jewish guilt time
last night we went to our friend miriam's seder, as we do most years, and her twin sons, now about 20, were there, and participating and having fun and sharing ideas about freedom and history and even poetry. (miriam had asked us each to bring and read a poem about freedom -- most of my poetry books are in woodstock, but i found an old anthology
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Sorry, that was pretty irrelevant to the heartfelt rest of your post...a topic I'm actually interested in, seeing as I never had all that close of a family, but I hear other people (eg my mom and her twin) do...(It's really not fair to compare twin-relations to everyone-else relations, though.) If you figure anything out I would love to hear it...I am hoping that, being only 23, I have time yet to not totally screw things up. (Yeah, right. :)
Um, I'm an LJ-friend of Bram's...haven't actually met him in real life but have been following his journal for some time...we had a mutual LJ-friend, and then of course I found him fascinating since I was a student at the Claremont Colleges once :).
well. nice to meet you.
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that's one reason people marry (or they used to marry, anyway) -- to make a family, so they are not so alone -- sort of "we two against the world."
if you miss that connection, it's something to search for, to create --
good luck finding and/or making yours --
and ooh -- george herbert! (you must sit down, says love, and taste my meat./so i did sit, and eat.") yum.
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...oddly enough, last semester my choir did a Vaughn Williams setting of Herbert poems, including that one. Do not try to make a college choir sing that line. I assure you everyone lost it the first time we sight-read that piece. Too bad, since it's awfully pretty.
I do get that chosen-family thing...in fact I think I, as an only child and like many only children, get it better than most...most of us seem to collect unrelated siblings, which seems to confuse many people who have their own biologically.
And I get that marriage thing too, or at least I hope I do, seeing as been there, done that, got the ring, and actually he's in the kitchen making dinner right now ;). The rest of the family thing, less clear on that. Thanks for the luck :).
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The college president at Wooster (he was very good, from one who often disses authority figures) made a big speech when I was there about Bowling Alone--which I haven't read, maybe you have--which argues that the country as a whole is losing community.
Certainly moving jobs every year is uprooting. Perhaps that's why I spend time in virtual community; but I also go to college reunions, astronomy conferences, etc.
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