Tattered And Torn (1/?)
Title: Tattered And Torn
Author: partyghoul & blakelywintersfield
Pairing: Gerard/Frank
Rating: NC-17
POV: 3rd Person
Summary: Known as the scapegoat to the majority of the school, Gerard was always the loner. He was the kid who never got invited to parties, the one no one ever talked to, the one who was never given the chance to socialize. Between sneering peers and a malicious teacher, he learned to blend into the background and accept his fate as an outsider. He had given up hope on ever finding a friend... until Frank came along, changing both their lives, forever.
Disclaimer: Don't own any of the characters mentioned in this story.
Author Notes: All Chapter titles come from songs. (usually the song mentioned at the top)
Beta: Docta-Satan and lewiskingston
Warnings: Sex, violence, adult themes, suicide attempts.
Chapter 1. I've Just Seen A Face
Gerard sighed as the bell rang, signaling the end of third period. He watched as everyone shuffled out, then slipped out of the room, last, as usual. Pressing his books close to his chest, he walked through the halls quickly, head down, avoiding as much eye contact as possible. It was junior year, and he still couldn’t stand most of the people at his school. ‘Why should I,’ he thought bitterly, ‘when they treat me like dirt, aside from Ray and my brother?’
As Gerard turned the corner, he hit what felt like a brick wall, sending his books flying everywhere. “What the fuck?” He blinked a few times and saw a small kid kneeling on the ground, hurrying to pick up his books. “Oh… dude, are you okay? I’m sorry, I-” Gerard didn’t get to finish what he was saying because the kid stood up, handed him his books, and scurried away. He was pretty sure he’d never seen him before; even though Gerard blended into the background, he still knew just about everyone in the school. He shook his head and continued on down the hall.
Gerard made his way to his next class - history. ‘Thank God my brother’s in the same class as me,’ he sighed to himself. ‘If I had to be stuck with people I can’t stand all day, I swear I’d go nuts.’ He quickly ducked into the classroom, which only had three or four kids in it, including Mikey, who always got there before Gerard.
Mikey took his folder off of the desk he was saving for Gerard and decided he couldn’t wait for him to sit down before he started talking. “Hey, Gee. Did you know Ray’s throwing a party this weekend? Are you gonna come?”
Gerard blinked. “Ray? A party?” he asked, a bit surprised. “Well, he’s our friend, so I guess, yeah…” Gerard took his seat next to his brother and lowered his voice, not wanting any nosy peers butting into the conversation. “What’s the occasion?” he asked.
Mikey rolled his eyes. “It’s just a party, no occasion. Just say you’ll come and actually socialize.”
Gerard shot Mikey a look. “I’ll go, but I don’t see why I have to talk to a bunch of people I don’t like,” he grumbled.
“Because you might meet someone. Ray’s inviting that new kid; he seems pretty cool.”
Gerard blinked. “New kid? What does he look like? Kind of shortish… black hair?”
Mikey raised an eyebrow at his brother. “Uh yeah, he takes band with Ray and he said he’s into the same stuff we are, so he invited him. Why? Did you meet him yet?”
“Kind of,” Gerard replied with a shrug. “If I didn’t then I’ll meet him at the party.” He sighed as the teacher walked into the room. “I want it to be lunch already,” he grumbled as he pulled out his textbook.
Mikey spent the entire period flicking bits of paper at Gerard and once the bell rang, he shot out the door to find Ray, leaving Gerard alone for lunch yet again.
Gerard sighed and collected his books. ‘Even my own brother ditches me,’ he thought miserably as he made his way outside. He sat himself at a table by the side of the school, looking at the fountain that sat in the middle of the yard.
-
Frank didn’t make friends too easily; partly because he was shorter than most seventh graders, mostly because he was kind of a pain in the ass. He knew this, that’s why he was so excited when he met Ray on his first day. He thought he’d have someone to eat lunch with, but he was nowhere to be found. Frank adjusted his bag on his shoulder and looked around the courtyard. Every single table was full… except for one. He spotted the kid he bumped into earlier in the day and decided he’d try to make amends. He walked up and sat down next to the greasy haired teen. “Hey, sorry for hitting you earlier, man. I’m Frank,” he extended his hand, hoping for a friendly handshake.
