하루만, 한 시간만, 딱 일 분만, 한마디만 하게
Title: 하루만, 한 시간만, 딱 일 분만, 한마디만 하게 (Just One More Day, Just One More Hour, Just One More Minute, Just Wanna Say One Thing)
Pairing: Kris/Suho
Side Pairing/s : none
Rating: PG-15
Word Count: 12k-ish
Warning/s: Character death
Summary: "Maybe in some parallel universe, we are still together, and so very happy." - Anonymous
Notes (Optional): Thank you for the prompter for the brilliant prompt. This prompt challenged me and I hoped the result of countless sleepless night is worth it. I hope you like it prompter-nim and also readers (esp krisho shipper<3)! Thank you so much for LS and J for always being there, listening to my worries about this fic and also always helping whenever needed. Xoxo all. Crossposted from suhoneyfest!!
[December, 2016]
“Why you are here? Do you have something to tell me?” The man before Yifan asks, leaning forward in his sofa, trying to appear more approachable. Yifan sits still, with his cup of tea in hands. The cup is still full but the steam has been already gone a few minutes ago. The tea starts to cool down but the cup is still warm enough for him to wrap his hands around it.
Instead of answering, he glances around the room, noticing the familiar things to his eyes. Old cuckoo clock besides the windowsill, book shelves filled with dusty books that he can’t imagine reading, the other had always been the smart one out of the two of them. Rows of Star Wars merchandise hanging on one side of the wall, somehow unmatched with the whole professional ambience of the room.
Yifan smiles, even in this life he’s not different.
The man takes notice of his smile, “Excuse me, sir? Mr. Wu Yifan, right? Mind if I call you Yifan?”
At the sound of his name rolling from the man’s tongue, Yifan shuts his eyes. Breath in, breath out. Calm down, Yifan…
Yifan lets out a breath that he didn’t know he was holding, trying to compose himself from the sudden memories flooding through his mind. “No, I don’t mind.”
“And yes, maybe I have something to tell you.”
Seemingly glad with the answer, the man immediately jolts down some notes on the paper. Yifan takes a look at the man before him. Dressed in crisp white shirt tucked inside black pants. The navy blue blazer and brown coat are hanging on a hanger beside the door. His tie is slightly loose, and Yifan has to fight down the urge to reach out and fix it like he used to, reminding himself that he doesn’t know him personally in this life, that they merely have a psychiatrist-patient relationship. The man runs a hand through his styled hair, leaving it a little bit tousled but still looking acceptable for this formal setting.
“What is it?” the man asks. Yifan doesn’t know whether it is a pure curiosity or merely just a practiced act to appear more trustworthy since he would be obtaining information from Yifan that the he would be needing to heal you, just like how the advertisement stated.
Faint white smoke comes out from Yifan’s mouth as he breathes. The air is starting to get colder by the end of the year. The man moves to the heater, turning it a degree higher. “I don’t think you will believe me,” Yifan answers. Or you will be scared of me after this, he said to himself.
“You can try” he says, bright gummy smile paints his face. “I’m here for listening to you, not judging you by your story. Aren’t I?” he adds, putting away the clip board on the table.
“Should I?”
The man says nothing, just keeps smiling at him.
“The story started 12 months ago on January...”
[January, 2015]
A nudge in his hips. Yifan only hummed in response, but his eyes never leaving the book he is holding. Not receiving the response he expected, he felt another nudge on his ribs, finger digging in too deep to cause a little pain. Nonetheless, Yifan still didn’t budge.
“Yifaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnn” A whine was heard, a sign that the person behind the nudging and poking gave up. Yifan chuckled as he took off his glasses, putting it aside at the bedside table along with his book. He loved teasing the other like this.
“May I help you,Your Majesty?”
Joonmyeon rolled over closer once Yifan’s attention was on him, smiling in victory. It was the usual lazy Sunday morning, the clock still shows that it was seven past thirty and they hadn’t made it out of bed ever since they woke up an hour ago. Moments like this is what Yifan always enjoys. When the sun comes streaming into the room and illuminating the golden dust flying on top of Joonmyeon’s head like a crown, making him looking like the little prince just like the movie they like to watch. When all he could feel is the feeling of skin with skin as they tangled their legs under the blanket, bare but warm. When Joonmyeon was playing with his fingers to get his attention and also because it was one of his favorite things in the world.
“I didn’t know you were the type who gets into some kinky shit like slave/prince but well it’s worth a try sometimes. I think it’s pretty hot. But actually, I thought you were more into like…”
“Joonmyeon..” Yifan called warningly, putting a halt to Joonmyeon’s not so innocent rambling because it was still so early in the morning. And the fact that Yifan’s ears were turning red from embarrassment was also one of the reasons.
The other sat up, grinning sheepishly. At least he wasn’t making fun of Yifan’s embarrassment. Despite the people assumption that Yifan probably would be the one who was more forward in the bed department, Joonmyeon was way more imaginative and frank with his thoughts.
“I’m hungry,” Joonmyeon rubbed his stomach, “Let’s have breakfast.”
The sound of Yifan’s stomach rumble filled in before the man can even respond. Well, that was pretty much decided then. “Breakfast, it is.”
“How about having breakfast outside? It’s been a while and there’s this new place I want to try?” Joonmyeon suggested as they make their way to the bathroom to get ready. Not forgetting to slap Yifan’s ass as he walked past through him.
Sunday morning was always filled with a playful Joonmyeon.
“Anything that pleases you, Your Majesty.”
The sky was bright blue, sun wasn’t high up in the sky yet and the clouds made a perfect shade for people to hide. A perfect day to be outside, and Yifan thought there’s no better way to start a morning. Joonmyeon was happily singing along with the song playing on the radio and his happiness was affecting Yifan.
“You look so bright today, did you have a good sleep last night?” Yifan looked at Joonmyeon at his side, one hand reaching out to grab the latter’s hand to thread their fingers together. They still had sixty seconds before the traffic light changes from red to green, so Yifan leaned forward to land a peck on Joonmyeon’s lips.
“You look so cute this morning, I can’t help it.” He answered when Joonmyeon asked why did he kiss him out of nowhere. He only smiled to himself when he heard Joonmyeon muttering to himself that he’s not cute but the pink tint on his cheeks was clearly stating otherwise.
But the happiness didn’t last long.
It happened so fast, one second Yifan was stepping on the gas because the light was already changed to green, one second later he heard Joonmyeon screaming and before he could ask what happened, he felt something heavy pushing him harshly from his side. His head met the car window with a loud bang.
Everything turned black after that.
---
His head was pounding when he came into consciousness. Yifan tried to move his arm, but his movement was restrained by something that was pulling on his neck. His entire body was aching and he felt slightly nauseous. The room was in silence beside the constant beep sound from machine somewhere around him.
“Joonmyeon?” He croaked out, hoping that Joonmyeon was not far from him so the other can hear him calling. No answer.
“Joonmyeon? Are you okay?” Yifan tried again, eyes still closed because he was afraid the pain inside his head would intensify if he opened his eyes. Yifan could sense the smell of antiseptics wafting in the air. He opened his eyes slightly to see that he was indeed, wearing a hospital gown. There was a blanket with the hospital name printed in front on his lap. The thing that restrained his arms movement before turned out to be an arm sling for his bandaged arm.
Seeing that, suddenly the memories were all coming back to him. The Sunday morning. The plan to have a breakfast outside. The singing in the car. Joonmyeon’s scream.
Joonmyeon.
“Ah, Yifan. You’re awake?” A familiar voice registered to his brain and Yifan opened both of his eyes slightly, slowly getting used to the lights. The pain was bearable for now, at least. The voice’s owner was Kyungsoo, Junmyeon’s best friend, who was working as a neurosurgeon at the very hospital Yifan is staying and teaching at universities. The said man was now walking to the bedside, a plastic of 7/11 in his hold. “I just came back from the minimarket below to grab some food. Would you like some?”
“I..” Yifan tried to say something, but his throat was too dry. Kyungsoo sensed it immediately and retrieved a glass of water from the bedside table. The feeling of warm water dampened the scratchy feeling inside his throat and he thanked Kyungsoo for it.
“Where’s Joonmyeon?”
Kyungsoo stiffened at the question, eyes avoiding Yifan in turn to just looking at his fingers. He’s doing that, Yifan noticed. The fingers pulling just like when he’s nervous. “Kyungsoo, what happened? I remember the crash. What happened to Joonmyeon?”
“KYUNGSOO!” Yifan shouted when Kyungsoo kept being silent and avoiding his gaze. His head kept playing the worst scenario but his heart doesnt want to believe it.
Kyungsoo finally looked up, his eyes watery. No, no, no, it’s not happening.
“He’s gone, Yifan.”
---
Yifan leaned his body on the leather seat, looking past the people outside. Young and old. Girls and boys. Husbands and wives. Lovers and friends. He could picture himself with Junmyeon, just like them, if you asked him a few days before. Strolling around the neighborhood, hand-in-hand, smiling at each other just because one of them gets ice cream on the face.
For now, he didn’t think he could imagine much. The only thing inside his mind these days was getting through each day without thinking about following Joonmyeon to the other side of the world.
“He was still alive when they brought you two in.” Kyungsoo started, eyeing Yifan for any response. “But he got the most impact because the truck was coming from his side, and he was leaning his head on the window. The hemorrhage inside his head turned out to be more severe than we expected it to be.”
He sighed as the scenery outside changed from the vast, buzzing city and skyscrapers to green fields, trees and low fences. The trees swayed as the wind brushed harshly past them, tipping them over.
