(no subject)
I was looking through my LOTR stuff last night, as I have been debating selling some of the items, and deciding what I want to keep. Many items I have were given to me by friends, but there are many more that I bought. I am appalled, in hindsight, how much I paid for them, caught up in the movie excitement and a desire to keep up with those people who have whole rooms dedicated to their collections. It failed to occur to me that most of those folks also had a large amount of disposable income, that allowed them to collect so assiduously (and that's great that they do). But as I looked around, I estimated that over a two-year period I charged nearly $2000, mostly via Ebay auctions, on items that truthfully aren't worth even a quarter of what I paid for them. One piece alone I spent almost $300 on. Before LOTR, I spent ungodly amounts of money on Beanie Babies, also overpaying for first-run bags of beans that, had I waited just a couple months, I could have gotten for a third as much. Now Beanie Babies are rotting on the shelves and I have a plastic Rubbermaid container jammed full of them-and they aren't worth anything. Instead of shopping at discount clothing stores, I went on online spending sprees at LL Bean and Chadwick's. Everytime I went somewhere, I charged SOMETHING, whether it was yet another stuffed wolf or a $25 tube of lipstick.
Six weeks ago I filed for bankruptcy, with nearly $34,000 in unsecured debt hanging over my head. I did not incur this debt because I lost my job, had uncovered medical expenses, or anything else that was beyond my control. Nope, I just bought STUFF. None of it was bad in and of itself, but it was stuff I neither could afford or needed, and over a period of time, I found myself way over my head. I wanted to pay it off the traditional way, I truly did, once I woke up one morning and realized I was in deep financial doo-doo. However, at my current rate of salary, I realized I would have to remain employed until age 73 before this stuff was paid off, even if I accrued no further debt or expenditures (impossible). I did not have the discipline to pay the cards off each month, and never learned to tell myself 'no'. My uncle and aunt warned me repeatedly back in college not to get a credit card if I couldn't control my spending, and they knew me well enough to know that would be a problem. They were right. I kept telling myself, "I'll pay it off next month...the next "three pay month", I"ll put a big payment on my bills..." I never did.
My cards are destroyed. I have my 341 meeting of creditors on June 9th, and provided none of my creditors come forward and insist on payment (I understand they hardly ever do) I will have a discharge in a few months. For the first time since I received my first credit card in college, I am paying cash for everything, and while I'm still broke, it's a good-feeling kind of broke because I know at last I am on the right path after almost a lifetime of credit abuse.
Last weekend, I put season 3 of Quantum Leap on layaway at Walmart; there were only three copies left and Walmart had it for $10 cheaper than any other DVD retailer. I will put $10 more on it next week, and pay it off two weeks after. It will still be mine, I'll still enjoy it-but I made an informed decision and I could really AFFORD to buy it in this manner.
I will probably be bombarded with credit card offers shortly after my discharge. I also will probably get another credit card, because rebuilding my credit will be an important next step. I have, however, learned what a true "emergency" is. The transmission in my car going, or my washing machine spewing water everywhere is an emergency. Buying every season of my favorite TV shows as they come out is NOT an emergency. I also do not have to keep buying 'stuff' for the people I love-another weakness I have. I had a compulsive need to earn affection by purchasing things, and finally realized that I had the affection WITHOUT the accompanying gifts. I'm not saying I've sworn off buying gifts for birthdays or anything, but I'm only spending what I have, and I'm finding that people are glad that I just REMEMBERED the occasion (or remembered eventually, LOL). I have too many friends to buy big gifts for all of them, much as I would love to. However, the best gifts I've gotten from friends were gifts that, while inexpensive to obtain, were chosen with love, and that is the guide I will follow from now on.
