What is A Birthday?
This is the first year I can remember where I didn't do an obsessive countdown to my birthday.
It's not as if birthdays have been a big thing in my family: we celebrate them, but parties and big to-dos are the exception rather than the norm.
But I always count the days, look at my mum and say "Guess what?" and tell her down to the minute when my birthday is coming.
Not this year.
I don't know if it's a product of growing up, or just that birthdays aren't really that exciting anymore. If I want to do anything, I have to plan it, and then usually I would have to clean up. As an adult birthdays mean the same thing as every other day.
I used to take vacation time, and plan a day for myself, but with not a lot of social life, it usually involved me and Netflix or going out and wandering a bookstore or seeing a movie. Something quiet and unremarked, because going out with a bunch of friends and wearing a button/hat/sash proclaiming yourself as a birthday girl is stupid fun, but going out by yourself and telling everyone it's your birthday seems a bit desperate.
I actually kind of like the quiet birthday. Sometimes I'll go out to breakfast with my mum, or we'll do something for dinner. My middle sister and I usually go to a movie within that week. I get lots of well wishes on social media and the day passes. It's nice.
The party/big fuss would be okay too. I do sort of miss the fun of a cake and bad singing and present opening, but I think fun can come in all sorts of shapes.
Sometimes it is the party, and sometimes its a day where everyone says hello.
I may not have counted to my birthday this year, but it came anyway, and I think I'll take it as it comes.