jentend ton coeur - I hear your heart.
On the way home from work today, on the bus, I felt this incredible sense of anger, rage. This incredible feeling of being trapped. But, the feeling was not coming from within. I couldn't really pinpoint who it was coming from, but I suspect it was someone on the bus. It got worse from downtown until east liberty, dissipated for a while, and then got worse again when we got off the busway onto the rural roads. At both peaks, it drove me literally to the worst of the sad. I was on the bus, and began to well up in tears.
I felt that if I could just look around and pay attention, I would find that person who was so in need. I felt that sense of awe, that immaculate connection that happens when we just look around for someone who might be in need of a little understanding. Someone who just needs to be payed attention to, if only for a few seconds. Someone who is in such dire need, even a kind smile and a kind word would make a world of difference. I pictured that there must be thousands and thousands of those kinds of someones all around me.
But, I am on the bus. I looked. And I looked. I wasn't sure exactly who it was. I had a couple of suspects in mind, but I had no idea how to move to where they were in the enclosed extremely tightly packed sardinic bus-can, and I just wouldn't know where to begin.
I know that feeling of being trapped, and being angry. I know it so well that I felt extreme sadness and empathy for whomever it was. I wanted to grab that person, talk to them and tell them that everything would be ok, that it would all work out. I wanted to tell them that they didn't need to feel so angry, they didn't need to think these things, or do what they felt they needed to do next. I wanted to turn them around, point the direction, and even show them the way.
But mostly I wanted to cry for them, and to cry with them.
I don't know who it was...
but whoever this person was,
I could feel their heart.
♥
I felt that if I could just look around and pay attention, I would find that person who was so in need. I felt that sense of awe, that immaculate connection that happens when we just look around for someone who might be in need of a little understanding. Someone who just needs to be payed attention to, if only for a few seconds. Someone who is in such dire need, even a kind smile and a kind word would make a world of difference. I pictured that there must be thousands and thousands of those kinds of someones all around me.
But, I am on the bus. I looked. And I looked. I wasn't sure exactly who it was. I had a couple of suspects in mind, but I had no idea how to move to where they were in the enclosed extremely tightly packed sardinic bus-can, and I just wouldn't know where to begin.
I know that feeling of being trapped, and being angry. I know it so well that I felt extreme sadness and empathy for whomever it was. I wanted to grab that person, talk to them and tell them that everything would be ok, that it would all work out. I wanted to tell them that they didn't need to feel so angry, they didn't need to think these things, or do what they felt they needed to do next. I wanted to turn them around, point the direction, and even show them the way.
But mostly I wanted to cry for them, and to cry with them.
I don't know who it was...
but whoever this person was,
I could feel their heart.
♥