Gerard twitched and looked up at Frank in surprise. “Err, uhm… that’s okay…” he mumbled, a bit confused as to what to say. He reached out and awkwardly shook Frank’s hand. “Uhm, I’m Gerard,” he replied, not completely sure what to do. This Frank kid wasn’t familiar at all… was this the new kid? “Hey, uhm,” he started, “Are you… are you new here? I haven’t ever seen you around before…”
Frank laughed and rolled his bag onto the ground next to him. “Yeah, just started today, dad got a new job and well, you can figure the rest. I like it here though, a lot better than my last school… except for the uniforms.” Frank knew he was rambling, but he was too excited to be having an actual conversation to care.
“Wait, wait, this school is better than yours?” Gerard interpreted, raising an eyebrow. “Dude… the people here suck.” He pulled his legs up to his chest and sat hunched, a bit uncomfortable in the position he was in. He sighed and looked at Frank. “What year are you?” he asked, deciding to try and keep the conversation going.
“Sophomore, I skipped a few grades in elementary school. What about you?” Frank couldn’t help but to smile nonstop, he really liked this guy.
“Uhm, junior,” Gerard replied, shifting a bit. “You’re like my brother; he skipped a few grades, too. He’s also a sophomore.” He wasn’t exactly sure how to react to Frank - he seemed fairly high energy and had a huge grin on his face. ‘Smile back?’ he asked himself. Gerard tried to, but it came out as an awkward grin. “U-uhm, so…”
Frank cleared his throat, sensing Gerard’s awkwardness. “So… I uh better get going to class… I don’t wanna be late my first day… so… see ya.” Frank grabbed his bag, stood up, and turned to walk back to the school building.
“W-wait!” Gerard called. “Aren’t you going to eat?” ‘Does this kid realize we have a half hour worth of nothing until the next class?’
Frank stopped and turned back to face Gerard. “I uh… well I planned on buying my lunch today but everything has meat in it and I’m a vegetarian so… no, I guess I’m not,” he said as he shifted anxiously from foot to foot.
Gerard blinked and pulled out his lunch. “Uhm, well, I bring lunch from home…” he explained, “I can share if you want…”
Frank chewed on his lip, debating. He was hungry, but he didn’t want to take food from someone he didn’t know… “Nah, man, you don’t have to do that, it’s not a big deal…”
“No, really,” Gerard insisted, “I pretty much never finish eating my food. I don’t eat a lot.” He felt bad; it felt like he was pushing Frank away, and, though it was somewhat awkward, he was new, after all, and he seemed to really want a friend. ‘And Mikey’s right,’ he sighed to himself, ‘I do need to try and socialize more…’
Frank smiled and sat back down next to Gerard. “Thanks, man.” He felt like such an idiot, such a pest, but if the guy was going to insist, he was never one to turn down food.
“I-it’s no problem,” Gerard replied as he pulled out his food, handing some to Frank. “So, uhm… how, uh… how have your classes been?”
“Boring as fuck, the only good class I have is band, and I have religion right after this, so looking forward to that,” Frank rolled his eyes as he picked at the food.
“Ugh,” Gerard grumbled, “why do they even teach that? It’s so boring. And I could just go to church if I wanted to listen to them talk about Jesus and God and stuff all day.”
“I know, right? Shit, not like my mom ever lets me miss a single mass, now I gotta deal with this crap every day.”
Gerard sighed. “Yeah… and I think it just makes this kids around here even shitter,” he pointed out. “It’s like they hear it being preached all day to the point that they convince themselves the teacher is talking about them or something…”
“Really? Are the people here that bad? I’ve only talked to a few…”
“When you get shoved around and have stuff thrown at you and you’re called every name in the book… yeah.”
“Shit.” Frank set down his food. “This is gonna be rough, isn’t it? I mean, I got picked on enough at my last school, and the people were halfway decent.”
“Just don’t say anything and you’ll be okay,” Gerard sighed. “Admit anything about your personal life, and you’ll be judged by it forever.”
“Did you say anything to get judged?” Frank didn’t want to seem like he was nosy, but he was curious. ‘What could anyone have on this guy that was so horrible?’
