Texts From Last GLEE! :)
Got the idea form stories written by ohladybegood. The text stolen from the site is bolded. As always, the gleeks are seniors in high school or freshman/sophomores in college. PG-13 (possibly veeery light R), genfic. :)
(Artie): Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
(Puck): just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
(Artie): well we may or may not be planning to steal a little more than wifi from the hotel next door
(Artie): namely mini shampoos and towels
(Artie): and also toilet paper. were poor.
(Puck): do i have to be sober to drive a golf cart?
(Artie): as long as you don't get caught, no
(Puck): be there as soon as i convince santana to drive me
(Artie): bribe her with drinks from the hotel bar
(Puck): nice one
(Rachel): Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
(Kurt): dont you look fabulous though?
(Rachel): INVASION OF PRIVACY
(Kurt): oh honey you needed it
(Rachel): VIOLATING MY SPACE
(Kurt): violating my eyes when i looked at you
(Rachel): PERSONAL BUBBLE
(Kurt): yeah because people in glee club have that...
(Rachel): HOW CAN I TRUST YOU TO BE MY SPERM DONOR SHOULD I NEED ONE SOMEDAY
(Kurt): i am both flattered and frightened that you think this far ahead
(Kurt): and i think the fact that i will go to such lengths to help a friend look good is a quality i want our children to have
(Kurt): also hopefully my eyebrows
(Rachel): you are insufferable
(Quinn): Why did I get a call from the hospital saying I had to come drive you home?
(Sam): youre my emergency contact, its called the emergency room quinn
(Quinn): ....why are you at the hospital?
(Sam): the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
(Quinn): you are an idiot
(Quinn): are you all okay?
(Sam): Finn has a mild concussion and broken toes, I sprained my wrist and got a lump on my head like texas, and Pucks gonna have a wicked scar on his leg and fractured his collarbone
(Sam): can you just come ge tme my head hurts and my wrist hurts and i just hurt
(Sam): oh wait i think they just said i have a concussion too
(Sam): thats funny i don't feel concussed
(Sam): is the room supposed to spin?
(Quinn): i should leave you there because of this idiocy
(Sam): quiiiiiiinnnnnnn pleaseeee
(Quinn): ill be there but i'm not happy about it
(Quinn): moron.
(Brittany): we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
(Finn): i drove a golf cart.
(Brittany): San and i have duck. his name is herman and he likes lieutenant crunch.
(Finn): it's captain
(Finn): GOLF CART HOCKEY
(Finn): wait you know how to spell leiutenant?
(Brittany): WHAT PART OF HERMAN THE DUCK DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND
(Brittany): youre just jealous that San and i had a better freshman year than you and puck
(Finn): GOLF CART HOCKEY IN THE COMMONS
(Brittany): DUCK WINS BITCH
(Brittany): and yes. i can spell lieutenant. you dont though
(Finn): oh god its the apocalypse
(Brittany): alpaca? I LOVE ALPACAS FINN WE SHOULD GET ONE
(Finn): OH MY GOD YES BEST IDEA EVER
(Artie): Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
(Puck): just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
(Artie): well we may or may not be planning to steal a little more than wifi from the hotel next door
(Artie): namely mini shampoos and towels
(Artie): and also toilet paper. were poor.
(Puck): do i have to be sober to drive a golf cart?
(Artie): as long as you don't get caught, no
(Puck): be there as soon as i convince santana to drive me
(Artie): bribe her with drinks from the hotel bar
(Puck): nice one
(Rachel): Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
(Kurt): dont you look fabulous though?
(Rachel): INVASION OF PRIVACY
(Kurt): oh honey you needed it
(Rachel): VIOLATING MY SPACE
(Kurt): violating my eyes when i looked at you
(Rachel): PERSONAL BUBBLE
(Kurt): yeah because people in glee club have that...
(Rachel): HOW CAN I TRUST YOU TO BE MY SPERM DONOR SHOULD I NEED ONE SOMEDAY
(Kurt): i am both flattered and frightened that you think this far ahead
(Kurt): and i think the fact that i will go to such lengths to help a friend look good is a quality i want our children to have
(Kurt): also hopefully my eyebrows
(Rachel): you are insufferable
(Quinn): Why did I get a call from the hospital saying I had to come drive you home?
(Sam): youre my emergency contact, its called the emergency room quinn
(Quinn): ....why are you at the hospital?
(Sam): the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
(Quinn): you are an idiot
(Quinn): are you all okay?
(Sam): Finn has a mild concussion and broken toes, I sprained my wrist and got a lump on my head like texas, and Pucks gonna have a wicked scar on his leg and fractured his collarbone
(Sam): can you just come ge tme my head hurts and my wrist hurts and i just hurt
(Sam): oh wait i think they just said i have a concussion too
(Sam): thats funny i don't feel concussed
(Sam): is the room supposed to spin?
(Quinn): i should leave you there because of this idiocy
(Sam): quiiiiiiinnnnnnn pleaseeee
(Quinn): ill be there but i'm not happy about it
(Quinn): moron.
(Brittany): we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
(Finn): i drove a golf cart.
(Brittany): San and i have duck. his name is herman and he likes lieutenant crunch.
(Finn): it's captain
(Finn): GOLF CART HOCKEY
(Finn): wait you know how to spell leiutenant?
(Brittany): WHAT PART OF HERMAN THE DUCK DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND
(Brittany): youre just jealous that San and i had a better freshman year than you and puck
(Finn): GOLF CART HOCKEY IN THE COMMONS
(Brittany): DUCK WINS BITCH
(Brittany): and yes. i can spell lieutenant. you dont though
(Finn): oh god its the apocalypse
(Brittany): alpaca? I LOVE ALPACAS FINN WE SHOULD GET ONE
(Finn): OH MY GOD YES BEST IDEA EVER