First, I:

an individual reaction to sour, or memory of the sun. Or

the tree at the cabin who felt like my mother, mine

alone

Or,

how some jangle-legged neighbor decides that my body reminds him of a dream
     he had once, swept up in an ex's Misfits cutoff.

Maybe,

it is swimming in the delta

Dog-paddled, salty-eyed, a ( Read more... )

Today I received this surprising email from LiveJournal reminding me that this account was still here, still active, after 18 years.

Strange to see what's changed, and what hasn't, since I was a teenager.

I'm sick of feeling this way. My eyelids get heavier, my body crumples, and there's nothing to curb the storm. Now I'm in my fishbowl, looking out on a world that doesn't make sense to a swimmer who has never known a life without walls. I can vaguely remember what it's like to be out there with everyone, yet things seem a bit more comfortable ( Read more... )

I know you've all forgotten me. It's all right, though, because I've forgotten myself. I detest myself in all my manifestations, like Tolkien and allegory. I know I never gave you much to remember, or much to think much about forgetting, but sometimes I wish you could have seen past the awkward or smiling exterior to the part of me that was ( Read more... )

I think that I am becoming exponentially more unattractive with each passing day. It will soon become infinite.

Some things you may not have known about me ( Read more... )

I have decided that it is time for me to be completely and unabashedly free. There's no more foom for censorship, or for restraint.
I want to run through a corn-field in my underwear or nothing at all.
Because everything is beautiful and everything, really, is free.

So we found a place to live; at least I hope we did. I'm feeling very optimistic about it. I hope that the guy offers it to us. It would be as perfect as we can swing, I think-- close enough to school, extremely well-maintained, comfortable, within our price range, off-street parking, and beautiful. I really hope that it works out. If it does ( Read more... )

I think it's about time I started accepting my own visions of beauty.

I think that cutting myself off from all but a select few of you might just be the healthiest thing for all of us. Let me elaborate:
-I am untrustworthy.
-I am a bitch.
-I am self-absorbed.
Thank you. Let us part on as amiable terms as possible before everyone gets too riled up.