Gerard shifted a bit uncomfortably, feeling slightly embarrassed. “It was just stupid stuff,” he grumbled. “They said this fashion statement was cool, I said it looked dumb. They said that band was the shit, I said that band was shit. They went and said that anyone who wasn’t straight would burn in Hell, I said they had a better shot at burning in Hell than I did.” He shrugged, feeling this throat begin to swell up from thinking too much.
“Oh… well fuck ‘em, right? You’re just too cool for them!” Frank smiled at Gerard toothily.
Gerard bit back a sarcastic laugh, not wanting to be rude. Instead, he smiled awkwardly and said, “I wouldn’t call myself cool. I’m a loser, and I know it.”
“Hey, man, if I say you’re cool, I mean it.” Frank looked up at the clock and sighed, realizing it really was time to go.
Gerard shrugged, still giving an awkward smile. ‘Wow, I forgot how to smile,’ he told himself. ‘Pathetic.’ He saw it was time to go, and gathered up his things. “Uhm, so, Frank…” he started, “Uh, I’m going to Ray’s party this weekend… you planning on going?”
“Yeah! Of course! I love parties.” Frank picked up his bag and smiled at Gerard, not wanting to part ways.
Gerard stood up and looked at Frank. “Alright, uhm, cool.” He shifted his feet awkwardly. “So my brother and Ray and I were all gonna hang out after school… do you maybe wanna join?”
Frank couldn’t hide his excitement at the invitation. “Really? I’ve got nothing going on, I mean… yeah, sure!” He felt like such an idiot, he shouldn’t be this eager to hang out with Gerard, but, he couldn’t help it.
Gerard smiled shyly, a bit amused by Frank’s excitement. “Alright, uhm… we always meet up by the big oak out front, near the sign,” he explained. “I guess I’ll, uh… see you in a few hours then?”
“Yeah totally,” Frank waved at Gerard as he ran back inside the school. He only had two classes left before school let out and he couldn’t wait to get them over with.
Gerard made his way to his next class, feeling a bit more uplifted. ‘Did I… just make a friend?’ he asked himself when the realization finally hit him. He shrugged it off as he entered the classroom, but even though it was another long class ahead of him… he couldn’t help but feel a little happier for the rest of the day.
Chapter 2.
Author: partyghoul & blakelywintersfield
Pairing: Gerard/Frank
Rating: NC-17
POV: 3rd Person
Summary: Known as the scapegoat to the majority of the school, Gerard was always the loner. He was the kid who never got invited to parties, the one no one ever talked to, the one who was never given the chance to socialize. Between sneering peers and a malicious teacher, he learned to blend into the background and accept his fate as an outsider. He had given up hope on ever finding a friend... until Frank came along, changing both their lives, forever.
Disclaimer: Don't own any of the characters mentioned in this story.
Author Notes: All Chapter titles come from songs. (usually the song mentioned at the top)
Beta: Docta-Satan and lewiskingston
Warnings: Sex, violence, adult themes, suicide attempts.
Chapter 1. I've Just Seen A Face
Gerard sighed as the bell rang, signaling the end of third period. He watched as everyone shuffled out, then slipped out of the room, last, as usual. Pressing his books close to his chest, he walked through the halls quickly, head down, avoiding as much eye contact as possible. It was junior year, and he still couldn’t stand most of the people at his school. ‘Why should I,’ he thought bitterly, ‘when they treat me like dirt, aside from Ray and my brother?’
As Gerard turned the corner, he hit what felt like a brick wall, sending his books flying everywhere. “What the fuck?” He blinked a few times and saw a small kid kneeling on the ground, hurrying to pick up his books. “Oh… dude, are you okay? I’m sorry, I-” Gerard didn’t get to finish what he was saying because the kid stood up, handed him his books, and scurried away. He was pretty sure he’d never seen him before; even though Gerard blended into the background, he still knew just about everyone in the school. He shook his head and continued on down the hall.
Gerard made his way to his next class - history. ‘Thank God my brother’s in the same class as me,’ he sighed to himself. ‘If I had to be stuck with people I can’t stand all day, I swear I’d go nuts.’ He quickly ducked into the classroom, which only had three or four kids in it, including Mikey, who always got there before Gerard.
Mikey took his folder off of the desk he was saving for Gerard and decided he couldn’t wait for him to sit down before he started talking. “Hey, Gee. Did you know Ray’s throwing a party this weekend? Are you gonna come?”
