Cielo and sex and devouring and issues
Okay, once upon a time, back when I first got Cielo in, I essayed vaguely about how I didn’t see Cielo as sexual at all. This is still mostly true! But, you know, I’ve played him through a lot of learning and several AUs and generally figured out a lot more about how Cielo thinks about sex than I did in the past. And I'm bored and tired and therefore this is the perfect way to wake up, right?
There’s…really two ways you could easily see Cielo as being about sex. One is that he’s pretty asexual and non-caring about sex. The other is that he’s fairly uninhibited about it. I actually think both of these are kinda true! Despite them feeling pretty contradictory.
The Junkyard… Cielo has mentioned before about the Junkyard having no sex. This is actually probably not true! I’d be downright surprised if some of the Junkyard denizens hadn’t figured it out damn fast after they awakened. If nothing else, the Solids have Hindu temple style engravings on their walls of people probably having sex and someone would have gotten the idea. I’d bet that most sex in the Junkyard was mixed with voring, but on the basis of sheer numbers there was probably some sex not involving vore. Probably. It’s just that the Embryon had other things to do and were focused on Sera anyway and Sera didn’t want to have sex with anyone but Serph MUCH TO HEAT’S DISAPPOINTMENT and so…I can see Argilla and Jinana or Gale and Lupa having sex if they’d had more time before they died. I don’t think it’s unreasonable to assume that other people did have relationships where the other didn’t die before anything could happen, and that some of them at least had an inkling of what sex might be. Not that this has anything to do with Cielo’s attitudes towards sex, but I find it interesting.
What it lacks is a methodology by which people who don’t already know about sex can be informed by it. THere’s no sex for breeding, probably no real sex for pleasure, just…half understood needs and desires from their past lives which mix with other desires. Heat essayed on the vore thing here, so I don’t feel any real need to talk much about that.
But what I do want to talk about is how the vore thing in particular affects Cielo. Cielo does not like devouring! He’s not going to starve himself any time soon, because he doesn’t hate it enough to die for it in a way that would hurt other people as badly as that does. (I wouldn’t say that he wouldn’t starve himself in some situations? I’d have to think about what kind of situations he would, but I’d say the first thing would be his comrades not being there. Because if they were there Cielo might attack them and then they’d have to kill him and just. No. So very no.) In camp, I tend to figure he sticks mostly to the zombies when the soup’s not there just because, well, even if the monsters in the caves are tastier and a better fight, they don’t really fulfill as many of the demon’s nutritional needs as the zombies because they’ve never been human. And he doesn’t like devouring enough to go out and inflict more of it than necessary for fun. If the others want company to the caves? He’ll go without comment because hey, it’s family bonding time! :D But on his own, he’ll just stick with the zombies.
But back on the topic of sex, vore, for the DDS people, is one of the most intense and physically pleasurable sensations ever. And Cielo acknowledges that he has to do it, but he doesn’t like it. And he doesn’t like liking it. He doesn’t like having to make other people sacrifice themselves for him. He doesn’t really like that yes, he enjoys it. He doesn’t like the loss of control to his hunger (Personally I find it pretty interesting that when Berserk mode hits, Cielo’s line when battle starts is something like “Dis isn’t good”).
And then he comes to sex. And from like, the second time he hears about it, it’s kinda mixed in with voring, because Kuhn and I are horrible people and linked him to “Guts”. And instinctually and from what he’s seen, he associates the desire with vore because, well, for him it is. Cielo…would be much happier with sex if he could think of it as a playful happy thing more readily, but nothing in his background has prepared him to think like that. As it is, when he did try masturbating in camp, I pretty much figure that he didn’t manage to separate sex from the hunger in his head entirely, and that didn’t really make him want to try it. Especially since I tend to figure Cielo does have issues about eating or being eaten by his comrades, and a desire that isn’t fully under his control would make him deeply, deeply wary. Especially since Cielo would totally fantasize about his comrades before anyone else, because Cielo loves his comrades, and he doesn’t separate sexual feelings out from the more brotherly aspects.
