Ok...

[performingdude]

Just read through every entry in missredd's journal. Crying like a little girl right now. In one entry she noted that she did not ever think she would make it to her 25th birthday. @#$%^&*!

Comments

[performingdude]

Her words are very much a comfort to me. I often worry that I did not do enough to make her happy enough. But every time I read her thoughts, I see how much she loved me. That means I must have been doing something right.

I could not give her a life of wealth and comfort; in fact, we went through periods of extreme financial struggle, but at least we were able to love each other completely throughout everything.

That is much comfort indeed.

[nottygypsy]

Oh man, just you know hugs. I think about her every time I see you post, or look at my f-list.

[performingdude]

Thank you, sweetie. I am glad that you seem to have found the same love and closeness with someone that I had with her. You deserve it so much.

[nottygypsy]

So Reading this I went and read her journal over. I regret not commenting on it more. She even called out a question to me and I missed it. But here is what I saw reading what she wrote.

She was an amazing, beautiful, intelligent, WELL READ (would that I have read half that list, I may copy it for a goal) girl. And she was completely in love with you. You were very blessed to have her in your life. It is indeed a tragedy that she was taken so young.

She was happy Mark, she would want you to be too.

Someday, when you're ready, you will be.

Yours always,
Notty

[performingdude]

It is not that I am sad. I miss her very, very much, that goes without saying. But a time will come when we will be together again is some form. Until then, however, my life is no longer my own. I have given it over to a higher purpose. Making the world a better place in whatever way I can is now my joy.