Gerard blinked. “Ray? A party?” he asked, a bit surprised. “Well, he’s our friend, so I guess, yeah…” Gerard took his seat next to his brother and lowered his voice, not wanting any nosy peers butting into the conversation. “What’s the occasion?” he asked.
Mikey rolled his eyes. “It’s just a party, no occasion. Just say you’ll come and actually socialize.”
Gerard shot Mikey a look. “I’ll go, but I don’t see why I have to talk to a bunch of people I don’t like,” he grumbled.
“Because you might meet someone. Ray’s inviting that new kid; he seems pretty cool.”
Gerard blinked. “New kid? What does he look like? Kind of shortish… black hair?”
Mikey raised an eyebrow at his brother. “Uh yeah, he takes band with Ray and he said he’s into the same stuff we are, so he invited him. Why? Did you meet him yet?”
“Kind of,” Gerard replied with a shrug. “If I didn’t then I’ll meet him at the party.” He sighed as the teacher walked into the room. “I want it to be lunch already,” he grumbled as he pulled out his textbook.
Mikey spent the entire period flicking bits of paper at Gerard and once the bell rang, he shot out the door to find Ray, leaving Gerard alone for lunch yet again.
Gerard sighed and collected his books. ‘Even my own brother ditches me,’ he thought miserably as he made his way outside. He sat himself at a table by the side of the school, looking at the fountain that sat in the middle of the yard.
-
Frank didn’t make friends too easily; partly because he was shorter than most seventh graders, mostly because he was kind of a pain in the ass. He knew this, that’s why he was so excited when he met Ray on his first day. He thought he’d have someone to eat lunch with, but he was nowhere to be found. Frank adjusted his bag on his shoulder and looked around the courtyard. Every single table was full… except for one. He spotted the kid he bumped into earlier in the day and decided he’d try to make amends. He walked up and sat down next to the greasy haired teen. “Hey, sorry for hitting you earlier, man. I’m Frank,” he extended his hand, hoping for a friendly handshake.
Gerard twitched and looked up at Frank in surprise. “Err, uhm… that’s okay…” he mumbled, a bit confused as to what to say. He reached out and awkwardly shook Frank’s hand. “Uhm, I’m Gerard,” he replied, not completely sure what to do. This Frank kid wasn’t familiar at all… was this the new kid? “Hey, uhm,” he started, “Are you… are you new here? I haven’t ever seen you around before…”
Frank laughed and rolled his bag onto the ground next to him. “Yeah, just started today, dad got a new job and well, you can figure the rest. I like it here though, a lot better than my last school… except for the uniforms.” Frank knew he was rambling, but he was too excited to be having an actual conversation to care.
“Wait, wait, this school is better than yours?” Gerard interpreted, raising an eyebrow. “Dude… the people here suck.” He pulled his legs up to his chest and sat hunched, a bit uncomfortable in the position he was in. He sighed and looked at Frank. “What year are you?” he asked, deciding to try and keep the conversation going.
“Sophomore, I skipped a few grades in elementary school. What about you?” Frank couldn’t help but to smile nonstop, he really liked this guy.
“Uhm, junior,” Gerard replied, shifting a bit. “You’re like my brother; he skipped a few grades, too. He’s also a sophomore.” He wasn’t exactly sure how to react to Frank - he seemed fairly high energy and had a huge grin on his face. ‘Smile back?’ he asked himself. Gerard tried to, but it came out as an awkward grin. “U-uhm, so…”
Frank cleared his throat, sensing Gerard’s awkwardness. “So… I uh better get going to class… I don’t wanna be late my first day… so… see ya.” Frank grabbed his bag, stood up, and turned to walk back to the school building.
“W-wait!” Gerard called. “Aren’t you going to eat?” ‘Does this kid realize we have a half hour worth of nothing until the next class?’
Frank stopped and turned back to face Gerard. “I uh… well I planned on buying my lunch today but everything has meat in it and I’m a vegetarian so… no, I guess I’m not,” he said as he shifted anxiously from foot to foot.