Just in time, the sky was quickly turning from blue to grey, adding to the mourning of the two man inside the car. He heard Kyungsoo asking for an umbrella to borrow from the taxi driver, voice muffled because of the harsh pattering of raindrops slowly decorating the window. His black suit felt so constricting as he found himself struggling to breath as the second passed.
Is this rain your tears that you shed from heaven, Joonmyeon-ah?
Before knowing, he heard the distant sound of Kyungsoo telling the driver to stop, and Yifan knew they were there. Yifan simply tilted his head in acknowledgement when Kyungsoo called for him. “Wait a minute, I’ll get the umbrella.” Kyungsoo said before going out quickly to grab an umbrella on the trunk. Usually Yifan didn’t really like to be taken care like this, but he let himself, just this time.
As they made their way to the place on the cobblestone pathway, the rain had calmed down a bit. Yifan walked carefully beside Kyungsoo, eyes set on the group of people already not so far from them, dressed in the same all black attire as him. A black coffin is placed nicely right beside the group, with Joonmyeon’s favorite flowers adorning the sides. They look up when they heard steps getting closer, and Yifan nodded at them, as acknowledgement and also thank you. He wanted to say it directly, but he couldn’t trust his words right now.
He recognized Jongin, the teenager from the daycare Joonmyeon worked at before. Beside him was Sehun, Joonmyeon’s junior at work that he thought as his own son. He also spotted Baekhyun and Chanyeol too, they used to have routine get-together for dinner when they were still neighbors before, the four of them. But Baekhyun and Chanyeol had to move out of the city because Chanyeol got promoted. Yifan sent them a small smile for coming all the way here from Busan. There were some others too, Yifan recognizes them as work friends, mutual friends of them or some senior high school friends.
Yifan found it inside himself feeling slightly relieved. Joonmyeon’s departure was surrounded by all of the people who loved him, and Yifan could’t ask for more. He made his way to stand between Joonmyeon’s parents and his mother, he pulled his mom closer to him.
“Today, we are all gathered, for the funeral of our family, our best friend, and Yifan’s husband, Kim Junmyeon……”
[December, 2016]
“I’m so sorry for your loss…” The man says, trying to pass his empathy. Yifan offers him a small smile, “It’s okay, I’ve found a way to cope.”
“Really?” The man raises his eyebrows, eyes gleaming with interest. “How?”
[April, 2016]
Yifan turned around in the bed again for the umpteenth time that night. It was late and he had work tomorrow, but sleep wouldn’t come easily to him, just like how it was for the past two months. The slow ticking of the clock was the only one keeping him company at night. Facing Joonmyeon’s side of the bed, it felt cold to the touch. A reminder that it had been a while since it was occupied by someone. The smell of Joonmyeon’s fresh baby soap still lingered, even though it was getting more faint as the days pass. Yifan wished he could seal it in a can and cherish it for the rest of his life.
Recalling Joonmyeon was agonizing, remembering all of the things they did and talked at the very bed, and how they revealed their most naked selves on the very bed. Literally and figuratively. The same place where Yifan slipped that ring on Joonmyeon’s ring finger and asked him to be the love of his life, the rock of their little future family on that night. And the very same place where Joonmyeon said yes. His happiness was always contagious, his smile was always addicting. Nobody who saw him wouldn’t catch a smile on their faces too. Yifan remembered that he couldn’t keep his jealousy in check because of the growing fans of his boyfriend; both boys and girls.
A tear slipped out of the corner of his eyes, just when he thought that he couldn’t shed any more tears. The tears slid down past his cheek and seeped through the bedsheets below, joining the other dark patches that he formed before. He reached out a hand to Joonmyeon’s pillow, the place where his head usually lays. His hand hanged in the air, and he moved it. Up and down, up and down, caressing the invisible soft auburn hair beneath his fingers. The same gesture usually woke Joonmyeon up from his sleep, being the light sleeper that he was. He would always ask why Yifan is not asleep yet, chiding him softly about how unhealthy his sleeping pattern was.
Yifan choked down a sob, God, he misses him so much, it hurts. Yifan shut his eyes tightly, wishing inside his heart that these past two months were all just a dream. And when he opened his eyes he would see Joonmyeon’s worried eyes peering down at him, telling him it was just a nightmare and nothing else. That he’s here for him and not going anywhere. And then he would shift closer to Yifan and he would sing that Chinese children lullaby he learned from Yifan’s mom to lull Yifan off to sleep.
Life was not that kind to him, he figured out. Because when he opened his eyes, the side of the bed was still empty.
Sleep didn’t come to Yifan at all that night.
---
“When was the last time you ate, Yifan?” Luhan asked as he placed the take out boxes on Yifan’s lap. Along with his chopsticks. Yifan shrugged, “This morning? I can’t quite remember.” Kyungsoo came out from the kitchen, bringing a tray with three glasses filled with water. He placed one in front of Yifan, “Eat well, okay?”
The three of them were huddled in Yifan’s living room. The TV was playing a romantic movie that Yifan couldn’t figure out what the title was, not the usual re-run of Star Wars or Hannibal because those two were Joonmyeon’s favorite. And Yifan was still not ready to watch them without breaking down. They ate silently, with Kyungsoo and Luhan trying to strike a decent conversation with Yifan. They keep getting shut down every time. In the end, they gave up and just focused on the food.
“How about your project, Kyungsoo? Is it going well?” Luhan broke the silence when the movie was done and the credits started to roll.
“It goes well, I think. Just one more percent?”
“But how will you try it though? Have you found a volunteer?” Luhan questioned, as he gathered the take out boxes and chopsticks to put in the dumpster. Kyungsoo shook his head, “Not exactly easy to find someone for doing a dimension travel, though.” Yifan’s ears perked up at the mention of ‘dimension travel’, an idea forming inside his head. Yifan hoped Kyungsoo will elaborate, but he didn’t.
Luhan nodded in agreement but then frowned as he saw Yifan’s still half-full take out box. “Yifan, eat some more, can you? You’re getting thinner, it’s unhealthy.” He pushed the box into Yifan’s hands again, which the latter pushed away. “I’m full, Luhan. It’s okay.” Luhan looked like he wanted to retort but the tell-tale of his pager stopped him.
“I have to go back, it’s my shift for the night.” He hugged Yifan and gave him supportive pats in the back, before scurrying to wear his shoes and out the door, leaving Kyungsoo and Yifan alone. Yifan decided to help Kyungsoo doing his dishes.
“So..” Yifan started, “What’s your research is about?”
The look in Kyungsoo’s face was almost funny, clearly he didn’t think Yifan will ask about his research. Yifan felt guilty eating him from the inside, seeing how his friends were taking care of him but he didn’t even pay attention to them that much.
“Just like I said, it’s some kind of dimension travel. To put it simple, I think. We believe that there is a thousand of parallel universes going at the same time as our universe right now. And for quite some time already, me and my team is doing this project to make a machine that will make us able to experience our parallel universe.”
“How do..this parallel universe works?”
Kyungsoo took some time to answer. “For example you have to choose between two things, yes or no. In this universe you choose yes, and you will fell the consequences of the decision you made. But another universe is made for the ‘you’ who chose no, and that ‘you’ will face the consequences of the decision he made. Or.. It can be a whole different universe entirely.”
Yifan placed the last plate at the drying rack, and tailed Kyungsoo back to the living room. “So… There is another universe out there, where Joonmyeon is still alive?”
The question seemed to catch Kyungsoo off-guard as he looksed at Yifan with careful eyes, wary. He might had sensed something already but not saying anything about it. “Yes…. Maybe you could say it like that.” Nobody said a word after that, as Yifan was busy with his own thought. Something akin with hope appeared inside him after hearing Kyungsoo’s answer.
“Kyungsoo, what do you say about me doing the dimension travel?”
[May, 2016]
“The answer is still no, Yifan.” Kyungsoo was about to slam the door on his face again but he was quick to prevent it. There was a battle of the one who wanted to close the door and the one who wanted to keep it open so he can explain himself. The sight probably was funny for outsiders, Kyungsoo being the stronger one despite having a smaller built, but Yifan had no time to think about that.
“Kyungsoo, Kyungsoo, please! Hear me first!” Yifan pleaded. Thankfully it worked, because Yifan was sure his shoulder was going to fall off if they kept doing their ‘door battle’ any longer. Kyungsoo opened the door, but standing right in front of it so Yifan wouldn’t be able to enter. “What now?”
“I miss him, Soo…” Yifan heard Kyungsoo sighed, “Don’t we all, Yifan?”
“It’s been two months, I need, need, need, to see him again. Photos are not enough Kyungsoo. This gaping hole inside me needs him, needs his presence to heal.” Yifan searched for Kyungsoo’s eyes, the latter was avoiding his because of trying to hold back his tears. Yifan understood, Kyungsoo was also Joonmyeon’s best friend, been friends since they were in elementary school, way before Yifan and Joonmyeon met each other. The pain Kyungsoo was feeling because of the loss is the same, if not bigger.
“No, Yifan. My answer is still no. It is too dangerous and me and my team even considered on another way--”
“I’m ready to take any consequences, Soo. I don’t care what it will take, I’m ready.” Yifan pleaded some more, he himself was on the verge of crying. “It’s a win-win situation for me, huh? If something really goes wrong, and I… die…” Yifan had no chance to finish his sentence because a loud slap was given on his right cheek.
“HOW DARE YOU SAID THAT!” Kyungsoo shouted, his voice gruff and full with anger. His face was so red and looked much in pain, hurting. “Do you think Joonmyeon will forgive me if I let anything happens to you? Do you think I can live with that?!”
