Round Two

[plasticprophet]

The heart is a funny thing. Not the chunk of matter inside my chest: that concerns me very little. Fate gives life and takes it away, it isn't my place to question or be concerned by it. But the other heart... I'm quite interested in that. Love is entirely determined and guided by chance, it seems. Or perhaps it is simply an end product of

Comments

[outofservice]

Love truely is a double edged sword. Its the most beautiful and amazing feeling in the world yet it reduces you to feeling of utter worthlessness.

I must say that I have found that not to require the love of others helps alleviate the pain and worthless feeling. I choose to love without limits, regardless if I am loved in return. Its not a picnic of course, it sucks quite a bit, but I find to focus on my love for others keeps me from thinking about their lack of love for me

[plasticprophet]

Sounding quite a bit like I did four years ago. And for the most part, what you describe is exactly how I approach it. However, there is one love that I can't let be like that. I've tried to deny it, been in utter denial of the very thing that seems to have lodged itself near the very core of my psyche, and as a result of not accepting and embracing these feelings, I have become rotten. But even with so small an act as writing these feelings in some silly digital journal, I have given these feelings permission to exist. I have validated them within myself, and as a result, begun to release them. Sweet release, never ending, giving breath to what once was stifled. It feels like freedom. Even though the circumstance and reasons for the pain of this forbidden love have not been changed, the acknowledgement that I do in fact have this desire is helping pave the way to an eventual cease-fire in the war raging inside me.

Love is perhaps the most tragic thing about our human experience.