Paint me happy [3/?]
Title: Paint me happy
Author: Pixziestikxz
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Fluff, angst, drama, AU
Warning: Swearing, drug usage
Pairing: TaeKey, JongHo, JongKey bffery?
A/N: Thanks to argh for the betaa~ I shall update Coffee Prince soon, I swear. I just need to finish the last chapter~
--
“Taemin, Key’s been gone for five months. Aren’t you even curious as to where he is?” Minho questioned Taemin, who was playing around with his food.
“No, I don’t care about him. Where were you? I was waiting for you here for the past fifteen minutes.”
“Well…” Minho trailed off, scratching the back of his head.
“Why do your lips look so red and swollen?” Taemin leaned over the table to observe it clearly.
“It’s nothing! I-I was…playing soccer.” Minho stated out of panic and facepalmed himself after. He knew Taemin would see through the lie.
“You were playing soccer?” Taemin raised an eyebrow in speculation. “What does that have to do with your lips?”
“Nothing, I suppose. Hey, what about Key being missing for five months? Jong Hyun tells me Key really misses you.” Minho smiled, trying to divert the topic. Taemin rolled his eyes and shook his head.
“You still talk to that skank?”
“Y-yeah, I do. He’s really nice, you know.”
“Yeah, of course he is. That was what I thought about Kibum. Then he broke my heart twice.”
“Jong Hyun isn’t like that.”
“How do you know?”
“How do you know? Taemin, just because Key did that to you doesn’t mean Jong Hyun’s like that too.” Minho’s patience was faltering, and he clenched his fists under the table to control himself.
“They’re all the same. Key and that blonde skank have probably slept with each other so much.” Taemin scoffed knowingly, sinking into his chair.
“Is that what you think? Well, to answer your question earlier, my lips are like this because I was making out with him for the first fifteen minutes of lunch!” Minho raised his voice, gripping the edge of the table to help control himself.
Taemin stared up at him, bewildered. “Well, I’m sorry for being concerned. I just really don’t want what happened to me to happen to you too.” Taemin stood up.
“Key had a reason to be acting like that. Jong Hyun told me so.”
“Jong Hyun this, Jong Hyun that. How do you know you can trust that guy so much?!”
“I don’t know. I don’t know anything. I just trust him. B-because I think….I think I’m falling in love with him.” Minho bit his lip.
Taemin sighed and patted Minho’s back. “Well, Goodluck with the blonde skank, hyung. I think just lost my appetite.” Taemin headed towards the garbage can.
“Thanks. The least you can do is visit Key, though. You might not see him soon…” Minho watched Taemin’s retreating back stop.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Taemin turned his head to look at Minho. The older one shrugged.
“He’s in the hospital right now, probably waiting for you.”
“Why is he in the hospital?”
“I thought you knew?”
“Knew what? I don’t know anything!”
“There must be a reason why Key hasn’t told you yet. I’ll leave it up to him to tell you.” Minho got up and left quickly, before Taemin could ask any more questions. The younger one stood there by himself, wondering what he missed out on.
--
“I need to see a patient here. His name is Kim Kibum.”
“Oh, he just got out this morning”
“A-are you sure? Can you check again?” Taemin asked anxiously, leaning over the counter. The receptionist stared at Taemin and nodded, but came up with the same result.
“Yeah, he got out this morning, I’m sure.”
“Oh, well, thanks anyways.” Taemin flashed the receptionist a smile, and headed back home. It’s not like it would be hard for Taemin to look for Key. If he got out of the hospital just that morning, Taemin was more than sure that he would be at home. He had already convinced himself that he didn’t care, but his curiosity got the better of him.
“You might not see him soon…”
Minho’s voice echoed inside Taemin’s head, and he wondered what Minho could have meant by that. Taemin kept his head down and continued walking, until he finally reached their street. There was a white sports car parked in front of Key’s house, and Taemin wondered whose it could be. The front door opened, and much to his surprise, Jinki stepped out, followed by Key’s mom. Taemin stood in place for a while and watched as the two exchanged casual words. Taemin wasn’t quite certain, but it looked like Key’s mom had been crying. Jinki smiled before he bowed, and headed back towards his car.
