3-2-1
Title: 3-2-1
Pairing/Character(s): Nichkhun/Wooyoung
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Wooyoung knows he and Nichkhun are meant to be. He knows it.
A/N: All my fics are so mediocre fml.
It's been six months. Six months since Wooyoung confessed to Nichkhun. Six months since Nichkhun rejected him.
"Are you crazy? We're like brothers. And besides, I'm not gay."
Wooyoung thinks it's probably the most painful thing he's ever felt in his life, physical or emotional, to hear those words spoken to him. He only hopes that he dies in a fatal car accident soon, because there's no way he can face Nichkhun now.
.
It's been five months. Five months since the beginning of Wooyoung's downward spiral. Five months since the beginning of Nichkhun's transcendent in society.
"She is so goddamn sexy--especially when she's sucking me off in my dressing room."
Thankfully, it hasn't been as awkward as he imagined, but he can't say the same for how much it still hurts him. It's incredible to Wooyoung just how much his heart wants to drill through his chest and jump into the burning briquettes before him as he pretends he's too busy barbecuing to eavesdrop on Nichkhun and Taecyeon. He also pretends it's the smoke that's making his eyes water.
.
It's been four months. Four months since Nichkhun confronted Wooyoung out of (questionably genuine) concern. Four months since Nichkhun started fucking him out of (definitely genuine) pity.
"I-I know...I know I said I wasn't gay and all, but Wooyoung...if you want to...Would you be happier?"
"Hyung, this isn't what I meant. I don't want this."
As soon as Nichkhun peels himself out of Wooyoung's slick embrace, a wall of silence separates them again. And as soon as Nichkhun rushes out of his room, Wooyoung is left alone to kick himself for being pathetic enough to give in. As the faint sounds of the shower echo throughout the silent apartment, Wooyoung falls asleep to the thought of Nichkhun trying to scrub away the filth of their act.
.
It's been three months. Three months since Wooyoung realized he couldn't bring himself to fall out of love. Three months since Nichkhun decided he didn't mind it.
"Wooyoung, let's do it tonight."
"I thought you had a date with Victoria."
"I did, but she just cancelled on me. So do you want to?"
"I-I guess so..."
Wooyoung doesn't like to admit it, but it's becoming a routine now, a cycle of sex and heartbreak. Nichkhun often seeks him out to ask him for his body, and of course, Wooyoung is all too willing to give it. When they're together, Wooyoung thinks he could die happy, rolling and rocking against Nichkhun's body. But immediately afterwards, Wooyoung wants to sink into the creases of his stained creaky mattress and rot there. They don't tell anybody about what they're doing, so thankfully, Wooyoung doesn't have to undergo criticism from anybody (but himself). But every night, before he goes to sleep, Wooyoung wishes with every fiber in his body that Nichkhun isn't playing with him, that Nichkhun feels the same.
.
It's been two months. Two months since Wooyoung had started to lie to himself. Two months since Nichkhun started to play along.
"Wooyoung, I'm starving. Let's go out for some food."
"Like a date?"
"...Well, uh...Sure, whatever..."
Wooyoung has rewritten the memories in his mind. He and Nichkhun share mutual feelings. Love - is it love? It doesn't matter, it doesn't need to be named. Nichkhun knows something about Wooyoung has changed, but neither he or Wooyoung say anything about it. Nichkhun doesn't because he finds Wooyoung's behavior strangely intriguing. Wooyoung doesn't because he believes that to do so would ruin the pure and perfect synchronization of their (anything but pure and perfect) secret.
.
It's been one month. One month since Wooyoung's sudden breakdown. One month since Nichkhun began to avoid him completely.
"Nichkhun, are you going out again?"
"I have filming for We Got Married today, Wooyoung, you know that."
"Nichkhun, why, why are you - why do you go back to her? Why do you care about her so much?"
"Wooyoung, what are you talking about?"
"Are you blind? Can't you see what she's doing?! She's coming between us, Nichkhun - trying to separate us!"
Wooyoung's world is crumbling dangerously faster and faster as reality and fantasy become clearer to him. Nichkhun won't talk to him - won't even look at him - and the feelings from long ago of painful thundering in his chest return at full blast. The organ in his chest pounds with menacing desperation against his ribcage each time he catches a glimpse of Nichkhun in the studio (because Nichkhun has taken up shelter elsewhere to hide from him). While Wooyoung mentally battles with reality, Nichkhun devises a way to straighten things out, explain to Wooyoung that things aren't the way he thinks they are, haul him back to the real world and chain him there.
.
"Wooyoung, we aren't and never will be-"
"D-Don't say it."
"I have to. You're...You're going out of your mind, Wooyoung!"
"I'm not. I'm not...I'm not."
Wooyoung stops talking to Nichkhun, stops interacting with him entirely. Instead, he cements himself at the sides of the other members and seemingly ignores Nichkhun completely, as if Nichkhun had never existed in his world. Except he does. In fact, he's the only thing (that matters) that exists in Wooyoung's world. There is Junho, Chansung, Taecyeon, Junsu, JYP, the stage, dancing, singing, and fans, but Wooyoung filters everything out of his mind that isn't Nichkhun. It's only him and Nichkhun, whether Wooyoung's standing with Junsu on the other side of the stage from him or eating lunch on the opposite side of the practice room from him. Wooyoung believes with every glittering speck of his soul that they are meant to be together and waits silently for Nichkhun to realize it too. Because he knows - he knows - he's not crazy. He's not. He's not. He's not.
