you're mistaken (if you're thinking that i haven't been called 'cold' before)
girl!sehun/girl!jongdae, nc-17
6659 words
originally posted at girlexochange
Even after years they would probably still hate each other, more or less, because didn’t you know that a little hatred makes it all the more exciting? (Sehee is fuming, Jungda is mean and all their friends just have to suffer.)
you're mistaken (if you're thinking that i haven't been called 'cold' before)
Sehee shivered and took another drag of her cigarette. It was such a fucking stupid idea to go out for a smoke with nothing but a flimsy, almost see-through tank top on in the middle of November, and now she regretted it badly, curled in on herself in the alley next to the club her band, Strawberry Milk was supposed to play the gig. The alley was narrow and filled with other people, drunk students and their even drunker giggles, polluting the air with smell of sweat and bad life choices. Sehee eyed them all jealously. She wanted some bad life choices for herself that night too, but she needed to stay sober at least till the end of the concert. Playing bass when drunk wasn’t really in her skills category, and learning about it wasn’t the most pleasurable of experiences. Strings do not want to cooperate when you don’t see the difference between two and four.
When some clearly intoxicated couple almost spilled a beer on her brand new Dr. Martens floral patterned shoes, Sehee decided it’s time to go back. Throwing the butt carelessly on the ground, she took back to the club’s door, steering clear of everything and everyone who could possibly harm her painstakingly picked outfit. She had to look fucking perfect on scene.
Oh Sehee seemed like that type of girl you mostly see on the Internet, getting hundreds of likes on her Instagram photos and having her selcas circulating all around Tumblr. She was pretty, tall and would look perfect in every Topshop outfit you could think of but really mostly dressed in thrift shops.
Oh Sehee seemed like that type of girl who got drunk on Friday nights with her friends on cheap booze and drinks bought by men and women in the clubs, who drunkenly flirted her way into everyone’s hearts and pants, who had fun and didn’t regret it next day because what is life for if not for the pleasure.
Oh Sehee seemed like the type of girl they write books about and call them “young adults’‘, the type who’s not afraid about what will people say.
The thing was, Oh Sehee didn’t only seem like such a girl. She was.
~
Sehee was breathing heavily, her back against a cold wall, hands buried in Chanyeong’s hair. The older girl was dragging her lips down her stomach, leaving hot, open-mouthed kisses in her wake. Sehee could swear her hands were everywhere.
“You sure we should do this here?’‘ Chanyeong murmured against her skin. She looked so pretty on her knees, looking up at Sehee with big eyes filled with want. Sehee wanted to see her wrecked.
“Stop talking and get back to work, Park’’ she replied, tugging her down by the hair. In retaliation, the other girl slapped her ass hard, grabbing handfuls and massaging it after, dreamy smile on her lips
“Oh Sehee, booty queen’’ she whispered and set on marking that pale skin before her eyes with lips and teeth. Sehee started laughing aloud. She couldn’t believe how Chanyeong was able to say the most ridiculous things when she was about to go down on her.
Maybe Student Council room wasn’t the best of places for a quickie, especially an hour before the meeting was set to start, but Sehee didn’t care. She was on edge the whole day after a quick but intense make out session with Chanyeong in the morning, the older girl dragging her to the deserted library bathroom and whining about how Kyungsoo still won’t touch her because of their stupid bet.
Sehee could only thank him for making Chanyeong needy enough.
She was a good girl the whole weekend. Now, she was set on getting her well-deserved orgasm, with a little help from those delightfully long fingers currently working on her pants button.
“Hurry up, we don’t have all the time in the world…’’
“Shut up you little demanding freak I’m-‘’
“What the fuck?’’
Sehee almost gritted her teeth. Of course someone must have come in. Of course it must have been her.
“Park, could you please take your hand out of Oh’s pants? I feel violated’’ said Kim Jungda, a crooked grin on her kittenish lips.
Sehee wanted to smash something.
Kim Jungda was a president of their university Student Council. Small, sharp and smart, with voice of an angel and the highest cheekbones to ever exist. She majored in Music, junior year and had her own band. Sehee hated her since the first meeting.
She found the girl absolutely awful. Cheeky, rude and uppish. Even the fact she was so hot couldn’t help. Since the first time, since Kim Jungda’s awful (funny, Jongin would say) remark about Sehee’s perpetually sleepy face she just couldn’t stand the other girl.
And now she was interrupting her private time with her favourite drummer.
That was unacceptable.
“Would you mind? We’re in the middle of something.’’ Sehee was positively seething. Jungda only raised a brow.
“Yeah, you’re in the middle of my student council’s room, partially naked so if you don’t mind, I’d ask you to bring it somewhere else. I’m not in a mood for free lesbian porn.’’
Chanyeong, still on the ground, looked up at her and snorted.
“Are you ever?’‘ Jungda sent her a sharp glare. “What? You know you’ve got no action since God knows when, it’s not my fault some of us found a nice way of shaking the stress off. Maybe you need to find someone to help you with that too?’‘
Sehee couldn’t believe her eyes. Jungda was blushing heavily, as if embarrassed about her lack of love life, but on the other hand, she also looked murderous. Murderous enough that Chanyeong cowered under her stare, the self-satisfactory smirk on her face gone. Did it hit too close? If she gave it a thought, she never heard about any of Jungda’s boyfriends or girlfriends or hookups. No make out session she’d regret next morning. No broken hearts.
“You know me pretty well, Chanyeong, you should think before you talk.’’ Jungda turned to her desk, shuffling through the papers there. Poor sheets were getting heavily crumbled. “And maybe you should pay more attention to Kyungsoo instead of seeking other resolutions.’‘ The look in her eyes when she turned her head was kind of hurt. Sehee never seen her that way before. “I’d advise you two dress up, professor Jung will be here any minute.’‘
Oh shit.
~
After the meeting ended, Sehee was standing outside the university main gate, waiting for Jongin, her best friend, to come pick her up. She was smoking, trying to shake off all those fake smiles and awful atmosphere she had to go through for the last 40 minutes.
Taking an active participation in uni’s life was in a scholarship requirements and Students Council was the one she chose, the only one she had time for. Her family was never wealthy, she wouldn’t manage to stay in college if she lost the scholarship, and losing her position as the secretary would mean just that. So she and Jungda - who was on a scholarship, too - pretended everything was right between them. They quickly came to an agreement - even though they fought like archenemies, in the boarding room, everything had to be well. Otherwise, one of them would be kicked out real soon.
That didn’t mean Sehee wasn’t sick of that. She hated pretending. She had to do this all her life, pretend that everything was alright, that her parents weren’t fighting all the time, that she didn’t need any help. It was tiring. She was close to losing it, but she had to keep on.
At least she had some things she could look forward to.
Like her band’s practice.
Jongin’s car stopped next to her so she threw the butt in the trash and got in, smiling wildly. Enough thinking about her worries for a day.
~
“Does Kim Jungda have a boyfriend?’‘
Jongin looked up from whatever weird English Literature book he was reading, giving Sehee a blank look. Sehee stopped throwing her stress ball at the wall to stick her tongue out. Studying was boring. She had better things to think about.
“Get back to work, you lazy ass.’’
“Hey, I’ve got the best ass ever, okay? Ask anyone.’‘ She grinned, getting out of bed and sliding to Minseok, a guy she met in her Astronomy lab and with whom she quickly bonded over bubble tea and music. “You play in her band, you ought to know something.’‘
“Don’t drag me into whatever mess you want to make, I’m here only for the notes’’ he murmured, not even raising his eyes from the work he was doing. Sehee sighed. Guys were so difficult.
“I just wanna know! Tell me if she’s dating anyone.’‘
“No, or at least no one I know about. Leave me alone.’‘
“Is she straight or gay?’‘
“I don’t know.’‘
“What do you mean you don’t know, didn’t she have any past relationships? No friends with benefits? Dates?’’
Minseok sent a glare her way. Sehee smiled wildly. Aegyo always worked.
Minseok rolled his eyes. Not this time.
“I know nothing. Leave me alone and get back to your essay, it’s not gonna write itself.’‘
Sehee pouted. She wanted to know. And if she did - she will. One way or another, she will find out about Kim Jungda’s mysterious love life.
~
Next gig they played, first Friday of December, they shared with some of the other local bands. Jungda, along with Zabava, her band, were there too.
Even though the music they performed was pretty different, Sehee thought their bands were rivals anyway. Strawberry Milk played powerful and bright rock music, with Baekhyun, their vocal who was particularly fond of growls, cheeky laughs and inappropriate hand gestures. Zabava was more about mellow indie music, a pretty combination of electronic and acoustics. Sehee would never admit it out loud, but she really liked what they played.
