Season 3 Redux: 3.03 (Part Two)
Ok, Veronica, Ok. If you thought your recent Dr. Phil bench epiphany was going to help you in your relationship with Logan, you obviously haven’t met yourself. Veronica, meet pathologically paranoid. Pathologically paranoid, meet Veronica.
Veronica sat on the bench completely still, staring dazedly at the ground, at a spot just above her foot. Instead of feeling euphoric, she felt uncertain and scared, wanting nothing more than to go home, curl up in bed, and sleep for a year. Her relationship suddenly felt delicate and fragile, like it might break apart at any moment. She started to realise that all she wanted to do was to hold it together. Gather all the strings up and keep them close to her chest.
Those thoughts were currently terrifying her.
Veronica looked down at the pad she was doodling on, stopping herself just in time from turning a swirl into an ‘L.’ She furiously ripped the page out of the pad, balled it up and tossed it over the information desk into a nearby trashcan.
“Whoa, baller, you could’ve really hurt someone with that shot.” Piz exaggeratedly side-stepped as he approached the information desk.
“Piz! What are you doing here?”
“Hey Veronica! Uh, Wallace told me you worked at the information desk and...”
Veronica waited. “And...?”
Piz cleared his throat. “And, well... I was on my way... umm... on my way to get something to eat... you know... at the cafeteria... and I thought I’d see if you... wanted to... if you... to join me....?” Piz trailed off.
Veronica blinked. “I’m working, Piz.”
“Right!” exclaimed Piz, stepping back away from the desk. “Of course, I see that. So, raincheck?” He pointed at her.
“Hmm?”
“Another time? I’ll make sure you’re not working first, though...” Piz was backing out towards the door.
“But... what?”
“Bye!” Piz disappeared.
Veronica sat there, confused. Did I just agree to have lunch with Piz?
“Are you Veronica?”
Veronica looked up again. She didn’t recognise the guy standing in front of her.
“Yes, can I help you?”
“I’m David, Marjorie’s... boyfriend.”
“Oh! Right... umm... hi.” Veronica stood uncertainly, gripping the edge of the desk.
“Listen, Marjorie didn’t have anything to do with those drugs-“
“I know, I apologised to Mar-“
“Let me finish.” The guy drew in a deep breath. “I need you to prove I was dealing the drugs.”
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Thirty minutes later, Veronica watched David leave the library. She tipped her chair backwards and began rocking on the back legs. The front legs hit the ground with a thump every few moments or so as she rocked back and forth, lost in thought.
So, a Pi Sig wants to take the fall for his girlfriend? Seems pretty chivalrous.
*thump*
But why did he look so nervous about it?
*thump*
And why not just turn himself into the Dean? Why the elaborate scheme?
*thump*
I think it’s time I paid a visit to the Pi Sigs.
*thump*
The front legs of the chair stayed down. Veronica sighed.
Easier said than done after the whole rape accusation last year. I need someone who will make me look plausible. Someone who would fit right in at a fraternity.
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Veronica hurried across the campus. She was late and her boots were not helping her get anywhere faster. They were, in fact, working against her.
“Veronica Mars, modern college girl on the go.”
Veronica looked over her shoulder, not bothering to hide her groan when she saw who it was.
“Dick Casablancas, Neolithic college boy on the sauce.” Veronica didn’t slow down.
Dick caught up with her. “Now, now, Ronnie, you gotta learn to stop flirting with me.”
“Yeah, I really need to work on that.”
Dick stepped in front of her, walking backwards when Veronica didn’t stop. “What do we have here? Did you forget to look in the mirror when you got ready tonight or has it been repossessed?”
Veronica pulled her coat closed. “Dick, you should really take your act on stage. It’s hysterical,” Veronica deadpanned. “Aren’t you supposed to be with Logan right now? Shouldn’t you be bothering him with this routine?”
