The Ashleigh Legacy | Gen. 1.0.
Because I (sadly and tragically) lost the Mercers (and everything else ugh) in an epic game crash, I've decided to start a new legacy. So if you enjoyed the Mercers, I hope you'll join Bo Ashleigh on her awkward and spiteful journey towards magical legacy-dom. :D
Archive | ✖ Naughty language, sexual situations/pixel nudity, and general disregard for the status quo.
Random note: I forgot to put borders around most of my screencaps before I uploaded them, but I didn't realize until I was halfway finished with this update. So just pretend that they're there and next time I will give you borders. LoL
Meet Bo Ashleigh. Bo, short for Bodb, is named for the Irish goddess of battle, and Bo has decided to battle and defeat all trashcans.
Have you ever gotten so wasted that you woke up in the middle of a field, in a town you'd never been to before, and had no idea how you got there or how to get home?
Bo: Oh my god, are you seriously starting me out homeless?
Stop whining. There's a perfectly good fire department just down the street.
Bo: Fuck my life.
Bo: Why couldn't you have dropped me in Hawaii, or something?
In Hidden Springs, even homeless bitches with clown hair get newspaper delivery.
Bo: Oh, sweet. Maybe I can roll this little kid for his paper route cash.
Kid: Don't even think about it, lady. I'm adept in kalarippayattu, muay thai, and krav maga. I live a dangerous life and I will end you.
Bo: Where the fuck did I wake up?
Cabbie: Get out while you can, that kid is a psycho! *tires screech*
And so our confused and annoyed little heroine took a stroll through downtown, trying to find someone who could tell her anything about this town. She found these winners standing around on a street corner, listening to some jackass playing guitar badly.
One of the biggest problems with playing a cowardly thief.
Bo: OH MY GOD I HATE CROWDS. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO PICK-POCKET THIS DUDE WITH EVERYONE WATCHING ME?!
(And yes, I know I could install the no-fade camera mod, but having no-fade trees annoys me more than disappearing buildings. Just think of it as ~magic~.)
And then the guitarist stopped. And everyone turned to look at the awkward girl screeching quietly to herself. And so she did the only thing she could think of doing. The slow clap and the 'I just got told I have cancer but at least I have six whole months left' smile.
Bo: Yaaaaay crappy guitar guy ohmygodstopstaringatme.
Bo: Hey, very short man-
Red-Shirt Teen: I'm, like, 15.
Bo: What? Holy shit. This place must suck the soul out of its residents. You look, like, 40. Short and 40.
Red-Shirt Teen: (Score! She thinks I look older! I totally have a shot! +)
And while Red-Shirt Teen turned to either vomit in excitement that a girl talked to him, or to crouch over and shove his hand down his pants, Bo would never know. Because she was approached by yet another prematurely-aged teenage boy. (I thought Hidden Springs was supposed to have a fountain of youth. Is that how it works? Does it suck the life from the young and feed it to the old? Idk.)
Blue-Shirt Teen: Hi. You're as beautiful as the sun, and you blind me with your radiance.
Bo: Uh-huh. Is that kid jerking off..?
We find out that blue-shirt teen's name is Dennis. Oh, and lucky Bo, he lives next door to the plot of land she woke up on. Thus, really only encouraging her to live at the fire station.
Dennis: I hope this isn't too forward, but you're so beautiful I just want to hit you in the face with a frying pan and drag you back to my cave by your lovely red hair. And there I will rut upon you with absolutely no skill or regard for your pleasure, like only teenage boys know how to do.
Bo: ...
Bo: Ew. Oh hell no.
Bo: You are a disgusting little shit and you're lucky I don't backhand you into in-coming traffic.
Dennis: WHATEVER. You don't even know what you're missing.
Bo: (What, three inches fully hard?)
Dennis: Come on! I'll even make you pancakes in the morning!
Bo: (Maybe if I fake narcolepsy he'll go away.)
And so she did. And Dennis raged, raged, and raged some more at getting shot down by an older woman. But he finally left her alone.
(And after their conversation, Dennis was already halfway into the red with her and close to Enemy status. That's my girl.)