The rivalry between the bands was a specific one, too - really, only Sehee and Jungda was serious about it. As all the members attended the same university - or knew themselves since God knows when - it was all about a friendly competition. But not for the leaders - they always tried to aim higher, be better, outdo one another.
So now Sehee was sitting on a couch backstage, watching Baekhyun talk with Jungda, the older girl dressed in a simple black dress that hug her ample chest and not-so-ample bottom prettily. Sehee squinted.
“Is he flirting with her?’’ she asked no one in particular. Jungda was now laughing, her face scrunched up adorably. Kyungsoo, sitting next to her, raised his eyes from his iPad.
“Nah, they’re just talking, you know they are both Music majors.’‘
Sehee wasn’t so sure. Baekhyun’s arm was now around the girl’s waist. She voiced her thoughts, but Kyungsoo only smirked.
“You know he’s like that with everyone. Besides, I don’t know if she’s interested. Baekhyun’s probably too annoying.’‘
Sehee perked up. Did Kyungsoo know anything? Maybe he will be able to help her?
“Oh, he’s not her type? Is she taken? Does she have a crush? Does she not like the annoying ones?’‘
Kyungsoo raised his brows and snorted.
“Don’t know. Ask Junhee, she’s her bestie.’‘
“But Junhee won’t tell me anything!’’ she whined. Kim Junhee was too proper to spill such secrets to Sehee, no matter how long they knew each other and what things they did when no one was home. Kyungsoo shrugged.
“Ask someone to ask her.’‘
Oh, that was brilliant! Sehee smiled brightly, turning to kiss the boy on the cheek and thanking him. She knew what she had to do!
“Taozi!’’
Taozi was an answer to all questions.
Sehee met her a few years ago, when Strawberry Milk, a newly created band, was looking for a guitarist. Tao was Chinese and struggling with English but the two of them clicked immediately, quickly becoming best of friends, always teasing each other and causing so much ruckus, Jongin and Junhee used to sigh and disappear, not wanting to be associated with such brats.
Now they were roommates, but Taozi spent most of her time with Junhee, trying to flirt her way into the girl’s heart. And Junhee was Jungda’s best friend. She wouldn’t tell anything to Sehee, but Taozi… Taozi was a different story.
“Tao, my best of bestest friends, I have a mission for you!’‘
The future was looking bright.
~
The concert was a blast, everyone giving their best. Afterwards, they got their well-deserved fun - though Sehee regretted it badly the next day, fighting with giant hangover on her morning shift at the convenient store near her dorm. Rest of the weekend she spent lazying around her room, watching one too many anime episodes with Jongin and eating too much chocolate chip cookies. She also tried to catch up with her readings Sunday night so when she got to class on Monday she was more sleep than normal. Her Astro lab she spent hiding behind Minseok’s back, trying to finish her Phys 203 homework.
Now, she had a two hours break, sitting in a cozy campus café, drinking an overly sweet latte and trying to read a book and not fall asleep in the most comfy armchair ever, a plate of half eaten cheesecake Luhan, who worked here as a barista, gave her for free. “For a regular’’ he said, winking.
She called him gross and kissed him on a cheek.
“Oh, look who’s here!’‘
Sehee raised her head. Next to her chair stand Yixing, a friend she hasn’t seen in ages. They knew each other because of Taozi, Yixing helping here get accustomed to a new country when she first came here. Sehee smiled brightly and then her eyes landed on a person standing behind him.
Oh, does she have to be everywhere?
“We aren’t interrupting, right? Jungda, sit down, I haven’t seen Sehee in so long!’‘
Both girls looked startled, but when Yixing smiled and pulled a chair back for Jungda they couldn’t say anything. No one could refuse Yixing. Jungda sat down opposite to Sehee. She looked so awkward it hurt.
“Great, I’m gonna go and order, you girls have fun!’‘
The boy was gone in a second. Sehee blinked, incredulous. She was sure Yixing did it on purpose. He always seemed oblivious, so people underestimated him, but he cunningly used it to his advantage, feigning innocence after all the trouble he caused.
“Don’t worry, I can just go.’‘
Jungda’s voice pulled her out of her thoughts. The older girl looked uncomfortable.
“Whatever’’ Sehee mumbled, shrugging. ‘’Just, I don’t know, don’t say a word.’’
‘’Because, what, I will disturb the queen?’’ Jungda snorted and folded her arms on her chest. ‘’I will talk all I want whenever I want.’’
Oh my God, she was so annoying! Sehee closed the book, throwing it on the other armchair with flourish. She came there to have a good time, not to deal with sarcastic assholes who didn’t know when to shut up.
When she said it all out loud Jungda leaned to her, saying in the sweetest voice possible ‘’that’s sad, because I’m here exactly to make your life as difficult as I can.’’
And so she did. When Sehee went back to her book Jungda started taping the table with her fingernails, sending a charming smile her way when Sehee looked up, murderous. Then, she decided it was a great idea to read the whole menu aloud, asking a passing waiter to explain every drink. Sehee was feeling a headache coming.
She looked to the counter, seeking help in a form of Yixing, but he was too busy flirting with Luhan, the older male wrapped around his middle finger completely. Gross.
When, for a while, Jungda engrossed in her cellphone, getting quiet, Sehee thought that will be all for today, but then an obnoxious Girls’ Generation ringtone sounded and Jungda picked up, her voice overly sweet and loud. After a third ‘’accidental’’ kick to her shin Sehee stood up and started gathering her things. She won’t let someone so rude interrupt her quality time.
~
“Why are you so against her?’‘
Jongin and Sehee lay on her bed, her head on his stomach. She was just relating her meeting with Jungda, whining and complaining about the older girl and Yixing, the traitor, when Jongin suddenly interrupted her. Sehee raised her head and sent him a confused look.
“What do you mean?’‘
Jongin fidgeted nervously under her stare. He hoped she won’t throw him out before the promised cake and pizza.
‘’I mean, what is it that you find so annoying about her? She never caused you any harm, right? She’s just a bit mean sometimes, but as long as I’m concerned, it’s all pretty friendly.’’
Sehee furrowed her brows. What question even was that? Jungda was mean. And a smartass. First thing she sad to Sehee was “You look like a stoner.’‘. That wasn’t nice. Sehee didn’t find it friendly. Jungda was cheeky, an attention seeker. Always had to be right. Her laugh was annoying. Her voice, too. And everyone just loved her. Ugh, Sehee couldn’t take it. Everyone thought Kim Jungda was an angel.
She told him all that, her voice rising. She was seeking appreciation in his eyes, but all Jongin did was laugh. And what a laugh was that! Sehee was sure her best friend would never stop, laughing like a hyena and shaking from all of that mirth. She sat up straight and whacked him on the chest.
‘’Stop cackling, you stupid moose, what the fuck?’’
Jongin wiped a stray tear and smiled brightly at her, relaxing.
‘’You’re jealous! Oh my god, all that drama is only because you are jealous! ‘’
‘’What? No! I’m not jealous of that skinny midget! Why would I be, she’s…’‘
“Smart, pretty, funny. Popular. You see her as a potential threat!’‘
Sehee started whacking him again. She wasn’t jealous! She never thought anything positive about Kim Jungda! Jongin was delusional!
“Can’t you see how annoying she is? Why no one sees that!’‘
Jongin shook his head
“She’s cool. You would see if only you stopped fuming every time you see her. Think about it - maybe you should give her a chance.’‘
Sehee deflated. That wasn’t fair. Even her best friend was against her.
~
‘’My friends say I’m jealous of you. Tell them the truth!’’
Jungda looked startled by the sudden voice from behind her. When she turned and saw Sehee, hair in disarray, breathing heavily with a kind of fury in her eyes, she snorted. The younger girl was positively fuming. ‘’And what’s the truth?’’
Sehee sat heavily on a chair next to hers, throwing her bag at the table, not minding all the papers Jungda was currently working on. Student Council work be damned. The situation at hand was much more important. Their treasurer, a quiet kid from sophomore year named Hyuk startled at Sehee’s raised voice and now he was grabbing his things and leaving quickly, murmuring something about other things to do.
‘’That I’m not!’’
‘’Aren’t you?’’
Jungda smiled at her brightly, her eyes disappearing in little slits, corners of her mouth rising even more. Sehee wanted to punch her so hard she had to grip the edge of the table. What a cheeky little bastard!
‘’I hate you! Oh my God of course I’m not jealous why would I be!?’’
‘’If you say so.’’ Jungda shrugged, turning back to her work. She hid a smirk under her hair. ‘’Do you have that report from the last meeting I asked you for?’’
Sehee huffed and started searching through her bag. She wasn’t jealous!
‘’Do you think you cou-‘’
‘’I’m not jealous! I just don’t like you!’’
