Theory on why people become intimate with others
I have been working on this theory concerning why most people form relationships with others. I find that instead of searching for a partner based on merit, earned trust, or mutual understanding, people seem to fit into these other categories, which I have defined below. Any insight or further ideas on why people get together is welcomed; this list is by no means complete or without its flaws.
(Mostly) Stupid Reasons on Why People Get Together
-These factors can stand alone as well as build off one another.
Loneliness: this factor can cause people to throw down all of their ideals and preferences toward what they wish to have in a partner, and instead search to fulfill their primitive urge for sex and /or companionship by whatever means possible. Distance, location, attraction, and other factors do not typically matter to a person feeling lonely; no boundary will be so insurmountable that the lonely person will not attempt to cross it.
Proximity: people get together based on where they are, how often they see each other, and their generally nearness to one another. Important aspects of persons in a relationship based on proximity are ignored or never fully revealed. This relationship is one of convenience.
Attraction: if proximity is established, most people will only consider an intimate relationship with someone to whom they are physically attracted. Less asshole forms of attraction include those not based on appearance (i.e., sense of humor, intelligence, "personality," etc.), but are still asshole in the sense that they are separating people based off of immediate suppositions, their genes, or other factors that are almost entirely irrelevant to what really matters about a person.
• “Birds of a Feather”: people further exclude certain people from becoming intimate with them based on whether or not their partner likes the same movies, books, and music as they do.
• "Opposites Attract:" People will search out others who are different from them in an attempt to change or challenge themselves. This person is attracted to people they can gain something from, or teach something to.
(Mostly) Stupid Reasons on Why People Get Together
-These factors can stand alone as well as build off one another.
Loneliness: this factor can cause people to throw down all of their ideals and preferences toward what they wish to have in a partner, and instead search to fulfill their primitive urge for sex and /or companionship by whatever means possible. Distance, location, attraction, and other factors do not typically matter to a person feeling lonely; no boundary will be so insurmountable that the lonely person will not attempt to cross it.
Proximity: people get together based on where they are, how often they see each other, and their generally nearness to one another. Important aspects of persons in a relationship based on proximity are ignored or never fully revealed. This relationship is one of convenience.
Attraction: if proximity is established, most people will only consider an intimate relationship with someone to whom they are physically attracted. Less asshole forms of attraction include those not based on appearance (i.e., sense of humor, intelligence, "personality," etc.), but are still asshole in the sense that they are separating people based off of immediate suppositions, their genes, or other factors that are almost entirely irrelevant to what really matters about a person.
• “Birds of a Feather”: people further exclude certain people from becoming intimate with them based on whether or not their partner likes the same movies, books, and music as they do.
• "Opposites Attract:" People will search out others who are different from them in an attempt to change or challenge themselves. This person is attracted to people they can gain something from, or teach something to.