After a few minutes of playing dead, Bo finally got back to her feet, naturally freaking out.
Bo: How fucking embarrassing. I hope no one saw that.
Everyone saw that, honey. But it's not like that's the weirdest thing about you, so get over it.
Bo then decided to go report Dennis to the police as a potential rapist, but on her way in she spied someone creeping in the side alley next to the station, back where they keep the dumpster.
And naturally having escaped one rape-like situation, one must immediately run straight into another. But it was okay this time, because this guy was cute. And of age! And that makes it alright, right ladies? ;D (Please welcome Ares Live, with blessings from the fabulous emalso/insanitysims)
Bo: Derp you're cuuuute derp.
Ares: Um, you're drooling. I find that immensely flattering.
And so Bo, because the retard that she is, started babbling to Ares about what had happened to her, not realizing that she was probably to scare this nice young man away.
Bo: And then I woke up in the middle of a field! And there was no house! No shiny, sparkling house to welcome me home!
Ares: Does your house typically sparkle..?
Bo: Speaking of sparkling houses, do you want to make babies with me so I can raise an entire generation of street urchin pick-pockets? We'll be kings of the Hidden Springs underground!
Ares: ...............um.
Ares: Are you being serious? *nervous laugh*
Bo: YEP. 8DDD
Ares: Sure, what the hell? I didn't have anything else to do today. *SPARKLEPLUS*
Bo: Eeeexxxxcellent. *SPARKLEPLUS*
Bo: (You know, he really is totally adorable. Maybe he could be useful for more than just breeding purposes...)
Ares: *is generally fucking precious*
Bo: So, if we're really going to do this maybe we should lay out a plan. I'd like to set up a franchise of tiny children who steal things like jewelry and silverware. Cops usually just let kids off with a warning. It's a great idea!
Ares: (This is awesome. I'm so glad I'm insane or it would be less awesome.)
Bo: Here, let me just give you a little more incentive to join my cause. *rubrubrub*
Ares: I'm in. I'm in. I'm in.
MEANWHILE.
These people had randomly wandered into the dumpster alley and gathered right on the other side of the picnic table. I'm pretty sure they're Hidden Springs' resident street gang, led by this papergirl. Her right-hand man is obviously Bo's paperboy, because why else would he know three of the deadliest martial arts known to man? He's obviously an enforcer.
Don Papergirl: If I hear about you screwing up one more time, Cargo Shorts, your own wife won't even be able to recognize you after I'm through with you.
Cargo Shorts: Oh my god, I'm sorry! Baby, did you hear her?
Book Wife: Don't talk to me. I'm researching gang-like and thieving things and I don't want you getting your fail on me.
But these two precious-heads were ignoring it all, lost in their own little world of conspiracy, manipulation, insanity, and reluctant love at first sight.
Ares: Oh, maaaaan, that was an awesome shoulder rub.
Bo: There's more where that came from.~
♥
Bo: Yes. Yes, you'll do quite nicely.
Ares: I think we'll do quite nicely together.
Could it be? Maybe this is more than just an evil plotting scheme?
Later that night Ares took Bo out to dinner at the classiest diner in town. So classy that half the plants and some of the people wouldn't render and remained completely black the entire time they were on the lot. It was awesome. Bo had a few drinks and let her girly side take over.
Bo: Would you like to watch the stars with me? I know it’s cheesy, but look how pretty they are. I've never seen stars like that before.
Ares: (Not nearly as pretty as you.) Yeah... I would love to.
Bo: (Okay, watching some stars. Making some moves. How does this dance go again? Oh yeah... "subtle hand movements.")
Ares: (Oh my god, she touched me. Boner check? ...Phew, not yet. Thank god.)
Closer. Scoot closer, muahaha.
Bo: Sooo, there's a star and there's a star...
Ares: (Boobies. (.Y.) I mean- ) LOOK, THERE'S THE MOON.
Bo: Uh, yeah. That's... the moon. Sure is.
So cute bbs. ♥
After they were done being all romantical, Ares finally started getting excited about the potential for a bright and illegally profitable future.