‘’Why?’’
Jungda looked at her expectantly. Her lips were drawn in a line. The raised corners of her mouth were even more visible.
“Is it wrong to just not like you?’’ Jungda raised a brow. ‘’Okay, okay, I get it. I don’t know. I just don’t.’’
The older girl smiled brightly, raising and tugging Sehee with her.
‘’Can I prove you wrong?’’
~
Oh Sehee just spent two hours with Kim Jungda alone and she was alive and breathing and not at all hurt.
Incredible.
Sehee lay on her bed, lifeless. She couldn’t believe it. That didn’t happen.
(‘’Do you want to be my friend?’’ Sehee felt like a child under Jungda’s look.
‘’No. I just don’t want to be your enemy.’’)
After Jungda dragged her out of campus they went for bubble tea. Sehee felt awkward, but Jungda was set on behaving like they didn’t fought constantly for the last 1,5 year. She told Sehee about her family and her cat, about what living with Junhee was, about how she was struggling, too, to find time for anything outside of school, job and a band. Sehee just listened, trying to suck all her tapioca balls through a straw. The older girl tried to engage her in the conversation too - she answered some question and just shook her head at the rest.
The worst part was, Jungda really seemed like a sweet girl. Sassy, yes, but cute and caring. Sehee couldn’t stop thinking it was just an act. She couldn’t be so wrong about a single person for so long. Right. Right?
She sighed, getting up, concentrated on doing something that could occupy her thoughts enough to forget about today’s afternoon.
And that’s when her phone started ringing.
‘’Hi, Taozi.’’
~
‘’WHAT?’’
Sehee gaped. Tao called an hour ago claiming she had big news about the “J mission’‘ and they had to meet immediately, so now the girls were sitting in Sehee’s dorm, Taozi’s immaculate outfit and makeup in a big contrast to the mess that was Sehee’s room. Frankly, the girl couldn’t care less. The news was indeed big.
‘’What do you mean she’s a virgin?’’
Tao rolled her eyes and gently closed Sehee’s hanging jaw. She knew her best friend would react just like that.
‘’Never had sex. One boyfriend, early high school. Nothing more.’’
‘’How is that possible?’’ Sehee sounded hysterical. ‘’Why would someone do that? Is she religious? Or, I don’t know, overly romantic?’’
‘’Sehee, you know it’s not a bad thing, right?’’ The younger girl nodded. She knew, of course, it wasn’t like she thought it was a bad thing. She was just… surprised. Jungda didn’t look like a girl shying from all those “nasty things’‘. She was pretty shameless in what she always said. ‘’Junhee says people are afraid of her. They like her, but she seems so strong and so smart all the potential interested ones are afraid to court her. You know she’s too witty for her own good. And she’s really uncomfortable with that. She just can’t find a person who could handle her. And she’s got no time for that. ’’
Sehee was… shocked. Yes. Of all the things, she never thought Jungda was scary. But she kind of could see where it came from - people, especially men, were afraid about others who were smarter. Brighter. Sharper.
But maybe she just couldn’t relax? Sehee imagined it - some guy in a club coming to flirt with Jungda. She’d probably never notice and treat him nice but just as every other person.
Taozi shook her shoulder.
‘’Please, please don’t let her know I told you, Junhee will kill me.’’
‘’Don’t worry, I’ll be as subtle as ever!’’
~
‘’Are you really a virgin?’’
Okay, subtle was never Sehee’s thing. Especially if tipsy.
They were at Luhan’s - as the Christmas was getting close, he decided to throw a Christmas party and of course invited all his friends and their moms. So now here they were, at Luhan’s balcony, 10th floor, overlooking the city shining bright at night. Behind the closed glass door the party was in a full swing, people drinking and dancing, everyone forgetting about the upcoming midterms. Sehee thought she saw Taozi climbing the table and trying to drag an unwilling Junhee with her. Jungda stood next to her, drink in her hand, some fancy looking mix. She looked cute today, Sehee thought. Her light brown hair was pulled in a messy bun, accentuating her flushed cheekbones.
When Sehee, 3 beers in, came out on the balcony and asked the question Jungda’s head raised so quick even Sehee felt dizzy.
She looked angry.
‘’What do you want, Oh?’’ she said through clenched teeth, fingers gripping the plastic cup tight. Sehee frowned.
‘’Hey, relax, I jus-‘’
‘’What, you wanna laugh at me? Is it some kind of blackmail? Who told you?’’
Sehee reached her hand to place it reassuringly on Jungda’s arm but the older girl took a step back and turned. Now the flush reached her neck, too. Sehee felt lost.
‘’I’m not going to laugh at you, there’s nothing to laugh at. I was just curious.’’
She could see Jungda flinch but the older girl still wouldn’t look at her. Someone opened the door but she only hissed at them to get the fuck out. When the party noises quieted, Sehee stepped forward to stand next to Jungda, observing the cars driving beneath them.
‘’I really just wanted to know for sure.’’
‘’Why are you so curious?’’ Jungda interrupted her. When Sehee looked at her she looked mad, but there was also fear in her eyes.
‘’Because I don’t understand.’’
“Well they told you, aren’t they? What’s new can I tell you?’’
‘’I still don’t get it. You’re hot. You could have whoever you want and yet you don’t.’’
‘’You think I’m hot?’’ At first, Jungda looked at her surprised, but then a cockish smile showed on her face. Sehee could only wait for her to whip her hair. She shrugged and laid her arms on the railing, half of her body slack and hanging out of the balcony.
‘’You are. It’s a shame I don’t like you, if not I’d woo you in an instant.’’
Jungda started to laugh and the sound normally so irritating didn’t feel that bad this time. Sehee smiled.
‘’Maybe you should try to get to know me before you decide whether I’m worth your liking’’ Jungda said wryly, taking a sip and pulling a face afterwards. ‘’Jesus, it’s too sweet to be real, Chanyeong is the worst bartender of all times.’’
‘’Yeah, she’s bad’’ Sehee sighed. ‘’You know, I’ve been thinking about it. About what Jongin told me, that maybe I really am jealous about you.’’ Sehee’s gaze was focused on the constantly flicking Christmas decoration on the building far away. She couldn’t look at Jungda right now. She couldn’t even admit it to herself - even after all the thinking it was hard to accept a simple fact that she could have been wrong and that’s why Sehee, as stubborn as ever, smiled crookedly and continued. ‘’And I still don’t think he’s right, but I’m willing to try and see whether I was wrong about you or not.’’ She waited a while for a response but when none came, she added ‘’the last time, at the bubble tea café… It wasn’t so bad. Maybe, just maybe, you are manageable. And if we were to meet on a neutral ground again, maybe I could help with the flirting problem you obviously have.’’
For a few seconds there was only silence and then Sehee heard a snort and turned to look at Jungda for the first time since her little speech. The older girl was looking at her somewhat incredulously, but also like she was trying to suppress a laugh.
‘’You guess I could maybe be nice? You little brat’’ Jungda shook her head but she smiled a little before straightening up and starting in a serious tone, frowning. ‘’How do you do this? How do you deal with all the people you sleep with?’’
‘’Are you implying I sleep around?’’ The look Jungda sent her could only be read as ‘really?’ ‘’Okay, maybe I do, a little. I don’t know. It comes natural. Sometimes I just like to be with someone and to either meet new people or get back with old friends. Sometimes it ends up in bed because it’s just a natural need.’’
‘’You need to teach me that. And I need to teach you how not to judge people because they’re prettier than you.’’ Jungda stuck her tongue out and quickly rushed back to the apartment, her tinkling laugh following her.
‘’Hey, you’re no- I haven- You little fucker!’’
~
The next few weeks, Sehee and Jungda met regularly, either for a short lunch or a coffee that turned into few hours of talking. Half of the times Sehee still got mad at Jungda, still a little distrustful, still wary and waiting for the act to drop. Jungda just patiently patted her on the head and sarcastically said that one day she will turn into a vampire and suck Sehee dry, suggestively waggling her eyebrows.
‘’You look pretty today.’’
Almost spilling her coffee, Sehee jumped in her seat, accidentally closing her game of Two Dots.
Damn, she was so close to finally winning that challenge.
She observed Jungda for a while, the other girl watching her too, carefully, attentively.
‘’Thanks?’’ she replied, unsure. She didn’t feel particularly different than every other day, but Jungda smiled, pleased, so she smiled too.
‘’And you’re really cute when you’re not trying to kill me all the time.’’
Sehee frowned when Jungda’s smile went even wider. Lately she was paying Sehee’s so much compliments there has to be something she wanted. She was much more relaxed, too - either because they were getting along pretty well or because of the “flirting with people” training Sehee was making her go through. Once in a while the two would go out in the evening, Sehee telling Jungda to just go and charm people at the bar or the club or the street - for practice. She was getting really good at that (and they had lots of free alcohol, too).