“Logan?” Dick looked confused. “If anyone bothers him, it’s most likely to be you.” Dick shrugged, nonplussed. “He called and said he was busy, I just figured he was gettin’ bu-sy.” Dick mimed spanking an ass as he said the last word.
Veronica stopped walking and pulled her cell out, a frown creasing her brow.
Dick smirked. “No messages?”
Veronica remained silent, running her thumb over the screen, almost as if she was trying to rub a message onto it.
Dick grinned. “Maybe he’s banging other chicks.” He thumped Veronica on the bicep before turning and walking away.
Veronica stood perfectly still. The phone hung uselessly by her side. She swallowed and breathed deeply through her nose. Dick’s just being Dick. She breathed again. Dick’s just being a dick. Don’t go there, Veronica... Don’t do it, Veronica. Don’t do it...
Veronica squeezed her eyes shut, but the voice found a way through. Where is he then? What’s he doing?
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“Veronica, hi!”
“Hey, Parker.”
“Mac isn’t here right now. She said something about fixing a computer? For the helpdesk... thing, I think? She definitely said something about RAM because I remember thinking, ooo dirty.” Parker laughed and stepped to the side, waving Veronica into the room. “Come in, come in.”
“Thanks. Actually, I came to see you, not Mac. I have a favour to ask.”
Parker gasped, pressing a hand to her chest. “Oh my God! Mac told me you’re like a spy or something and that you’re always asking her for favours of espionage. How exciting!”
“Umm... private investigator... and I don’t always ask for favours...” Veronica frowned slightly. “Anyway, this is less espionage, more... college experience. Do you know when the next Pi Sig party is?”
“Ooo... Got your eye on a frat boy, huh? Well, lucky for you there’s one tomorrow night.” Parker beamed, pleased with being able to provide the information.
“Are you going?”
“Sure am. Got my costume all lined up.”
“Costume?” Veronica’s brow creased in consternation.
“Yeah, the theme is... music or bands, I think.” Parker pressed a finger to her bottom lip, her eyes looking at the ceiling as if the answer could be there.
“What are you going as?”
“Catwoman.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah, should be a blast. Do you want to come with us?”
“Yeah...” Veronica said slowly. “I think I will... Who’s ‘us’?”
“Just me and Taylor, you remember her?” Veronica nodded. “I’m gonna leave here around 7, so come by then and we can head off together.”
“Ok. Thanks.” Veronica walked towards the door, pulling it open. “See you then.”
“Ok.” Parker followed, standing in the doorway and watching Veronica walk down the corridor. “Don’t forget your costume!” she called after her.
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Logan swung the car around. It amazed him that, in a sea of people, he always managed to spot the smallest blond amongst them. He pulled the brake and jumped out.
“Hey!”
Veronica turned to look over her shoulder, but didn’t stop.
“So, what am I? On a scale of one to ten?”
Veronica didn’t answer. Logan’s brow creased slightly, but he pressed on.
“Gentlemanliness? Look how I resisted the impulse to make a so-called booty call last night.”
Veronica gave him a tight smile. Logan felt a familiar irritation build up.
“What?” He finally asked.
Veronica stopped and faced Logan. “Just the other day my dad was saying I had a thing for trying to reform unreformable bad boys.”
Logan twisted his head slightly to the side and squinted one eye. “What does that have to do with me?”
Veronica bit her lip. “Dick said...”
“Dick said what?”
Veronica was silent.
“Dick said what?!” Logan repeated, putting his hand on Veronica’s shoulder. He felt her tense under his palm.
She looked up at him. “Dick said you didn’t meet up with him last night.” Veronica looked away. “You could’ve come over after all...” She trailed off.
Logan blinked, slightly taken aback. “Veronica Mars, was that the sound of your tough exterior cracking?”
“Where were you last night, Logan?”
“Forget it. You’re hardly the first girl to be led astray by Dick.” Logan’s hand trailed down her arm and took her hand. “What’s this about Veronica?”
Logan ducked his head to look more closely at her. It looked like she was going to say something, but she remained silent. She squeezed his hand, but remained silent.
