Rambles
I really only got to know Gretchen after I moved away from Memphis. I'm not sure whether to feel cheated that I didn't get to spend more time with her, or just be happy that I got to know her at all. I'm both, I guess, if I'm honest.
Because I'm so far away, I'm having a hard time accepting the reality of it. I'm sure the first time I come back to Memphis, it will really hit me. No Gretchen to dance at My Greek Cafe. No curly Gretchen hair to play with. No more funny stories about the crazy things contractors do to her projects.
I seem to take turns crying for different reasons. Thinking of John and what he must be going through - it's unbearable to even imagine! Wishing I could hug Kate and Reggie, because she was such an integral part of their lives every day. Reading her old posts about the progress on her house - she worked so hard on that place. Most of all, I'm just devastated that someone with so much life and courage and promise could be snatched away so quickly.
The last time I saw her, she and John met Kate, Reggie, Charlie, Shannon and me at Bombay House. She and John weren't really hungry, and they were exhausted from working on the house, but they came all the way out to the restaurant anyway because it was the last chance to see us (all the out-of-towners) before we left town again. I remember hugging her goodbye, and seeing a little dusting of drywall in her hair.
I think that's what I'll remember most about her - how much she gave of herself to her friends. She packed for hours, helping Kate and Reggie move. She searched garage sales for things to help Michelle and Dan settle into their new place. Whenever there was something to be done, she was there, making it happen - like a little red-headed force of nature.