Everyone thinks I'm getting better. I tell them "really, I don't think I am" but they don't believe me. Is "better at hiding it" really better
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Hey man, I'd be glad to tell you "what should you have done" if you ever have any questions. It'll make me sound like an asshole, but when have I ever been afraid of that? It's a shame that you have to work so hard to hide who you really are. There are a lot of awkward people out there, and I've always been friends with most of them.
I feel like one thing that might help you with the depression side of this is having something to occupy your mind. I don't mean video games that just sit in front of you as a momentary distraction, or forums and chat rooms where you're still confronted with social interaction. Some kind of project with deadlines, either set by yourself or by someone else. Something with work to be done and mental effort that needs to be put forth. I'm sure that you've thought of this before, but maybe it's time to think about it again.
Do a video-blog or something like that, so that people can see through your eyes. Or write about it. Not as a Livejournal entry - make it bigger. You're always thinking of fiction. Life is, at times, richer than fiction.
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I feel like one thing that might help you with the depression side of this is having something to occupy your mind. I don't mean video games that just sit in front of you as a momentary distraction, or forums and chat rooms where you're still confronted with social interaction. Some kind of project with deadlines, either set by yourself or by someone else. Something with work to be done and mental effort that needs to be put forth. I'm sure that you've thought of this before, but maybe it's time to think about it again.
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Did you scream?
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