Ares: ...and our kids will wear rags and beg in the streets, but it will all be a front and they'll really be totally adept little child warriors proficient in crossbows and hand to hand combat!
Bo: (This guy plays way too much D&D.)
Ares: (Child warriors would be so awesome, but is this really the future I want for myself? Is this really a good idea? Am I in over my head?!)
Yeah. It's a good idea, Ares.
Bo's first night in the fire station had her really freaked out.
Bo: OH MY GOD, DOCTORS TERRIFY ME.
You're in a fire station, dipshit.
Bo: JUST SAYING.
Bo: HOLY SHIT, THIS FIREMAN POLE IS THE SCARIEST THING I'VE EVER SEEN.
Bo: But yet, still deceptively fun.
Stolen fireman juice is the most delicious juice. (heh heh heh fireman juice.)
A little backstory as to why Bo is homeless. Playing the Mercers basically made me despise building tiny houses and having to add on to them every time a new kid was born. So I decided with this legacy, I would start her off homeless and then give her Klepto and force her to collect gems and junk to sell in order for her to have as much money as possible, so she could have a decent house by the time kids came into the picture. Just to spare my sanity. Also, it makes for a more interesting story for me if she's a homeless thief. ;D I'm also planning on having Kleptomaniac be a family trait.
Bo spent the next day collecting space rocks and gems and junk and selling them for not very much money. While she was stealing gems off of the grounds of some abandoned warehouse, she noticed a piece of paper taped to the brick wall. "Decoys wanted. Inquire within."
Bo: Hey, I like to steal things. Maybe I should get in on this very legitimate business venture in order to get more cash!
Yeah, legitimate. Right.
And so Bo joined the criminal career in order to become a Master Thief. Her LTW is Swimming in Cash so it could work.
After securing her very legitimate job, Bo continued to search for rocks and gems, venturing high up into the hills of Hidden Springs. She ended up coming upon a hoity-toity rich people's retreat thing up there, which really had a very beautiful view from the deck.
So pretty. I don't check out landscape nearly enough.
Look who it is. Sebastian Vanderburg, the most eligible bachelor in Hidden Springs! And he's a cop, which struck me as really odd for some reason. Shouldn't he be doing drugs and screwing whores and being rich and stuff? Idk.
Bo: Oh. Oh. I smell rich guy. Oh man, that just makes him so attractive...
Sebastian: Holy shit, lady. Your hair looks like clown hair.
Bo: ...
Bo: Right. So, ignoring your douchiness, I think we should hook up and get married so I can steal all of your money to fund my franchise of thieving street urchin children. Bonus for you; you get to have sex with me.
Sebastian: Mmmmm, sex. *leerleerleer*
That face, omg.
Sebastian: yeah, I didn't pay attention to anything you said because you're poor and not that pretty. But I could have sex with you because I have a few minutes to kill.
And then this happened. IT'S LIKE THE GAME KNOWS. Rolled wishes are Bo's conscience.
Bo: Yeah, nevermind. I'm going to call some other hot, sweet guy now and you should go jump off to that deck over there and fall to your death. ♥
She made a date to meet Ares at the public pool because she keeps rolling wishes to go to the pool. I think she's a fish in a people suit.
On the way, she borrowed someone's car. Klepto/stealing faces are the cutest. Second only to chess-playing faces.
Bo wandered down the street across from the classy, non-rendered diner Ares took her to on their first date. She then stood there and stared at it and thought of sparkling partnerships and it was so cute and gross. You don't even know.
Bo: *swimswimswim* This water is really unflattering. It makes me look like a Picasso painting.
Ares finally showed up... and promptly ignored Bo and started wandering aimlessly around. Bo then decided that skinny dipping was the way to go.
Bo: Boobies attract men. This is a total fact.
Ares: I WONDER WHAT'S OUTSIDE. 8D
Oh, bb. No.
Oh. So it's reverse seduction, is it? Well played, sir.
Bo: OMG I AM SCANDALIZED. jk this is awesome but i gotta play hard to get, amirite?.
Ares: I feel so fresh and so clean clean.
Proper second date y/y?
