WordContest 2004.06.24 (Results)

[poormattie]

Below are the winning definitions from the devilish definition contest in honor of Ambrose Bierce.

All the entries I had were quite funny, but I've narrowed it to my favorites.

• weblog (n.):
  A device used by the jejune to record the picayune. [by alarmist]
• terrorism (n.):
  Violence, or the threat of violence, against the incumbent. [by jorend]
• NASA (n.):
  A government agency dedicated to going in circles and staring into space, distinguished from other government agencies by the letters "NASA" in its name. [by jorend]
• reboot (v.):
  A panacea hawked by snake-oil salesmen as a sure-fire cure for whatever ails our computers (and thus, ourselves). [by alarmist]

All of the suggestions for "credit card" were great, and I'll let you vote for the one you like:

1. credit card (n.):
   An instrument similar to a cornucopia, but with consequences.
2. credit card (n.):
   The ticket used by the holy to get into heaven. This is done by swiping the credit card through a "credit card machine" at your local church many many times, until the church has decided that you are holy enough to get into heaven.
3. credit card (n.):
   A pocket-sized debt collector used by companies to make money off of your desire for convenience.
4. credit card (n.):
   An item of great interest.
5. credit card (n.):
   The result of thousands of years of time and effort spent trying to find ways to defeat the Law of Conservation.