I know I read too much into these things, but...
... it's kind of hard to explain otherwise, especially considering my predisposition toward belief in things that feel right. (After all, where could that feeling have come from? And why did it feel so right?)
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Here's your question for the week: What's the difference between deluded self-esteem that leads you to waste your time on impossible dreams and well-justified self-esteem that inspires you to seek a viable goal that's beyond your previous level of accomplishment? An example of the first is the Louisiana State University student who declared himself eligible for the National Basketball Association's draft, although he wasn't even good enough to play on his college team. An example of the second is my talented musician friend Allie, who made a demo CD in her home studio and brazenly sent it to a big record company executive, who liked it so much he signed her to a recording contract.
I know it's not exactly inspirational, in the majestic, overwhelming, Layla-guitar-solo, Zeppelin-IV kind of way. (Sorry, halfway through Hornby's Songbook. I had to read The Stranger first. Maybe that's half the point, but the other half's more important.) It doesn't use Brezsny's usual shock tactics to show you the ways life has already sneaked (snuck? snook?) in your mind's back door. Hell, it doesn't give you much in the way of advice, either. Unless you're a talented musician. Then, your bases are covered. What it does do: identify the single most important question that I haven't bothered (or been smart enough, or really wanted) to ask myself.
If I wasn't so exhausted, I'd make my case with salient points and countless examples, but take my word for it: through perfect hindsight, any event of any significance in the past 3 days has carried its own reflection of the Question, twinkling with a little reminder to take inventory of it, weight it, sniff it, and put a price on it. Give it a Number for an answer. Yes, a Number, a metric to help me separate the worthwhile causes from the pointless diversions. Only a Number can have the infinitely sharp smoothness needed to divide the subjective stream of data about feelings. (Yes, I saw Hitchhiker's. Yes, 42 sounds like a good number. It is not the number. Believe me, I tried.) The only difference between the two "examples" Brezsny cites is talent, the special something that makes the foolish "brazen" and cordons its possessors off from the horde of those not "good enough." So... how good is good enough? Now, that's the question I've never been able to answer. Time to start trying.