Oh my God pecan pie from Denny's.

Look what you bastards did to me. I can't even go get some God forsaken pecan pie and a cup of coffee.
It's not even that you're huge metal arms stuck to my back, either. It's that you forcibly sodomize the other patrons and the like.

They have my picture on their "do not serve" wall, you assholes.

The gentleman who squats pier 54 invited me over last evening. He wears a monocle, gloves, a top hat, and carries a cane, so I assumed he either has fallen from the upper class or has no idea that he isn't. Either way I was wary ( Read more... )

You didn't have to. You really shouldn't have.

Really.

We rented Jersey Girl. It reminded me of us, but not really in a bad way. I wish George Carlin had been my father.

I had this awesome dream where I had the biggest plate of eggplant parmesan and it was so good and then my mom baked awesome cookies. Then I woke up and I am so hungry but there's NOTHING HERE. We need to stock up.

Yeah, but anyway, I went back to sleep and the dream changed and I was doing Liv Tyler. It was fairly awesome.

I think the kids should go to school. Not only would it fill their databases with things that aren't lies from myself, but they'd learn to socialize more.

We had a lovely service for Shimmy today in the bathroom. It'd have been nicer if I didn't try to make a joke about a "21 flush salute," because then of course, we had to flush the toilet. 21 times. And now it's overflowing and I think it's backed up ( Read more... )

So.


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( We finally got AIM. )

http://www.livejournal.com/community/booju_mooju/6538.html

I hate all these bitches. No one cares about my situation.