Natalie Finch

[potcsues]

Sorry about the sporadic Sueage lately, been having some time constraints. I should be back to my normal reporting schedule next week if not sooner.

And now for some pimping. If you haven't already go and read araeph's latest PPC. The fic was horrific and the PPC is hilarious. And you should also go and take a look at wolfychan's wonderful MST of "Changeling?"

Comments

[mylla]

Is Mr. Gibb's left big toe.

I would so read that.

As for this Sue... oh, she irritates me in all the usual ways. We need a pre-recorded message to play for the Suethors:

"No, your character is not witty. No, you shouldn't announce POV changes in the middle of text. Yes, the slapping joke is old. No, we don't care any more about your character just because you've contrived an OMG TEH ANGSTy past for her. Yes, logic is a good thing."

It could go on. We could just play the relevant parts for each fic.

“Well... Ye can swab th’ deck an’ do th’ washin’. Or, ye could cook.” He grinned.

‘Smug git’ I narrowed my eyes. ‘He’s really enjoying this. Well, I’ll show him!’

“I’ll do both Captain Sparrow.”

‘Ha! That’s got him!’

"Ha! I've now agreed to do more work than he wanted me to! That'll show him!"

[princesskraehe]

Wow ... it'd be like ... Midori no Left Toe. I'd read that, too! If only because Gibb would step on her constantly. And maybe stub her against something.

That, and there's no way [emphatic Eddie Izzard wave] that Jack would ever make out with Gibb's left toe. No, not even in the middle of nowhere, not even if Anamaria was pulling a Lysistrata on him for whatever he's done this week.

[mylla]

That, and there's no way [emphatic Eddie Izzard wave] that Jack would ever make out with Gibb's left toe.

The mental images! They burn!

[tempuratantrum]

I don't care how much of a PotC fan you are, but who on this bloody good earth's 'last words' are 'Yo ho, yo ho, a pirates life for me'? And without punctuation, still. I've seen the movie 108 times, and if I ever considered killing myself, that's a far cry from what (I think) even Jack himself would say, if given the chance to talk at that particular time (unlikely)...This was probably the least offensive thing that could irk me, but it still does, probably more than poor, raped Jack. His tolerance of bitchy, annoying teenage girls is honorable in the least...

Gar, I'm rambling. In short: No. Just, no.

[salophile]

Really? You've seen it 108 times? And I thought I was obsessed, seeing FOTR ten times in the cinema...

[tempuratantrum]

Yeah, I have. Well, 109 now. I saw it twelve in theatres...would've been more, but my family refuses loans and I ran out of money...I'm pretty pathetic, but proud to say not as pathetic as this Sue.

[laurelin_kit]

I know someone who would. BELIEVE ME.

[anonymous]

My last words would be something along the lines of "Oh shi-" CRUNCH.

I have to admit, this is one of the stupidest things I've had the misfortune to read.

[mordoriannazgul]

This fic deserves a new word made by yours truely.

Natalie Finch and her story are absolutely CRAPALISCIOUS.
I kinda like that word. I think I'll keep using it. Because it can really apply to a lot of things, but mostly this story.

How does 'rabid fangirl committing suicide' equate to 'landing on the Pearl and treating the captain like dirt'? Could someone explain this to me, or is it just one of those Mary Sue Logic things that I wouldn't understand anyway?

Huh. I think I discovered the biggest oxymoron of all time, next to Microsoft Works. Mary Sue Logic.

[eyeteeth]

Maybe this is an "Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge" kind of thing and the whole thing is a vivid hallucination taking place in the last few seconds before Sue's death.

[angelilluminati]

Eeee! One of my all-time favorite stories. ^_^

O.o Thank you. I think I just got ideas.

-bows profusely and scrambles off to write-

[rainbowjehan]

On behalf of my half-sister Natalie, *SPORK*

*hopes 'Sue writhes in the agonising pain of sporkdom through the heart*