‘’You want something don’t you?’’
‘’Go out with me.’’
Sehee choked on her latte, coughing like crazy. Did she hear her right? From all the things she might suspect, that was somewhere far on the list. When Sehee got better she noticed the look on Jungda’s face was pretty uncertain. The older girl was nervously playing with a napkin, tearing it into shreds.
‘’What?’’
‘’You heard me right. Go out with me. On a date.’’
‘’Why?!’’
Jungda snorted, throwing a balled up piece of napkin at her.
‘’Because you’re cute. And you’re not afraid of talking back to me and you’re not boring, so I guess we could be good together? I don’t know, but why can’t we try?’’
Sehee looked at her suspiciously. She was sure the older girl were just joking, waiting for her to agree and then laugh at her for the eternity. But Jungda’s face was serious - so was her tone. She looked sure. Sehee felt so lost she didn’t know what to do.
‘’I hope you are perfectly aware I still sometimes want to kill you?’’ she asked slowly, as if to make sure Jungda understand. But the other girl just nodded enthusiastically.
‘’Doesn’t that make it all the more exciting?’’
Oh, she was so screwed.
Apparently, Jungda’s idea of a date was to drink cheap wine in a park and make out on the wall of her apartment. Not that there was anything to complain on.
Sehee was pinning her to the wall, the older girl’s small hands sneaking under her shirt, causing the warm skin to rise in goose bumps with how cold her palms were. They were kissing furiously, Jungda a bit sloppy and inexperienced but still good, good enough for Sehee to whine when she tugged on her lower lip with her teeth. Sehee was trying to contain her enthusiasm, but Jungda was set on doing everything her own way, tugging her in the right directions, mouthing at her jaw when her hands were busy toying with Sehee’s belly piercing. The younger laughed, grabbing the aggressive hands and leaning down to nose at her cheek.
‘’Relax, we’ve got lots of time’’ she murmured, lips travelling down the smooth line of the other girl’s neck. She could feel her pulse, quick, her labored breath at her temple. Her curious hands slid under Jungda’s dress to grab on her cute little butt. She dressed up for Sehee so nicely today, shivered in a cold weather in her thighs and a very flattering but very thin coat. Sehee called her silly. Jungda just shushed her and told her to drink more.
Jungda’s body pressed up into her, the girl gasping when Sehee’s teeth closed on her neck hard, marking her with little red bruises.
‘’That’s for making me wait for nearly an hour’’ she whispered, tugging on the collar of the dress to press even more bruising kisses down Jungda’s arms. The older girl just started to laugh, her head thrown back, eyes closed.
‘’Told you it’s much more exciting when there’s a little hate involved’’ she licked her swollen lips, making them even more shiny. Sehee wanted to taste her again.
‘’You’re sick, I swear’’ she murmured against those kitten lips, Jungda’s hands tangling in her hair, tugging her down so she wouldn’t have to stand on her toes. The girl made a keen little noise in the back of her throat when Sehee’s tongue peaked in, tangling with hers. The kiss was heated and a little desperate, Jungda already impatient, urging Sehee to go faster, to give her more.
‘’Let’s bring it to the bed’’ she whispered and immediately went for Sehee’s mouth again.
The journey to the bedroom was just a little bumpy, Jungda tugging her by the clasps of her already half-unbuttoned shirt. There was so much urgency in her movement that when Sehee laid her down, she pinned her hands to the bed and broke their kiss, looking at the older girl carefully.
‘’Hey, are you sure you want to do all this? You don’t have to rush, we can wait..’’
‘’Oh Sehee, I did 19 years of waiting, I can’t fucking wait to eat you out so can you please shut up and get back to the important things?’’ she said heatedly, tangling their legs together so Sehee would lose her balance and press their bodies together. The younger’s breath hitched, all the doubts flying away when Jungda pressed their lips together and murmured ‘’and if you won’t let me, I’ll dump you in an instant, I swear.’’
Sehee sat up on her knees, tugging her shirt all the way off and then proceeding to do just that to Jungda’s tights and dress. She couldn’t help but moan at the sight of the older girl dresses in just her underwear, ample breasts spilling out of her cups and just begging to be touched. When she licked her lips Jungda made an embarrassed sound, only now looking a bit unsure.
‘’Jesus, that’s so embarrassing’’ she whined, hiding her breast from Sehee’s view. The younger girl pouted heavily, slapping her hands away.
‘’Don’t be embarrassed, fuck, you’re so gorgeous.’’ There was a clear admiration in her voice. Jungda blushed even harder but obediently lowered her hands. ‘’I swear you’re so hot, all that cowardly jerks don’t know what they are missing.’’ Hands roaming flawless skin, muscles jumping under the attentive touch, Sehee leaned down, nosing at the swell of her breasts. She felt curious hands on her, too, sliding along collarbones and a gently curving waist, but that wasn’t the most important thing - tonight she was focused on making Jungda feel good, wanting only the best memories for her.
Besides, what was better than hearing your partner’s moans of pleasure?
‘’Hurry up’’ Jungda whispered, breath hiking when she tangled their legs together, rubbing her hips against Sehee’s clothed thigh, desperate. Her panties were soaked wet already, a pretty flush reaching her collarbones. ‘’Sehee, I need you, please hurry up’’ she moaned, bowing her back. Sehee’s senses were going into overdrive - right now she couldn’t think of anything hotter than Jungda so desperate to get off she needed to rock her hips against her.
‘’Shhh, relax, I’ve got you’’ whispering reassuringly, she unclasped Jungda’s bra, finally getting full access to her beautiful breasts. She planted kisses along the unmarred skin and when the older’s fingers started digging in her back harder, her sole attention focused on a nipple, sucking and tugging. The constant string of breathy ahs escaping Jungda’s throat was a good enough confirmation she was going in a good way.
By the time her fingers were skimming the hem on Jungda’s panties the girl was a mess, red marks littering not only her neck but her chest, too, hair in disarray, lips bitten from all those choked out moans. But the best part was about to come - Sehee’s hand reaching under her underwear, nimble fingers lightly touching Jungda’s soaked cunt. On the first touch through her slit Jungda bowed her back even more and pressed her hips into Sehee’s palms, letting out the longest and loudest moan till now. Her eyes were closed and she was breathing hard, anticipating another move. Fuck, Sehee was so wet herself just from watching her.
‘’I’m gonna pull them off, okay?’’ she asked and the other girl just nodded her head furiously, raising her hips to help.
The first rub on her clit made Jungda open her eyes, looking at Sehee with so much need she hadn’t had the heart not to give her what she wanted. Sehee pulled her hips on her lap, spreading Jungda’s legs wider and looking at her dark pink pussy, all slick and shining with arousal. The sight was mouth-watering. She couldn’t wait to get a taste of her. But for now, she focused on her clit, rubbing little circles with her thumb. Jungda was grabbing the bed sheets tight, jerking her hips, trying to make Sehee touch her more.
When Sehee slid first finger in, they both moaned at the sensation, warm slick walls effulging the girl’s digit so deliciously. Jungda was positively dripping with how wet she was. That wouldn’t take a lot of time, definitely.
‘’Fuck, you’re so tight’’ Sehee whispered with an awe. ‘’And so wet, God, I can’t believe it.’’
‘’Faster, please please please Sehee, I need you to go faster please.’’
And so Sehee did, fucking her with one, then two fingers, Jungda matching her rhythm with her jerking. She was babbling, talking about how good it felt and how she was close ‘’oh my so close just a little more Sehee please please’’ and with the addition of a thumb on her clit, fingers inside her crooking just right Jungda came, throwing her head back and screaming, her walls fluttering around Sehee’s digits, her whole body shuddering. Sehee wasn’t sure if she hadn’t blacked out for a while, boneless and so sated. After milking her orgasm, she pulled out her fingers, placing a reassuring hand on the girl’s thigh.
‘’You okay?’’
Jungda groaned and opened her eyes, a widest grin adoring her face.
‘’Never been better.’’
They stared at each other and then started laughing, Sehee lying next to the other girl, grabbing her hand with her less-soaked one, a smile probably making her look super silly but she didn’t care. Especially since she still was wet and aching and her pants were still on.
‘’So, that part about eating me out… You think I can bring it up now?’’
Jungda laughed again and climbed on her, pressing their breasts together, her hands going for Sehee’s zipper.
‘’I think I could help with that.’’
Few hours later, after another 4 orgasms and a shower they were trying to fall asleep, Jungda’s back to Sehee’s chest, the younger snuggling into a finally warm neck.
‘’Don’t think too high of yourself, I still hate you sometimes.’’