Taemin wanted to go over there and ask what was wrong. But his legs wouldn’t move him. Jinki caught sight of Taemin and bowed at his direction as well, before he disappeared into the car and drove away. Taemin was speechless for a while, standing there like a statue. He stood there long after Kibum’s mom had disappeared back in their house. When he finally got his feet to move, he immediately went inside his house. He couldn’t muster enough courage to go up there and ask what was wrong; he felt like he had no business in it.
“Taemin, is that you?”
“Yea umma, it’s me.”
“Mrs. Kim has been looking for you! She says Kibum-ah wants to see you. Haven’t you visited him in the hospital?”
“Did everyone know that he was in the hospital except for me?” Taemin questioned his mother, who shot him a questioning look back.
“I thought you would have known. You and Kibum are really close, after all.”
Taemin sighed and shook his head. “I’m going there.” He stated, as he crossed the street and climbed up the front steps of Kibum’s house.
He stared at the door, painted red with bits of paint peeling here and there. The giant Key knocker Taemin made for Kibum in metals class back in seventh grade still hung upon it. The doorknob wasn’t as shiny as it used to be, but it still brought back that feeling of nostalgia back when Taemin used to spend a lot of time in that house. Hesitantly, he lifted the knocker and let the sound echo out, waiting for a response.
The door creaked open slowly, and Taemin was greeted by Kibum’s mom. She was tired and disheveled looking, but she still plastered a smile on her face. “Taemin-ah, I’m so glad you came!” she beamed, opening the door wider. Taemin bowed slightly and entered the house, which didn’t seem to change at all for the ten years Taemin had known it.
“Kibum is in his room. I’m sure he’ll be happy to see you.” Kibum’s mother stated.
“I-if I may ask, what exactly happened to him?”
“You really don’t know?” Taemin shook his head, and Kibum’s mom placed an arm over his shoulder.
“Boy, you’ve grown. Even though you’re younger than Kibum, you’re already taller than him. I remember when you two were the same height before.” Mrs. Kim laughed dryly, and Taemin placed a smile on his face.
“Well,” she cleared her throat. “At first he told me he didn’t want to go to school. He and I argued about it continuously, but I figured that he was old enough to make his own decisions, whether they were good or bad. And I thought he only needed a little break, so I let him stay at home for about a week. But then he started getting worse. He started saying things like “kill me now.” And “I want to die.” And “I’m going to kill myself. I got worried, so I called Dr. Lee over.”
“You mean Jinki?” Taemin asked, and Mrs. Kim nodded.
“He gave Kibum some anti depressant meds, and the two seemed to get along fine, so I was happy. Kibum still refused to go to school though, and he was always gone in the afternoon. He would come back in the morning and just sleep until he left again. He didn’t even eat or anything. That went on for a month, until Dr. Lee found Kibum in an alley one day. He was drunk, passed out and naked. Dr. Lee said he overdosed on the anti depressant meds.” Kibum’s mother was on the verge of tears, and Taemin patted her back gently, but she had already started crying. “He kept on saying that we should have left him to die, that his life wasn’t worth anything anymore. He’s been in the hospital since then, but Dr. Lee said he was fine to go home today. I don’t know why he’s like this all of a sudden. Is this my fault?” she sobbed.
Taemin shook his head and wrapped his arms around her. “I’m sure it’s not, Mrs. Kim. I’ll talk to Kibum and try to make him feel better.” Kibum’s mother stopped crying and nodded, wiping her tears with the back of her hand.
“Thank you, Taemin. Kibum’s upstairs. I assume you still know the way?”
Taemin nodded and climbed up the creaky wooden stairs, walked down the hallway, and stopped at the last door on his left. Mrs. Kim was behind Taemin that whole time, her eyes following the younger one’s actions.
Kibum’s door was painted black, and Taemin stopped hesitantly when he saw it. There were two pairs of hands imprinted upon it with white paint, and underneath it scrawled “Taeminnie and Kibum” in childish handwriting. Taemin had the same thing on his door, until he insisted on painting over it three months ago. He claimed that he wanted to forget about it since he was “growing up”. He lifted his hand hesitantly, before he put it back down again. Mrs. Kim saw this, and knocked on the door herself.
“Kibum, are you awake?”
