can't get in here, right?"
"No, we've fully warded the place so even if the salt lines were to be broken he would still not be able to enter."
"Good."
"If there is nothing else, then I have something to show you, Michael," Raphael stated.
"I've got nothing else," Dean said.
"Me neither," Castiel added.
When the other two archangels had left, Dean turned his attention to his own archangel, hoping to continue what Castiel had started now that they were alone but instead he found himself pulled to his feet and led towards the couch. Crap, he'd forgotten that he'd admitted to thinking about Sam earlier when he'd gotten lost in his thoughts and he knew better than to think that Castiel would let him get away with only opening up partially. His lover had already been very patient with him the past few days and he owed him an explanation.
With a sigh, Dean shifted so he was lying down on the couch instead of sitting on it and he rested his head in Castiel's lap before tugging one of his lover's inner wings closer so that he could groom it as he talked. Not only would that allow him to ground himself but it would be a tangible reminder of all that he'd gained since deciding to steer clear of Sam. Not to mention that it had the added benefit of allowing him to do something other than look at Castiel's eyes as he spoke and therefore have to see the emotions he couldn't deal with so easily there.
"I realized the other day that it's nearly a year since we confronted Michael and Lucifer at Stull Cemetery," Dean began, running his oil slick fingers through the soft feathers.
A.N.: For those of you who are interested, my Dean/Cas Big Bang fic will go up on Friday the 7th of October. That's the day my artist and I were randomly assigned.
Chapter 103