Comments | pattiponders: Marriage Vows...in sickness and in health..in good times and bad?

pattiponders

Marriage Vows...in sickness and in health..in good times and bad?

Nov 14, 2006 21:44

I had a few minutes today in between "things" and I found myself watching a bit of the Oprah show. On the show today, she showed a taped interview of her interviewing a man from his jail cell. The man was convicted of murdering his 2 twin daughters, aged 5. He had documented issues of depression and was being treated for it for a number of years ( Read more... )

Comments 6

thaadd November 15 2006, 05:35:47 UTC

Don't have a spouse, but nope. No more than if they did some other horrible crime (rape, murder of other people etc). Stand by someone...but I think knowing when to walk away is good to.

On that note, I don't ever see myself getting married if citizenship or serious medical/legal issues were not involved.

pattiponders November 15 2006, 21:26:41 UTC

That is the weird part. I don't think the wife thought of it as a crime. She felt her husband was not "of sound mind" and acted out because of that. He was being treated for depression, but she felt the doctors had not done enough for him. She also felt he went around in circles when it came to his treatment. He never seemed to get "better".

Okay....gotta ask....why not ever get married?

sirenity November 15 2006, 06:43:59 UTC

What a horrible, horrible dilema.

You know, I don't even like thinking such thoughts or wondering what I would do because honestly? I don't like the options, yanno? That is sooooo fucked up. I don't think anyone would think badly of her for choosing NOT to stand by him. Ooof. Horrible.

All I can say is that I admire that woman for even having the ability to face another day. God bless her.

pattiponders November 15 2006, 21:23:27 UTC

I know!!!! Options????? My God...leave someone you love because of a monstrous act..OR..stay with them, even though they killed your children, because you still love them!! Ugggh.....no win/win situtaion there!

She still lives in the same house. Even though it is painful for her to remember her daughters were murdered there, she treats the exact spots they were murdered at as "sacred grounds". You should have seen the faces of the people in the audience. I couldn't do it. The weird thing is that she seemed sane....not once did I think badly of her or her decisions. I guess you could say I also admired her genuine love and caring for her husband under these circumstances.

Ugh.......freaks me out! Thanks for answering! :)

jamesbara November 15 2006, 13:45:08 UTC

I have no idea what I would do. While I love my wife a lot, the person who was in jail would no longer be my wife, they would always be the person who was consumed by that rage, or whomever was leftover. There comes a time when it's time to move on for your sake. I would say @ that point, god, buhdda, goddess or whomever you believe in would say that you sastisfied your promise of faithfulness, and would allow you to part ways.

pattiponders November 15 2006, 21:15:35 UTC

As far as the commitment part of marriage, I personally don't think I would have a problem walking away due to certain circumstances. Don't get me wrong, I believe in the commitment, but sometimes "things" happen....(hopefully not as serious as this incident)

I just don't think I could get past the fact that my children were murdered. I would instantly hate anyone that could do that to my children, regardless of their mental state. I think I would feel pity for the person though, especially if they had prior mental issues.

Thought about the show all night.....still a bit freaked over it.

Thanks for answering!!!
P.S. Hope you enjoyed your bday! :)