Two Lies

[passage]

"Our culture has accepted two huge lies: The first is that if you disagree with someone's lifestyle, you must fear them or hate them. The second is that to love someone means you agree with everything they believe or do. Both are nonsense." - Rick Warren responding to claims that his social engagement with Muslims meant he was compromising the

Comments

[omniscient_fool]

If you look at the etymology of the term 'homophobia' (and wikipedia gives a better run down of this than OED) then it seems that it was coined in the late 60s and originally did include an aspect of fear. Since then usage has expanded to include other behaviours and responses.

Anecdotally speaking, I have often noticed a fear element somewhere in the feeling of 'disapproval' towards homosexuality, even if not always screamingly obvious. That said, there are other terms you could use where that phobic element of 'homophobia' felt inappropriate, such as 'bigotry'.

[passage]

I don't really understand where a fear element could come in; it's not like there's a correlation between orientation and violence, or that anyone's worried homosexuality might be infectious.

Hence the appeal of the 'people think there must be fear because they think disapproval implies fear' explanation.

I wasn't aware that 'bigotry' implied fear. That said on observing how the word is used I arrived some time ago at the view that it meant 'I have no actual argument to make, but hope that if I'm really offensive then no one will notice'.

[omniscient_fool]

I didn't say that the word 'bigotry' implied fear, I suggested that it was a word you could use in place of the word 'homophobia' if you don't agree with the '-phobia' aspect of that word.

Your definition of fear seems to be rather narrow. Fear does not just apply to fear of violence or infection (although actually some people do hold irrational fears of these things from gay people and it's quite callous to dismiss that prejudice). Someone could be afraid of the social consequences of homosexuality, or their discomfort with being forced to confront it.

This conversation is rather passive and is making me uncomfortable. I can't work out if your support for Rick Warren's highly reductive statement is an implicit statement of your own disapproval of homosexuality. I also can't tell if your description of someone using the word 'bigot' (i.e. 'I have no actual argument to make, but hope that if I'm really offensive then no one will notice') is directed at me.

[passage]

My apologies for misreading you - don't know how I got the idea you were implying a fear component in bigotry since you couldn't have been clearer that you weren't.

It's possible our disagreement on the presence of fear is down to a different definition of fear, though I think it takes a remarkable level of broad-mindedness to accuse someone of callously dismissing prejudice