She always remained silent.
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“Veronica...? Is this something we need to talk about? Are you having a freshman fashion crisis?” Mac leaned against the door, smirking at Veronica.
“What? You don’t like?” Veronica looked down at what she was wearing.
“No, it’s great... I’m just not sure... Who are you?”
“Duh, I’m one of ‘The Veronicas.’ The theme’s music.”
Mac laughed. “Right, of course. What’s Parker going as?”
“Catwoman.”
“Oh.”
“So, you ready to go?”
“Oh...well... I don’t think I’m going to come....” Mac looked down at the ground, then back up at Veronica. Her voice was quieter. “I don’t really feel like hanging out with a bunch of frat boys...”
“You and me both, sister.” Veronica let one side of her mouth curl up in a smile.
Parker appeared from the bathroom. “Veronica! Hi! Wow, you look.... dark.”
Veronica touched the black wig she was wearing. “Just seeing if blonds really do have more fun. If so, this evening’s gonna blow.” Veronica sighed. “So... let’s get this suckfest over with.”
“That’s the spirit!” Parker walked towards the door. “Careful not to stand on my tail.”
“You won’t believe the number of times people have said that to me,” Veronica said to Mac as she followed Parker out.
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“Just tell me what you’re hiding!” Veronica was getting frustrated.
“Nothing, Veronica, I’m not hiding anything, just... Can’t you just prove I did it? I’ve given you all the information you need.” David turned slightly away from Veronica, looking over his shoulder.
Veronica noticed. “Then why do you look so anxious?”
David turned back and stepped closer, lowering his voice. “Stop trying to find something that isn’t there. You owe Marjorie this.”
Something over David’s shoulder caught Veronica’s eye: two frat boys were talking on the other side of the room and periodically gesturing over to Veronica and David. Veronica caught one of their glances. The guy froze and stared at Veronica, before pulling his companion away through the nearest doorway.
“You’re right. I owe Marjorie, which is why... and it pains me to say this, trust me...” Veronica stepped closer. “I’m going to find out exactly what is going on here.” Veronica stepped back, throwing her hands up, and raising her eyebrows. “I can’t help it, it’s a compulsion.” She walked past David, patting his arm as she left, heading for the doorway.
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Veronica leaned against the doorframe, pretending to send a text, her ear pricked to the conversation happening in the room behind her.
“...telling you that he’s up to something. He was talking to-”
“I don’t care! Look, we are close. If we get busted because you can’t keep your mouth shu-“
“Listen, man. I’ve got just as much, if not more, riding on this than you, so-“
“You’ve got more?! Are you kidding me?!”
Veronica rolled her eyes. Why can’t people just say what they’re up to in clear and concise conversations? It would make my job so much easier. Veronica looked down at the phone in her hand, sighing when she realised she’d absentmindedly scrolled to Logan’s name in her phonebook. If this is what being in love does to you, Veronica, it’s no wonder you haven’t been there before. You wouldn’t have managed to get anything done.
Veronica thought back to their last conversation. She was still ashamed that she had admitted to taking anything Dick had said to heart. She realised she wanted to hear Logan’s voice, joke about it with him, hear him laugh.
Veronica smiled. She was about to hit the ‘call’ button, when she heard another conversation in the room behind her. Dumb and Dumber had been replaced by two girls, one of whom sounded familiar.
“Oh my God, he sounds totally adorable, and totally into you. How have you managed to keep your hands off him?”
Veronica realised it was Parker. She could hear her bouncing up and down on her toes as she spoke.
Her companion laughed. “It’s pretty hard, but, I don’t know, we have these great conversations and when he looks at you...” She made a noise somewhere between a groan and a laugh. “It’s hard to think of anything else.”
“Yum-o. I have got to get me some of that. Maybe I could ‘accidentally’ meet him next time you guys are together.”
“Well, he’s going to that party tomorrow night that I told you about.”
“I am so there. You said he goes to Hearst, right? What’s his name?”
