The verdict is in....

[ourlittlemonkey]

Well it has been FOUR weeks now since we participated in the 'complex behavioural assessment' and I am finally at the point where I can talk about it without crying, so it is time to journal out some thoughts.  At the conclusion of the assessment, Rylan was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder.  Rylan has ASD.  We officially are a family with a

Comments

[dellswife]

I understand your last statement/concern about ariana....with marcus....allison became "forgoten" about...somewhat. it breaks my heart, but we could only tell ourselvea that at this time he Needed more. ahhhh bwing a parent...i send my love and hugs. you are one of the strongest women i know. Rylan has you as a mom for a reason. lots of love! Will help you on this journey any way i can :)

[ourlittlemonkey]

Thanks, T. Ariana is such a strong, confident, independent girl and she REALLY communicates her needs and wants, so I really hope her character will help her always seek out what she needs from us, even when Rylan's "special needs" will have to take precedence. I am hoping that during his "Intervention sessions" Ariana and I will be able to have some 1-1 time while Rylan is playing with the therapist...

[lululily]

Wow. (((MANY HUGS))) I think it's easy to beat ourselves up as mothers, but I think you have to give yourself credit: you NEVER gave up trying to get help for Rylan. It's incredibly difficult to stand up to doctors and other professionals, let alone your spouse. I think your mama-intuition was working overtime, and you should be incredibly proud that you stuck it out.

I'm also glad to hear that things are going so well, and that Rylan is able to get the support he needs. It's a lot to think about, I imagine how overwhelming that must have been. (((HUGS))). Keep us posted, because I'll be thinking of you!

[ourlittlemonkey]

I wish, I wish, I wish I had listened to my intuition earlier and really pushed for an early assessment between age 2 and 3 so that we could have gotten started with professional intervention much earlier, but we can't go back and change that know, so I'm letting go of the "what ifs" and am trying to focus on the "what nows".

Rylan is doing so well in so many areas, with so many strengths to build on. I am still scared for his future, but I know he will be okay in the end, especially now that we will have access to lots more help and services for him....

Thanks for your supportive thoughts!

[mercyb]

Wow. This seems like so much to process yet it must be a relief to have some questions answered and to be able to *do* intervention work. It must be hard for doctors to distinguish ASD symptoms in children when they are very young, but still they have to fully consider parents' concerns - parents who are with the kids all the time (and not just for 20 mins a few times a year)! Thankfully someone did take you seriously...the support and resources at your disposal is astounding. How nice it is to be Canadian

[ourlittlemonkey]

SO much to process. I've been very slow at getting his new intervention set up because I've really been working at just putting things in perspective and accepting where we are at now. We are SO fortunate that Rylan's "special needs" have been given a distinct ASD diagnosis, as the current level of support from the Canadian government for autism in particular is really something... We almost feel guilty that we will have access to all that funding, which we can choose to use for the intervention services, additional training for ourselves (like ASD conferences), supplies like equipment or even things like iPads, etc. We will also be able to access a Disability tax credit and a type of disability education fund where the gov't matches up to something like a $1000 a year for Rylan's future education

[greyhowl]

Oh mama, you are amazing. I am so glad you trusted your instincts <3

I hope having the label opens many doors for you guys. It's such a challenge having a special kid...but it is such a joy, too!!!

<3 <3 <3

[ourlittlemonkey]

Thank you, K! I think the label is opening lots of doors for us. It is going to take some work to make sure that all the choices we make from here (from an overwhelming variety of choices) will be beneficial to Rylan.

Rylan has always been a very challenging kid to raise, but he's also SO remarkable. I wouldn't trade him for any "perfect" child, ever.

Did you guys have or need any follow up with child and youth mental health for Jack?

[jimnifer]

You are such an amazing mama!!
You stated it clearly that and the end of the day Rylan is still Rylan no matter what!
I'm just a email or phone call away if you ever need anyone to talk to.

I'm sending much love and strength your way! <3

[ourlittlemonkey]

Thank you for your support! You've been a great role-model on the benefit of believing in your child unconditionally and advocating for everything he needs!