Comments | poetinplaid: (без темы)

poetinplaid

(Untitled)

Apr 22, 2005 18:42

it's strange ( Read more... )

Comments 10

rambling of a lonely person anonymous April 23 2005, 02:01:14 UTC

I used to do that. Not with boys so much as just situations that went really bad. I would think of something at night, while I was trying to go to sleep, that happened years ago and try to make it better. Crying infront people, saying no but it still end up happening, freezing up on stage. Once I was set up on a blind date and the guy attacked me, he was stupid and I'm actaully not sure if he realized wht he did was wrong. All I did was scream. I was so disappointed in myself (luckily it was close enough to my house that my dad came heard and came out, he made the guy leave). But the point is, is that for a long time I would think back, I should have kicked him, I should have elbowed him, I should turned around and DDTed him on the concrete! (I watch a lot of wrestling) or something. I would think about it till I cried, fall asleep and then have nightmares about it. Finally I have realized that I can't change it, the past I mean. I don't know how I got around these times of beating myself up but I am really glad. It's a good thing ( ... )

Hello blueyedbaroness April 23 2005, 02:14:21 UTC

Hi, i noticed you added me to your friends list, and that you're into poetry, so I'm guessing you looked at my allpoetry profile?

Re: Hello poetinplaid April 23 2005, 03:10:18 UTC

actually, you're on nikki's friends list.
and i saw you on the hr community.
and then i saw that you're an english major and bookseller just like me. so i wanted to comment on your journal but you have it so that only those on your page can comment, so i added you in hopes that sooner or later i'd be able to comment to at least say hi.
so yeah, hi!
and awesomeness for the am lit.

Re: Hello blueyedbaroness April 23 2005, 15:58:46 UTC

ok, that's cool. i'll go ahead & add you. sounds like we have quite a bit in common =)
Did you go to CNU, by any chance (since you know Nikki)? I went there for half of my freshman year.

blueyedbaroness April 24 2005, 04:04:54 UTC

by the way, in response to the actual post as well as my previous comment, my allpoetry site is: http://storywrite.com/poets/Aedia%20Bluefire
or you can go to www.allpoetry.com & seach me by user name Aedia Bluefire. are you on AP?

anonymous April 23 2005, 03:23:28 UTC

he hasn't gotten away so much as i've never actually had him. he's one of my closest friends, and we've both acknowledged that we have some kind of feelings for each other...but that's about it. it doesn't help that we live several hundred miles apart so we don't have the greatest chance to figure out just what it is we feel. add to that that i'm halfheartedly attached to someone else, and he's living with someone that he looks on as no longer being his girlfriend, and she still believes that they -are- a pair. hell, maybe they are; he's never been the best at knowing for sure what he feels for somebody, and has been known to suddenly declare that he'd been harboring feelings for somebody he broke up with years before. it's all stupid and screwy and i wish i didn't feel as much as i did, so i could just forget it and be satisfied with our friendship. the thing is, i'm already pretty sure that we wouldn't work on a permanent/long-term basis. but i also know that we'd have a hell of a good time while it lasted, and it makes me sad ( ... )

anonymous April 23 2005, 04:19:59 UTC

I've had two loves of my life. Don't know if I held such an equal title in their lives as they had in mine, but that is how I felt. They both are in love now with new guys. Both engaged to boot. Though I still have some contact with them, I still yearn for their touch, that warm look, the feeling that I was for them and they for myself. Now I am not the type of person to waste my time obessively thinking about what if and what could of been. I have dated each, but in the back of head, I still feel for them. Unfortuantely, my most recent really hit me hard. I feel immediately in love with her, but I couldn't hold on to her. I didn't spend enough time with her, so she found someone who could. I'm not going to say that I wish them the best, and all of that. But I do hope that he makes her happy. Because if he doesn't I have no problem breaking his kneecaps.

anonymous April 23 2005, 04:48:26 UTC

I made the mistake of falling in love with my best friend. Obviously, if nothing has happened in the last six years, nothing will, but, especially as of late, it feel as if someone is twisting a rusty nail into my heart every time she gets a boyfriend.