“Logan. Logan Echolls.”
Veronica felt her stomach drop. She gripped the edge of the door behind her. She would’ve sworn she had stopped breathing if it wasn’t for the pounding of blood in her ears. She couldn’t think. She couldn’t stop thinking.
He’s cheating.
She’s wrong.
You knew this would happen.
He wouldn’t cheat.
Veronica balled her hands into fists and pressed them into her eyes. God, she was going to cry. Don’t cry, Veronica. Don’t cry, Veronica. Don’t cry-
“Veronica?”
Parker had walked through the doorway that Veronica was pressed up against. Veronica felt a gentle hand on her shoulder. “Hey, are you ok?”
Veronica lowered her hands and looked up.
Parker was with Taylor.
“I’m fine... migraine... sometimes I get them... too much frat fun.”
Veronica couldn’t look at Taylor. She kept her gaze firmly on Parker, hoping her eyes weren’t giving her away.
Rip her face off.
She’s wrong.
Tell her! Tell her not to look at him again.
She’s WRONG!
Taylor laughed. Veronica wanted to be sick. “Yeah, I get that sometimes too. There’s only so much keg innuendo I can take. Great outfit by the way! As an antipodean, I approve of The Veronicas.”
Veronica still couldn’t look at her.
Shut up.
Shut the hell up.
Tell her!
He’s yours. He’s YOURS!
There was an awkward silence. Veronica looked at the ground.
“Hey, I have some Advil?” Taylor started rooting around in her purse, her voice sounded relieved to be breaking the silence.
Shut up. Shut the hell up, you stupid bitch.
“I’m just gonna go home, walk it off.” Veronica brushed past them.
“You sure you don’t want us to walk you home?” Taylor called after her.
Veronica didn’t answer, didn’t look back. She kept walking to the front door.
Shut the hell up, you stupid fucking bitch.
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The cafeteria noise surrounded her, but she didn’t take any of it in. She gazed listlessly at her lunch. She had no concept of how much time had passed since she’d sat down. She stabbed a cherry tomato and held it up to eye level.
As her eyes raised, she suddenly realised somebody was sitting opposite her. Not just sitting opposite her, actually talking to her.
“Piz?”
Piz looked slightly startled, surprised that Veronica had interrupted him halfway through his story by admitting she’d only just acknowledged his presence.
“Er... Yeah. Sorry... I didn’t realise you hadn’t... I didn’t mean to startle you.”
Veronica dropped her fork back on to her plate with a clatter. “That’s ok. I was in a world of my own.”
Piz looked slightly uncomfortable at the dour mood at the table. “Well, I guess this means we can have that lunch date now.” He said brightly, unwrapping his sandwich and taking a big bite.
Veronica stared at him blankly. “I guess.” She said listlessly, not noticing the grin that broke out on Piz’s face.
They sat in silence. Veronica realised she didn’t even have the energy to attempt polite conversation. Suddenly she became aware of a figure on the other side of the cafeteria, over Piz’s right shoulder. She’d recognise him anywhere. Logan. Veronica swallowed. She wanted to cry, laugh, scream, shout, or hit something. But she didn’t. She didn’t do any of those things. She did the one thing that had protected and comforted her in the past. She rebuilt the wall around her heart.
“So, Piz.” Veronica rested her elbows on the table and leaned forward, smiling. “How’s the radio station going?”
As Piz launched into a long description about... something or other... she saw Logan turn and scan the cafeteria. Out of the corner of her eye she saw him pause and felt him looking at her. She wanted him to hurt. Wanted him to hurt the way she was hurting.
She leaned closer to her table companion and laughed, ignoring the confused look on Piz’s face.
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Veronica listened to the voicemail for the third time.
“Hey, it’s me. Oh, I don’t think I’m going to be able to make it tonight, uh... *girl’s laughter*. Hey, I’ll see you tomorrow babe.”
