And then there was light.
Or rather, there was the first entry. And the computer gods saw that it was good.
This is one of Albus' more creative ideas, I must say. After the disaster of last year, it is generally agreed that it could be a good idea to expand open communication between the wizarding and Muggle worlds.
Please bear in mind that this is the official spiel that we are supposed to give when questioned about it. All those literate enough to sign an X as their name are required to keep up one of these online journals. I am slightly amused that even the untouchable Malfoy family must also submit to this new law. Well, in soft-speak, "law" is such a strict and rigid term. They much prefer "suggestion" to "law". So, here I am following their "suggestion".
This is entirely on Albus' stooped shoulders. If he was not so certain that this would end the clear division among the wizarding populace - well, there is nothing for it, I suppose.
There is, however, a silver lining to the dark cloud of journaling gloom. This will log the time that you submit journal entries, so that if, years down the road, I am called into question at the Wizengamot for one thing or another, I can pull these old time stamp logs and say, "Apologies, your honour, I was too busy typing about ignorant Gryffindors to rob Gringotts."
I think that the trick to not being completely disgusted with red tape is to look for the supposed less dark side of things. You never know when you can be brought up on charges of robbing a bank or a pawn shop.
I once saw a Muggle documentary about this man who was constantly identified as a rapist. Many times over. Of course, as fate would have it, the man was innocent and the real criminal was running loose, free to commit these crimes repeatedly. Finally, said innocent man began to keep a journal. His reasoning was that if he had a journal entry at the time of the alleged sexual assault, he would establish an alibi. Consequently, this journal became a self-imposed exile.
He would journal everything from the fantastic or the mind-numbingly mundane. If he happened to be watching "television", he would document in detail the episode or movie he was viewing. If he were to go to the market, he would log what time he left his house, the mileage put on his car, and enclose a receipt in the entry, preferably time stamped.
While in the end, this did help him rebut charges of sexual assault several times, you have to wonder if he should consider himself lucky that he preserved his freedom - to write yet more journal entries. At least I can admire the man's discipline.
I suppose I am really saying that I resent having to keep an online journal. I resent having to join a "community" with my peers, students, and others. My thoughts should be my own. They should be private. However, in this day and age, privacy is something to strive for, and is considered a luxury.
Albus reiterated that I am to hold nothing back when updating. So I will not censor myself in any way. Pretty words are those. So, the first order of business, which is trivial school gossip. Here I sit as the typical diabolical criminal, rubbing hands and cackling with glee to bring you this tidbit of information care of Xiomara Hooch.
So what is the latest in the way of scandals? Sprout was actually caught shoplifting when she was a child. And what, you ask, was the ill-begotten booty? A single chocolate frog. She was four years old and already on her way down the wrong path to dark arts and debauchery. Send a note to the town crier because Sprout has come to Hogwarts. We must warn everyone in case she tries to plant inferior shrivelfigs.
I myself may never be able to trust the quality of basil that she grows. And the mandrakes! Who can tell if Sprout won't knowingly supply faulty earmuffs to our innocent trusting students? The implications are staggering. We may have deaf children! Our shrinking potions may not be as strong! We may have less than savoury fettuccine alfredo!
I always suspected she was a shifty character. It always is the quiet one that you have to watch. She can hide behind that seemingly harmless Hufflepuff facade, but I know the truth. Oh yes, I do. Thanks for the offer of hyacinth - but I think I will grow my own, thank you very much, Dark Arts demon.
I am doing my best to avoid Sirius Black. I still mentally roll my eyes in his general direction since Albus gave him the Defence Against the Dark Arts position. Black is so smug and self-assured. Granted, I suppose he has a lot of making up to do for all the time he spent hobnobbing with dementors. I imagine it is not a very worthy opponent to play a friendly game of chess with. What with its constantly trying to suck out your soul. I can see the downside of that particular friendship.
Am definitely not looking forward to today's class with Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs. However, they manage not to be so disappointing. I just have to repeat to myself that not all students can be exceptional like those in Slytherin House, excepting Crabbe and Goyle. After all, it is my job to drill these basic potions into their dull little heads.
I have never had a student fail the Potions part of their O.W.L.s and I do not intend for that to start. Even if I have to hold back Neville Longbottom and force him to attend those rare summer sessions, he will pass. If I have to teach that boy another year longer than I have to, then I shall definitely find myself driven to drink.