“We once joked we would take care of the other’s wife, or husband when one of us happens to pass away first” Kyungsoo looked up to look Yifan straight in the eyes, “And that happened. And I’m going to do just like how he asked.”
Yifan knew he should’ve stopped after hearing that and tried again later, but desperation and longing were blinding him right now. He lowered himself down on both of his knees, giving a complete mercy of himself to the man in front of him. Throwing his pride away to beg for Kyungsoo’s help. “Kyungsoo… Please.. This is my last resort… I feel like dying everyday, I need this, Soo.. I need this… I’ll take all the consequences. Heck, I’ll even sign a letter confirming that I’m doing this on my will and you won’t be held responsible if anything happens to me. Just think this as a way to prevent me from hurting myself, at least I will be under your watch in this, right?”
They stayed in silence for a while after that, “Give me a few days to think. I’ll get it back to you on the weekend.”
---
Saturday came too slow for Yifan’s liking. Kyungsoo didn’t even message or call him during the week, and opted to avoid him if they happened to cross pathways. Yifan was growing even more desperate, he didn’t know what he will do if Kyungsoo says no again this time. Yifan was about to go for a nap when his phone rang, signaling a text coming in.
Come to my house. Right now.- Kyungsoo
He appeared in front of Kyungsoo’s door in record time, 10 minutes faster than how it usually was. Kyungsoo opened the door even before he knocked, “We’re doing it. But you have to follow the rules.”
Kyungsoo let him in, closing the door tightly and making sure all the lock was on their place. He looked rather nervous today, Yifan noticed. But he didn’t say anything and just followed Kyungsoo to his basement. Kyungsoo typed some numbers into the panel beside the door, a sound of confirmation followed and the door opened.The said basement was no longer the basement Yifan remembered it to be, with boxes and old things here and there. There was a big chair in the middle of the room, wires with different colors hanging around it. Kyungsoo led them to the panel right beside the chair, only higher in position but facing directly to the chair.
“You don’t have to do anything other than sit down, there.” Kyungsoo pointed at the chair. “It won’t be painful, but there will be a lot of wires that I will put on you. For your vital signs, for your ECG, for your EEG and soon.”
To make it easy to explain, Kyungsoo grabbed for a paper and put in on the table where they both can see. He drew two stick figures. “Here,” he pointed at the stick figures on the right, “Is you. You in March 2016. The now you. And this one,” he pointed to another stick figures on the left, “Is the other universe “you”. You see that on the other universe, they have a body but with a different mind as yours. Thus, we won’t transport your March 2016 body there, but only your soul.”
“Here is the dangerous part. I’ll be putting you on a REM-stage. And then transfer your soul to the other universe. I can’t promise you would find Joonmyeon immediately, but I’m sure he’s somewhere there. During this, you have to be aware that your mind is not on it’s own universe, not in it’s own place. You can’t be there for too long, so I’ll have to wake you up. To wake you up, I have to pull you out of the REM stage, it’s easy. But, if you let yourself in too deep, if you let your sleep into the stage, 3 or 4, or in other words, deep sleep, it’ll be hard for me to pull you back.”
“And if that happens and I couldn’t pull you back..” Kyungsoo’s words hung in the air, hesitancy is clear in his form. Yifan nudges him, “What?”
“Both of yourself will die. In this universe, and in that universe. Your soul will be suspended in the 4th dimension, because you are deemed to not fit in both of the universes. Your soul won’t be able to descend to the heaven either because of it.”
Yifan was silent after the explanation, letting all the information get into his brain and process themselves. He felt himself almost back up after Kyungsoo said that he could die in this experiment, but Kyungsoo already stated before that there will be consequences in this and he himself said that he’s willing to go through it.
“How? You still have time to back out from this. Which I strongly suggest you too.”
He was already here. He knew he just has to sit down on that chair and he will meet Joonmyeon. Well, there was no guarantee but he was sure he can do something to make it possible. Just the thought of seeing that smile in Joonmyeon again one more time…. Yifan smiled at the thought.
See you soon, Kim Joonmyeon.
“Sorry to disappoint you Soo, but I’m not backing out.”
[December, 2016
“That...machine. Really exists in this world?” The man looks up from his note to look at Yifan. Yifan can feel that he’s curious, but also sense a bit of unsureness and doubt. He can’t blame the man if he’s questioning his story right now.
“I guess Kyungsoo is that genius afterall.”
[May, 2016]
It felt just like falling asleep, like getting into a deep sleep. Yifan almost thought that Kyungsoo was lying about this whole experiment but it was highly unlikely. He dismissed the thought before it even resurfaced quickly. He didn’t feel anything, not even those dizzy sensation or anything like those in sci-fi movie shows.
Did this mean the experiment fail?
There was a sudden loud noise of a door being opened and it startled Yifan. He opened his eyes to see what it was and wanting to ask Kyungsoo what’s wrong, but instead of the sight of Kyungsoo’s underground laboratory, he’s met with the sight of unfamiliar bedroom. He looked around the room and noticed that there was another bed not far from him, and judging from the mess he could tell the occupant is a male. The room was not big but enough to fit in two beds, tables and also some drawers.
Is it some kind of dorm? Yifan guessed. But clearly not college dorms, because he couldn’t see any books inside the room besides some magazines and Korean Learning books. Deep in his thoughts, he didn’t realize someone coming out from the bathroom.
“Oh, Kris! You woke up already?” A familiar voice greeted him and when he looked to the voice direction, it’s Luhan standing in front of the door, busy getting in arms inside a jacket. He looked ready to go out.
“Luhan? What are you doing here?”
Luhan looked at him with a funny expresion on his face, “I’m...here because this is also my room? What are you talking about, you must’ve been drinking again last night. Don’t let the manager hyung knows or you’ll be dead.” Luhan threw a shirt and a jacket in his direction, Yifan’s hands moved in reflex to catch it. “Now, dress yourself. We have practice in a 1 hour.”
“Practice?”
“God, Yifan! How much did you drink last night? Come on! Get your body moving because I want to grab some breakfast on the way to the SM building. Let’s hope your mind will be sober enough when we get there.”
---
Luhan couldn’t stop talking on the way to the restaurant, pointing out things here and there. He might had said something about ‘EXO’ and also ‘Leader’ and also upcoming schedule he and some others will have to attend tonight. Yifan was starting to get a grasp about what kind of universe he was in, and what was him in this universe but to make sure, he borrowed Luhan’s phone (he made up reasons about his phone being left in the dorm when he actually had no idea where his phone was) and went into Naver to search for ‘EXO’.
The article at the top pretty much confirmed his guess. He was Kris, a part of a South Korean-Chinese boy group EXO. He also figured out that he’s the leader of the group’s subgroup, EXO-M. There were another three Chinese members in the group, and apparently Luhan was also one of them. His fingers stopped scrolling when he saw one name on the list of band members..
“Kim Junmyeon?” He didn’t notice he said it out loud until Luhan nudged him with his foot, “Why? Junmyeon, why? Is he calling?”
“What? No, no.” Yifan quickly answered before Luhan snatched his phone back. He still needed it to find out about this Kim Joonmyeon. His heart starting to beat faster. Is it him, is it him? After three months? Three months of not seeing Joonmyeon’s face, three months of not hearing his voice, three months without any kind of physical contact with him.
It’s like seeing a light on the end of the tunnel.
“Are you done yet? Let’s go!”
---
Nothing had prepared Yifan for this. After getting inside the room, his eyes landed on the boy dressed in printed animation t-shirt sitting not far from the mirror across him. Nothing prepared him from the smile that he received when the boy looked up , and greeted him. Nothing prepared him when the boy stood up and walked towards him, touching his arms gently and telling him that they would have to talk about upcoming schedule in China.
Yifan’s body reacted by itself and nobody can stop him when he wrapped his arms around the boy’s body, burying his head on the crook of the boy’s neck to inhale his scent because the scent on his pillow was starting to fade. To run his fingers between the locks of the boy’s hair because he was starting to forget how soft it felt under his fingertips. He didn’t even realize he cried and only did when Joonmyeon started to ask about it because he felt his shirt getting damp.
He pulled himself back to take a look at Joonmyeon’s face, palms on both side of the smaller’s face just because Yifan can’t believe it. Joonmyeon, in all flesh and blood, standing in front of him. Standing in front of him in his hold.
“Yifan, are you okay?” Joonmyeon asked, eyebrows taut together in concern. And Yifan wanted to lean down and kiss the wrinkle forming in Joonmyeon’s forehead away.
“Okay? I’m beyond okay, Joonmyeon.” Yifan answered, voice thin because of crying. He couldn’t care less about the fact that Joonmyeon (and also the other guys) had no idea why he was like this and they might be confused as hell, he could explain it later. He was just.. happy. He wanted to enjoy this as much as he can.
”I just--”
Yifan didn’t get to finish his sentence when there were two man coming inside the room, looking around to find Yifan hugging Joonmyeon and the other ten members frozen in their place because of the scene they just witnessed. “What happened here? Come on! Let’s get into practice!” The choreographer’s voice boomed inside the room, waking all of the members from their trance. Not wanting to make the choreographer mad, they quickly went into their positions.
“Yifan, are you okay?” Joonmyeon repeated himself, urgency behind his words because they have to start their practice soon. Yifan was silent, still staring at Joonmyeon.