Veronica pressed her phone to her lips, her forehead creased in a frown. After her acting skills had been put to the test at lunch with Piz, she had looked up to find that Logan had gone. She had left Piz in the cafeteria shortly after.
Veronica felt like she was running on auto-pilot. She arrived at the library for work, desperate to distract herself, but instead was running her voicemail service dry. Without emotion, she pulled a cell phone tracker from her bag and fired it up. It was her logical touchstone: track him down and find the truth. She wouldn’t trust it any other way.
Don’t be this person, Veronica, don’t go there. But the other voice was always louder. Everyone always lies. Everyone always cheats.
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Logan was pretty certain he didn’t want to be at the party. That fact, above all others, scared him the most. If I don’t want to party, what do I have left? He took a slug from his beer and smiled wryly. Where’s an annoying tiny blond when you need some entertainment? He looked about him, at the people he was surrounded by. How did Dick talk me into coming here when I could’ve spent the night with Veronica?
“Logan Echolls, wallflower. Can’t say I ever thought I’d hear those words put together.” Taylor perched herself next to him on the back of the sofa and held up her beer. “Cheers.”
Logan bumped his cup to hers and gave her a half-smile. “Was just thinking my party days might be behind me.”
Taylor twisted slightly towards Logan, bending the leg closest to him and pulling it up so her knee rested lightly on his thigh. “What?” She feigned shock. “Do you want me to stop the jukebox so you can make an official announcement?”
“Hey, I don’t wanna put a downer on everyone’s night. That’s just cruel.” Logan slightly turned his head towards her and smiled. As he lifted his head to take another swig at his beer, his eyes stopped on a figure at the front door, staring at him. Their eyes caught, a beat passed. Logan could feel Taylor’s eyes on him, her knee pressed into his thigh.
“I’ll catch you later.” He murmured to Taylor without taking his eyes off Veronica. As he stood, he watched Veronica walk back out the door she was standing in. He quickened his pace to follow her, finding her just on the other side of the door.
“What are you doing here?” he asked softly. His hand moved up to grab hers, just as she folded her arms across her chest. His hand stilled in midair, then dropped.
“I was about to ask you the same question.”
Logan paused at her defensive tone, squinting his eyes slightly at her.
“Veronica, it’s not like I promised... Wait, how did you find me?”
Veronica shifted from one foot to the other, dropping her hands to her sides and looking away.
“So what was it? A bug? A tracer?” Logan could feel himself getting irritated. After not seeing Veronica for what felt like a month, this was not how he hoped their reunion would go.
Veronica bristled at his tone. “Relax. I just traced your phone.” She still wouldn’t look at him.
Logan huffed air angrily out of his nose. “You know, as adorable as it is when you do it to criminals, the surveillance thing is starting to... bug.”
Veronica didn’t respond. Logan stared at her for a second longer before shaking his head and walking past her to leave.
“That’s right, Logan, walk away. Just like you did at lunch in the cafeteria,” she called after him.
Logan stopped and turned his head to look back at her, a confused look on his face. “What?”
Veronica folded her arms again, looked away.
Logan turned back to face her fully. “I didn’t see you at lunch, Veronica,” he said slowly. “I have no idea what you’re talk-“
“Sure you do. I was talking to Piz and you were mad, admit it.” Veronica shrugged her shoulders, angrily.
Logan raised his eyebrows. “Is there something I should be mad about, Veronica? I didn’t see you at lunch, but by the sounds of it, it’s probably best you and Pez weren’t interrupted.”
Veronica put her hands on her hips. “Oh! You didn’t want to interrupt me?” she asked incredulously, jabbing a finger at her chest. “You’re right, Logan, I’m the one who should be worried about being interrupted.” Veronica’s voice wavered slightly. She looked away quickly.
Logan squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head slightly. “What?! Veronica, what are you trying to say?” He took a step closer.
Veronica looked back at him, her eyes flicking momentarily over his shoulder. “Forget it,” she said after a long pause. She gestured to the house behind him. “Better hurry back. Taylor’s waiting for you.”