This is one of Albus' more creative ideas, I must say. After the disaster of last year, it is generally agreed that it could be a good idea to expand open communication between the wizarding and Muggle worlds.
Please bear in mind that this is the official spiel that we are supposed to give when questioned about it. All those literate enough to sign an X as their name are required to keep up one of these online journals. I am slightly amused that even the untouchable Malfoy family must also submit to this new law. Well, in soft-speak, "law" is such a strict and rigid term. They much prefer "suggestion" to "law". So, here I am following their "suggestion".
This is entirely on Albus' stooped shoulders. If he was not so certain that this would end the clear division among the wizarding populace - well, there is nothing for it, I suppose.
There is, however, a silver lining to the dark cloud of journaling gloom. This will log the time that you submit journal entries, so that if, years down the road, I am called into question at the Wizengamot for one thing or another, I can pull these old time stamp logs and say, "Apologies, your honour, I was too busy typing about ignorant Gryffindors to rob Gringotts."
I think that the trick to not being completely disgusted with red tape is to look for the supposed less dark side of things. You never know when you can be brought up on charges of robbing a bank or a pawn shop.
I once saw a Muggle documentary about this man who was constantly identified as a rapist. Many times over. Of course, as fate would have it, the man was innocent and the real criminal was running loose, free to commit these crimes repeatedly. Finally, said innocent man began to keep a journal. His reasoning was that if he had a journal entry at the time of the alleged sexual assault, he would establish an alibi. Consequently, this journal became a self-imposed exile.
He would journal everything from the fantastic or the mind-numbingly mundane. If he happened to be watching "television", he would document in detail the episode or movie he was viewing. If he were to go to the market, he would log what time he left his house, the mileage put on his car, and enclose a receipt in the entry, preferably time stamped.
While in the end, this did help him rebut charges of sexual assault several times, you have to wonder if he should consider himself lucky that he preserved his freedom - to write yet more journal entries. At least I can admire the man's discipline.
I suppose I am really saying that I resent having to keep an online journal. I resent having to join a "community" with my peers, students, and others. My thoughts should be my own. They should be private. However, in this day and age, privacy is something to strive for, and is considered a luxury.
Albus reiterated that I am to hold nothing back when updating. So I will not censor myself in any way. Pretty words are those. So, the first order of business, which is trivial school gossip. Here I sit as the typical diabolical criminal, rubbing hands and cackling with glee to bring you this tidbit of information care of Xiomara Hooch.
So what is the latest in the way of scandals? Sprout was actually caught shoplifting when she was a child. And what, you ask, was the ill-begotten booty? A single chocolate frog. She was four years old and already on her way down the wrong path to dark arts and debauchery. Send a note to the town crier because Sprout has come to Hogwarts. We must warn everyone in case she tries to plant inferior shrivelfigs.
I myself may never be able to trust the quality of basil that she grows. And the mandrakes! Who can tell if Sprout won't knowingly supply faulty earmuffs to our innocent trusting students? The implications are staggering. We may have deaf children! Our shrinking potions may not be as strong! We may have less than savoury fettuccine alfredo!
I always suspected she was a shifty character. It always is the quiet one that you have to watch. She can hide behind that seemingly harmless Hufflepuff facade, but I know the truth. Oh yes, I do. Thanks for the offer of hyacinth - but I think I will grow my own, thank you very much, Dark Arts demon.
I am doing my best to avoid Sirius Black. I still mentally roll my eyes in his general direction since Albus gave him the Defence Against the Dark Arts position. Black is so smug and self-assured. Granted, I suppose he has a lot of making up to do for all the time he spent hobnobbing with dementors. I imagine it is not a very worthy opponent to play a friendly game of chess with. What with its constantly trying to suck out your soul. I can see the downside of that particular friendship.
Am definitely not looking forward to today's class with Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs. However, they manage not to be so disappointing. I just have to repeat to myself that not all students can be exceptional like those in Slytherin House, excepting Crabbe and Goyle. After all, it is my job to drill these basic potions into their dull little heads.
I have never had a student fail the Potions part of their O.W.L.s and I do not intend for that to start. Even if I have to hold back Neville Longbottom and force him to attend those rare summer sessions, he will pass. If I have to teach that boy another year longer than I have to, then I shall definitely find myself driven to drink.