He can’t believe it…
“YIFAN! JOONMYEON! If you guys keep doing this then I’ll be giving you guys four more hours of practice!!” It was the manager’s turn to shout from the other side of the room. Hearing the threat, Joonmyeon quickly detached himself from Yifan. Yifan frowned at the action. “We’ll talk about this later, okay? I don’t want both of us to get into trouble.” Yifan wanted to stop him, but a look from Joonmyeon stopped him and he quickly adjusted. Just like Joonmyeon said, he himself didn’t want them to get int trouble.
It turned out the four more hours of practice was clearly needed for Yifan because he couldn’t stop messing up with the choreography, he couldn’t keep his eyes off of Joonmyeon all the time. So the manager told him to stay behind while the others go home and get some rest. It was actually a bit dissapointing to Yifan to see Joonmyeon going out of the room with the others and left him alone, not even giving him a pat in the back like the others for encouragement.
Yifan laid down on the hardwood floor, starring at the ceiling. His breath were coming out in pants, and he could feel his t-shirt sticks to his back. Out of all the universe out there, how could be this is where he ended up at? He was clearly happy, no scratch that, he’s beyond happy he got to see Joonmyeon again. But the dancing part was exhausting him. Yifan decided to start giving those boybands more appreciation after this.
“You won’t get any choreography done if you keep being lazy like that.” Someone said suddenly before followed by a light chuckle. Yifan looked around to see Joonmyeon standing on the door, leaning his body on the door frame with a mini-market plastic bag on one hand. “I brought food.”
“Do you want to talk about…” Joonmyeon started as he poured the seasoning inside his ramyeon cup, “..about what happened? Why were you…”
“Have you ever missed someone so much, Joonmyeon?” Yifan asked back, his ramyeon cup untouched because he didn’t bother with it. His eyes had been on Joonmyeon all the time Joonmyeon was in the room. He noticed the slight blushes Joonmyeon was sporting because of his intense stare, but he didn’t point it that out. He didn’t want Joonmyeon to hide it because of embarrassment, that’s something that clearly Joonmyeon liked to do.
“I think.. I have.” Joonmyeon answered in between his intake of hot noodles. Some of the broth made stain on the corner of his lips, and Yifan took it upon himself to clean it himself with his thumb before Joonmyeon started searching for a tissue. “You’re still the same, getting food all over yourself when you’re hungry.” Yifan said, smiling fondly.
If his face was pink before, it was flaming red right now because of Yifan’s action. Yifan found it so endearingly cute. His soft white skin blends together well with the red flushes. “So, what if I’ve missed someone too much, before? Are you, now?”
Yifan nodded, sighing happily as he placed his head on his arm that was perched on one knee. “I am, now. But I’m happy, I finally get to meet the person I miss the most. Right now, sitting in front of me.”
“Eng?” Joonmyeon looked up from the rim of his ramyeon cup, “Did we just meet jahbfiubefinsiomfoibg?”
“What, Joonmyeon? I can’t hear you well.”
“Did we jenfiojh hjwebfwjn ebfiwjnfenw?”
Yifan leaned forward, hoping to hear Joonmyeon better. “What, Joonmyeon?”
Just then, his sight was starting to get blurry. And he could hear Joonmyeon saying something again, but Yifan couldn’t quite catch it because the voice sounded so distant right now. Before he could question anything, this sight went black entirely.
---
When he woke up, he was met by the the sight of Kyungsoo’s worried face. His eyes were still adjusting to the lights and his mind was still kind of fuzzy, but he could hear Kyungsoo sighing in relief, muttering “Thank God he wakes up” under his breath.
“How’s Joonmyeon?” Kyungsoo asked when Yifan was awake enough to sit down.
Yifan didn’t say anything, but the smile on his face was an answer enough.
[June, 2016]
The next time he woke up, the first thing he noticed was the pain on his lower back. It was the kind of pain that appears when you sleep in a wrong position for a long time. Wrong position in this one means sitting with your upper body slumping forward, Yifan remembered this kind of pain happened a lot when he was still in Junior High, with his rate of sleeping in class was two classes out of five classes in a day. The room was silent other than the light giggles from his left and right but he wasn’t quite sure about why, or at what.
“Have a nice nap, Mr. Wu?” someone asked but Yifan couldn’t see his face from his position on the table. He straightened his body slowly, groaning when he felt his spine getting back into their place one by one again. There was someone poking him at the ribs and when he turned his head, he saw Sehun looking at him.
“Sehun? What?” Yifan yawned. Instead of answering, Sehun only fidgeted more on his seat, his eyes moving to one side, trying to give Yifan signals. Look at the front, he mouthed. Not knowing what happened, Yifan obeyed Sehun and looked at the front.
“I asked, did you have a nice nap, Mr. Wu?” an old man, who seemed to be a math teacher (Yifan peeks at the white board full with numbers and y, x.. in front) was now standing in front of his table, smiling oh so sweetly at him.
Oh shit.
“Uh, no I didn-- I’m sorry sir, I--” Yifan’s mind was racing to find something to say, some excuse or, or, or.. just anything!
“You might need some refreshment. How about…. 30 laps around the school field?”
---
Yifan felt his legs started to give up at the 15th lap, but he kept on going. He used to be strong at keeping his performance on two hours basketball practice but he really felt like he was going to die this time. It was 15 minutes to the end of the school hours, basically. If he’s lucky, he could go slow and flee to find Joonmyeon (he didn’t forget his purpose here, of course) when no one noticed once the school bell rings. Probaby Joonmyeon was in this school too, a teacher, or maybe a student.
It was his 19th lap when the school bell rang and Yifan couldn’t take it anymore. Why did he keep ending up in a universe where he needs to use his body? He threw himself on the top of green bed of grass, not caring about his white button-up uniform and tried to catch his breath. The sun was high up in the sky, which was no help in Yifan’s situation, only making it even worse. He heard the tell-tale sound of shoes, a sign that classes were already dismissed. But Yifan didn’t even had the energy to sit down right now, let alone walking up three set of stairs to his class and grabs his bag.
He was starting to get dizzy, but not the kind of dizzy he felt before he blacked out in his last dimension travel. The dizzy that someone felt when he’s about to pass out. Or dies? How funny it would be if he dies right there right then out of dehydration when he hadn’t even met Joonmyeon.
“You’ll get dehydration if you keep laying there.” A familiar voice greeted him and as if there was an energy shot given to him, Yifan quickly sat up and looked up to the voice’s owner, face partly hidden because he has his back to the sun. But Yifan coukd see the name tag on his school blazer clearly. Just the name he wanted to see. The owner of the voice had his bag in one hand, and his free hand was holding a book that just screamed knowledge all over. “Mr. Lee asked me to tutor you for the lesson you missed because, you know..” He tsk’d, “..Sleeping in class. Which is irresponsible.”
Heaven was clearly on his side, he didn’t even need to search and yet here he is. The love of his life standing right in front of him once again.
“Well, it’s not my fault they set the math lesson as the last subject of the day.” Yifan stood up, grinning at Junmyeon who was making an annoyed face. Gosh, it felt like going back to high school all over again. Messing up with someone just because you like them and when teasing is the way to show affection for sappy delinquent like Yifan.
Junmyeon tsk’d again, and threw his backpack at him. “Can we start the tutoring now?”
“Hmmm…” Yifan pretended to think hard, just to see Junmyeon rolling his eyes at him. “I can! I’ll spare all of my time for you, Mr. Kim. Please teach me well.”
---
“And then, you’ll have to add this side with this… Yifan, are you even listening right now?” Joonmyeon stopped his tutoring and looked at Yifan, who hadn’t done anything for the past 30 minutes other than staring at Joonmyeon and smiling at him. “I don’t have time for you to slack off, I even moved the council meeting just because Mr. Lee asked me to!”
Yifan raised both of his hands, as if surrendering. “Don’t blame me you look so good I could stare at you for the whole day.” Joonmyeon’s expression was borderline shy and disgusted at the same time after hearing Yifan’s words, if that expression even existed at the first place. An idea popped out inside Yifan’s head.
“How about we take the tutoring to a restaurant?” Yifan suggested, “I’m hungry so I can’t focus well.”
“We just ate our lunch two and a half hours ago, Yifan.” Joonmyeon reasoned out, trying to get himself out of the suggestion.
Yifan shrugged, “Guess I have a fast metabolism. And I just ran 30 laps!! I have every right to be hungry.” Joonmyeon was still not answering his idea to grab some lunch together, but Yifan was not the type to give up fast. “You weren’t even done 20 laps, don’t lie I could see you running from the class window and I counted. Only 17 laps.”
“Awww, you care so much for me, don't you?”
“No.” Joonmyeon deadpanned, “Just because probably I will have something to report you on to Mr. Lee. So maybe he will make you clean all of the bathrooms. One of the school’s janitor is sick so we could use some help.”
Yifan pouted, “Why are you so against it? It’s not like it’s a date or something. Though I won’t mind if we call it a date.”
“I didn’t think like that!!” Joonmyeon quickly retorted and from the pink on his cheeks Yifan knew that Joonmyeon probably thought just like what he guessed. Yifan felt himself giddy at the possibility. He missed his playful banter with Joonmyeon like this.
“So… why then? I’m trying here. I want to focus, then I need to eat something first.”
Feeling cornered, Joonmyeon finally gave up. He closed down the books and put them inside his bag. He sighed before asking Yifan, “Where do you want to eat?”
Yifan’s eyes lighted up at the question, already screaming in joy inside. “How about Samgyetang? That’s your favorite, right? I know a good place near here. Come on!” Yifan reached out for Joonmyeon’s hand to pull him in step with him, ignoring the soft mutter of Joonmyeon about how did Yifan even know his favorite food at the first place?!