They played a little splashy-splashy, and the fact that the entire time Ares was in the water he kept acting freaked out and making these scared little whimpering sounds, despite the fact that none of his traits imply he should be scared of the water, was just hilariously endearing.
He then got out and laid in this chair for the rest of the night. Watching Bo swim naked. Oh, I see your ploy, sir.
He looks so happy.
Ares: (Boobies. 8D Wet boobies.)
And Bo just swam around until Ares abruptly had to go and ran off. Bo, like the stalker she is, chased after him and followed him to his house.
She attempted to get invited in but he denied her, saying it was too late. Even though she was in a bikini. Wtf, Ares. Grown some testosterone. So Bo got pissed and thus began her vendetta against all trashcans.
Bo: I JUST WANT TO GET SOME ASS. IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?!
Yes, bb. Apparently it is.
And despite Ares' abrupt fleeing and Bo's trashcan battle, things seemed to have gone well. Hooray!
Randomly, this awesome glitch happens every time she goes into the fire station. Garage needs more slots.
Take a good look at this picture. This is the very first and very last day Bo will be going to work for awhile. IF YOU CATCH MY DRIFT.
After she got off work, she wandered over to the spa in order to steal shit, but there was a woman in the lot who was aaaaallllll the waaaaaaayyyyy on the other siiiiiide in the pool, yet Bo couldn't steal her car because "she was being watched." Fuuuuu.
Eventually she left, on a bicycle and not in her car wtf, so Bo got to yoink one of the really expensive cars. That, naturally, sold for like a tenth of it's price. But free money is free money.
Also randomly, I've decided that Bo needs to sleep in every single free bed at the fire department. And never make any of them. It just pleases me and idk why.
Being in the criminal; career, Bo needs to work on her athletic skill. Thankfully there's a treadmill and a strength machine at the fire station so she never needs to leave again and can become a total hermit. The Phantom of the Fire Department.
Bo: WHY IS WALKING SO HARD?!
Because the machine that makes her run was trying to kill her, Bo decided to run at her own pace. Because the sidewalk has never tried to kill her. Not yet, at least.
And look where she ended up. Because she seriously keeps rolling wishes to go swimming. I don't fucking get it.
Bo: I'll call Ares again. Because I seriously need to get me some naked, chlorine-coated booty tonight.
Ares: I'M HERE! YAY PUBLIC SEX!
Bo: WOOHOO! IN AN EXCLAMATION OF EXCITEMENT WAY, BUT YET ALSO AS AN IMPLICATION OF WHAT WE'RE ABOUT TO DO!
Bo: Hey, baby. I legit called you here to seduce you in the showers. It's time for babies. I'm aging as we speak.
Ares: Word. Let's do this. My body is ready.
*face-eating*
And yeah, I forgot about gender-specific bathrooms. Rage ensued because it's literally impossible to woohoo in public in Hidden Springs.
Ares: I'm sorry, Bo. Maybe we can just cuddle?
Bo: *aghast at the idea*
Bo: Hm. You know... I have a crazy idea...
Yeah. THIS HAPPENED. Don't judge me. I totally bought a shower, plopped it on her empty lot, sold it again after they were done, and there you go. Because babies.
After their intensely romantic evening, Bo creeped over to the hospital because there were three cars in the parking lot that were begging to be stolen; two really expensive ones and one lemon. Naturally the two expensive ones were owned by two dudes who were just randomly sitting on benches and reading. At 3:30am. So Bo tried to chase them away, but to no avail.
Bo: LEAVE SO I CAN STEAL YOUR CAR.
Hat Guy: @#(*&^%$#@#$
Bo: OMG I HATE YOU GUYS.
So eventually they left, close to dawn. Taking their cars with the, Tchhh. So she had to make due with stealing the fail lemon.
Bo: *innocently whistling despite raging inside at the loss of very expensive cars*
And then this happened. A very familiar expression to anyone who's ever played a legacy.
But you guys, I'm so excited, because this is the very first time any one of my sims has ever pissed themselves! What an exciting day!
Bo: Ew, this is stank. I hope you're happy.
I am, baby. I am.
Four down, one more to go.