And because I am a horrible person and kinda on a past life kick at the moment, I want to talk about Sheffield. Mostly because I tend to figure anyone within a five mile radius had their sexuality fucked with by Sheffield at some point, and it would be infinitely worse for the Cyber Shaman candidates. Serph and other canonmates, feel free to poke at me if you disagree/want to add something/have a different interpretation and want to share that. Actually I’d love it if you shared your interpretation because I like reading essays.
I assume that Sheffield’s primary and preferred method of manipulation was sexual. When he started putting the moves on a pubertal two-year-old to get her to fall in love with him so he could use her more thoroughly, I pretty much figure that’s a safe bet. We don’t know if he used sex to manipulate men as well (I tend to lean in the yes direction, but then I like Sheffield/O’Brian hatesex. I also feel this is an opportune place to point out that Varin’s/Colonel Beck’s code name for Serph was Silver Fox).
I don’t necessarily think that Cielo’s original had sex with Sheffield! I wouldn’t place large amounts of money on him not, mind you. It depends on what Sheffield would think would work best to push him farther towards being able to contact God. But one of the reasons I play him as not really getting anything about sex and persistantly not getting much about sex is that not getting much about sex and not terribly caring about it would be a damn good way to deflect Sheffield. (The other reason is that I think it’s funny, but then you probably figued that out XD) Sheffield manipulates people by their strong emotions (developing love, although he’d probably dismiss it as fledgeling lust, mature lust/love, and hate), and not terribly caring about something and being smiley happy indifferent would be a good way to lose his interest because there’s no hooks there to grab. …Which probably meant that Sheffield jerked his levers about failing/being useless and incapable of helping anyone even harder, but I’m not sure there’s much I can really say about that! Except that Sheffield was an asshole.
So all this is about Cielo’s issues with sex and why he wouldn’t have sex and would be doing his best to repress any sex drive he might have! And not much about the whole not inhibited part. But despite all this, if one of his comrades wanted to have sex with him, Cielo’s reaction would pretty much be “Are you sure? Could be fun, I guess!” It’s not something that would occur to him to initiate probably! But he does kind of…recognize the appeal of the physical pleasure without the devouring, even if he does tend to concentrate more on the “it feels like devouring” thing. And he tends to like touching his comrades even though it rarely occurs to him to initiate it and more touching is probably good. And Cielo…as many issues as he has with the devouring aspects of sex, fundamentally is someone who would be fairly casual and open about sex with the people he trusts.
Kink-wise, Cielo’s actually not that complicated! If he weren’t a demon, I can see him being a fairly vanilla but willing to try out new things poly type. Since he is a demon, he’d get off hard if blood and vore got into the deal. That would probably be a pretty good way to ensure that he wouldn’t repeat the matter though, because he would be wary of either side losing control. He’d tend to be a little submissive in bed, because Cielo tends to be a little submissive period. But that wouldn’t be so much a kink thing as just the way things would tend to work out, if that makes sense.
Oral sex with cannibal demons deserves its own special section, because the power dynamics people usually think of when they think of oral sex are really kinda skewed when it comes to people who are not only aware that their dick is in the mouth of someone who has quite literally eaten people’s dicks before, but still have a desperate craving for human flesh. Like oh say the dick currently in their mouth. First off there’s the sense of danger and risk. Second off…I’m not going to say that the person giving the blowjob is always going to be topping when it comes to cannibal demons, just because saying annything encompassing about human natures and sex drives is always going to have counterexamples. But the chances are a lot higher. (And DDS fic authors, ilu for writing, really! But seriously, the chances of a cannibal demon getting forced into oral sex without anyone losing a penis? Is EXTREMELY LOW. I’m just saying.)
Cielo would be incredibly wary of oral sex! Both giving because he knows just how imperfect his control is (although chances would be improved when he’s had a large meal not too long ago), and receiving because dude, one of his comrades already tried to eat him at the very beginning. My guess would be with other cannibal demons, if they tried to give him oral sex he’d be pretty much “uh hey mon let’s try something else”. Non-cannibal demons would have a better chance of Cielo not going “uh, no thanks bro”, but he’d still be kinda nervous about it the entire time.