PART 2
Pairing: Kris/Suho
Side Pairing/s : none
Rating: PG-15
Word Count: 12k-ish
Warning/s: Character death
Summary: "Maybe in some parallel universe, we are still together, and so very happy." - Anonymous
Notes (Optional): Thank you for the prompter for the brilliant prompt. This prompt challenged me and I hoped the result of countless sleepless night is worth it. I hope you like it prompter-nim and also readers (esp krisho shipper<3)! Thank you so much for LS and J for always being there, listening to my worries about this fic and also always helping whenever needed. Xoxo all. Crossposted from suhoneyfest!!
[December, 2016]
“Why you are here? Do you have something to tell me?” The man before Yifan asks, leaning forward in his sofa, trying to appear more approachable. Yifan sits still, with his cup of tea in hands. The cup is still full but the steam has been already gone a few minutes ago. The tea starts to cool down but the cup is still warm enough for him to wrap his hands around it.
Instead of answering, he glances around the room, noticing the familiar things to his eyes. Old cuckoo clock besides the windowsill, book shelves filled with dusty books that he can’t imagine reading, the other had always been the smart one out of the two of them. Rows of Star Wars merchandise hanging on one side of the wall, somehow unmatched with the whole professional ambience of the room.
Yifan smiles, even in this life he’s not different.
The man takes notice of his smile, “Excuse me, sir? Mr. Wu Yifan, right? Mind if I call you Yifan?”
At the sound of his name rolling from the man’s tongue, Yifan shuts his eyes. Breath in, breath out. Calm down, Yifan…
Yifan lets out a breath that he didn’t know he was holding, trying to compose himself from the sudden memories flooding through his mind. “No, I don’t mind.”
“And yes, maybe I have something to tell you.”
Seemingly glad with the answer, the man immediately jolts down some notes on the paper. Yifan takes a look at the man before him. Dressed in crisp white shirt tucked inside black pants. The navy blue blazer and brown coat are hanging on a hanger beside the door. His tie is slightly loose, and Yifan has to fight down the urge to reach out and fix it like he used to, reminding himself that he doesn’t know him personally in this life, that they merely have a psychiatrist-patient relationship. The man runs a hand through his styled hair, leaving it a little bit tousled but still looking acceptable for this formal setting.
“What is it?” the man asks. Yifan doesn’t know whether it is a pure curiosity or merely just a practiced act to appear more trustworthy since he would be obtaining information from Yifan that the he would be needing to heal you, just like how the advertisement stated.
Faint white smoke comes out from Yifan’s mouth as he breathes. The air is starting to get colder by the end of the year. The man moves to the heater, turning it a degree higher. “I don’t think you will believe me,” Yifan answers. Or you will be scared of me after this, he said to himself.
“You can try” he says, bright gummy smile paints his face. “I’m here for listening to you, not judging you by your story. Aren’t I?” he adds, putting away the clip board on the table.
“Should I?”
The man says nothing, just keeps smiling at him.
“The story started 12 months ago on January...”
[January, 2015]
A nudge in his hips. Yifan only hummed in response, but his eyes never leaving the book he is holding. Not receiving the response he expected, he felt another nudge on his ribs, finger digging in too deep to cause a little pain. Nonetheless, Yifan still didn’t budge.
“Yifaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnn” A whine was heard, a sign that the person behind the nudging and poking gave up. Yifan chuckled as he took off his glasses, putting it aside at the bedside table along with his book. He loved teasing the other like this.
“May I help you,Your Majesty?”
Joonmyeon rolled over closer once Yifan’s attention was on him, smiling in victory. It was the usual lazy Sunday morning, the clock still shows that it was seven past thirty and they hadn’t made it out of bed ever since they woke up an hour ago. Moments like this is what Yifan always enjoys. When the sun comes streaming into the room and illuminating the golden dust flying on top of Joonmyeon’s head like a crown, making him looking like the little prince just like the movie they like to watch. When all he could feel is the feeling of skin with skin as they tangled their legs under the blanket, bare but warm. When Joonmyeon was playing with his fingers to get his attention and also because it was one of his favorite things in the world.
“I didn’t know you were the type who gets into some kinky shit like slave/prince but well it’s worth a try sometimes. I think it’s pretty hot. But actually, I thought you were more into like…”
“Joonmyeon..” Yifan called warningly, putting a halt to Joonmyeon’s not so innocent rambling because it was still so early in the morning. And the fact that Yifan’s ears were turning red from embarrassment was also one of the reasons.
The other sat up, grinning sheepishly. At least he wasn’t making fun of Yifan’s embarrassment. Despite the people assumption that Yifan probably would be the one who was more forward in the bed department, Joonmyeon was way more imaginative and frank with his thoughts.
“I’m hungry,” Joonmyeon rubbed his stomach, “Let’s have breakfast.”
The sound of Yifan’s stomach rumble filled in before the man can even respond. Well, that was pretty much decided then. “Breakfast, it is.”
“How about having breakfast outside? It’s been a while and there’s this new place I want to try?” Joonmyeon suggested as they make their way to the bathroom to get ready. Not forgetting to slap Yifan’s ass as he walked past through him.
Sunday morning was always filled with a playful Joonmyeon.
“Anything that pleases you, Your Majesty.”
The sky was bright blue, sun wasn’t high up in the sky yet and the clouds made a perfect shade for people to hide. A perfect day to be outside, and Yifan thought there’s no better way to start a morning. Joonmyeon was happily singing along with the song playing on the radio and his happiness was affecting Yifan.
“You look so bright today, did you have a good sleep last night?” Yifan looked at Joonmyeon at his side, one hand reaching out to grab the latter’s hand to thread their fingers together. They still had sixty seconds before the traffic light changes from red to green, so Yifan leaned forward to land a peck on Joonmyeon’s lips.
“You look so cute this morning, I can’t help it.” He answered when Joonmyeon asked why did he kiss him out of nowhere. He only smiled to himself when he heard Joonmyeon muttering to himself that he’s not cute but the pink tint on his cheeks was clearly stating otherwise.
But the happiness didn’t last long.
It happened so fast, one second Yifan was stepping on the gas because the light was already changed to green, one second later he heard Joonmyeon screaming and before he could ask what happened, he felt something heavy pushing him harshly from his side. His head met the car window with a loud bang.
Everything turned black after that.
---
His head was pounding when he came into consciousness. Yifan tried to move his arm, but his movement was restrained by something that was pulling on his neck. His entire body was aching and he felt slightly nauseous. The room was in silence beside the constant beep sound from machine somewhere around him.
“Joonmyeon?” He croaked out, hoping that Joonmyeon was not far from him so the other can hear him calling. No answer.
“Joonmyeon? Are you okay?” Yifan tried again, eyes still closed because he was afraid the pain inside his head would intensify if he opened his eyes. Yifan could sense the smell of antiseptics wafting in the air. He opened his eyes slightly to see that he was indeed, wearing a hospital gown. There was a blanket with the hospital name printed in front on his lap. The thing that restrained his arms movement before turned out to be an arm sling for his bandaged arm.
Seeing that, suddenly the memories were all coming back to him. The Sunday morning. The plan to have a breakfast outside. The singing in the car. Joonmyeon’s scream.
Joonmyeon.
“Ah, Yifan. You’re awake?” A familiar voice registered to his brain and Yifan opened both of his eyes slightly, slowly getting used to the lights. The pain was bearable for now, at least. The voice’s owner was Kyungsoo, Junmyeon’s best friend, who was working as a neurosurgeon at the very hospital Yifan is staying and teaching at universities. The said man was now walking to the bedside, a plastic of 7/11 in his hold. “I just came back from the minimarket below to grab some food. Would you like some?”
“I..” Yifan tried to say something, but his throat was too dry. Kyungsoo sensed it immediately and retrieved a glass of water from the bedside table. The feeling of warm water dampened the scratchy feeling inside his throat and he thanked Kyungsoo for it.
“Where’s Joonmyeon?”
Kyungsoo stiffened at the question, eyes avoiding Yifan in turn to just looking at his fingers. He’s doing that, Yifan noticed. The fingers pulling just like when he’s nervous. “Kyungsoo, what happened? I remember the crash. What happened to Joonmyeon?”
“KYUNGSOO!” Yifan shouted when Kyungsoo kept being silent and avoiding his gaze. His head kept playing the worst scenario but his heart doesnt want to believe it.
Kyungsoo finally looked up, his eyes watery. No, no, no, it’s not happening.
“He’s gone, Yifan.”
---
Yifan leaned his body on the leather seat, looking past the people outside. Young and old. Girls and boys. Husbands and wives. Lovers and friends. He could picture himself with Junmyeon, just like them, if you asked him a few days before. Strolling around the neighborhood, hand-in-hand, smiling at each other just because one of them gets ice cream on the face.
For now, he didn’t think he could imagine much. The only thing inside his mind these days was getting through each day without thinking about following Joonmyeon to the other side of the world.
“He was still alive when they brought you two in.” Kyungsoo started, eyeing Yifan for any response. “But he got the most impact because the truck was coming from his side, and he was leaning his head on the window. The hemorrhage inside his head turned out to be more severe than we expected it to be.”
He sighed as the scenery outside changed from the vast, buzzing city and skyscrapers to green fields, trees and low fences. The trees swayed as the wind brushed harshly past them, tipping them over.
