Controlling?

[piano_diva]

Is it wrong for me to ask my husband not to do something though he enjoys it or it means something to him, if i dont like it? I feel like I'm trying to change him or control him and I dont like it, and I've told him that. He says he'll stop if I dont like it, but I dont feel it's right for me to ask him to stop... I feel guilty

Comments

[iposty]

depends on what it is..

things that will weaken your marriage are certainly reasonable to request that he desist.

However, if it's something that's not really important on the grand scheme of things and it's just your personal preference then you might want to let it go. However, I'm guessing that it's important and that's why you're asking the question.

Controlling Part 2

[piano_diva]

I posted a part two that goes into it a lot more with more detail... he thinks it's not important in the grand scheme of things, but I don't. I think it's more my religious standings and his not religious standings.

[securebell]

Depends on what the details are. I mean, if you're going to micro manage him...that's controlling. But if you macro manage him...you're respecting boundaries, but...see the big picture of the relationship. You guys just got married...if you guys try to change each other...you guys won't be the same couple when you first got married.

[piano_diva]

There's a part two to it... goes in depth about the situation