give me back my piece of sanity
Title: This Time
Pairing: G-Ri
Writer: oxygenlove
Genre: Drabble
Rating: PG
Summary: Sleeping arrangement changes are not really favorable for Lee Seunghyun.
AN2: Written for susifg who said that there are many crying!ji fics around and I agree. I write a lot of them. I hope this crying!ri fic makes up for all the times I made Ji cry.
This Time
There were times back then when Lee Seunghyun would curl up against the wall and he would cry. Silently. Silently so Kwon Jiyong (who's lying beside him) won't hear him and ask the next day You okay? cause honestly, Seungri is okay. Okay? He is. Just... he's kinda scared of this wonderful journey he has started. And he is... you know, wanting to do more but still can't. He thinks he's lacking. Still lacking. No matter how confident he is he still thinks he is lacking. So yeah, he would curl up against the wall and sob. He would let the tears soak his pillow (but mostly his heart) and he would shake once in a while. But other than that, he's fine.
He thinks.
There were times too, when he would not sleep at all and just watch Kwon Jiyong sleeping next to him. And those nights he would often wonder the mysteries of his Great Hyung. He would ask himself many times How much greater can he get? and still, each time, get the slow and steady breathing of Jiyong as an answer. But he thinks (just he thinks) that that might be the answer. Like... every breath that fans his face is this wonderful and logical statement of nothing but J I Y O N G. Like... he's perfect. Damn it, Lee Seunghyun likes him.
Oh no.
There were those times too, when that very same Kwon Jiyong (yep, the great G the Dragon) would slowly, very very slowly move closer to him on the bed they used to share and wrap his arms around the crying boy (who was trying his best not to be found out). Then Kwon Jiyong would kiss his cheek and... whisper strings of English words the kid couldn't really make out over the rumble of his suppressed sobs and frantic heart (also, because of his very limited English vocabulary at that time).
We are meant to be.
Like a b c d e f g.
So please.
Don't cry these tears.
They make me ache.
Don't pretend like you are strong, baby.
You're weak.
And I like you that way.
You're... my hidden victory.
Like cinnamon on my capuccino.
Double shots.
We are meant to be.
You're my forbidden ecstacy.
But times have changed. Lee Seunghyun shares a room (and a bed) with Kang Daesung now. And it's not the same. Never the same. He... doesn't feel like he needs to cry anymore. Or maybe he just can't. Or... couldn't. Or- or! Wouldn't (hope it makes sense). It's really not the same because with Kang Daesung... he doesn't stay up to not sleep and look at the sleeping form beside him. He doesn't ask himself things like Why is his smile always so bright? because secretly (secretly, really) he thinks that Kwon Jiyong's smiles are brighter than Sirius (which is the brightest star in the galaxy with a scorching -1.42 in visual magnitude).
Seriously.
But there are times... when Lee Seunghyun would just lie in bed (with Daesung sleeping peacefully beside him except during Family Outing nights). And he would think of Kwon Jiyong (who is in his own room, probably hugging something non-living this time and really, he's not complaining).
Okay. Fine.
He is.
---
"Seunghyunah~ ya, maknae... what are you doing here?"
"I miss you, hyung."
Kwon Jiyong chuckles at this and moves to make room for Lee Seunghyun. The kid quickly gets under the covers.
---
Of course, there are times too, when there's perfection like this, like that... yo! And Kwon Jiyong's arms are around Lee Seunghyun again (like nothing changed, like it was only yesterday that they were in their old hostel). And Jiyong's kissing the younger boy's lips (finally). And he whispers those words again. Kinda.
We are still meant to be.
Like g d l o v e s v i c t o r y.
So please.
Stay with me here every night.
Cause I miss your warmth.
You are a strong baby.
And I am weak.
And I like it that way.
You're... my victory.
Like cinnamon on my capuccino.
Double shots.
We are forever meant to be.
You're my ecstacy.
And this time, Lee Seunghyun understands every word.
AN: Just to clarify things, this is still me :) And yes, this is fluff. :) :) :)
AN: Happens after the Caffe Latte CF Section TV interview where Jiyong asks if Seungri even knows what cinnamon is after Seungri said that he likes his cappuccino with cinnamon.