Just in time, the sky was quickly turning from blue to grey, adding to the mourning of the two man inside the car. He heard Kyungsoo asking for an umbrella to borrow from the taxi driver, voice muffled because of the harsh pattering of raindrops slowly decorating the window. His black suit felt so constricting as he found himself struggling to breath as the second passed.
Is this rain your tears that you shed from heaven, Joonmyeon-ah?
Before knowing, he heard the distant sound of Kyungsoo telling the driver to stop, and Yifan knew they were there. Yifan simply tilted his head in acknowledgement when Kyungsoo called for him. “Wait a minute, I’ll get the umbrella.” Kyungsoo said before going out quickly to grab an umbrella on the trunk. Usually Yifan didn’t really like to be taken care like this, but he let himself, just this time.
As they made their way to the place on the cobblestone pathway, the rain had calmed down a bit. Yifan walked carefully beside Kyungsoo, eyes set on the group of people already not so far from them, dressed in the same all black attire as him. A black coffin is placed nicely right beside the group, with Joonmyeon’s favorite flowers adorning the sides. They look up when they heard steps getting closer, and Yifan nodded at them, as acknowledgement and also thank you. He wanted to say it directly, but he couldn’t trust his words right now.
He recognized Jongin, the teenager from the daycare Joonmyeon worked at before. Beside him was Sehun, Joonmyeon’s junior at work that he thought as his own son. He also spotted Baekhyun and Chanyeol too, they used to have routine get-together for dinner when they were still neighbors before, the four of them. But Baekhyun and Chanyeol had to move out of the city because Chanyeol got promoted. Yifan sent them a small smile for coming all the way here from Busan. There were some others too, Yifan recognizes them as work friends, mutual friends of them or some senior high school friends.
Yifan found it inside himself feeling slightly relieved. Joonmyeon’s departure was surrounded by all of the people who loved him, and Yifan could’t ask for more. He made his way to stand between Joonmyeon’s parents and his mother, he pulled his mom closer to him.
“Today, we are all gathered, for the funeral of our family, our best friend, and Yifan’s husband, Kim Junmyeon……”
[December, 2016]
“I’m so sorry for your loss…” The man says, trying to pass his empathy. Yifan offers him a small smile, “It’s okay, I’ve found a way to cope.”
“Really?” The man raises his eyebrows, eyes gleaming with interest. “How?”
[April, 2016]
Yifan turned around in the bed again for the umpteenth time that night. It was late and he had work tomorrow, but sleep wouldn’t come easily to him, just like how it was for the past two months. The slow ticking of the clock was the only one keeping him company at night. Facing Joonmyeon’s side of the bed, it felt cold to the touch. A reminder that it had been a while since it was occupied by someone. The smell of Joonmyeon’s fresh baby soap still lingered, even though it was getting more faint as the days pass. Yifan wished he could seal it in a can and cherish it for the rest of his life.
Recalling Joonmyeon was agonizing, remembering all of the things they did and talked at the very bed, and how they revealed their most naked selves on the very bed. Literally and figuratively. The same place where Yifan slipped that ring on Joonmyeon’s ring finger and asked him to be the love of his life, the rock of their little future family on that night. And the very same place where Joonmyeon said yes. His happiness was always contagious, his smile was always addicting. Nobody who saw him wouldn’t catch a smile on their faces too. Yifan remembered that he couldn’t keep his jealousy in check because of the growing fans of his boyfriend; both boys and girls.
A tear slipped out of the corner of his eyes, just when he thought that he couldn’t shed any more tears. The tears slid down past his cheek and seeped through the bedsheets below, joining the other dark patches that he formed before. He reached out a hand to Joonmyeon’s pillow, the place where his head usually lays. His hand hanged in the air, and he moved it. Up and down, up and down, caressing the invisible soft auburn hair beneath his fingers. The same gesture usually woke Joonmyeon up from his sleep, being the light sleeper that he was. He would always ask why Yifan is not asleep yet, chiding him softly about how unhealthy his sleeping pattern was.
Yifan choked down a sob, God, he misses him so much, it hurts. Yifan shut his eyes tightly, wishing inside his heart that these past two months were all just a dream. And when he opened his eyes he would see Joonmyeon’s worried eyes peering down at him, telling him it was just a nightmare and nothing else. That he’s here for him and not going anywhere. And then he would shift closer to Yifan and he would sing that Chinese children lullaby he learned from Yifan’s mom to lull Yifan off to sleep.
Life was not that kind to him, he figured out. Because when he opened his eyes, the side of the bed was still empty.
Sleep didn’t come to Yifan at all that night.
---
“When was the last time you ate, Yifan?” Luhan asked as he placed the take out boxes on Yifan’s lap. Along with his chopsticks. Yifan shrugged, “This morning? I can’t quite remember.” Kyungsoo came out from the kitchen, bringing a tray with three glasses filled with water. He placed one in front of Yifan, “Eat well, okay?”
The three of them were huddled in Yifan’s living room. The TV was playing a romantic movie that Yifan couldn’t figure out what the title was, not the usual re-run of Star Wars or Hannibal because those two were Joonmyeon’s favorite. And Yifan was still not ready to watch them without breaking down. They ate silently, with Kyungsoo and Luhan trying to strike a decent conversation with Yifan. They keep getting shut down every time. In the end, they gave up and just focused on the food.
“How about your project, Kyungsoo? Is it going well?” Luhan broke the silence when the movie was done and the credits started to roll.
“It goes well, I think. Just one more percent?”
“But how will you try it though? Have you found a volunteer?” Luhan questioned, as he gathered the take out boxes and chopsticks to put in the dumpster. Kyungsoo shook his head, “Not exactly easy to find someone for doing a dimension travel, though.” Yifan’s ears perked up at the mention of ‘dimension travel’, an idea forming inside his head. Yifan hoped Kyungsoo will elaborate, but he didn’t.
Luhan nodded in agreement but then frowned as he saw Yifan’s still half-full take out box. “Yifan, eat some more, can you? You’re getting thinner, it’s unhealthy.” He pushed the box into Yifan’s hands again, which the latter pushed away. “I’m full, Luhan. It’s okay.” Luhan looked like he wanted to retort but the tell-tale of his pager stopped him.
“I have to go back, it’s my shift for the night.” He hugged Yifan and gave him supportive pats in the back, before scurrying to wear his shoes and out the door, leaving Kyungsoo and Yifan alone. Yifan decided to help Kyungsoo doing his dishes.
“So..” Yifan started, “What’s your research is about?”
The look in Kyungsoo’s face was almost funny, clearly he didn’t think Yifan will ask about his research. Yifan felt guilty eating him from the inside, seeing how his friends were taking care of him but he didn’t even pay attention to them that much.
“Just like I said, it’s some kind of dimension travel. To put it simple, I think. We believe that there is a thousand of parallel universes going at the same time as our universe right now. And for quite some time already, me and my team is doing this project to make a machine that will make us able to experience our parallel universe.”
“How do..this parallel universe works?”
Kyungsoo took some time to answer. “For example you have to choose between two things, yes or no. In this universe you choose yes, and you will fell the consequences of the decision you made. But another universe is made for the ‘you’ who chose no, and that ‘you’ will face the consequences of the decision he made. Or.. It can be a whole different universe entirely.”
Yifan placed the last plate at the drying rack, and tailed Kyungsoo back to the living room. “So… There is another universe out there, where Joonmyeon is still alive?”
The question seemed to catch Kyungsoo off-guard as he looksed at Yifan with careful eyes, wary. He might had sensed something already but not saying anything about it. “Yes…. Maybe you could say it like that.” Nobody said a word after that, as Yifan was busy with his own thought. Something akin with hope appeared inside him after hearing Kyungsoo’s answer.
“Kyungsoo, what do you say about me doing the dimension travel?”
[May, 2016]
“The answer is still no, Yifan.” Kyungsoo was about to slam the door on his face again but he was quick to prevent it. There was a battle of the one who wanted to close the door and the one who wanted to keep it open so he can explain himself. The sight probably was funny for outsiders, Kyungsoo being the stronger one despite having a smaller built, but Yifan had no time to think about that.
“Kyungsoo, Kyungsoo, please! Hear me first!” Yifan pleaded. Thankfully it worked, because Yifan was sure his shoulder was going to fall off if they kept doing their ‘door battle’ any longer. Kyungsoo opened the door, but standing right in front of it so Yifan wouldn’t be able to enter. “What now?”
“I miss him, Soo…” Yifan heard Kyungsoo sighed, “Don’t we all, Yifan?”
“It’s been two months, I need, need, need, to see him again. Photos are not enough Kyungsoo. This gaping hole inside me needs him, needs his presence to heal.” Yifan searched for Kyungsoo’s eyes, the latter was avoiding his because of trying to hold back his tears. Yifan understood, Kyungsoo was also Joonmyeon’s best friend, been friends since they were in elementary school, way before Yifan and Joonmyeon met each other. The pain Kyungsoo was feeling because of the loss is the same, if not bigger.
“No, Yifan. My answer is still no. It is too dangerous and me and my team even considered on another way--”
“I’m ready to take any consequences, Soo. I don’t care what it will take, I’m ready.” Yifan pleaded some more, he himself was on the verge of crying. “It’s a win-win situation for me, huh? If something really goes wrong, and I… die…” Yifan had no chance to finish his sentence because a loud slap was given on his right cheek.
“HOW DARE YOU SAID THAT!” Kyungsoo shouted, his voice gruff and full with anger. His face was so red and looked much in pain, hurting. “Do you think Joonmyeon will forgive me if I let anything happens to you? Do you think I can live with that?!”
