How long will it last, before we go insane...

[pixelicious]

Thinking about people i used to know, my eyes stare blankly outside and slowly focus on a figure that is actually standing there. As I snap back to reality, I realize it's only my neighbor, and it's only coincidence that he's wearing a black hooded sweatshirt

Comments

[iolarah]

I feel a little like you reached into my head, pulled out a little chunk of grey matter and made it talk. The comparison of knitting to food is an astute one. Knitting, eating, smoking, loving, drinking, worrying, it can all be compulsive, and maybe for some people it's a matter of finding the healthiest compulsion, the lesser of the evils. Whatever helps one get through, and certainly I feel better about spending money on knitting than on cigarettes (I quit about seven months ago). And I know what you mean about feeling guilty about spending time on it. But I try to remind myself that it's the least nasty crutch I've ever used, and if it staves off the demons and allows me to live without chemical support, then so be it. I may be a psych geek, but I'm still not keen on the idea of having to take drugs for the rest of my life just to be normal. The human brain is plastic, and I wonder sometimes if maybe I just keep working at it, maybe I can rewire myself. Maybe not, but I need to try.

[pixelicious]

this sounds egotistical, but i don't mean it as so. one thing that i think is unique about me is that i can think a lot further than most people. this is a blessing and a curse. i am already much more emotional than most people so these two combined is trouble, because i can figure out WHY i feel the way i do, and when i try to explain that to people, they don't understand, because they don't feel that way, or don't realize that they do. it's also trouble because often, i think i can figure out how and why people are feeling, but they haven't figured it out themselves

[kittenrun]

i have alot of that- usually in winter(was hoping moving to so-cal would help with that...but that didn't turn out-) something that helped me- which will be incredibly hard considering your aversion to water and your living partner's aversion to things that grow from the ground, but I laid off the caffiene and drank more water, and ate more veggies(sorry tod) and less greasy fast food- it helped with the stomach thing(it was something that my doctor suggested- laying off highly caffinated beverages and sugars and fats...she gave me a long list of scientific/medical chemical reasons, but i think i zoned out)

but the procrastinate/motivate thing i can't help with- still working on that one-

[pixelicious]

he's getting better about it, believe it or not, and trying more and more foods outside of his comfort zone. :) i acredit that fully to my awesome cooking skills. :) and i'm drinking more water (or at least trying to.) unfortunately, i have an unhealthy addiction to diet coke and just started drinking coffee on top of that... :/ trying to keep it in moderation on both accounts, however.

[kittenrun]

i will bow to you in awe if you ever can get him to eat broccoli(remembring a long wretch fest with shudders and a few "don't even joke"'s on the subject...)

if i don't have a heart attack first from the shock...

i used to have a mountain dew addiction...every once in a while i'd almost double over with stomache pains- i realised it was drinking all the dew without eating anything in between...does nasty things to the innards...

[pixelicious]

I'm a good cook.. not a miracle worker. :D

at this point, he's eating potatoes and beans occasionally, and drinking smoothies with whole real fruit and lots of juice. He'll also let me cook with tomatoes and onions. (and lots of garlic!)

Wow

[spadista]

Never left you a line before but after reading your post I felt the need. That was perhaps one of the best stream of consciousness writings I've ever read. And I read a lot. I don't know if it was intentional or not, but it can be read in a number of different layers. You should consider submitting it for publication.