There was no response from the other side, but Kibum’s mother nudged Taemin and told him to open the door anyways. Taemin nodded, turned the knob, and pushed the door open. Kibum’s mother closed the door behind him and left the two to talk. Kibum sat cross-legged on the bed, his back facing Taemin. Kibum stared at the blank wall dryly, but he knew someone had entered the room.
“Mom, I’m not hungry, go away.”
“I-it’s me.” Taemin said quietly, but loud enough that Kibum heard it and turned around. Kibum stared at him for a few seconds, and smiled.
“Hello. Am I imagining things again? Surely you can’t be the real Taemin.”
“But I am, Kibum!”
“No, no you’re not. I’ve been conjuring you up from my imagination for this past week. You’re nothing but a figment of my imagination. You’re just here so I can have someone to talk to.” Kibum shook his head and dangled his legs off the bed.
“Okay, so talk to me. What happened to you, Kibum-hyung?”
Kibum shrugged and got off the bed. “Hey, have you seen my meds? I know they’re here somewhere. I need to take them.”
“No, Kibum. Your mother said you can’t take them anymore.”
“No godamnit! Jinki gave them to me, Jinki!” Kibum threw his pillows aside, searching for the pills. Taemin shook his head and stepped forward.
“Hyung, how did you even get overdosed? Didn’t Jinki-hyung only give you enough so you won’t kill yourself?”
“I had sex with him. After that, he pretty much gave me everything else I wanted.” Kibum shrugged. “Now where are my motherfucking pills?” Kibum rummaged around the room, and Taemin dared to step closer towards him. His eyes were threatening to spill with tears.
“Y-you slept with him? Hyung, please stop it. I don’t want you to die.” Taemin pleaded, watching as Kibum went through his drawers.
“Well I want to die, so tough luck.” Kibum opened the bottom drawer, and smiled when he pulled out a bottle of pills. He opened it and poured everything out on the floor, laughing. “Hey, look, I found them!”
“Why do you want to die, hyung?” Taemin frowned and watched Kibum carefully, making sure that he didn’t take any of the pills.
“Because my life isn’t worth anything anymore; Taemin hates my guts, and I’m going to die anyways.” Kibum smiled as he started counting the pills, putting them back in the bottle one by one.
“W-what do you mean you’re going to die? You’re not going to die, hyung! Stop saying that!” Taemin bit his lip, as he sat beside Kibum.
“Jinki said I only had three more months to live. Three months.” Kibum held out three fingers to emphasize his point as he whispered in the younger’s ear.
“T-that’s not real, hyung.” Taemin cried, holding his legs against his chest.
“Nothing is real anymore. Not you, nor myself. I’m floating between the world of the living and the fucking dead. I’m in purgatory!” Kibum declared, giggling.
Taemin shook his head and grabbed both of Kibum’s shoulders with his hands. “No, hyung, we’re real. I can very much assure you that.” Taemin took one of Kibum’s jittery hands in his, and cupped his face with the other. Taemin leaned in slowly and closed his eyes, before he touched their lips together. It was short, and soft, and light, but it was enough to make it dawn on Kibum that Taemin was really there.
“I don’t hate you, hyung. I can’t hate you.” Taemin cried as he leaned his forehead against Kibum’s. Kibum, on the other hand, sat there with eyes wide open as he brought a hand up to his lips.
“Go away. You’ve heard too much.” Kibum said softly, and Taemin was startled at his words.
“W-what are you saying, hyung?” Taemin pulled away slowly.
“Go away, I don’t like you anymore. I’ve moved on. Having sex with Jinki is more satisfying than having to protect you. Do you know how bothersome it is to do that?” Kibum scoffed, closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the bed. Lying was harder than he thought.
“Kibum-hyung, please stop lying to me! I know you won’t lie to me…” Taemin’s lip quivered, looking for answers in Kibum’s eyes. But they were stone cold and distant.
“Kibum is gone. I’m Key now.” Kibum said bluntly, and the younger one bolted out of the room, out the house, and went straight to his room. He locked the door behind him and cried himself to sleep. He didn’t understand Kibum’s sudden change in character like that. All the information was too overwhelming for him. Kibum couldn’t have been serious about him dying in three months. No, Taemin was sure it was all a lie.