“We once joked we would take care of the other’s wife, or husband when one of us happens to pass away first” Kyungsoo looked up to look Yifan straight in the eyes, “And that happened. And I’m going to do just like how he asked.”
Yifan knew he should’ve stopped after hearing that and tried again later, but desperation and longing were blinding him right now. He lowered himself down on both of his knees, giving a complete mercy of himself to the man in front of him. Throwing his pride away to beg for Kyungsoo’s help. “Kyungsoo… Please.. This is my last resort… I feel like dying everyday, I need this, Soo.. I need this… I’ll take all the consequences. Heck, I’ll even sign a letter confirming that I’m doing this on my will and you won’t be held responsible if anything happens to me. Just think this as a way to prevent me from hurting myself, at least I will be under your watch in this, right?”
They stayed in silence for a while after that, “Give me a few days to think. I’ll get it back to you on the weekend.”
---
Saturday came too slow for Yifan’s liking. Kyungsoo didn’t even message or call him during the week, and opted to avoid him if they happened to cross pathways. Yifan was growing even more desperate, he didn’t know what he will do if Kyungsoo says no again this time. Yifan was about to go for a nap when his phone rang, signaling a text coming in.
Come to my house. Right now.- Kyungsoo
He appeared in front of Kyungsoo’s door in record time, 10 minutes faster than how it usually was. Kyungsoo opened the door even before he knocked, “We’re doing it. But you have to follow the rules.”
Kyungsoo let him in, closing the door tightly and making sure all the lock was on their place. He looked rather nervous today, Yifan noticed. But he didn’t say anything and just followed Kyungsoo to his basement. Kyungsoo typed some numbers into the panel beside the door, a sound of confirmation followed and the door opened.The said basement was no longer the basement Yifan remembered it to be, with boxes and old things here and there. There was a big chair in the middle of the room, wires with different colors hanging around it. Kyungsoo led them to the panel right beside the chair, only higher in position but facing directly to the chair.
“You don’t have to do anything other than sit down, there.” Kyungsoo pointed at the chair. “It won’t be painful, but there will be a lot of wires that I will put on you. For your vital signs, for your ECG, for your EEG and soon.”
To make it easy to explain, Kyungsoo grabbed for a paper and put in on the table where they both can see. He drew two stick figures. “Here,” he pointed at the stick figures on the right, “Is you. You in March 2016. The now you. And this one,” he pointed to another stick figures on the left, “Is the other universe “you”. You see that on the other universe, they have a body but with a different mind as yours. Thus, we won’t transport your March 2016 body there, but only your soul.”
“Here is the dangerous part. I’ll be putting you on a REM-stage. And then transfer your soul to the other universe. I can’t promise you would find Joonmyeon immediately, but I’m sure he’s somewhere there. During this, you have to be aware that your mind is not on it’s own universe, not in it’s own place. You can’t be there for too long, so I’ll have to wake you up. To wake you up, I have to pull you out of the REM stage, it’s easy. But, if you let yourself in too deep, if you let your sleep into the stage, 3 or 4, or in other words, deep sleep, it’ll be hard for me to pull you back.”
“And if that happens and I couldn’t pull you back..” Kyungsoo’s words hung in the air, hesitancy is clear in his form. Yifan nudges him, “What?”
“Both of yourself will die. In this universe, and in that universe. Your soul will be suspended in the 4th dimension, because you are deemed to not fit in both of the universes. Your soul won’t be able to descend to the heaven either because of it.”
Yifan was silent after the explanation, letting all the information get into his brain and process themselves. He felt himself almost back up after Kyungsoo said that he could die in this experiment, but Kyungsoo already stated before that there will be consequences in this and he himself said that he’s willing to go through it.
“How? You still have time to back out from this. Which I strongly suggest you too.”
He was already here. He knew he just has to sit down on that chair and he will meet Joonmyeon. Well, there was no guarantee but he was sure he can do something to make it possible. Just the thought of seeing that smile in Joonmyeon again one more time…. Yifan smiled at the thought.
See you soon, Kim Joonmyeon.
“Sorry to disappoint you Soo, but I’m not backing out.”
[December, 2016
“That...machine. Really exists in this world?” The man looks up from his note to look at Yifan. Yifan can feel that he’s curious, but also sense a bit of unsureness and doubt. He can’t blame the man if he’s questioning his story right now.
“I guess Kyungsoo is that genius afterall.”
[May, 2016]
It felt just like falling asleep, like getting into a deep sleep. Yifan almost thought that Kyungsoo was lying about this whole experiment but it was highly unlikely. He dismissed the thought before it even resurfaced quickly. He didn’t feel anything, not even those dizzy sensation or anything like those in sci-fi movie shows.
Did this mean the experiment fail?
There was a sudden loud noise of a door being opened and it startled Yifan. He opened his eyes to see what it was and wanting to ask Kyungsoo what’s wrong, but instead of the sight of Kyungsoo’s underground laboratory, he’s met with the sight of unfamiliar bedroom. He looked around the room and noticed that there was another bed not far from him, and judging from the mess he could tell the occupant is a male. The room was not big but enough to fit in two beds, tables and also some drawers.
Is it some kind of dorm? Yifan guessed. But clearly not college dorms, because he couldn’t see any books inside the room besides some magazines and Korean Learning books. Deep in his thoughts, he didn’t realize someone coming out from the bathroom.
“Oh, Kris! You woke up already?” A familiar voice greeted him and when he looked to the voice direction, it’s Luhan standing in front of the door, busy getting in arms inside a jacket. He looked ready to go out.
“Luhan? What are you doing here?”
Luhan looked at him with a funny expresion on his face, “I’m...here because this is also my room? What are you talking about, you must’ve been drinking again last night. Don’t let the manager hyung knows or you’ll be dead.” Luhan threw a shirt and a jacket in his direction, Yifan’s hands moved in reflex to catch it. “Now, dress yourself. We have practice in a 1 hour.”
“Practice?”
“God, Yifan! How much did you drink last night? Come on! Get your body moving because I want to grab some breakfast on the way to the SM building. Let’s hope your mind will be sober enough when we get there.”
---
Luhan couldn’t stop talking on the way to the restaurant, pointing out things here and there. He might had said something about ‘EXO’ and also ‘Leader’ and also upcoming schedule he and some others will have to attend tonight. Yifan was starting to get a grasp about what kind of universe he was in, and what was him in this universe but to make sure, he borrowed Luhan’s phone (he made up reasons about his phone being left in the dorm when he actually had no idea where his phone was) and went into Naver to search for ‘EXO’.
The article at the top pretty much confirmed his guess. He was Kris, a part of a South Korean-Chinese boy group EXO. He also figured out that he’s the leader of the group’s subgroup, EXO-M. There were another three Chinese members in the group, and apparently Luhan was also one of them. His fingers stopped scrolling when he saw one name on the list of band members..
“Kim Junmyeon?” He didn’t notice he said it out loud until Luhan nudged him with his foot, “Why? Junmyeon, why? Is he calling?”
“What? No, no.” Yifan quickly answered before Luhan snatched his phone back. He still needed it to find out about this Kim Joonmyeon. His heart starting to beat faster. Is it him, is it him? After three months? Three months of not seeing Joonmyeon’s face, three months of not hearing his voice, three months without any kind of physical contact with him.
It’s like seeing a light on the end of the tunnel.
“Are you done yet? Let’s go!”
---
Nothing had prepared Yifan for this. After getting inside the room, his eyes landed on the boy dressed in printed animation t-shirt sitting not far from the mirror across him. Nothing prepared him from the smile that he received when the boy looked up , and greeted him. Nothing prepared him when the boy stood up and walked towards him, touching his arms gently and telling him that they would have to talk about upcoming schedule in China.
Yifan’s body reacted by itself and nobody can stop him when he wrapped his arms around the boy’s body, burying his head on the crook of the boy’s neck to inhale his scent because the scent on his pillow was starting to fade. To run his fingers between the locks of the boy’s hair because he was starting to forget how soft it felt under his fingertips. He didn’t even realize he cried and only did when Joonmyeon started to ask about it because he felt his shirt getting damp.
He pulled himself back to take a look at Joonmyeon’s face, palms on both side of the smaller’s face just because Yifan can’t believe it. Joonmyeon, in all flesh and blood, standing in front of him. Standing in front of him in his hold.
“Yifan, are you okay?” Joonmyeon asked, eyebrows taut together in concern. And Yifan wanted to lean down and kiss the wrinkle forming in Joonmyeon’s forehead away.
“Okay? I’m beyond okay, Joonmyeon.” Yifan answered, voice thin because of crying. He couldn’t care less about the fact that Joonmyeon (and also the other guys) had no idea why he was like this and they might be confused as hell, he could explain it later. He was just.. happy. He wanted to enjoy this as much as he can.
”I just--”
Yifan didn’t get to finish his sentence when there were two man coming inside the room, looking around to find Yifan hugging Joonmyeon and the other ten members frozen in their place because of the scene they just witnessed. “What happened here? Come on! Let’s get into practice!” The choreographer’s voice boomed inside the room, waking all of the members from their trance. Not wanting to make the choreographer mad, they quickly went into their positions.
“Yifan, are you okay?” Joonmyeon repeated himself, urgency behind his words because they have to start their practice soon. Yifan was silent, still staring at Joonmyeon.