Logan glanced behind him. Taylor was silhouetted in the doorway. He looked back to see Veronica’s retreating form.
“Veronica!” he called after her.
“Veronica!”
She didn’t turn.
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“Compared to some I’ve been around
...I really tried so hard.”
Veronica frowned at the stereo, but didn’t have the energy to get out of bed and turn it off. There was a soft knock at the door, followed by Keith’s head.
“Hey dad.” Veronica lifted her hand in a half-hearted wave.
“Hey honey,” Keith said softly, walking in and sitting at the end of her bed. “I heard the strains of melancholy rock from the kitchen and got concerned. Should I be concerned?”
Veronica gave him a small smile. “No... It’s nothing. Just...” Veronica sighed and started playing with a loose thread on her bedspread. “Just trying to silence the insane voice in my head.”
Keith smiled. “Honey, if you silence that voice, how are you going to know which harebrained scheme to charge into next?”
Veronica pulled at the thread, unravelling more of the blanket. “Sometimes I think my thoughts aren’t that helpful.” She sighed. “When you said I tried to ‘reform the unreformable bad boy,’ were you talking about Logan?”
Keith looked taken aback. “When did I say that?”
“A couple of days ago, in the kitchen. Were you talking about Logan?”
“Honey, I don’t remember saying that, but, no, I wasn’t talking about Logan.” He covered her hand with his, stopping her from destroying the entire blanket.
“But you do think Logan’s unreformable, don’t you? Once a bad boy, always a bad boy, right?” Veronica looked up at him, then dropped her gaze.
Keith frowned. “I don’t... Veronica, what’s this about?”
Veronica pulled her hand out from under his and crossed her arms, staring at him.
Keith sighed at the challenge in Veronica’s eyes. “I don’t think Logan needs reforming,” he said slowly. “Logan Echolls may not be every parent’s dream for their daughter, but...Hey.” He shook Veronica’s knee when he saw her eyes drop. “I’ve known Logan since he was 13 years old. I’ve had him in the back of a Sheriff’s car more times than I can count and I’ve even thrown him out of my house, but he keeps coming back. You wanna know why?” Veronica shifted on the bed, her gaze still cast downwards.
“He’s not a ‘bad boy.’” Keith said softly. “He’s infatuated with my daughter and I can’t say there’s anything bad about that.” Keith smiled at Veronica as she raised her eyes to his. “Logan always manages to be there when you need help the most. That’s the kind of boy every parent dreams their daughter finds.”
Keith stood and moved towards the door. “Now I’m going to leave you to your insane thoughts, but try and keep the melancholy rock to a minimum.”
Veronica sat unmoving on her bed for a long time. For once, her mind was quiet. Except for one thought. She pulled her phone out from under her pillow, flipped it open and pressed speed dial 3 before her brain could catch up.
*one ring*
*two rings* Veronica tapped her finger on the edge of the bed.
“....munph....sfhiiil....furll...” The phone connected to a muffled conversation.
“Hello...? Hello....?” Veronica pressed a finger to her other ear, trying to hear more clearly. The phone must’ve connected in Logan’s pocket. She could just about make out a conversation. Hearing Logan’s deep voice vibrating through her ear made her smile. She couldn’t help it.
Her smile dropped just as quickly when she heard the female voice. She swallowed and was about to disconnect when she heard Logan clearly say her name. She pressed the phone harder to her ear to make it out.
“...Veronica... that show... shouts at the... watching it...”
“...funny. ...o’s Veronica?” The girl’s voice asked.
“My girlfriend.” Logan’s voice came through loud and clear.
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Veronica leaned forward on the bench, resting her elbows on her knees and lacing her fingers together. She jiggled her legs up and down. She had too much energy to sit still. So, Veronica. You heard your boyfriend of several months refer to you as your girlfriend and you’re surprised by his admission? Clearly not everyone has the same issues as you. She felt the smile break out. Logan had sounded so proud and pleased she couldn’t help smiling every time she thought about it.