So in conclusion, sex is complicated and Cielo’s complicated and now I should probably go do something more productive.
There’s…really two ways you could easily see Cielo as being about sex. One is that he’s pretty asexual and non-caring about sex. The other is that he’s fairly uninhibited about it. I actually think both of these are kinda true! Despite them feeling pretty contradictory.
The Junkyard… Cielo has mentioned before about the Junkyard having no sex. This is actually probably not true! I’d be downright surprised if some of the Junkyard denizens hadn’t figured it out damn fast after they awakened. If nothing else, the Solids have Hindu temple style engravings on their walls of people probably having sex and someone would have gotten the idea. I’d bet that most sex in the Junkyard was mixed with voring, but on the basis of sheer numbers there was probably some sex not involving vore. Probably. It’s just that the Embryon had other things to do and were focused on Sera anyway and Sera didn’t want to have sex with anyone but Serph MUCH TO HEAT’S DISAPPOINTMENT and so…I can see Argilla and Jinana or Gale and Lupa having sex if they’d had more time before they died. I don’t think it’s unreasonable to assume that other people did have relationships where the other didn’t die before anything could happen, and that some of them at least had an inkling of what sex might be. Not that this has anything to do with Cielo’s attitudes towards sex, but I find it interesting.
What it lacks is a methodology by which people who don’t already know about sex can be informed by it. THere’s no sex for breeding, probably no real sex for pleasure, just…half understood needs and desires from their past lives which mix with other desires. Heat essayed on the vore thing here, so I don’t feel any real need to talk much about that.
But what I do want to talk about is how the vore thing in particular affects Cielo. Cielo does not like devouring! He’s not going to starve himself any time soon, because he doesn’t hate it enough to die for it in a way that would hurt other people as badly as that does. (I wouldn’t say that he wouldn’t starve himself in some situations? I’d have to think about what kind of situations he would, but I’d say the first thing would be his comrades not being there. Because if they were there Cielo might attack them and then they’d have to kill him and just. No. So very no.) In camp, I tend to figure he sticks mostly to the zombies when the soup’s not there just because, well, even if the monsters in the caves are tastier and a better fight, they don’t really fulfill as many of the demon’s nutritional needs as the zombies because they’ve never been human. And he doesn’t like devouring enough to go out and inflict more of it than necessary for fun. If the others want company to the caves? He’ll go without comment because hey, it’s family bonding time! :D But on his own, he’ll just stick with the zombies.
But back on the topic of sex, vore, for the DDS people, is one of the most intense and physically pleasurable sensations ever. And Cielo acknowledges that he has to do it, but he doesn’t like it. And he doesn’t like liking it. He doesn’t like having to make other people sacrifice themselves for him. He doesn’t really like that yes, he enjoys it. He doesn’t like the loss of control to his hunger (Personally I find it pretty interesting that when Berserk mode hits, Cielo’s line when battle starts is something like “Dis isn’t good”).
And then he comes to sex. And from like, the second time he hears about it, it’s kinda mixed in with voring, because Kuhn and I are horrible people and linked him to “Guts”. And instinctually and from what he’s seen, he associates the desire with vore because, well, for him it is. Cielo…would be much happier with sex if he could think of it as a playful happy thing more readily, but nothing in his background has prepared him to think like that. As it is, when he did try masturbating in camp, I pretty much figure that he didn’t manage to separate sex from the hunger in his head entirely, and that didn’t really make him want to try it. Especially since I tend to figure Cielo does have issues about eating or being eaten by his comrades, and a desire that isn’t fully under his control would make him deeply, deeply wary. Especially since Cielo would totally fantasize about his comrades before anyone else, because Cielo loves his comrades, and he doesn’t separate sexual feelings out from the more brotherly aspects.
