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[poptartodoom]

The phone rings, but I don't want to answer it.

Mom's left two messages on Facebook telling me she loves me. She's left a couple messages on my phone to check in, and says she loves me.

I haven't heard "I'm sorry I said those horrible things to you."

I doubt I will. And that hurts more than anything in the world.

Comments

[playswithworms]

*hugs*

[caiusmajor]

*hugs lots*

[calibrata]

*hugs*

[virginia_fell]

As far as I can tell, she does love you.

Granted, she loves you the way that I love egg bagels and compliments on my hair or really pretty dice. I mean it when I say I love those things, but the difference between me and your mother is that I am capable of understanding that other people are actual real whole people with an existence independent from me.

I do not think your mother is capable of this.

That is not your fault.

She is not this way because of any lack in you. She is this way because her ability to feel emotion and relate to people is innately broken.

I'm obviously not qualified to make any diagnoses here (though I sure as hell hope someone who is qualified will do that at some point because seriously she is not fuckin' well), but a lot of what's on this site generalizes really well.

Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers has a great section on narcissistic supply (though you should probably ignore the woo on the site about changing your emotions by manipulating your energy field or wtfever). The article on narcissistic