Gerard blinked and pulled out his lunch. “Uhm, well, I bring lunch from home…” he explained, “I can share if you want…”
Frank chewed on his lip, debating. He was hungry, but he didn’t want to take food from someone he didn’t know… “Nah, man, you don’t have to do that, it’s not a big deal…”
“No, really,” Gerard insisted, “I pretty much never finish eating my food. I don’t eat a lot.” He felt bad; it felt like he was pushing Frank away, and, though it was somewhat awkward, he was new, after all, and he seemed to really want a friend. ‘And Mikey’s right,’ he sighed to himself, ‘I do need to try and socialize more…’
Frank smiled and sat back down next to Gerard. “Thanks, man.” He felt like such an idiot, such a pest, but if the guy was going to insist, he was never one to turn down food.
“I-it’s no problem,” Gerard replied as he pulled out his food, handing some to Frank. “So, uhm… how, uh… how have your classes been?”
“Boring as fuck, the only good class I have is band, and I have religion right after this, so looking forward to that,” Frank rolled his eyes as he picked at the food.
“Ugh,” Gerard grumbled, “why do they even teach that? It’s so boring. And I could just go to church if I wanted to listen to them talk about Jesus and God and stuff all day.”
“I know, right? Shit, not like my mom ever lets me miss a single mass, now I gotta deal with this crap every day.”
Gerard sighed. “Yeah… and I think it just makes this kids around here even shitter,” he pointed out. “It’s like they hear it being preached all day to the point that they convince themselves the teacher is talking about them or something…”
“Really? Are the people here that bad? I’ve only talked to a few…”
“When you get shoved around and have stuff thrown at you and you’re called every name in the book… yeah.”
“Shit.” Frank set down his food. “This is gonna be rough, isn’t it? I mean, I got picked on enough at my last school, and the people were halfway decent.”
“Just don’t say anything and you’ll be okay,” Gerard sighed. “Admit anything about your personal life, and you’ll be judged by it forever.”
“Did you say anything to get judged?” Frank didn’t want to seem like he was nosy, but he was curious. ‘What could anyone have on this guy that was so horrible?’
Gerard shifted a bit uncomfortably, feeling slightly embarrassed. “It was just stupid stuff,” he grumbled. “They said this fashion statement was cool, I said it looked dumb. They said that band was the shit, I said that band was shit. They went and said that anyone who wasn’t straight would burn in Hell, I said they had a better shot at burning in Hell than I did.” He shrugged, feeling this throat begin to swell up from thinking too much.
“Oh… well fuck ‘em, right? You’re just too cool for them!” Frank smiled at Gerard toothily.
Gerard bit back a sarcastic laugh, not wanting to be rude. Instead, he smiled awkwardly and said, “I wouldn’t call myself cool. I’m a loser, and I know it.”
“Hey, man, if I say you’re cool, I mean it.” Frank looked up at the clock and sighed, realizing it really was time to go.
Gerard shrugged, still giving an awkward smile. ‘Wow, I forgot how to smile,’ he told himself. ‘Pathetic.’ He saw it was time to go, and gathered up his things. “Uhm, so, Frank…” he started, “Uh, I’m going to Ray’s party this weekend… you planning on going?”
“Yeah! Of course! I love parties.” Frank picked up his bag and smiled at Gerard, not wanting to part ways.
Gerard stood up and looked at Frank. “Alright, uhm, cool.” He shifted his feet awkwardly. “So my brother and Ray and I were all gonna hang out after school… do you maybe wanna join?”
Frank couldn’t hide his excitement at the invitation. “Really? I’ve got nothing going on, I mean… yeah, sure!” He felt like such an idiot, he shouldn’t be this eager to hang out with Gerard, but, he couldn’t help it.
Gerard smiled shyly, a bit amused by Frank’s excitement. “Alright, uhm… we always meet up by the big oak out front, near the sign,” he explained. “I guess I’ll, uh… see you in a few hours then?”
“Yeah totally,” Frank waved at Gerard as he ran back inside the school. He only had two classes left before school let out and he couldn’t wait to get them over with.
Gerard made his way to his next class, feeling a bit more uplifted. ‘Did I… just make a friend?’ he asked himself when the realization finally hit him. He shrugged it off as he entered the classroom, but even though it was another long class ahead of him… he couldn’t help but feel a little happier for the rest of the day.
Chapter 2.