I don't know where to begin on the situation. I am still in awe and it's been several days now. My stepfather made up a lie about me, about us...told my mother and brough in another innocent person in the process. So she's yelling at me and he's in my face yelling at me too. Because someone told him I am a street racer. What. The. Fuck. Who told ( Read more... )

Well. I did it. I think. I have decided finally what I want to do. I couldn't join the military because they don't want to send someone with my medical problems to war. But I still feel this horrible need to do something. Anything that's worth a damn. And a few nights ago it hit me. I'm going to become a police officer. And then eventually I will, ( Read more... )

Last night I had a dream so real that when I woke up I found myself reaching out for him. Of course he wasn't there but for a few seconds I expected to find him sleeping beside me.

I miss him most in the middle of the night when I cannot get to sleep...

I am not cleaning my room as I should be. I am too stressed to do anything more than sit here and breathe. Work has stretched me thin, so thin that it's still affecting me on my weekend off. School work is ever present, gnawing at the back of my mind. J lost his job on Thursday, and the fact that he is unfazed by it infuriates me. He says he will ( Read more... )

Nights like these I hate working in retail... And I'm glad that dead people don't talk. So now off I go for a few hours of sleep before getting up to do my psychology work in the morning... Then back to work to close again at three. I keep telling myself only two more nights and then I will be off ( Read more... )

So as I am composing an email to my english teacher I am subconsciously forcing myself to form the most eloquent and correct sentences possible. It took me ten minutes to write three lines. I am so pathetic.

So. After sitting around and waiting for three hours, because Magick Dragon has such a fucked up policy, I got my tattoo. Which took, honestly, three minutes. Ridiculous. My whole night is shot because I have to wait for three drunk old bitches to pick their shit, and then I have to wait for all of them to get done. When I knew what I wanted, it ( Read more... )

I hate paying bills. It's so depressing. I'm always so happy on payday. And then by Monday I'm down to one hundred bucks for the next two weeks. But, a few good things happened today. I paid off the last of my medical bills. I paid off the capital one card. I now only owe 4800 on my car. And my loan/other debt is down to 1600 combined. So, with the ( Read more... )

I feel like I am moments away from a train wreck. I am walking around prepared for impact. I am waiting for it all to come crashing to a hault. Everything irritates me, and I hate it. I feel like I'm stretched too thin. I just want to get these interviews over with. I want one less thing to worry about, that's all. I think once I know for sure that ( Read more... )

As it is I am always the last to hear about things. No matter where it is or what it has to do with. Family, work, friends, no one ever tells me anything. So on that note I was the absolute last to find out about her. My own mother knew and never said anything to me. I don't know, I don't think I would've believed it. I had to see it for myself. I ( Read more... )