(Untitled)

[peppbrat]

Have you ever been the cause of something you could not control? You were the reason something really terrible happened, but you did nothing wrong. It is a terrible feeling and no matter how hard you work at getting over it, you can't. People still mention your name along with the incident and the person. You can't escape it, you can't rise

Comments

[selan]

Robyn, I think everyone experiences something that they will never forget. It's part of what makes you who you are, and people get so wrapped up in themselves (and how a particular exp effects them) that they often will forget that.

Maybe I have no right to say this, but do you think you're moving on a little without realizing it? Sure, you'll never just "get over it", but from knowing you this past year it seems there were times when this exp didn't bother you as much. Maybe not. I mean, I'm sure you're always thinking about it, but it almost seemed there were times when- despite having it on mind- you chose not to let it bother you. That, however way you look at it, can be considered rising above it.

I miss you, Robyn, and I often think of my General Havoc (and other g phis) during down time at work or around the house, and pray you are having a good day. Sorry if I said anything wrong.

[peppbrat]

You said nothing wrong. You are right, most times I can go without it bothering me, but then there are the times at work when I serve someone named Allen and I stop for a second frozen. Then I will have a memory, a really good memory in which I was laughing about something and I will try to figure out who made me laugh and there he is in the shadows someone I have tried to forget, but someone who's darkness is too hard to overcome

[selan]

Sorry for the late response. I had the hardest time trying to think of a reply for your last post. For awhile I told myself I shouldn't worry about it, as there is not much I can say to comfort you, yet at the same time I want to worry about it because I care for you

[last_of_free_ma]

It sucks that I can't really make it down there to hang out with you on the weekend; it would also suck if you really didn't want to come up here. My life has had no occurances, luckily, that could draw a gap between myself and my brothers. Do you think that strained relationship will last forever? It can't, could it?

Gosh, I've had this post on my mind this afternoon and evening. It requires a response, but I duno how. You should come up and take the guest bunk after Jaret moves out, we could watch a Death Cab for Cutie dvd or something.

[anonymous]

Hey Kid

[anonymous]

Allen didn’t have to courage to leave maybe it was fear. Maybe he didn’t want to see what would happen and who would feel what. He put the gun to his own head, not one person in his life had their finger on the trigger. What he did was selfish, in my opinion the most selfish thing you can do in life. He scarred us for life. Instead of having just the memory of the time we went to Las Vegas and all went to the movies, I believe to see Monster Inc. there is a second memory attached a permanent one he burnt in to all of our heads on October 13th. Valerie can never watch “The One” again and enjoy it. Allen took me to the shooting range to teach me how to shot a gun. It was great, I still had the target until about a month ago, but instead of me remembering that great time I had with him, I remember the gun he taught me how to shoot with was the gun he took his own life with. Its like with Honey, I have knew her my whole life, yet I can’t remember what she looks like and I can’t remember her voice or the little funny things she used to do

Sorry

[shai_valerina]

My Dearest Robyn