She'd been asleep for less than an hour when she got a phone call alerting to of this:
AND I LAUGHED. Because:
Yeah, go for it. Take it all. And please recycle her newspapers while you're at it. HAVE FUN!
And from the looks of it, this guy is planning on having fun! Oh man, that face is even better than Sebastian's.
OH DAMN. HE TOOK EVERYTHING. ALL OF THE NOTHING THAT BO HAD. I'M SO UPSET.
Moving on.
Good morning. Good morning... sickness. 8D
Bo: (Oh god oh god I'm going to have my baby in the fire department. I'm going to be like that girl with the Wal-Mart baby.)
Eating ice cream because of baby reasons. Obviously.
Bo spent the rest of the day working out, waiting for Ares to get off of work so she could tell him the news of their impending franchise of grubby, money-hungry street urchins.
Epic work-out faces.
Yet another pretty sunset as seen from Bo's POV while working out.
Bo: I feel life stirring inside of me. I feel this power converging. I totally got this. It is time.
~*~*~Baby times!~*~*~
Bo: Fireman pole! My ancient enemy! What if you disturb the spawn that is gestating inside of me?
Bo: I will overcome my fears to make my babies stronger! MY BABIES WILL BE STRONG AND FIERCE!
Probably not.
Bo was really excited to call Ares and tell him the good news. He was, after all, the father of this evil empire she was trying to build.
Bo: Hey, babe! I have some really exciting news! Can you stop by for a few?
Ares: 'Eh, I'm not really feeling it right now. I'll call you later. *hangs up*
Bo: ....Oh. Oh. You will pay for your slight upon me, Ares Live. Oh yes. NOW I WILL MARRY YOU.
Dun dun DUUNNN! Stay tuned for the next installment of The Ashleigh Legacy! There will be babies, thievery, forced nuptials (maybe), and hopefully finally real house!
Thanks for reading, guys! ♥
Guest Sims:
Ares Live by emalso
Archive | ✖ Naughty language, sexual situations/pixel nudity, and general disregard for the status quo.
Random note: I forgot to put borders around most of my screencaps before I uploaded them, but I didn't realize until I was halfway finished with this update. So just pretend that they're there and next time I will give you borders. LoL
Meet Bo Ashleigh. Bo, short for Bodb, is named for the Irish goddess of battle, and Bo has decided to battle and defeat all trashcans.
Have you ever gotten so wasted that you woke up in the middle of a field, in a town you'd never been to before, and had no idea how you got there or how to get home?
Bo: Oh my god, are you seriously starting me out homeless?
Stop whining. There's a perfectly good fire department just down the street.
Bo: Fuck my life.
Bo: Why couldn't you have dropped me in Hawaii, or something?
In Hidden Springs, even homeless bitches with clown hair get newspaper delivery.
Bo: Oh, sweet. Maybe I can roll this little kid for his paper route cash.
Kid: Don't even think about it, lady. I'm adept in kalarippayattu, muay thai, and krav maga. I live a dangerous life and I will end you.
Bo: Where the fuck did I wake up?
Cabbie: Get out while you can, that kid is a psycho! *tires screech*
And so our confused and annoyed little heroine took a stroll through downtown, trying to find someone who could tell her anything about this town. She found these winners standing around on a street corner, listening to some jackass playing guitar badly.
One of the biggest problems with playing a cowardly thief.
Bo: OH MY GOD I HATE CROWDS. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO PICK-POCKET THIS DUDE WITH EVERYONE WATCHING ME?!
(And yes, I know I could install the no-fade camera mod, but having no-fade trees annoys me more than disappearing buildings. Just think of it as ~magic~.)
And then the guitarist stopped. And everyone turned to look at the awkward girl screeching quietly to herself. And so she did the only thing she could think of doing. The slow clap and the 'I just got told I have cancer but at least I have six whole months left' smile.
Bo: Yaaaaay crappy guitar guy ohmygodstopstaringatme.
Bo: Hey, very short man-
Red-Shirt Teen: I'm, like, 15.
Bo: What? Holy shit. This place must suck the soul out of its residents. You look, like, 40. Short and 40.
