i love the spring and the fallthorn44April 3 2010, 04:15:34 UTC
but my spring moods tend to swing back and forth - up and down i like that about the seeds....maybe that is how butterflies feel when they're just about ready to leave the cocoon. winter is a very cocoon time for me.
Happy birthday!heilun_cooApril 3 2010, 11:08:04 UTC
I've never been a sunrise person. My ability to appreciate them is somewhat hindered by general urggggh and not enough coffee most of the time. I'm much more of a sunset kind of person.
I think after everything you've been through in the past how many months, a feeling of disconnect is entirely normal. It sounds like your restlessness is just like your friend said. And being extremely selfish, I'm glad. I've missed your posts *hugs*
Re: Happy birthday!pilarkristineApril 4 2010, 00:20:36 UTC
:) ((hugs)) and yum i love that photo!
somehow when i was in my 20's sunrises came easily... especially living as i was in the new mexico desert, where they were unbelievably magical. we'd drive out to these old volcanoes to catch the first bits of color peeking over the mountains behind Albuquerque. and some times, staying up all night to see the sunrise-- those were incredible twists of time! in my 30's, living at the zen temple, we'd be up earlier than the sun to meditate, but i watched the quality of the light change inside as it did so.
many good memories... i'll relish that day even more, i guess, when the healing is further along and that sense of disconnect is calmed.
For what it's worth, I can relate. Trauma changes us profoundly, and we just have to let the dust settle, however long that takes, before the spiritual returns in a conscious way; it's still there, for sure, but our emotions and minds are busy processing other things, so it's hard to realize that. I don't know if this is making any sense - I'm still waiting for my own dust to settle. :)
Plus, you're getting used to a new place, with a new personality. And maybe this is just me projecting, but I think that New England land tends to be, like its inhabitants, slow to open up and reveal itself. It too has been through a lot. Once it opens up to you, though, a lifelong relationship will surely start!
yes, totally, you said it well. i just miss it so much, i guess-- like an old friend who can't be close. and YES, you're right about new england. it's interesting-- it just makes me curious, i feel like a total foreigner, but not turned off the way i felt in MD. i rather like the mystery of it.
when i was havingthorn44April 4 2010, 05:42:01 UTC
morning meditation with coffee and watching the birds i remembered how, when i was younger, the sight or sound of the canada geese migrating in spring or fall filled me with a strong urge to fly off as well.
Re: when i was havingpilarkristineApril 5 2010, 22:31:02 UTC
:) i can identify with that! and i almost felt i *could*, last year, living along the Patuxent river in Maryland. they'd come by the hundreds, landing in the fields around us. they'd lift off as a group and it felt like they'd take me with them!
Comments 10
Reply
winter time has become even more of a cocoon time for me as well, now that we live in a colder clime...
Reply
Reply
Reply
I think after everything you've been through in the past how many months, a feeling of disconnect is entirely normal. It sounds like your restlessness is just like your friend said. And being extremely selfish, I'm glad. I've missed your posts *hugs*
Reply
somehow when i was in my 20's sunrises came easily... especially living as i was in the new mexico desert, where they were unbelievably magical. we'd drive out to these old volcanoes to catch the first bits of color peeking over the mountains behind Albuquerque. and some times, staying up all night to see the sunrise-- those were incredible twists of time! in my 30's, living at the zen temple, we'd be up earlier than the sun to meditate, but i watched the quality of the light change inside as it did so.
many good memories... i'll relish that day even more, i guess, when the healing is further along and that sense of disconnect is calmed.
Reply
For what it's worth, I can relate. Trauma changes us profoundly, and we just have to let the dust settle, however long that takes, before the spiritual returns in a conscious way; it's still there, for sure, but our emotions and minds are busy processing other things, so it's hard to realize that. I don't know if this is making any sense - I'm still waiting for my own dust to settle. :)
Plus, you're getting used to a new place, with a new personality. And maybe this is just me projecting, but I think that New England land tends to be, like its inhabitants, slow to open up and reveal itself. It too has been through a lot. Once it opens up to you, though, a lifelong relationship will surely start!
Belated happy birthday, and hugs to you!
Reply
herre's to dust settling at last, my friend :)
Reply
Reply
Reply
Leave a comment