Pairing: G-Ri
Writer: oxygenlove
Genre: Drabble
Rating: PG
Summary: Sleeping arrangement changes are not really favorable for Lee Seunghyun.
AN2: Written for susifg who said that there are many crying!ji fics around and I agree. I write a lot of them. I hope this crying!ri fic makes up for all the times I made Ji cry.
This Time
There were times back then when Lee Seunghyun would curl up against the wall and he would cry. Silently. Silently so Kwon Jiyong (who's lying beside him) won't hear him and ask the next day You okay? cause honestly, Seungri is okay. Okay? He is. Just... he's kinda scared of this wonderful journey he has started. And he is... you know, wanting to do more but still can't. He thinks he's lacking. Still lacking. No matter how confident he is he still thinks he is lacking. So yeah, he would curl up against the wall and sob. He would let the tears soak his pillow (but mostly his heart) and he would shake once in a while. But other than that, he's fine.
He thinks.
There were times too, when he would not sleep at all and just watch Kwon Jiyong sleeping next to him. And those nights he would often wonder the mysteries of his Great Hyung. He would ask himself many times How much greater can he get? and still, each time, get the slow and steady breathing of Jiyong as an answer. But he thinks (just he thinks) that that might be the answer. Like... every breath that fans his face is this wonderful and logical statement of nothing but J I Y O N G. Like... he's perfect. Damn it, Lee Seunghyun likes him.
Oh no.
There were those times too, when that very same Kwon Jiyong (yep, the great G the Dragon) would slowly, very very slowly move closer to him on the bed they used to share and wrap his arms around the crying boy (who was trying his best not to be found out). Then Kwon Jiyong would kiss his cheek and... whisper strings of English words the kid couldn't really make out over the rumble of his suppressed sobs and frantic heart (also, because of his very limited English vocabulary at that time).
We are meant to be.
Like a b c d e f g.
So please.
Don't cry these tears.
They make me ache.
Don't pretend like you are strong, baby.
You're weak.
And I like you that way.
You're... my hidden victory.
Like cinnamon on my capuccino.
Double shots.
We are meant to be.
You're my forbidden ecstacy.
But times have changed. Lee Seunghyun shares a room (and a bed) with Kang Daesung now. And it's not the same. Never the same. He... doesn't feel like he needs to cry anymore. Or maybe he just can't. Or... couldn't. Or- or! Wouldn't (hope it makes sense). It's really not the same because with Kang Daesung... he doesn't stay up to not sleep and look at the sleeping form beside him. He doesn't ask himself things like Why is his smile always so bright? because secretly (secretly, really) he thinks that Kwon Jiyong's smiles are brighter than Sirius (which is the brightest star in the galaxy with a scorching -1.42 in visual magnitude).
Seriously.
But there are times... when Lee Seunghyun would just lie in bed (with Daesung sleeping peacefully beside him except during Family Outing nights). And he would think of Kwon Jiyong (who is in his own room, probably hugging something non-living this time and really, he's not complaining).
Okay. Fine.
He is.
---
"Seunghyunah~ ya, maknae... what are you doing here?"
"I miss you, hyung."
Kwon Jiyong chuckles at this and moves to make room for Lee Seunghyun. The kid quickly gets under the covers.
---
Of course, there are times too, when there's perfection like this, like that... yo! And Kwon Jiyong's arms are around Lee Seunghyun again (like nothing changed, like it was only yesterday that they were in their old hostel). And Jiyong's kissing the younger boy's lips (finally). And he whispers those words again. Kinda.
We are still meant to be.
Like g d l o v e s v i c t o r y.
So please.
Stay with me here every night.
Cause I miss your warmth.
You are a strong baby.
And I am weak.
And I like it that way.
You're... my victory.
Like cinnamon on my capuccino.
Double shots.
We are forever meant to be.
You're my ecstacy.
And this time, Lee Seunghyun understands every word.
AN: Just to clarify things, this is still me :) And yes, this is fluff. :) :) :)
AN: Happens after the Caffe Latte CF Section TV interview where Jiyong asks if Seungri even knows what cinnamon is after Seungri said that he likes his cappuccino with cinnamon.