I have some thoughts tonight.
I took a panoramic picture and here's why:
As I got ready to go to bed tonight, I looked around my house and started *spacing* out looking at all my stuff, trying to think of what to take to my bedroom with me. I have such a routine, I always have. I think a lot of people do, even if they're all a bit different in the timing and what they do, it's a routime of some kind. Then I thought about the fact that much of my stuff doesn't actually have a place.
Looking around at all of the mess I live in, I wondered if my life itself is a fucking mess or not. I think that it is, but I also think that I need to lighten up a bit about how much I judge myself. I really do get after myself for things that I don't like about myself, but don't really know how to fix or change.
It's always nice to be able to take a look at how things "were" and compare them with how things "are." Not in a longing or sad way, just for the sake of contemplation. I really feel that this is a relatively difficult and stressful time of my life, but that it's time for it to be more alive and fun. It may be that the easy winter weather has been uplifting as of late (I know, the snow isn't my favorite either, but it's not nearly as prevalent as it used to be). In order to know if it's me or the weather that's making life strange, I need to be able to prove to myself that there is a change over time, and that life is getting better from now on.
So I decided to take a panoramic picture of my living room, as an experiment. There's a setting on my digital camera that helps me line up multiple shots in a row, so I can go all the way around in a circle (that looks more like a spiky rainbow shape when it's lined up). I want to log the way it looks, in all it's scattered, post tornado-esque glory and remember how it was to be me now, in a while from now.
I really like taking panoramic pictures, they're so much more "real" to me. You can see SO much more detail of the place, time and circumstances with more than just one object to look at. I love doing landcapes too, but for some reason I really like looking at pictures of the insides of people's houses, learning about who they are without seeing their faces. I prefer "lived in" houses though, like mine, where there are books and boxes and foor containers and laundry...
I guess if I think about it, a lot of college kids live in this environment. We don't have time for details like cleaning and organization, except where it counts. I have a place for everything within the mess. There are clumps of different items grouped within the room that have the same function, so you can tell where I sit to do my homework, or eat... but it's just a room.
It's something I don't like other people to see really. I don't like having a messy house with people around, but I'm just peachy by myself or with Andy. I know it's not a big deal what your house looks like, however I find it to be reflective of my character as a person, or my ability to cope with life as an adult. It truly looks like a giant bedroom in my house, not like a living room. Sure looks lived in though, heh. Interesting how we're taught to keep the living room clean, but it's supposed to be the room that the family spends a lot of time in. It's true that some families have the pretty living room that you're not allowed to go in. Interesting that those living rooms exist in houses where the family wants to maintain an outside image of their lives. It's not a living room, it's a façade room.... BAH I'm overcontemplating, I need to go to bed!
I have to take an art course as one of my last credits toward my AS, so I'm going to get back into photography. If they still offer a regualar class with a real camera (not digital) and a darkroom to play in... that would be divine. I have already taken a lot of panoramic pitures, on digital and film, and i really like them. I'd like to make time to print and frame a lot of them, just for my own house really. I like the way they look on the walls. They don't really line up in a perfect line so it's nice to use digital and a program to fit them together, but on film it still looks good all lined up in the spiky rainbow shape. It's a round world after all! More like a round lens, that distorts, or maybe the fact that I'm looking at a 3d world and putting it on a 2d surface. I may decide to post the pic of my living room from tonight once it's done. I'm sure you're all thrilled. Ok time for bed.
<3 -_-
edit: here's the panoramic
A larger version can be seen at my gallery: http://www.echoradio.org/gallery2/v/picco/Winter2005-06/LivingSpace2-1-06.jpg.html
As I got ready to go to bed tonight, I looked around my house and started *spacing* out looking at all my stuff, trying to think of what to take to my bedroom with me. I have such a routine, I always have. I think a lot of people do, even if they're all a bit different in the timing and what they do, it's a routime of some kind. Then I thought about the fact that much of my stuff doesn't actually have a place.
Looking around at all of the mess I live in, I wondered if my life itself is a fucking mess or not. I think that it is, but I also think that I need to lighten up a bit about how much I judge myself. I really do get after myself for things that I don't like about myself, but don't really know how to fix or change.
It's always nice to be able to take a look at how things "were" and compare them with how things "are." Not in a longing or sad way, just for the sake of contemplation. I really feel that this is a relatively difficult and stressful time of my life, but that it's time for it to be more alive and fun. It may be that the easy winter weather has been uplifting as of late (I know, the snow isn't my favorite either, but it's not nearly as prevalent as it used to be). In order to know if it's me or the weather that's making life strange, I need to be able to prove to myself that there is a change over time, and that life is getting better from now on.
So I decided to take a panoramic picture of my living room, as an experiment. There's a setting on my digital camera that helps me line up multiple shots in a row, so I can go all the way around in a circle (that looks more like a spiky rainbow shape when it's lined up). I want to log the way it looks, in all it's scattered, post tornado-esque glory and remember how it was to be me now, in a while from now.
I really like taking panoramic pictures, they're so much more "real" to me. You can see SO much more detail of the place, time and circumstances with more than just one object to look at. I love doing landcapes too, but for some reason I really like looking at pictures of the insides of people's houses, learning about who they are without seeing their faces. I prefer "lived in" houses though, like mine, where there are books and boxes and foor containers and laundry...
I guess if I think about it, a lot of college kids live in this environment. We don't have time for details like cleaning and organization, except where it counts. I have a place for everything within the mess. There are clumps of different items grouped within the room that have the same function, so you can tell where I sit to do my homework, or eat... but it's just a room.
It's something I don't like other people to see really. I don't like having a messy house with people around, but I'm just peachy by myself or with Andy. I know it's not a big deal what your house looks like, however I find it to be reflective of my character as a person, or my ability to cope with life as an adult. It truly looks like a giant bedroom in my house, not like a living room. Sure looks lived in though, heh. Interesting how we're taught to keep the living room clean, but it's supposed to be the room that the family spends a lot of time in. It's true that some families have the pretty living room that you're not allowed to go in. Interesting that those living rooms exist in houses where the family wants to maintain an outside image of their lives. It's not a living room, it's a façade room.... BAH I'm overcontemplating, I need to go to bed!
I have to take an art course as one of my last credits toward my AS, so I'm going to get back into photography. If they still offer a regualar class with a real camera (not digital) and a darkroom to play in... that would be divine. I have already taken a lot of panoramic pitures, on digital and film, and i really like them. I'd like to make time to print and frame a lot of them, just for my own house really. I like the way they look on the walls. They don't really line up in a perfect line so it's nice to use digital and a program to fit them together, but on film it still looks good all lined up in the spiky rainbow shape. It's a round world after all! More like a round lens, that distorts, or maybe the fact that I'm looking at a 3d world and putting it on a 2d surface. I may decide to post the pic of my living room from tonight once it's done. I'm sure you're all thrilled. Ok time for bed.
<3 -_-
edit: here's the panoramic
A larger version can be seen at my gallery: http://www.echoradio.org/gallery2/v/picco/Winter2005-06/LivingSpace2-1-06.jpg.html