‘’Goodnight to you too, you silly brat.’’
6659 words
originally posted at girlexochange
Even after years they would probably still hate each other, more or less, because didn’t you know that a little hatred makes it all the more exciting? (Sehee is fuming, Jungda is mean and all their friends just have to suffer.)
you're mistaken (if you're thinking that i haven't been called 'cold' before)
Sehee shivered and took another drag of her cigarette. It was such a fucking stupid idea to go out for a smoke with nothing but a flimsy, almost see-through tank top on in the middle of November, and now she regretted it badly, curled in on herself in the alley next to the club her band, Strawberry Milk was supposed to play the gig. The alley was narrow and filled with other people, drunk students and their even drunker giggles, polluting the air with smell of sweat and bad life choices. Sehee eyed them all jealously. She wanted some bad life choices for herself that night too, but she needed to stay sober at least till the end of the concert. Playing bass when drunk wasn’t really in her skills category, and learning about it wasn’t the most pleasurable of experiences. Strings do not want to cooperate when you don’t see the difference between two and four.
When some clearly intoxicated couple almost spilled a beer on her brand new Dr. Martens floral patterned shoes, Sehee decided it’s time to go back. Throwing the butt carelessly on the ground, she took back to the club’s door, steering clear of everything and everyone who could possibly harm her painstakingly picked outfit. She had to look fucking perfect on scene.
Oh Sehee seemed like that type of girl you mostly see on the Internet, getting hundreds of likes on her Instagram photos and having her selcas circulating all around Tumblr. She was pretty, tall and would look perfect in every Topshop outfit you could think of but really mostly dressed in thrift shops.
Oh Sehee seemed like that type of girl who got drunk on Friday nights with her friends on cheap booze and drinks bought by men and women in the clubs, who drunkenly flirted her way into everyone’s hearts and pants, who had fun and didn’t regret it next day because what is life for if not for the pleasure.
Oh Sehee seemed like the type of girl they write books about and call them “young adults’‘, the type who’s not afraid about what will people say.
The thing was, Oh Sehee didn’t only seem like such a girl. She was.
~
Sehee was breathing heavily, her back against a cold wall, hands buried in Chanyeong’s hair. The older girl was dragging her lips down her stomach, leaving hot, open-mouthed kisses in her wake. Sehee could swear her hands were everywhere.
“You sure we should do this here?’‘ Chanyeong murmured against her skin. She looked so pretty on her knees, looking up at Sehee with big eyes filled with want. Sehee wanted to see her wrecked.
“Stop talking and get back to work, Park’’ she replied, tugging her down by the hair. In retaliation, the other girl slapped her ass hard, grabbing handfuls and massaging it after, dreamy smile on her lips
“Oh Sehee, booty queen’’ she whispered and set on marking that pale skin before her eyes with lips and teeth. Sehee started laughing aloud. She couldn’t believe how Chanyeong was able to say the most ridiculous things when she was about to go down on her.
Maybe Student Council room wasn’t the best of places for a quickie, especially an hour before the meeting was set to start, but Sehee didn’t care. She was on edge the whole day after a quick but intense make out session with Chanyeong in the morning, the older girl dragging her to the deserted library bathroom and whining about how Kyungsoo still won’t touch her because of their stupid bet.
Sehee could only thank him for making Chanyeong needy enough.
She was a good girl the whole weekend. Now, she was set on getting her well-deserved orgasm, with a little help from those delightfully long fingers currently working on her pants button.
“Hurry up, we don’t have all the time in the world…’’
“Shut up you little demanding freak I’m-‘’
“What the fuck?’’
Sehee almost gritted her teeth. Of course someone must have come in. Of course it must have been her.
“Park, could you please take your hand out of Oh’s pants? I feel violated’’ said Kim Jungda, a crooked grin on her kittenish lips.
Sehee wanted to smash something.
Kim Jungda was a president of their university Student Council. Small, sharp and smart, with voice of an angel and the highest cheekbones to ever exist. She majored in Music, junior year and had her own band. Sehee hated her since the first meeting.
She found the girl absolutely awful. Cheeky, rude and uppish. Even the fact she was so hot couldn’t help. Since the first time, since Kim Jungda’s awful (funny, Jongin would say) remark about Sehee’s perpetually sleepy face she just couldn’t stand the other girl.
And now she was interrupting her private time with her favourite drummer.
That was unacceptable.
“Would you mind? We’re in the middle of something.’’ Sehee was positively seething. Jungda only raised a brow.
“Yeah, you’re in the middle of my student council’s room, partially naked so if you don’t mind, I’d ask you to bring it somewhere else. I’m not in a mood for free lesbian porn.’’
Chanyeong, still on the ground, looked up at her and snorted.
“Are you ever?’‘ Jungda sent her a sharp glare. “What? You know you’ve got no action since God knows when, it’s not my fault some of us found a nice way of shaking the stress off. Maybe you need to find someone to help you with that too?’‘
Sehee couldn’t believe her eyes. Jungda was blushing heavily, as if embarrassed about her lack of love life, but on the other hand, she also looked murderous. Murderous enough that Chanyeong cowered under her stare, the self-satisfactory smirk on her face gone. Did it hit too close? If she gave it a thought, she never heard about any of Jungda’s boyfriends or girlfriends or hookups. No make out session she’d regret next morning. No broken hearts.
“You know me pretty well, Chanyeong, you should think before you talk.’’ Jungda turned to her desk, shuffling through the papers there. Poor sheets were getting heavily crumbled. “And maybe you should pay more attention to Kyungsoo instead of seeking other resolutions.’‘ The look in her eyes when she turned her head was kind of hurt. Sehee never seen her that way before. “I’d advise you two dress up, professor Jung will be here any minute.’‘
Oh shit.
~
After the meeting ended, Sehee was standing outside the university main gate, waiting for Jongin, her best friend, to come pick her up. She was smoking, trying to shake off all those fake smiles and awful atmosphere she had to go through for the last 40 minutes.
Taking an active participation in uni’s life was in a scholarship requirements and Students Council was the one she chose, the only one she had time for. Her family was never wealthy, she wouldn’t manage to stay in college if she lost the scholarship, and losing her position as the secretary would mean just that. So she and Jungda - who was on a scholarship, too - pretended everything was right between them. They quickly came to an agreement - even though they fought like archenemies, in the boarding room, everything had to be well. Otherwise, one of them would be kicked out real soon.
That didn’t mean Sehee wasn’t sick of that. She hated pretending. She had to do this all her life, pretend that everything was alright, that her parents weren’t fighting all the time, that she didn’t need any help. It was tiring. She was close to losing it, but she had to keep on.
At least she had some things she could look forward to.
Like her band’s practice.
Jongin’s car stopped next to her so she threw the butt in the trash and got in, smiling wildly. Enough thinking about her worries for a day.
~
“Does Kim Jungda have a boyfriend?’‘
Jongin looked up from whatever weird English Literature book he was reading, giving Sehee a blank look. Sehee stopped throwing her stress ball at the wall to stick her tongue out. Studying was boring. She had better things to think about.
“Get back to work, you lazy ass.’’
“Hey, I’ve got the best ass ever, okay? Ask anyone.’‘ She grinned, getting out of bed and sliding to Minseok, a guy she met in her Astronomy lab and with whom she quickly bonded over bubble tea and music. “You play in her band, you ought to know something.’‘
“Don’t drag me into whatever mess you want to make, I’m here only for the notes’’ he murmured, not even raising his eyes from the work he was doing. Sehee sighed. Guys were so difficult.
“I just wanna know! Tell me if she’s dating anyone.’‘
“No, or at least no one I know about. Leave me alone.’‘
“Is she straight or gay?’‘
“I don’t know.’‘
“What do you mean you don’t know, didn’t she have any past relationships? No friends with benefits? Dates?’’
Minseok sent a glare her way. Sehee smiled wildly. Aegyo always worked.
Minseok rolled his eyes. Not this time.
“I know nothing. Leave me alone and get back to your essay, it’s not gonna write itself.’‘
Sehee pouted. She wanted to know. And if she did - she will. One way or another, she will find out about Kim Jungda’s mysterious love life.
~
Next gig they played, first Friday of December, they shared with some of the other local bands. Jungda, along with Zabava, her band, were there too.
Even though the music they performed was pretty different, Sehee thought their bands were rivals anyway. Strawberry Milk played powerful and bright rock music, with Baekhyun, their vocal who was particularly fond of growls, cheeky laughs and inappropriate hand gestures. Zabava was more about mellow indie music, a pretty combination of electronic and acoustics. Sehee would never admit it out loud, but she really liked what they played.