And because I am a horrible person and kinda on a past life kick at the moment, I want to talk about Sheffield. Mostly because I tend to figure anyone within a five mile radius had their sexuality fucked with by Sheffield at some point, and it would be infinitely worse for the Cyber Shaman candidates. Serph and other canonmates, feel free to poke at me if you disagree/want to add something/have a different interpretation and want to share that. Actually I’d love it if you shared your interpretation because I like reading essays.
I assume that Sheffield’s primary and preferred method of manipulation was sexual. When he started putting the moves on a pubertal two-year-old to get her to fall in love with him so he could use her more thoroughly, I pretty much figure that’s a safe bet. We don’t know if he used sex to manipulate men as well (I tend to lean in the yes direction, but then I like Sheffield/O’Brian hatesex. I also feel this is an opportune place to point out that Varin’s/Colonel Beck’s code name for Serph was Silver Fox).
I don’t necessarily think that Cielo’s original had sex with Sheffield! I wouldn’t place large amounts of money on him not, mind you. It depends on what Sheffield would think would work best to push him farther towards being able to contact God. But one of the reasons I play him as not really getting anything about sex and persistantly not getting much about sex is that not getting much about sex and not terribly caring about it would be a damn good way to deflect Sheffield. (The other reason is that I think it’s funny, but then you probably figued that out XD) Sheffield manipulates people by their strong emotions (developing love, although he’d probably dismiss it as fledgeling lust, mature lust/love, and hate), and not terribly caring about something and being smiley happy indifferent would be a good way to lose his interest because there’s no hooks there to grab. …Which probably meant that Sheffield jerked his levers about failing/being useless and incapable of helping anyone even harder, but I’m not sure there’s much I can really say about that! Except that Sheffield was an asshole.
So all this is about Cielo’s issues with sex and why he wouldn’t have sex and would be doing his best to repress any sex drive he might have! And not much about the whole not inhibited part. But despite all this, if one of his comrades wanted to have sex with him, Cielo’s reaction would pretty much be “Are you sure? Could be fun, I guess!” It’s not something that would occur to him to initiate probably! But he does kind of…recognize the appeal of the physical pleasure without the devouring, even if he does tend to concentrate more on the “it feels like devouring” thing. And he tends to like touching his comrades even though it rarely occurs to him to initiate it and more touching is probably good. And Cielo…as many issues as he has with the devouring aspects of sex, fundamentally is someone who would be fairly casual and open about sex with the people he trusts.
Kink-wise, Cielo’s actually not that complicated! If he weren’t a demon, I can see him being a fairly vanilla but willing to try out new things poly type. Since he is a demon, he’d get off hard if blood and vore got into the deal. That would probably be a pretty good way to ensure that he wouldn’t repeat the matter though, because he would be wary of either side losing control. He’d tend to be a little submissive in bed, because Cielo tends to be a little submissive period. But that wouldn’t be so much a kink thing as just the way things would tend to work out, if that makes sense.
Oral sex with cannibal demons deserves its own special section, because the power dynamics people usually think of when they think of oral sex are really kinda skewed when it comes to people who are not only aware that their dick is in the mouth of someone who has quite literally eaten people’s dicks before, but still have a desperate craving for human flesh. Like oh say the dick currently in their mouth. First off there’s the sense of danger and risk. Second off…I’m not going to say that the person giving the blowjob is always going to be topping when it comes to cannibal demons, just because saying annything encompassing about human natures and sex drives is always going to have counterexamples. But the chances are a lot higher. (And DDS fic authors, ilu for writing, really! But seriously, the chances of a cannibal demon getting forced into oral sex without anyone losing a penis? Is EXTREMELY LOW. I’m just saying.)
Cielo would be incredibly wary of oral sex! Both giving because he knows just how imperfect his control is (although chances would be improved when he’s had a large meal not too long ago), and receiving because dude, one of his comrades already tried to eat him at the very beginning. My guess would be with other cannibal demons, if they tried to give him oral sex he’d be pretty much “uh hey mon let’s try something else”. Non-cannibal demons would have a better chance of Cielo not going “uh, no thanks bro”, but he’d still be kinda nervous about it the entire time.
So in conclusion, sex is complicated and Cielo’s complicated and now I should probably go do something more productive.