--
Author: Pixziestikxz
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Fluff, angst, drama, AU
Warning: Swearing, drug usage
Pairing: TaeKey, JongHo, JongKey bffery?
A/N: Thanks to argh for the betaa~ I shall update Coffee Prince soon, I swear. I just need to finish the last chapter~
--
“Taemin, Key’s been gone for five months. Aren’t you even curious as to where he is?” Minho questioned Taemin, who was playing around with his food.
“No, I don’t care about him. Where were you? I was waiting for you here for the past fifteen minutes.”
“Well…” Minho trailed off, scratching the back of his head.
“Why do your lips look so red and swollen?” Taemin leaned over the table to observe it clearly.
“It’s nothing! I-I was…playing soccer.” Minho stated out of panic and facepalmed himself after. He knew Taemin would see through the lie.
“You were playing soccer?” Taemin raised an eyebrow in speculation. “What does that have to do with your lips?”
“Nothing, I suppose. Hey, what about Key being missing for five months? Jong Hyun tells me Key really misses you.” Minho smiled, trying to divert the topic. Taemin rolled his eyes and shook his head.
“You still talk to that skank?”
“Y-yeah, I do. He’s really nice, you know.”
“Yeah, of course he is. That was what I thought about Kibum. Then he broke my heart twice.”
“Jong Hyun isn’t like that.”
“How do you know?”
“How do you know? Taemin, just because Key did that to you doesn’t mean Jong Hyun’s like that too.” Minho’s patience was faltering, and he clenched his fists under the table to control himself.
“They’re all the same. Key and that blonde skank have probably slept with each other so much.” Taemin scoffed knowingly, sinking into his chair.
“Is that what you think? Well, to answer your question earlier, my lips are like this because I was making out with him for the first fifteen minutes of lunch!” Minho raised his voice, gripping the edge of the table to help control himself.
Taemin stared up at him, bewildered. “Well, I’m sorry for being concerned. I just really don’t want what happened to me to happen to you too.” Taemin stood up.
“Key had a reason to be acting like that. Jong Hyun told me so.”
“Jong Hyun this, Jong Hyun that. How do you know you can trust that guy so much?!”
“I don’t know. I don’t know anything. I just trust him. B-because I think….I think I’m falling in love with him.” Minho bit his lip.
Taemin sighed and patted Minho’s back. “Well, Goodluck with the blonde skank, hyung. I think just lost my appetite.” Taemin headed towards the garbage can.
“Thanks. The least you can do is visit Key, though. You might not see him soon…” Minho watched Taemin’s retreating back stop.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Taemin turned his head to look at Minho. The older one shrugged.
“He’s in the hospital right now, probably waiting for you.”
“Why is he in the hospital?”
“I thought you knew?”
“Knew what? I don’t know anything!”
“There must be a reason why Key hasn’t told you yet. I’ll leave it up to him to tell you.” Minho got up and left quickly, before Taemin could ask any more questions. The younger one stood there by himself, wondering what he missed out on.
--
“I need to see a patient here. His name is Kim Kibum.”
“Oh, he just got out this morning”
“A-are you sure? Can you check again?” Taemin asked anxiously, leaning over the counter. The receptionist stared at Taemin and nodded, but came up with the same result.
“Yeah, he got out this morning, I’m sure.”
“Oh, well, thanks anyways.” Taemin flashed the receptionist a smile, and headed back home. It’s not like it would be hard for Taemin to look for Key. If he got out of the hospital just that morning, Taemin was more than sure that he would be at home. He had already convinced himself that he didn’t care, but his curiosity got the better of him.
“You might not see him soon…”
Minho’s voice echoed inside Taemin’s head, and he wondered what Minho could have meant by that. Taemin kept his head down and continued walking, until he finally reached their street. There was a white sports car parked in front of Key’s house, and Taemin wondered whose it could be. The front door opened, and much to his surprise, Jinki stepped out, followed by Key’s mom. Taemin stood in place for a while and watched as the two exchanged casual words. Taemin wasn’t quite certain, but it looked like Key’s mom had been crying. Jinki smiled before he bowed, and headed back towards his car.
