Three Words

[pandragonriyong]

Title: Three Words
Pairing: MinHo
Summary: Yunho, feeling inspired, wants as much inspirational three-worded sentences as possible.
Rating: PG-15
Genre: Humor, Fluff
Disclaimer: TVXQ are the Kings - we belong to them. Trolol.
A/N: I don’t even know ._____. I was writing asalieangel’s request and then suddenly this came along and now I don’t even otl


*

Yunho has been feeling inspirational today. Like really really inspirational. Like to the point where you can watch a man running naked on the streets and you don’t mind staring.

Okay, maybe not that inspirational unless it’s Changmin, but you get the point.

Yunho decides to gather more inspiration in word form so he decides to seek his members. Armed with a notebook and pen, Yunho marches off to Jaejoong’s natural habitat - the kitchen.

The leader flips the notebook open to a random page, realizing belatedly that it’s one of Jaejoong’s lyric-composing books.

Shit, he thinks, then decides that he can live without a piece of paper and props himself on the counter, watching Jaejoong toss something which he doesn’t really care into a pot of something which smells really good.

“Jaejoongie~” he sings, catching the eldest’s attention.

“What?” Jaejoong doesn’t look up from the recipe book.

Yunho hovers his pen over an empty page. “Give me three words in a sentence.”

Jaejoong looks at him. “What?”

“Three words!” Yunho waves his arms around dramatically. “You know, for inspiration! I’m feeling very inspire-y today.”

“It’s called ‘inspired’, Yunho,” Jaejoong rolls his eyes, looking back at the recipe book and going to the fruits and vegetables section of the fridge.

“Yeah, so three words!”

“Go away, Yunho,” Jaejoong says monotonously as he takes out a carton of strawberries.

“Hahaha, good one,” Yunho rolls his eyes. “No, seriously. I need three words.”

Jaejoong shoots Yunho a confused look. “Why does it have to be three words?”

“Because! You like the number three and you’re my best frien- hey, aren’t those my strawberries?”

Jaejoong makes a show of rinsing the strawberries then taking one out and chewing it slowly. “Yeah, but you like to share. And I like an infinite number of three but - WAIT. WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH MY BOOK?”

Yunho sticks his tongue out and doodles Jaejoong stick figures being crushed by Changminasaur and Bambidactyl. “It’s only one page. And I’m not going to leave you alone until you give me three words!”

“Suck my dick,” Jaejoong glares. “There. Three words. Now leave me alone.”

Yunho pouts and makes to get up when he’s held down by Yoochun slapping his back. “Hey, hyung. Whatcha doing?”

“Give me three inspirational words,” Yunho orders. “Seriously, I can’t trust Jaejoong on this.”

“Suck my dick.”

“Said already,” Jaejoong calls out, popping another strawberry into his mouth as he stirs the pot.

“Dammit,” Yoochun pouts.

Yunho pokes Yoochun’s forehead. “I thought under this wide forehead is a brain full of cheesy lines and good ideas. Give me one.”

Yoochun leans against the counter. “You’re so pushy. How about made in China?”

“Oh, that’s a good one,” Jaejoong praises, throwing Yoochun a one-finger salute.

“But not inspirational,” Yunho pouts.

“Kiss my ass?”

“Why are you guys always trying to belittle me?” Yunho’s pout deepens.

“’Cause you’re so fun to make fun of,” Yoochun grins. “And your cheeks are squishy when you pout.” As if to prove his point, he pinches Yunho’s cheeks, the leader whining to let him go.

“Horrible,” Yunho looks at Jaejoong. “Jaejoong raised horrible kids.”

“Excuse you,” Jaejoong glares, brandishing a wooden spoon dripping with orange liquid at Yunho, “but when we signed up to be JaeHo, you took up half the responsibility.”

“… Then we raised horrible kids,” Yunho relents.

“‘JaeHo’?” Yoochun muses.

“You can take away my masculinity by making me the umma of the group, but you make me bottom in any pairing you’re just asking for it, bitch,” Jaejoong growls, turning back to stir the pot.

“Haven’t you stirred that enough, hyung?” Yoochun asks.

“I can’t believe no one has any inspirational words!” Yunho whines.

“We gave you three,” Yoochun says. “You have high expectations, even for words.”