The rivalry between the bands was a specific one, too - really, only Sehee and Jungda was serious about it. As all the members attended the same university - or knew themselves since God knows when - it was all about a friendly competition. But not for the leaders - they always tried to aim higher, be better, outdo one another.
So now Sehee was sitting on a couch backstage, watching Baekhyun talk with Jungda, the older girl dressed in a simple black dress that hug her ample chest and not-so-ample bottom prettily. Sehee squinted.
“Is he flirting with her?’’ she asked no one in particular. Jungda was now laughing, her face scrunched up adorably. Kyungsoo, sitting next to her, raised his eyes from his iPad.
“Nah, they’re just talking, you know they are both Music majors.’‘
Sehee wasn’t so sure. Baekhyun’s arm was now around the girl’s waist. She voiced her thoughts, but Kyungsoo only smirked.
“You know he’s like that with everyone. Besides, I don’t know if she’s interested. Baekhyun’s probably too annoying.’‘
Sehee perked up. Did Kyungsoo know anything? Maybe he will be able to help her?
“Oh, he’s not her type? Is she taken? Does she have a crush? Does she not like the annoying ones?’‘
Kyungsoo raised his brows and snorted.
“Don’t know. Ask Junhee, she’s her bestie.’‘
“But Junhee won’t tell me anything!’’ she whined. Kim Junhee was too proper to spill such secrets to Sehee, no matter how long they knew each other and what things they did when no one was home. Kyungsoo shrugged.
“Ask someone to ask her.’‘
Oh, that was brilliant! Sehee smiled brightly, turning to kiss the boy on the cheek and thanking him. She knew what she had to do!
“Taozi!’’
Taozi was an answer to all questions.
Sehee met her a few years ago, when Strawberry Milk, a newly created band, was looking for a guitarist. Tao was Chinese and struggling with English but the two of them clicked immediately, quickly becoming best of friends, always teasing each other and causing so much ruckus, Jongin and Junhee used to sigh and disappear, not wanting to be associated with such brats.
Now they were roommates, but Taozi spent most of her time with Junhee, trying to flirt her way into the girl’s heart. And Junhee was Jungda’s best friend. She wouldn’t tell anything to Sehee, but Taozi… Taozi was a different story.
“Tao, my best of bestest friends, I have a mission for you!’‘
The future was looking bright.
~
The concert was a blast, everyone giving their best. Afterwards, they got their well-deserved fun - though Sehee regretted it badly the next day, fighting with giant hangover on her morning shift at the convenient store near her dorm. Rest of the weekend she spent lazying around her room, watching one too many anime episodes with Jongin and eating too much chocolate chip cookies. She also tried to catch up with her readings Sunday night so when she got to class on Monday she was more sleep than normal. Her Astro lab she spent hiding behind Minseok’s back, trying to finish her Phys 203 homework.
Now, she had a two hours break, sitting in a cozy campus café, drinking an overly sweet latte and trying to read a book and not fall asleep in the most comfy armchair ever, a plate of half eaten cheesecake Luhan, who worked here as a barista, gave her for free. “For a regular’’ he said, winking.
She called him gross and kissed him on a cheek.
“Oh, look who’s here!’‘
Sehee raised her head. Next to her chair stand Yixing, a friend she hasn’t seen in ages. They knew each other because of Taozi, Yixing helping here get accustomed to a new country when she first came here. Sehee smiled brightly and then her eyes landed on a person standing behind him.
Oh, does she have to be everywhere?
“We aren’t interrupting, right? Jungda, sit down, I haven’t seen Sehee in so long!’‘
Both girls looked startled, but when Yixing smiled and pulled a chair back for Jungda they couldn’t say anything. No one could refuse Yixing. Jungda sat down opposite to Sehee. She looked so awkward it hurt.
“Great, I’m gonna go and order, you girls have fun!’‘
The boy was gone in a second. Sehee blinked, incredulous. She was sure Yixing did it on purpose. He always seemed oblivious, so people underestimated him, but he cunningly used it to his advantage, feigning innocence after all the trouble he caused.
“Don’t worry, I can just go.’‘
Jungda’s voice pulled her out of her thoughts. The older girl looked uncomfortable.
“Whatever’’ Sehee mumbled, shrugging. ‘’Just, I don’t know, don’t say a word.’’
‘’Because, what, I will disturb the queen?’’ Jungda snorted and folded her arms on her chest. ‘’I will talk all I want whenever I want.’’
Oh my God, she was so annoying! Sehee closed the book, throwing it on the other armchair with flourish. She came there to have a good time, not to deal with sarcastic assholes who didn’t know when to shut up.
When she said it all out loud Jungda leaned to her, saying in the sweetest voice possible ‘’that’s sad, because I’m here exactly to make your life as difficult as I can.’’
And so she did. When Sehee went back to her book Jungda started taping the table with her fingernails, sending a charming smile her way when Sehee looked up, murderous. Then, she decided it was a great idea to read the whole menu aloud, asking a passing waiter to explain every drink. Sehee was feeling a headache coming.
She looked to the counter, seeking help in a form of Yixing, but he was too busy flirting with Luhan, the older male wrapped around his middle finger completely. Gross.
When, for a while, Jungda engrossed in her cellphone, getting quiet, Sehee thought that will be all for today, but then an obnoxious Girls’ Generation ringtone sounded and Jungda picked up, her voice overly sweet and loud. After a third ‘’accidental’’ kick to her shin Sehee stood up and started gathering her things. She won’t let someone so rude interrupt her quality time.
~
“Why are you so against her?’‘
Jongin and Sehee lay on her bed, her head on his stomach. She was just relating her meeting with Jungda, whining and complaining about the older girl and Yixing, the traitor, when Jongin suddenly interrupted her. Sehee raised her head and sent him a confused look.
“What do you mean?’‘
Jongin fidgeted nervously under her stare. He hoped she won’t throw him out before the promised cake and pizza.
‘’I mean, what is it that you find so annoying about her? She never caused you any harm, right? She’s just a bit mean sometimes, but as long as I’m concerned, it’s all pretty friendly.’’
Sehee furrowed her brows. What question even was that? Jungda was mean. And a smartass. First thing she sad to Sehee was “You look like a stoner.’‘. That wasn’t nice. Sehee didn’t find it friendly. Jungda was cheeky, an attention seeker. Always had to be right. Her laugh was annoying. Her voice, too. And everyone just loved her. Ugh, Sehee couldn’t take it. Everyone thought Kim Jungda was an angel.
She told him all that, her voice rising. She was seeking appreciation in his eyes, but all Jongin did was laugh. And what a laugh was that! Sehee was sure her best friend would never stop, laughing like a hyena and shaking from all of that mirth. She sat up straight and whacked him on the chest.
‘’Stop cackling, you stupid moose, what the fuck?’’
Jongin wiped a stray tear and smiled brightly at her, relaxing.
‘’You’re jealous! Oh my god, all that drama is only because you are jealous! ‘’
‘’What? No! I’m not jealous of that skinny midget! Why would I be, she’s…’‘
“Smart, pretty, funny. Popular. You see her as a potential threat!’‘
Sehee started whacking him again. She wasn’t jealous! She never thought anything positive about Kim Jungda! Jongin was delusional!
“Can’t you see how annoying she is? Why no one sees that!’‘
Jongin shook his head
“She’s cool. You would see if only you stopped fuming every time you see her. Think about it - maybe you should give her a chance.’‘
Sehee deflated. That wasn’t fair. Even her best friend was against her.
~
‘’My friends say I’m jealous of you. Tell them the truth!’’
Jungda looked startled by the sudden voice from behind her. When she turned and saw Sehee, hair in disarray, breathing heavily with a kind of fury in her eyes, she snorted. The younger girl was positively fuming. ‘’And what’s the truth?’’
Sehee sat heavily on a chair next to hers, throwing her bag at the table, not minding all the papers Jungda was currently working on. Student Council work be damned. The situation at hand was much more important. Their treasurer, a quiet kid from sophomore year named Hyuk startled at Sehee’s raised voice and now he was grabbing his things and leaving quickly, murmuring something about other things to do.
‘’That I’m not!’’
‘’Aren’t you?’’
Jungda smiled at her brightly, her eyes disappearing in little slits, corners of her mouth rising even more. Sehee wanted to punch her so hard she had to grip the edge of the table. What a cheeky little bastard!
‘’I hate you! Oh my God of course I’m not jealous why would I be!?’’
‘’If you say so.’’ Jungda shrugged, turning back to her work. She hid a smirk under her hair. ‘’Do you have that report from the last meeting I asked you for?’’
Sehee huffed and started searching through her bag. She wasn’t jealous!
‘’Do you think you cou-‘’
‘’I’m not jealous! I just don’t like you!’’
‘’Why?’’