He can’t believe it…
“YIFAN! JOONMYEON! If you guys keep doing this then I’ll be giving you guys four more hours of practice!!” It was the manager’s turn to shout from the other side of the room. Hearing the threat, Joonmyeon quickly detached himself from Yifan. Yifan frowned at the action. “We’ll talk about this later, okay? I don’t want both of us to get into trouble.” Yifan wanted to stop him, but a look from Joonmyeon stopped him and he quickly adjusted. Just like Joonmyeon said, he himself didn’t want them to get int trouble.
It turned out the four more hours of practice was clearly needed for Yifan because he couldn’t stop messing up with the choreography, he couldn’t keep his eyes off of Joonmyeon all the time. So the manager told him to stay behind while the others go home and get some rest. It was actually a bit dissapointing to Yifan to see Joonmyeon going out of the room with the others and left him alone, not even giving him a pat in the back like the others for encouragement.
Yifan laid down on the hardwood floor, starring at the ceiling. His breath were coming out in pants, and he could feel his t-shirt sticks to his back. Out of all the universe out there, how could be this is where he ended up at? He was clearly happy, no scratch that, he’s beyond happy he got to see Joonmyeon again. But the dancing part was exhausting him. Yifan decided to start giving those boybands more appreciation after this.
“You won’t get any choreography done if you keep being lazy like that.” Someone said suddenly before followed by a light chuckle. Yifan looked around to see Joonmyeon standing on the door, leaning his body on the door frame with a mini-market plastic bag on one hand. “I brought food.”
“Do you want to talk about…” Joonmyeon started as he poured the seasoning inside his ramyeon cup, “..about what happened? Why were you…”
“Have you ever missed someone so much, Joonmyeon?” Yifan asked back, his ramyeon cup untouched because he didn’t bother with it. His eyes had been on Joonmyeon all the time Joonmyeon was in the room. He noticed the slight blushes Joonmyeon was sporting because of his intense stare, but he didn’t point it that out. He didn’t want Joonmyeon to hide it because of embarrassment, that’s something that clearly Joonmyeon liked to do.
“I think.. I have.” Joonmyeon answered in between his intake of hot noodles. Some of the broth made stain on the corner of his lips, and Yifan took it upon himself to clean it himself with his thumb before Joonmyeon started searching for a tissue. “You’re still the same, getting food all over yourself when you’re hungry.” Yifan said, smiling fondly.
If his face was pink before, it was flaming red right now because of Yifan’s action. Yifan found it so endearingly cute. His soft white skin blends together well with the red flushes. “So, what if I’ve missed someone too much, before? Are you, now?”
Yifan nodded, sighing happily as he placed his head on his arm that was perched on one knee. “I am, now. But I’m happy, I finally get to meet the person I miss the most. Right now, sitting in front of me.”
“Eng?” Joonmyeon looked up from the rim of his ramyeon cup, “Did we just meet jahbfiubefinsiomfoibg?”
“What, Joonmyeon? I can’t hear you well.”
“Did we jenfiojh hjwebfwjn ebfiwjnfenw?”
Yifan leaned forward, hoping to hear Joonmyeon better. “What, Joonmyeon?”
Just then, his sight was starting to get blurry. And he could hear Joonmyeon saying something again, but Yifan couldn’t quite catch it because the voice sounded so distant right now. Before he could question anything, this sight went black entirely.
---
When he woke up, he was met by the the sight of Kyungsoo’s worried face. His eyes were still adjusting to the lights and his mind was still kind of fuzzy, but he could hear Kyungsoo sighing in relief, muttering “Thank God he wakes up” under his breath.
“How’s Joonmyeon?” Kyungsoo asked when Yifan was awake enough to sit down.
Yifan didn’t say anything, but the smile on his face was an answer enough.
[June, 2016]
The next time he woke up, the first thing he noticed was the pain on his lower back. It was the kind of pain that appears when you sleep in a wrong position for a long time. Wrong position in this one means sitting with your upper body slumping forward, Yifan remembered this kind of pain happened a lot when he was still in Junior High, with his rate of sleeping in class was two classes out of five classes in a day. The room was silent other than the light giggles from his left and right but he wasn’t quite sure about why, or at what.
“Have a nice nap, Mr. Wu?” someone asked but Yifan couldn’t see his face from his position on the table. He straightened his body slowly, groaning when he felt his spine getting back into their place one by one again. There was someone poking him at the ribs and when he turned his head, he saw Sehun looking at him.
“Sehun? What?” Yifan yawned. Instead of answering, Sehun only fidgeted more on his seat, his eyes moving to one side, trying to give Yifan signals. Look at the front, he mouthed. Not knowing what happened, Yifan obeyed Sehun and looked at the front.
“I asked, did you have a nice nap, Mr. Wu?” an old man, who seemed to be a math teacher (Yifan peeks at the white board full with numbers and y, x.. in front) was now standing in front of his table, smiling oh so sweetly at him.
Oh shit.
“Uh, no I didn-- I’m sorry sir, I--” Yifan’s mind was racing to find something to say, some excuse or, or, or.. just anything!
“You might need some refreshment. How about…. 30 laps around the school field?”
---
Yifan felt his legs started to give up at the 15th lap, but he kept on going. He used to be strong at keeping his performance on two hours basketball practice but he really felt like he was going to die this time. It was 15 minutes to the end of the school hours, basically. If he’s lucky, he could go slow and flee to find Joonmyeon (he didn’t forget his purpose here, of course) when no one noticed once the school bell rings. Probaby Joonmyeon was in this school too, a teacher, or maybe a student.
It was his 19th lap when the school bell rang and Yifan couldn’t take it anymore. Why did he keep ending up in a universe where he needs to use his body? He threw himself on the top of green bed of grass, not caring about his white button-up uniform and tried to catch his breath. The sun was high up in the sky, which was no help in Yifan’s situation, only making it even worse. He heard the tell-tale sound of shoes, a sign that classes were already dismissed. But Yifan didn’t even had the energy to sit down right now, let alone walking up three set of stairs to his class and grabs his bag.
He was starting to get dizzy, but not the kind of dizzy he felt before he blacked out in his last dimension travel. The dizzy that someone felt when he’s about to pass out. Or dies? How funny it would be if he dies right there right then out of dehydration when he hadn’t even met Joonmyeon.
“You’ll get dehydration if you keep laying there.” A familiar voice greeted him and as if there was an energy shot given to him, Yifan quickly sat up and looked up to the voice’s owner, face partly hidden because he has his back to the sun. But Yifan coukd see the name tag on his school blazer clearly. Just the name he wanted to see. The owner of the voice had his bag in one hand, and his free hand was holding a book that just screamed knowledge all over. “Mr. Lee asked me to tutor you for the lesson you missed because, you know..” He tsk’d, “..Sleeping in class. Which is irresponsible.”
Heaven was clearly on his side, he didn’t even need to search and yet here he is. The love of his life standing right in front of him once again.
“Well, it’s not my fault they set the math lesson as the last subject of the day.” Yifan stood up, grinning at Junmyeon who was making an annoyed face. Gosh, it felt like going back to high school all over again. Messing up with someone just because you like them and when teasing is the way to show affection for sappy delinquent like Yifan.
Junmyeon tsk’d again, and threw his backpack at him. “Can we start the tutoring now?”
“Hmmm…” Yifan pretended to think hard, just to see Junmyeon rolling his eyes at him. “I can! I’ll spare all of my time for you, Mr. Kim. Please teach me well.”
---
“And then, you’ll have to add this side with this… Yifan, are you even listening right now?” Joonmyeon stopped his tutoring and looked at Yifan, who hadn’t done anything for the past 30 minutes other than staring at Joonmyeon and smiling at him. “I don’t have time for you to slack off, I even moved the council meeting just because Mr. Lee asked me to!”
Yifan raised both of his hands, as if surrendering. “Don’t blame me you look so good I could stare at you for the whole day.” Joonmyeon’s expression was borderline shy and disgusted at the same time after hearing Yifan’s words, if that expression even existed at the first place. An idea popped out inside Yifan’s head.
“How about we take the tutoring to a restaurant?” Yifan suggested, “I’m hungry so I can’t focus well.”
“We just ate our lunch two and a half hours ago, Yifan.” Joonmyeon reasoned out, trying to get himself out of the suggestion.
Yifan shrugged, “Guess I have a fast metabolism. And I just ran 30 laps!! I have every right to be hungry.” Joonmyeon was still not answering his idea to grab some lunch together, but Yifan was not the type to give up fast. “You weren’t even done 20 laps, don’t lie I could see you running from the class window and I counted. Only 17 laps.”
“Awww, you care so much for me, don't you?”
“No.” Joonmyeon deadpanned, “Just because probably I will have something to report you on to Mr. Lee. So maybe he will make you clean all of the bathrooms. One of the school’s janitor is sick so we could use some help.”
Yifan pouted, “Why are you so against it? It’s not like it’s a date or something. Though I won’t mind if we call it a date.”
“I didn’t think like that!!” Joonmyeon quickly retorted and from the pink on his cheeks Yifan knew that Joonmyeon probably thought just like what he guessed. Yifan felt himself giddy at the possibility. He missed his playful banter with Joonmyeon like this.
“So… why then? I’m trying here. I want to focus, then I need to eat something first.”
Feeling cornered, Joonmyeon finally gave up. He closed down the books and put them inside his bag. He sighed before asking Yifan, “Where do you want to eat?”
Yifan’s eyes lighted up at the question, already screaming in joy inside. “How about Samgyetang? That’s your favorite, right? I know a good place near here. Come on!” Yifan reached out for Joonmyeon’s hand to pull him in step with him, ignoring the soft mutter of Joonmyeon about how did Yifan even know his favorite food at the first place?!
PART 2