“Slut,” Jaejoong mutters.

Yunho leans forward. “What?”

Jaejoong looks at Yunho. “You’re the slut in our family. Yoochun’s now the dad - I’m the concerned and disapproving mother and Changmin is the youngest brother who’s into incest with his slut of an older sister. Junsu can be Yoochun’s secret lover who I like.”

“I like this arrangement,” Yoochun grins.

Yunho stomps away. “Su!” he whines in a volume loud enough that he knows can be heard from any room. “Save me from umma and appa!”

Junsu comes out of his and Changmin’s shared room after a few moments, face sleepy and clothes rumpled. “Hyung?” he whines, rubbing his eyes. “What’s wrong?”

Yunho envelops him in a hug. “Give me three inspirational words. My inspiration is already dying from those two jackasses.”

“Who are your parents, young lady!” Jaejoong says from the kitchen.

Junsu blinks, rubbing his eyes harder and he’s suddenly wide awake. “I thought you’re the dad?”

“Not anymore,” Yunho sniffs. “Apparently Yoochun has taken over my role and you’re his secret lover who Jaejoong approves. Oh, and I’m their slutty daughter and Changmin is into incest and likes to bang me.”

Junsu raises an eyebrow. “I can’t believe I actually approve of this.”

Yunho whines. “Not you too, Su!”

“You have very high expectations, hyung, true fact is true,” Junsu says matter-of-factly. “And Changmin is the only guy who managed to pass your ‘tests’.”

Yunho pouts. “I hate you.”

“Hey, that’s another good one!” Yoochun hollers.

Yunho flips him off and is rewarded with Jaejoong’s slipper sailing in the air and smacking him. “Stop thinking all three-worded sentences are what I want!” Yunho growls, rubbing his face.

“Oh, I can give you some, hyung,” Junsu chirps.

“You can?” Somehow, Yunho’s already doubtful.

“Yeah! Like don’t give up, do your best, seize the day -”

“Drop it like it’s hot,” Yoochun supplies, Jaejoong snorting.

“Or immaturity rated R for the Soulmates,” Junsu rolls his eyes.

Yunho’s eyes water and he hugs Junsu. “You’re the best, Susu! Now maybe I can get some more quality ones from Changmin.”

“Your incest-loving brother,” Jaejoong reminds. “Don’t forget to play the part.”

The maknaes’ bedroom door opens again, and Changmin comes out with a hand on his hip, eyes heavily laced with sleep and hair tousled that makes Yunho want to ravish him. “I’m the incest-loving brother?” he scoffs. “Who with?”

Three fingers instantly point at Yunho, who rolls his eyes.

To his horror, Changmin actually smirks and he licks his lips. “Oh. That I do not mind. You’re pretty hot today, noona~”

“Don’t you dare start,” Yunho hisses, pulling Changmin out and to the couch in their living room.

“Ow,” Changmin mutters when Yunho pushes him none-too-lightly to sit on the couch. “Why did you bring me out here?”

“I don’t want my screams of rape to be unheard,” Yunho sits on Changmin’s lap to prevent him from moving. “I want to be saved.”

“Yeah,” Yoochun smirks.

“Uh huh,” Jaejoong scoffs.

“Sure,” Junsu smiles.

“Exhibitionist!” Jaejoong coughs into fist, Yoochun leering suggestively at the couple.

Yunho ignores them all. “Min, I’m feeling inspired today. Care to give into your leader’s whims and tell me inspirational three-worded sentences?”

Changmin blinks. “Don’t you have the hyungs to help you with that?” he gestures to the rest.

Yunho looks over at them and pouts when Jaejoong gives him a look that clearly says ‘better play along, you bitch’ before going back to his cooking.

Yunho sighs. “Umma and appa are being their hormonal selves as usual.”

Changmin raises an eyebrow. “Yoochun hyung claimed the top spot?”

“Yes, and now I can’t reign authority over him.”

Yoochun rolls his eyes and tugs Junsu’s arm, both of them going over to Jae umma and begging for food, or at least some coffee.

Changmin rolls his eyes. “Well, my dear slut, you’re still the leader. You still have the highest authority over us.” He’s not sure whether he wants to laugh when Yunho's face brightens up.