Pairing/Character(s): Nichkhun/Wooyoung
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Wooyoung knows he and Nichkhun are meant to be. He knows it.
A/N: All my fics are so mediocre fml.
It's been six months. Six months since Wooyoung confessed to Nichkhun. Six months since Nichkhun rejected him.
"Are you crazy? We're like brothers. And besides, I'm not gay."
Wooyoung thinks it's probably the most painful thing he's ever felt in his life, physical or emotional, to hear those words spoken to him. He only hopes that he dies in a fatal car accident soon, because there's no way he can face Nichkhun now.
.
It's been five months. Five months since the beginning of Wooyoung's downward spiral. Five months since the beginning of Nichkhun's transcendent in society.
"She is so goddamn sexy--especially when she's sucking me off in my dressing room."
Thankfully, it hasn't been as awkward as he imagined, but he can't say the same for how much it still hurts him. It's incredible to Wooyoung just how much his heart wants to drill through his chest and jump into the burning briquettes before him as he pretends he's too busy barbecuing to eavesdrop on Nichkhun and Taecyeon. He also pretends it's the smoke that's making his eyes water.
.
It's been four months. Four months since Nichkhun confronted Wooyoung out of (questionably genuine) concern. Four months since Nichkhun started fucking him out of (definitely genuine) pity.
"I-I know...I know I said I wasn't gay and all, but Wooyoung...if you want to...Would you be happier?"
"Hyung, this isn't what I meant. I don't want this."
As soon as Nichkhun peels himself out of Wooyoung's slick embrace, a wall of silence separates them again. And as soon as Nichkhun rushes out of his room, Wooyoung is left alone to kick himself for being pathetic enough to give in. As the faint sounds of the shower echo throughout the silent apartment, Wooyoung falls asleep to the thought of Nichkhun trying to scrub away the filth of their act.
.
It's been three months. Three months since Wooyoung realized he couldn't bring himself to fall out of love. Three months since Nichkhun decided he didn't mind it.
"Wooyoung, let's do it tonight."
"I thought you had a date with Victoria."
"I did, but she just cancelled on me. So do you want to?"
"I-I guess so..."
Wooyoung doesn't like to admit it, but it's becoming a routine now, a cycle of sex and heartbreak. Nichkhun often seeks him out to ask him for his body, and of course, Wooyoung is all too willing to give it. When they're together, Wooyoung thinks he could die happy, rolling and rocking against Nichkhun's body. But immediately afterwards, Wooyoung wants to sink into the creases of his stained creaky mattress and rot there. They don't tell anybody about what they're doing, so thankfully, Wooyoung doesn't have to undergo criticism from anybody (but himself). But every night, before he goes to sleep, Wooyoung wishes with every fiber in his body that Nichkhun isn't playing with him, that Nichkhun feels the same.
.
It's been two months. Two months since Wooyoung had started to lie to himself. Two months since Nichkhun started to play along.
"Wooyoung, I'm starving. Let's go out for some food."
"Like a date?"
"...Well, uh...Sure, whatever..."
Wooyoung has rewritten the memories in his mind. He and Nichkhun share mutual feelings. Love - is it love? It doesn't matter, it doesn't need to be named. Nichkhun knows something about Wooyoung has changed, but neither he or Wooyoung say anything about it. Nichkhun doesn't because he finds Wooyoung's behavior strangely intriguing. Wooyoung doesn't because he believes that to do so would ruin the pure and perfect synchronization of their (anything but pure and perfect) secret.
.
It's been one month. One month since Wooyoung's sudden breakdown. One month since Nichkhun began to avoid him completely.
"Nichkhun, are you going out again?"
"I have filming for We Got Married today, Wooyoung, you know that."
"Nichkhun, why, why are you - why do you go back to her? Why do you care about her so much?"
"Wooyoung, what are you talking about?"
"Are you blind? Can't you see what she's doing?! She's coming between us, Nichkhun - trying to separate us!"
Wooyoung's world is crumbling dangerously faster and faster as reality and fantasy become clearer to him. Nichkhun won't talk to him - won't even look at him - and the feelings from long ago of painful thundering in his chest return at full blast. The organ in his chest pounds with menacing desperation against his ribcage each time he catches a glimpse of Nichkhun in the studio (because Nichkhun has taken up shelter elsewhere to hide from him). While Wooyoung mentally battles with reality, Nichkhun devises a way to straighten things out, explain to Wooyoung that things aren't the way he thinks they are, haul him back to the real world and chain him there.
.
"Wooyoung, we aren't and never will be-"
"D-Don't say it."
"I have to. You're...You're going out of your mind, Wooyoung!"
"I'm not. I'm not...I'm not."
Wooyoung stops talking to Nichkhun, stops interacting with him entirely. Instead, he cements himself at the sides of the other members and seemingly ignores Nichkhun completely, as if Nichkhun had never existed in his world. Except he does. In fact, he's the only thing (that matters) that exists in Wooyoung's world. There is Junho, Chansung, Taecyeon, Junsu, JYP, the stage, dancing, singing, and fans, but Wooyoung filters everything out of his mind that isn't Nichkhun. It's only him and Nichkhun, whether Wooyoung's standing with Junsu on the other side of the stage from him or eating lunch on the opposite side of the practice room from him. Wooyoung believes with every glittering speck of his soul that they are meant to be together and waits silently for Nichkhun to realize it too. Because he knows - he knows - he's not crazy. He's not. He's not. He's not.