The smile faded, she leaned back, biting her lip. What about what she said? What about what Taylor...?
Her eye suddenly caught on the person she was waiting for. “Marjorie,” she called, standing up.
Marjorie spotted her, but didn’t stop. “Wow, Veronica. Pigeons learn faster than you. I’m pretty sure I said something about leaving me alone.”
“I spoke to Scott Hiller,” Veronica called. Marjorie stopped walking but didn’t turn around. “Now, I know you were oh-so-angry that I wrongly accused you of dealing drugs, but you know what?” Veronica had walked level with Marjorie and leaned close to talk directly into her ear. “Turns out I was right, and I really hate being right.”
Marjorie’s eyes flicked to Veronica’s, but she stayed quiet. Veronica walked round to face Marjorie, tapping her lip as if in thought. “And you know what else has been really bugging me, Marjorie? You were actually dealing drugs for the entire fraternity!” Veronica held up both hands, palms facing outwards.
Marjorie dropped her head. “Scott Hiller is a whiny little bitch,” she muttered.
“I agree with you there. Marjorie, I know you aren’t the end of the line. Most drug kingpins don’t wear chintzy dresses and headbands. Scott Hiller’s certainly not clever enough to be any brains behind an operation, so who are you getting orders from?”
Marjorie looked up, raising an eyebrow. “Right, Veronica. I’m going to roll over and give you all the names you desire.”
“Hey, you can roll over if you want, but it’s really not necessary.”
“It’s not going to happen. I made a mistake, it’s over. David’s not talking to me, I’ve been kicked out my sorority, and I’m really not interested in making this worse for myself.”
“David will come around. He was willing to take the fall for you, Marjorie. Most people wouldn’t do that for their siblings.”
Marjorie shook her head and her eyes glistened. “He just can't get over what I did. I think I blew it, Veronica. I went momentarily crazy, and it's going to cost me the guy I love.”
Marjorie stared at Veronica for a beat before shaking her head and walking away. Veronica stared after her.
Momentarily crazy. Sounds familiar.
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Veronica stared at the pen in her hand, watched as it twirled around and around and around her fingers. She would never, could never, admit to anyone just how much she missed Logan. It scared her to think about how much she might actually need somebody in her life as much as she needed Logan.
So this is it, hey, Veronica? You are one of those people now? She threw the pen down. So what? She thought angrily. So what? Maybe it’s time to stop thinking, Veronica. For the love of God, stop thinking. It is not illegal to love somebody. She laughed nervously, felt her cheeks begin to burn. Ok, that may take a bit of getting used to.
Veronica closed her eyes and breathed deeply. Now all she needed was to figure out how to help Logan erase the last month of their relationship from his brain, because surely, no one could forgive-
“Is this the help desk? ’Cause I need a little help.”
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Veronica’s hands were trembling as she pulled the zipper on her jeans up. She wiped a bead of sweat from her forehead and looked sideways at Logan. He faced away from her, his back was bowed slightly as his fiddled with his own jeans. She followed the curve of his spine up towards his broad shoulders and a smile formed when she saw how much she had mussed his hair with her grasping fingers. She watched as he fastened his belt and looked about for his sweater.
She took a deep breath and felt her heart begin to beat faster. Tell him now, it’s a perfect time. No one can hear.
She licked her lips. “Logan?” Her voice came out scratchy and low.
Logan stilled for a moment, his head cocked as if listening to something in the distance.
She cleared her throat. “Logan?” She tried again, her voice stronger.
Logan turned his head to her, pressing his finger to his lips. “Shh... someone’s coming.” He whispered, grabbing his sweater and peering out from behind the shelves. “Let’s go.” He said briskly, tipping his head towards the door.
Veronica paused, momentarily bewildered. Is Logan ashamed?
She didn’t get a chance. Logan had gone.
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How is it possible to love someone...
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...and they don’t seem to know?
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Next week on Veronica Mars: Epsiode 3.04