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Sometimes when I say something is 'gay', actual homosexuals become offended at the fact that I used the term. When I consider this, it seems like there has been some sort of misunderstanding since I usually don't mean that whatever I was talking about was homosexual - it just happens to be a homonym. Just as when the word 'sick' is used as slang
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It's not so much the intent as much as the implications that make "gay" a word to stay away from when you mean uncool.
While being gay doesn't seem like such a big deal for 20somethings living in Toronto nowadays, it's good to keep in mind that that was not the case when we were growing up and it's not the case for teenagers now. Most of us faced discrimination growing up so we adapted to this sense of being unaccepted. And mind you, visibly gay people still face things like job related discrimination and even fear walking alone at night.
From my perspective saying something's gay is a pretty minor offense, but it's always a good idea to respect your friends taking offense to the word. Just because you didn't mean it doesn't mean it's harmless.
Besides there are tons of other words you can use instead.
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I think the big difference between using gay and sick is that sick does not also describe a group of people. Like saying something is so retarded (but not meaning to insult the mentally challenged) or so black (but not wanting to insult people of colour).
So while you don't see it as that big a deal to use it, I don't see it as that big a deal to use something else. Because even though the word doesn't mean anything insulting to you personally, it doesn't mean that it doesn't to other people.
Hope that didn't take on too much of a lecture-y tone; in the grand scheme of life I agree it's a pretty minor offense. It's just something I've taken time to think about.
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