Jungda looked at her expectantly. Her lips were drawn in a line. The raised corners of her mouth were even more visible.
“Is it wrong to just not like you?’’ Jungda raised a brow. ‘’Okay, okay, I get it. I don’t know. I just don’t.’’
The older girl smiled brightly, raising and tugging Sehee with her.
‘’Can I prove you wrong?’’
~
Oh Sehee just spent two hours with Kim Jungda alone and she was alive and breathing and not at all hurt.
Incredible.
Sehee lay on her bed, lifeless. She couldn’t believe it. That didn’t happen.
(‘’Do you want to be my friend?’’ Sehee felt like a child under Jungda’s look.
‘’No. I just don’t want to be your enemy.’’)
After Jungda dragged her out of campus they went for bubble tea. Sehee felt awkward, but Jungda was set on behaving like they didn’t fought constantly for the last 1,5 year. She told Sehee about her family and her cat, about what living with Junhee was, about how she was struggling, too, to find time for anything outside of school, job and a band. Sehee just listened, trying to suck all her tapioca balls through a straw. The older girl tried to engage her in the conversation too - she answered some question and just shook her head at the rest.
The worst part was, Jungda really seemed like a sweet girl. Sassy, yes, but cute and caring. Sehee couldn’t stop thinking it was just an act. She couldn’t be so wrong about a single person for so long. Right. Right?
She sighed, getting up, concentrated on doing something that could occupy her thoughts enough to forget about today’s afternoon.
And that’s when her phone started ringing.
‘’Hi, Taozi.’’
~
‘’WHAT?’’
Sehee gaped. Tao called an hour ago claiming she had big news about the “J mission’‘ and they had to meet immediately, so now the girls were sitting in Sehee’s dorm, Taozi’s immaculate outfit and makeup in a big contrast to the mess that was Sehee’s room. Frankly, the girl couldn’t care less. The news was indeed big.
‘’What do you mean she’s a virgin?’’
Tao rolled her eyes and gently closed Sehee’s hanging jaw. She knew her best friend would react just like that.
‘’Never had sex. One boyfriend, early high school. Nothing more.’’
‘’How is that possible?’’ Sehee sounded hysterical. ‘’Why would someone do that? Is she religious? Or, I don’t know, overly romantic?’’
‘’Sehee, you know it’s not a bad thing, right?’’ The younger girl nodded. She knew, of course, it wasn’t like she thought it was a bad thing. She was just… surprised. Jungda didn’t look like a girl shying from all those “nasty things’‘. She was pretty shameless in what she always said. ‘’Junhee says people are afraid of her. They like her, but she seems so strong and so smart all the potential interested ones are afraid to court her. You know she’s too witty for her own good. And she’s really uncomfortable with that. She just can’t find a person who could handle her. And she’s got no time for that. ’’
Sehee was… shocked. Yes. Of all the things, she never thought Jungda was scary. But she kind of could see where it came from - people, especially men, were afraid about others who were smarter. Brighter. Sharper.
But maybe she just couldn’t relax? Sehee imagined it - some guy in a club coming to flirt with Jungda. She’d probably never notice and treat him nice but just as every other person.
Taozi shook her shoulder.
‘’Please, please don’t let her know I told you, Junhee will kill me.’’
‘’Don’t worry, I’ll be as subtle as ever!’’
~
‘’Are you really a virgin?’’
Okay, subtle was never Sehee’s thing. Especially if tipsy.
They were at Luhan’s - as the Christmas was getting close, he decided to throw a Christmas party and of course invited all his friends and their moms. So now here they were, at Luhan’s balcony, 10th floor, overlooking the city shining bright at night. Behind the closed glass door the party was in a full swing, people drinking and dancing, everyone forgetting about the upcoming midterms. Sehee thought she saw Taozi climbing the table and trying to drag an unwilling Junhee with her. Jungda stood next to her, drink in her hand, some fancy looking mix. She looked cute today, Sehee thought. Her light brown hair was pulled in a messy bun, accentuating her flushed cheekbones.
When Sehee, 3 beers in, came out on the balcony and asked the question Jungda’s head raised so quick even Sehee felt dizzy.
She looked angry.
‘’What do you want, Oh?’’ she said through clenched teeth, fingers gripping the plastic cup tight. Sehee frowned.
‘’Hey, relax, I jus-‘’
‘’What, you wanna laugh at me? Is it some kind of blackmail? Who told you?’’
Sehee reached her hand to place it reassuringly on Jungda’s arm but the older girl took a step back and turned. Now the flush reached her neck, too. Sehee felt lost.
‘’I’m not going to laugh at you, there’s nothing to laugh at. I was just curious.’’
She could see Jungda flinch but the older girl still wouldn’t look at her. Someone opened the door but she only hissed at them to get the fuck out. When the party noises quieted, Sehee stepped forward to stand next to Jungda, observing the cars driving beneath them.
‘’I really just wanted to know for sure.’’
‘’Why are you so curious?’’ Jungda interrupted her. When Sehee looked at her she looked mad, but there was also fear in her eyes.
‘’Because I don’t understand.’’
“Well they told you, aren’t they? What’s new can I tell you?’’
‘’I still don’t get it. You’re hot. You could have whoever you want and yet you don’t.’’
‘’You think I’m hot?’’ At first, Jungda looked at her surprised, but then a cockish smile showed on her face. Sehee could only wait for her to whip her hair. She shrugged and laid her arms on the railing, half of her body slack and hanging out of the balcony.
‘’You are. It’s a shame I don’t like you, if not I’d woo you in an instant.’’
Jungda started to laugh and the sound normally so irritating didn’t feel that bad this time. Sehee smiled.
‘’Maybe you should try to get to know me before you decide whether I’m worth your liking’’ Jungda said wryly, taking a sip and pulling a face afterwards. ‘’Jesus, it’s too sweet to be real, Chanyeong is the worst bartender of all times.’’
‘’Yeah, she’s bad’’ Sehee sighed. ‘’You know, I’ve been thinking about it. About what Jongin told me, that maybe I really am jealous about you.’’ Sehee’s gaze was focused on the constantly flicking Christmas decoration on the building far away. She couldn’t look at Jungda right now. She couldn’t even admit it to herself - even after all the thinking it was hard to accept a simple fact that she could have been wrong and that’s why Sehee, as stubborn as ever, smiled crookedly and continued. ‘’And I still don’t think he’s right, but I’m willing to try and see whether I was wrong about you or not.’’ She waited a while for a response but when none came, she added ‘’the last time, at the bubble tea café… It wasn’t so bad. Maybe, just maybe, you are manageable. And if we were to meet on a neutral ground again, maybe I could help with the flirting problem you obviously have.’’
For a few seconds there was only silence and then Sehee heard a snort and turned to look at Jungda for the first time since her little speech. The older girl was looking at her somewhat incredulously, but also like she was trying to suppress a laugh.
‘’You guess I could maybe be nice? You little brat’’ Jungda shook her head but she smiled a little before straightening up and starting in a serious tone, frowning. ‘’How do you do this? How do you deal with all the people you sleep with?’’
‘’Are you implying I sleep around?’’ The look Jungda sent her could only be read as ‘really?’ ‘’Okay, maybe I do, a little. I don’t know. It comes natural. Sometimes I just like to be with someone and to either meet new people or get back with old friends. Sometimes it ends up in bed because it’s just a natural need.’’
‘’You need to teach me that. And I need to teach you how not to judge people because they’re prettier than you.’’ Jungda stuck her tongue out and quickly rushed back to the apartment, her tinkling laugh following her.
‘’Hey, you’re no- I haven- You little fucker!’’
~
The next few weeks, Sehee and Jungda met regularly, either for a short lunch or a coffee that turned into few hours of talking. Half of the times Sehee still got mad at Jungda, still a little distrustful, still wary and waiting for the act to drop. Jungda just patiently patted her on the head and sarcastically said that one day she will turn into a vampire and suck Sehee dry, suggestively waggling her eyebrows.
‘’You look pretty today.’’
Almost spilling her coffee, Sehee jumped in her seat, accidentally closing her game of Two Dots.
Damn, she was so close to finally winning that challenge.
She observed Jungda for a while, the other girl watching her too, carefully, attentively.
‘’Thanks?’’ she replied, unsure. She didn’t feel particularly different than every other day, but Jungda smiled, pleased, so she smiled too.
‘’And you’re really cute when you’re not trying to kill me all the time.’’
Sehee frowned when Jungda’s smile went even wider. Lately she was paying Sehee’s so much compliments there has to be something she wanted. She was much more relaxed, too - either because they were getting along pretty well or because of the “flirting with people” training Sehee was making her go through. Once in a while the two would go out in the evening, Sehee telling Jungda to just go and charm people at the bar or the club or the street - for practice. She was getting really good at that (and they had lots of free alcohol, too).
