Like a Sack 'o Potatoes, the Same Old Story...

[pamelina]

begin lament

Comments

[cvirtue]

Did you want this to be unfiltered? Don't forget to call me if you want to come over. Tomorrow, too.

[pamelina]

I don't know who I'd want to hide it from, I guess. So I think it's okay to be unfiltered. Thanks for the offer. I've been talking to Catherine and Kathryn, too. Feels good to have friends.

[antoniseb]

I'd like someone who wouldn't deceive me or himself, even by accident or unconsciously.

I have never been, since the first time you met me, available for the role of lover with you. I think it could have been pretty good and long enduring between us, but I'm afraid that "not deceiving myself" is a very tall order. As your friend, I am very sorry to read that you're going through another split. I wish you a long stretch of mirth with no sadness.

[pamelina]

I wish you a long stretch of mirth with no sadness.

Thanks, me too. I'm tired of living in "interesting times."

[elizabear]

(((((HUG)))))

I really hope you find that someone who will be everything good for you!

[cvirtue]

My sister reflects in general that the term "not able to commit" is really only shorthand for "not able to commit to you."

It takes experience on the part of the person who says it, and the person who hears it, to understand that it's shorthand. Once someone realizes that it's shorthand, they should stop using it and have the courage to be frank. But it does take a lot of courage, because being alone is scary, being honest is scary, and hurting a friend is scary. But it's critical to living as honest a life as one can manage.

[pamelina]

Yep. But in this case an exception was made for friendship. Commitment was made to be friends. I thought.

[alexx_kay]

"Let's stay friends" almost never works, committment or no. Even in the few successful cases I've seen, it doesn't really *start* working until about a year after the romantic break-up.

Alexx, feeling somewhat guilty about only managing to see you two or three times a year...

[pamelina]

Don't feel badly. If I was less 'organizationally challenged' I'd have seen more of you. Your friendship is a comforting thought.

[corwyn_ap]

{hug}

Sympathies. It sucks, and there is nothing you can do about that. If you need to get away from it all, you are welcome to come visit us in Maine (I know, not much of an offer in March :-)

[pamelina]

:-) I appreciate the offer, anyway.