Taemin wanted to go over there and ask what was wrong. But his legs wouldn’t move him. Jinki caught sight of Taemin and bowed at his direction as well, before he disappeared into the car and drove away. Taemin was speechless for a while, standing there like a statue. He stood there long after Kibum’s mom had disappeared back in their house. When he finally got his feet to move, he immediately went inside his house. He couldn’t muster enough courage to go up there and ask what was wrong; he felt like he had no business in it.
“Taemin, is that you?”
“Yea umma, it’s me.”
“Mrs. Kim has been looking for you! She says Kibum-ah wants to see you. Haven’t you visited him in the hospital?”
“Did everyone know that he was in the hospital except for me?” Taemin questioned his mother, who shot him a questioning look back.
“I thought you would have known. You and Kibum are really close, after all.”
Taemin sighed and shook his head. “I’m going there.” He stated, as he crossed the street and climbed up the front steps of Kibum’s house.
He stared at the door, painted red with bits of paint peeling here and there. The giant Key knocker Taemin made for Kibum in metals class back in seventh grade still hung upon it. The doorknob wasn’t as shiny as it used to be, but it still brought back that feeling of nostalgia back when Taemin used to spend a lot of time in that house. Hesitantly, he lifted the knocker and let the sound echo out, waiting for a response.
The door creaked open slowly, and Taemin was greeted by Kibum’s mom. She was tired and disheveled looking, but she still plastered a smile on her face. “Taemin-ah, I’m so glad you came!” she beamed, opening the door wider. Taemin bowed slightly and entered the house, which didn’t seem to change at all for the ten years Taemin had known it.
“Kibum is in his room. I’m sure he’ll be happy to see you.” Kibum’s mother stated.
“I-if I may ask, what exactly happened to him?”
“You really don’t know?” Taemin shook his head, and Kibum’s mom placed an arm over his shoulder.
“Boy, you’ve grown. Even though you’re younger than Kibum, you’re already taller than him. I remember when you two were the same height before.” Mrs. Kim laughed dryly, and Taemin placed a smile on his face.
“Well,” she cleared her throat. “At first he told me he didn’t want to go to school. He and I argued about it continuously, but I figured that he was old enough to make his own decisions, whether they were good or bad. And I thought he only needed a little break, so I let him stay at home for about a week. But then he started getting worse. He started saying things like “kill me now.” And “I want to die.” And “I’m going to kill myself. I got worried, so I called Dr. Lee over.”
“You mean Jinki?” Taemin asked, and Mrs. Kim nodded.
“He gave Kibum some anti depressant meds, and the two seemed to get along fine, so I was happy. Kibum still refused to go to school though, and he was always gone in the afternoon. He would come back in the morning and just sleep until he left again. He didn’t even eat or anything. That went on for a month, until Dr. Lee found Kibum in an alley one day. He was drunk, passed out and naked. Dr. Lee said he overdosed on the anti depressant meds.” Kibum’s mother was on the verge of tears, and Taemin patted her back gently, but she had already started crying. “He kept on saying that we should have left him to die, that his life wasn’t worth anything anymore. He’s been in the hospital since then, but Dr. Lee said he was fine to go home today. I don’t know why he’s like this all of a sudden. Is this my fault?” she sobbed.
Taemin shook his head and wrapped his arms around her. “I’m sure it’s not, Mrs. Kim. I’ll talk to Kibum and try to make him feel better.” Kibum’s mother stopped crying and nodded, wiping her tears with the back of her hand.
“Thank you, Taemin. Kibum’s upstairs. I assume you still know the way?”
Taemin nodded and climbed up the creaky wooden stairs, walked down the hallway, and stopped at the last door on his left. Mrs. Kim was behind Taemin that whole time, her eyes following the younger one’s actions.
Kibum’s door was painted black, and Taemin stopped hesitantly when he saw it. There were two pairs of hands imprinted upon it with white paint, and underneath it scrawled “Taeminnie and Kibum” in childish handwriting. Taemin had the same thing on his door, until he insisted on painting over it three months ago. He claimed that he wanted to forget about it since he was “growing up”. He lifted his hand hesitantly, before he put it back down again. Mrs. Kim saw this, and knocked on the door herself.
“Kibum, are you awake?”