‘’You want something don’t you?’’
‘’Go out with me.’’
Sehee choked on her latte, coughing like crazy. Did she hear her right? From all the things she might suspect, that was somewhere far on the list. When Sehee got better she noticed the look on Jungda’s face was pretty uncertain. The older girl was nervously playing with a napkin, tearing it into shreds.
‘’What?’’
‘’You heard me right. Go out with me. On a date.’’
‘’Why?!’’
Jungda snorted, throwing a balled up piece of napkin at her.
‘’Because you’re cute. And you’re not afraid of talking back to me and you’re not boring, so I guess we could be good together? I don’t know, but why can’t we try?’’
Sehee looked at her suspiciously. She was sure the older girl were just joking, waiting for her to agree and then laugh at her for the eternity. But Jungda’s face was serious - so was her tone. She looked sure. Sehee felt so lost she didn’t know what to do.
‘’I hope you are perfectly aware I still sometimes want to kill you?’’ she asked slowly, as if to make sure Jungda understand. But the other girl just nodded enthusiastically.
‘’Doesn’t that make it all the more exciting?’’
Oh, she was so screwed.
Apparently, Jungda’s idea of a date was to drink cheap wine in a park and make out on the wall of her apartment. Not that there was anything to complain on.
Sehee was pinning her to the wall, the older girl’s small hands sneaking under her shirt, causing the warm skin to rise in goose bumps with how cold her palms were. They were kissing furiously, Jungda a bit sloppy and inexperienced but still good, good enough for Sehee to whine when she tugged on her lower lip with her teeth. Sehee was trying to contain her enthusiasm, but Jungda was set on doing everything her own way, tugging her in the right directions, mouthing at her jaw when her hands were busy toying with Sehee’s belly piercing. The younger laughed, grabbing the aggressive hands and leaning down to nose at her cheek.
‘’Relax, we’ve got lots of time’’ she murmured, lips travelling down the smooth line of the other girl’s neck. She could feel her pulse, quick, her labored breath at her temple. Her curious hands slid under Jungda’s dress to grab on her cute little butt. She dressed up for Sehee so nicely today, shivered in a cold weather in her thighs and a very flattering but very thin coat. Sehee called her silly. Jungda just shushed her and told her to drink more.
Jungda’s body pressed up into her, the girl gasping when Sehee’s teeth closed on her neck hard, marking her with little red bruises.
‘’That’s for making me wait for nearly an hour’’ she whispered, tugging on the collar of the dress to press even more bruising kisses down Jungda’s arms. The older girl just started to laugh, her head thrown back, eyes closed.
‘’Told you it’s much more exciting when there’s a little hate involved’’ she licked her swollen lips, making them even more shiny. Sehee wanted to taste her again.
‘’You’re sick, I swear’’ she murmured against those kitten lips, Jungda’s hands tangling in her hair, tugging her down so she wouldn’t have to stand on her toes. The girl made a keen little noise in the back of her throat when Sehee’s tongue peaked in, tangling with hers. The kiss was heated and a little desperate, Jungda already impatient, urging Sehee to go faster, to give her more.
‘’Let’s bring it to the bed’’ she whispered and immediately went for Sehee’s mouth again.
The journey to the bedroom was just a little bumpy, Jungda tugging her by the clasps of her already half-unbuttoned shirt. There was so much urgency in her movement that when Sehee laid her down, she pinned her hands to the bed and broke their kiss, looking at the older girl carefully.
‘’Hey, are you sure you want to do all this? You don’t have to rush, we can wait..’’
‘’Oh Sehee, I did 19 years of waiting, I can’t fucking wait to eat you out so can you please shut up and get back to the important things?’’ she said heatedly, tangling their legs together so Sehee would lose her balance and press their bodies together. The younger’s breath hitched, all the doubts flying away when Jungda pressed their lips together and murmured ‘’and if you won’t let me, I’ll dump you in an instant, I swear.’’
Sehee sat up on her knees, tugging her shirt all the way off and then proceeding to do just that to Jungda’s tights and dress. She couldn’t help but moan at the sight of the older girl dresses in just her underwear, ample breasts spilling out of her cups and just begging to be touched. When she licked her lips Jungda made an embarrassed sound, only now looking a bit unsure.
‘’Jesus, that’s so embarrassing’’ she whined, hiding her breast from Sehee’s view. The younger girl pouted heavily, slapping her hands away.
‘’Don’t be embarrassed, fuck, you’re so gorgeous.’’ There was a clear admiration in her voice. Jungda blushed even harder but obediently lowered her hands. ‘’I swear you’re so hot, all that cowardly jerks don’t know what they are missing.’’ Hands roaming flawless skin, muscles jumping under the attentive touch, Sehee leaned down, nosing at the swell of her breasts. She felt curious hands on her, too, sliding along collarbones and a gently curving waist, but that wasn’t the most important thing - tonight she was focused on making Jungda feel good, wanting only the best memories for her.
Besides, what was better than hearing your partner’s moans of pleasure?
‘’Hurry up’’ Jungda whispered, breath hiking when she tangled their legs together, rubbing her hips against Sehee’s clothed thigh, desperate. Her panties were soaked wet already, a pretty flush reaching her collarbones. ‘’Sehee, I need you, please hurry up’’ she moaned, bowing her back. Sehee’s senses were going into overdrive - right now she couldn’t think of anything hotter than Jungda so desperate to get off she needed to rock her hips against her.
‘’Shhh, relax, I’ve got you’’ whispering reassuringly, she unclasped Jungda’s bra, finally getting full access to her beautiful breasts. She planted kisses along the unmarred skin and when the older’s fingers started digging in her back harder, her sole attention focused on a nipple, sucking and tugging. The constant string of breathy ahs escaping Jungda’s throat was a good enough confirmation she was going in a good way.
By the time her fingers were skimming the hem on Jungda’s panties the girl was a mess, red marks littering not only her neck but her chest, too, hair in disarray, lips bitten from all those choked out moans. But the best part was about to come - Sehee’s hand reaching under her underwear, nimble fingers lightly touching Jungda’s soaked cunt. On the first touch through her slit Jungda bowed her back even more and pressed her hips into Sehee’s palms, letting out the longest and loudest moan till now. Her eyes were closed and she was breathing hard, anticipating another move. Fuck, Sehee was so wet herself just from watching her.
‘’I’m gonna pull them off, okay?’’ she asked and the other girl just nodded her head furiously, raising her hips to help.
The first rub on her clit made Jungda open her eyes, looking at Sehee with so much need she hadn’t had the heart not to give her what she wanted. Sehee pulled her hips on her lap, spreading Jungda’s legs wider and looking at her dark pink pussy, all slick and shining with arousal. The sight was mouth-watering. She couldn’t wait to get a taste of her. But for now, she focused on her clit, rubbing little circles with her thumb. Jungda was grabbing the bed sheets tight, jerking her hips, trying to make Sehee touch her more.
When Sehee slid first finger in, they both moaned at the sensation, warm slick walls effulging the girl’s digit so deliciously. Jungda was positively dripping with how wet she was. That wouldn’t take a lot of time, definitely.
‘’Fuck, you’re so tight’’ Sehee whispered with an awe. ‘’And so wet, God, I can’t believe it.’’
‘’Faster, please please please Sehee, I need you to go faster please.’’
And so Sehee did, fucking her with one, then two fingers, Jungda matching her rhythm with her jerking. She was babbling, talking about how good it felt and how she was close ‘’oh my so close just a little more Sehee please please’’ and with the addition of a thumb on her clit, fingers inside her crooking just right Jungda came, throwing her head back and screaming, her walls fluttering around Sehee’s digits, her whole body shuddering. Sehee wasn’t sure if she hadn’t blacked out for a while, boneless and so sated. After milking her orgasm, she pulled out her fingers, placing a reassuring hand on the girl’s thigh.
‘’You okay?’’
Jungda groaned and opened her eyes, a widest grin adoring her face.
‘’Never been better.’’
They stared at each other and then started laughing, Sehee lying next to the other girl, grabbing her hand with her less-soaked one, a smile probably making her look super silly but she didn’t care. Especially since she still was wet and aching and her pants were still on.
‘’So, that part about eating me out… You think I can bring it up now?’’
Jungda laughed again and climbed on her, pressing their breasts together, her hands going for Sehee’s zipper.
‘’I think I could help with that.’’
Few hours later, after another 4 orgasms and a shower they were trying to fall asleep, Jungda’s back to Sehee’s chest, the younger snuggling into a finally warm neck.
‘’Don’t think too high of yourself, I still hate you sometimes.’’
‘’Goodnight to you too, you silly brat.’’