I am writing all this for the sake of the young ones on my list who have yet to discover the world of credit. You will need to establish credit as you get older, because no credit is sometimes as bad as bad credit. However, practice disciplined spending; don't use credit if at all possible for things you don't need or are not a true emergency or necessity, like groceries or gasoline in a pinch. If you can't afford it, or know for a fact you'll pay the balance before interest charges are accrued, you don't buy it. My grandmother had a good rule. She always said, "If you see something you want in the store, even if you have the money, walk away from it for one hour. If you still feel the same way about it in an hour, go back and get it. But 99 percent of the time, you'll find you don't want it anymore." I've started practicing that, and you know what? It works!
As an economics professor I had in college told us: "If your outgo exceeds your income, your upkeep will be your downfall." He meant simply: don't live beyond your means. I don't want any of you to have to go through what I am right now.
Six weeks ago I filed for bankruptcy, with nearly $34,000 in unsecured debt hanging over my head. I did not incur this debt because I lost my job, had uncovered medical expenses, or anything else that was beyond my control. Nope, I just bought STUFF. None of it was bad in and of itself, but it was stuff I neither could afford or needed, and over a period of time, I found myself way over my head. I wanted to pay it off the traditional way, I truly did, once I woke up one morning and realized I was in deep financial doo-doo. However, at my current rate of salary, I realized I would have to remain employed until age 73 before this stuff was paid off, even if I accrued no further debt or expenditures (impossible). I did not have the discipline to pay the cards off each month, and never learned to tell myself 'no'. My uncle and aunt warned me repeatedly back in college not to get a credit card if I couldn't control my spending, and they knew me well enough to know that would be a problem. They were right. I kept telling myself, "I'll pay it off next month...the next "three pay month", I"ll put a big payment on my bills..." I never did.
My cards are destroyed. I have my 341 meeting of creditors on June 9th, and provided none of my creditors come forward and insist on payment (I understand they hardly ever do) I will have a discharge in a few months. For the first time since I received my first credit card in college, I am paying cash for everything, and while I'm still broke, it's a good-feeling kind of broke because I know at last I am on the right path after almost a lifetime of credit abuse.
Last weekend, I put season 3 of Quantum Leap on layaway at Walmart; there were only three copies left and Walmart had it for $10 cheaper than any other DVD retailer. I will put $10 more on it next week, and pay it off two weeks after. It will still be mine, I'll still enjoy it-but I made an informed decision and I could really AFFORD to buy it in this manner.
I will probably be bombarded with credit card offers shortly after my discharge. I also will probably get another credit card, because rebuilding my credit will be an important next step. I have, however, learned what a true "emergency" is. The transmission in my car going, or my washing machine spewing water everywhere is an emergency. Buying every season of my favorite TV shows as they come out is NOT an emergency. I also do not have to keep buying 'stuff' for the people I love-another weakness I have. I had a compulsive need to earn affection by purchasing things, and finally realized that I had the affection WITHOUT the accompanying gifts. I'm not saying I've sworn off buying gifts for birthdays or anything, but I'm only spending what I have, and I'm finding that people are glad that I just REMEMBERED the occasion (or remembered eventually, LOL). I have too many friends to buy big gifts for all of them, much as I would love to. However, the best gifts I've gotten from friends were gifts that, while inexpensive to obtain, were chosen with love, and that is the guide I will follow from now on.
I am writing all this for the sake of the young ones on my list who have yet to discover the world of credit. You will need to establish credit as you get older, because no credit is sometimes as bad as bad credit. However, practice disciplined spending; don't use credit if at all possible for things you don't need or are not a true emergency or necessity, like groceries or gasoline in a pinch. If you can't afford it, or know for a fact you'll pay the balance before interest charges are accrued, you don't buy it. My grandmother had a good rule. She always said, "If you see something you want in the store, even if you have the money, walk away from it for one hour. If you still feel the same way about it in an hour, go back and get it. But 99 percent of the time, you'll find you don't want it anymore." I've started practicing that, and you know what? It works!
As an economics professor I had in college told us: "If your outgo exceeds your income, your upkeep will be your downfall." He meant simply: don't live beyond your means. I don't want any of you to have to go through what I am right now.