In the end, it's just practice, isn't it? Like drawing. You can't say you're 'naturally' bad at it; what happens is you don't practice enough. Making friends is an art: it's fun and takes some work
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I find that it's easier for me when people go out of their way to include me. From there I try to bond with them. But to go out of your way to insert yourself into an established group...gah. It's hard. :(
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