There was no response from the other side, but Kibum’s mother nudged Taemin and told him to open the door anyways. Taemin nodded, turned the knob, and pushed the door open. Kibum’s mother closed the door behind him and left the two to talk. Kibum sat cross-legged on the bed, his back facing Taemin. Kibum stared at the blank wall dryly, but he knew someone had entered the room.
“Mom, I’m not hungry, go away.”
“I-it’s me.” Taemin said quietly, but loud enough that Kibum heard it and turned around. Kibum stared at him for a few seconds, and smiled.
“Hello. Am I imagining things again? Surely you can’t be the real Taemin.”
“But I am, Kibum!”
“No, no you’re not. I’ve been conjuring you up from my imagination for this past week. You’re nothing but a figment of my imagination. You’re just here so I can have someone to talk to.” Kibum shook his head and dangled his legs off the bed.
“Okay, so talk to me. What happened to you, Kibum-hyung?”
Kibum shrugged and got off the bed. “Hey, have you seen my meds? I know they’re here somewhere. I need to take them.”
“No, Kibum. Your mother said you can’t take them anymore.”
“No godamnit! Jinki gave them to me, Jinki!” Kibum threw his pillows aside, searching for the pills. Taemin shook his head and stepped forward.
“Hyung, how did you even get overdosed? Didn’t Jinki-hyung only give you enough so you won’t kill yourself?”
“I had sex with him. After that, he pretty much gave me everything else I wanted.” Kibum shrugged. “Now where are my motherfucking pills?” Kibum rummaged around the room, and Taemin dared to step closer towards him. His eyes were threatening to spill with tears.
“Y-you slept with him? Hyung, please stop it. I don’t want you to die.” Taemin pleaded, watching as Kibum went through his drawers.
“Well I want to die, so tough luck.” Kibum opened the bottom drawer, and smiled when he pulled out a bottle of pills. He opened it and poured everything out on the floor, laughing. “Hey, look, I found them!”
“Why do you want to die, hyung?” Taemin frowned and watched Kibum carefully, making sure that he didn’t take any of the pills.
“Because my life isn’t worth anything anymore; Taemin hates my guts, and I’m going to die anyways.” Kibum smiled as he started counting the pills, putting them back in the bottle one by one.
“W-what do you mean you’re going to die? You’re not going to die, hyung! Stop saying that!” Taemin bit his lip, as he sat beside Kibum.
“Jinki said I only had three more months to live. Three months.” Kibum held out three fingers to emphasize his point as he whispered in the younger’s ear.
“T-that’s not real, hyung.” Taemin cried, holding his legs against his chest.
“Nothing is real anymore. Not you, nor myself. I’m floating between the world of the living and the fucking dead. I’m in purgatory!” Kibum declared, giggling.
Taemin shook his head and grabbed both of Kibum’s shoulders with his hands. “No, hyung, we’re real. I can very much assure you that.” Taemin took one of Kibum’s jittery hands in his, and cupped his face with the other. Taemin leaned in slowly and closed his eyes, before he touched their lips together. It was short, and soft, and light, but it was enough to make it dawn on Kibum that Taemin was really there.
“I don’t hate you, hyung. I can’t hate you.” Taemin cried as he leaned his forehead against Kibum’s. Kibum, on the other hand, sat there with eyes wide open as he brought a hand up to his lips.
“Go away. You’ve heard too much.” Kibum said softly, and Taemin was startled at his words.
“W-what are you saying, hyung?” Taemin pulled away slowly.
“Go away, I don’t like you anymore. I’ve moved on. Having sex with Jinki is more satisfying than having to protect you. Do you know how bothersome it is to do that?” Kibum scoffed, closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the bed. Lying was harder than he thought.
“Kibum-hyung, please stop lying to me! I know you won’t lie to me…” Taemin’s lip quivered, looking for answers in Kibum’s eyes. But they were stone cold and distant.
“Kibum is gone. I’m Key now.” Kibum said bluntly, and the younger one bolted out of the room, out the house, and went straight to his room. He locked the door behind him and cried himself to sleep. He didn’t understand Kibum’s sudden change in character like that. All the information was too overwhelming for him. Kibum couldn’t have been serious about him dying in three months. No, Taemin was sure it was all a lie.
--