Yeah. That bulleton was meant for you to see. If I hadn't intended for you to see it, I wouldn't have posted it as a bulleton on myspace. But I took it down after finding out what happened with Amber, and I felt like an ass about it. But it didn't mean that I was less angry with you, because this isn't the first time that you have gotten "shifty" and changed your mind on me to see Ray, or to be with Ray, so yeah, I'm pretty heated. And it's not that I didn't get the chance to get fucked up, either. Because if I cared more about the drugs, then obviously that would be an even bigger issue here. It's actually your "shit happens" attitude that pisses me off more than anything.
SHIT HAPPENS!!! that's fucking life. Im sorry that I wanted to see my boyfriend whom I hadnt seen in two weeks. But I had seen you pretty much every night during that two weeks. And considering he had people in his car waiting to get home for thanksgiving, and who drove out of their way for him to see me that night it kind of took precidence over getting fucked up.
And it's not like this is the first time that one of us has left the other two high and dry. either amber with john or you with matt or larsen or me with ray. big fucking deal, it happens, we change our minds and decide that we want to do something else. who cares. you can be heated all you want about it but im not going to get all crazy about it because in the end it doesnt get me anywhere. and if i did, id probably just end up having a heart attack the age of fucking 25 or something and that's no fun for anyone.
It's one thing that I hang out with Larsen and say that I can't hang out with you guys because I am doing so, which is what I do. It's another when you make plans and then just flake out at the last second. But if thats how you want it, fine... Hanging out with Larsen takes "precidence" over you because this is the first time in 2 years that we have been able to talk and be friends again, and I wont see him for another year because he will be shipped out to Iraq in February. Wow. 2 weeks. Poor you. But you knew he was coming down, and his situation, yet you still said to come get you, which, not only did you flake out, but you put me out of my way. And when was the last time I ditched you for Matt anyway? Haven't I taken you to parties? Havent I tried to invite him along to our hang outs? I would say that I have, so your rationalization is bogus. I was willing to just let it go last night when we hung out at Ambers, but, it looks like you didn't. So there you go.
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And it's not like this is the first time that one of us has left the other two high and dry. either amber with john or you with matt or larsen or me with ray. big fucking deal, it happens, we change our minds and decide that we want to do something else. who cares. you can be heated all you want about it but im not going to get all crazy about it because in the end it doesnt get me anywhere. and if i did, id probably just end up having a heart attack the age of fucking 25 or something and that's no fun for anyone.
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