“Junsu only gave me three, but they’re not enough.”

Changmin’s arms circle around Yunho’s waist and pulls him close. “Hyung, I have one.”

Yunho readies Jaejoong’s notebook.

Changmin gazes into Yunho’s eyes and says, very softly, “I love you.”

Yunho freezes, not quite sure how to respond. His pen drops and tumbles to the floor, catching his attention and making him look down on the floor.

Changmin forces his face to look back at him. “Forget the pen. Just kiss me.”

Yunho melts into Changmin’s arms and presses their lips together, giggling when he feels Changmin smiling. Changmin pulls away and smiles lovingly at Yunho. “You’re so pretty, hyung.”

Yunho frowns and Jaejoong clears his throat.

Changmin looks momentarily at Jaejoong. “Oh yeah.” He looks back at Yunho, a cheeky smile on his features. “Noona, you’re so pretty~” he sings.

Yoochun chokes into his coffee and Yunho's cheeks flush, much to the latter's disbelief. “Can’t believe I’m the daughter.”

“Umma doesn’t approve of homosexuality,” Jaejoong says, arms folded and hip leaning against the stove, food simmering in the pot.

“But you approve of incest?” Changmin grins. “You’re one fucked-up parent.”

Jaejoong shrugs and Yunho glares at how Changmin gets let off easily with the language when all he did was flash the finger and then gotten a slipper to his face. “Hey, my kids are hot. You guys will at least have some pretty babies.”

“Dibs on the prettiest one!” Junsu volunteers, hand in the air and grin lighting up his whole face.

“That one will grow up with the biggest butt,” Yoochun's eyes flicker to his bandmate’s own, smirking as an image comes to mind.

“The one you’ll take care of will have the biggest forehead, you grease,” Junsu retorts, sticking out his tongue.

Jaejoong smacks Junsu’s arm. “Hey, the prettiest one is mine! Can’t you see how beautiful I am?”

“Beautifully tragic,” Yoochun grins, resulting in Jaejoong hitting him as well.

Yunho rolls his eyes at the trio and focus back on Changmin, slightly surprised to see the latter still staring at him. He shifts uncomfortably. “What?”

Changmin smiles. “Nothing.” He kisses Yunho again. “Any more three-worded sentences you want to hear?”

Yunho brushes their lips together and smiles. “No. I, however, have one I want to say.”

“What?”

Lust flashes in Yunho’s eyes and Changmin can’t say he isn’t incredibly turned on. Yunho leans forward and, so that the others can’t hear him, whispers into his ear, “Do me now.”

Changmin stares back for a second and then promptly scoops Yunho into his arms, the latter yelping in surprise and dropping the notebook, the three stopping their argument to see what caused the yelp.

The tallest heads for Yunho’s room, smirking as he says to the rest, “Noona and I have some babies to make. Hope you don’t mind, umma.”

The door closes and locks behind them and Jaejoong finds himself shouting, “Make sure you make five! One for each of us!”

“That’s disgusting,” Yoochun goes back to his coffee. “No wait, you’re disgusting.”

“I feel bad for the prettiest one already,” Junsu sighs dramatically. “He or she will be so screwed up in the head.”

Jaejoong ignores them, his open notebook and Yunho’s pen on the floor catching his attention. He makes his way over to the couch and picks up both items, rolling his eyes at the badly drawn stick figures of himself being eaten by what looks like Changmin and Bambi if they were dinosaurs.

“That idiot hasn’t written a single one,” he mutters, flipping through the rest of the book and finding none. With a sigh, he rips off a piece of paper and lays it on the coffee table. He clicks the pen and writes with careful handwriting:

Yunho + Changmin = Forever

Jaejoong leaves Yunho’s pen on the table and takes his notebook with him back to the kitchen, planning on feeding Appa Yoochun and Secret Lover Junsu.

It’s not exactly three words, but that’s close enough for Jaejoong.

*

A/N: A drabble. I SWEAR THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A DRABBLE *pulls hair*

asalieangel, forgive your ho. I’m going to go back to the het!HoMin request now ;_; Creepy whispering voice: Eleven days~

More MinHo for you people if you know where I got ‘beautifully tragic’ from! *bounces on seat*