Red-Shirt Teen: (Score! She thinks I look older! I totally have a shot! +)
And while Red-Shirt Teen turned to either vomit in excitement that a girl talked to him, or to crouch over and shove his hand down his pants, Bo would never know. Because she was approached by yet another prematurely-aged teenage boy. (I thought Hidden Springs was supposed to have a fountain of youth. Is that how it works? Does it suck the life from the young and feed it to the old? Idk.)
Blue-Shirt Teen: Hi. You're as beautiful as the sun, and you blind me with your radiance.
Bo: Uh-huh. Is that kid jerking off..?
We find out that blue-shirt teen's name is Dennis. Oh, and lucky Bo, he lives next door to the plot of land she woke up on. Thus, really only encouraging her to live at the fire station.
Dennis: I hope this isn't too forward, but you're so beautiful I just want to hit you in the face with a frying pan and drag you back to my cave by your lovely red hair. And there I will rut upon you with absolutely no skill or regard for your pleasure, like only teenage boys know how to do.
Bo: ...
Bo: Ew. Oh hell no.
Bo: You are a disgusting little shit and you're lucky I don't backhand you into in-coming traffic.
Dennis: WHATEVER. You don't even know what you're missing.
Bo: (What, three inches fully hard?)
Dennis: Come on! I'll even make you pancakes in the morning!
Bo: (Maybe if I fake narcolepsy he'll go away.)
And so she did. And Dennis raged, raged, and raged some more at getting shot down by an older woman. But he finally left her alone.
(And after their conversation, Dennis was already halfway into the red with her and close to Enemy status. That's my girl.)
After a few minutes of playing dead, Bo finally got back to her feet, naturally freaking out.
Bo: How fucking embarrassing. I hope no one saw that.
Everyone saw that, honey. But it's not like that's the weirdest thing about you, so get over it.
Bo then decided to go report Dennis to the police as a potential rapist, but on her way in she spied someone creeping in the side alley next to the station, back where they keep the dumpster.
And naturally having escaped one rape-like situation, one must immediately run straight into another. But it was okay this time, because this guy was cute. And of age! And that makes it alright, right ladies? ;D (Please welcome Ares Live, with blessings from the fabulous emalso/insanitysims)
Bo: Derp you're cuuuute derp.
Ares: Um, you're drooling. I find that immensely flattering.
And so Bo, because the retard that she is, started babbling to Ares about what had happened to her, not realizing that she was probably to scare this nice young man away.
Bo: And then I woke up in the middle of a field! And there was no house! No shiny, sparkling house to welcome me home!
Ares: Does your house typically sparkle..?
Bo: Speaking of sparkling houses, do you want to make babies with me so I can raise an entire generation of street urchin pick-pockets? We'll be kings of the Hidden Springs underground!
Ares: ...............um.
Ares: Are you being serious? *nervous laugh*
Bo: YEP. 8DDD
Ares: Sure, what the hell? I didn't have anything else to do today. *SPARKLEPLUS*
Bo: Eeeexxxxcellent. *SPARKLEPLUS*
Bo: (You know, he really is totally adorable. Maybe he could be useful for more than just breeding purposes...)
Ares: *is generally fucking precious*
Bo: So, if we're really going to do this maybe we should lay out a plan. I'd like to set up a franchise of tiny children who steal things like jewelry and silverware. Cops usually just let kids off with a warning. It's a great idea!
Ares: (This is awesome. I'm so glad I'm insane or it would be less awesome.)
Bo: Here, let me just give you a little more incentive to join my cause. *rubrubrub*
Ares: I'm in. I'm in. I'm in.
MEANWHILE.
These people had randomly wandered into the dumpster alley and gathered right on the other side of the picnic table. I'm pretty sure they're Hidden Springs' resident street gang, led by this papergirl. Her right-hand man is obviously Bo's paperboy, because why else would he know three of the deadliest martial arts known to man? He's obviously an enforcer.
Don Papergirl: If I hear about you screwing up one more time, Cargo Shorts, your own wife won't even be able to recognize you after I'm through with you.
Cargo Shorts: Oh my god, I'm sorry! Baby, did you hear her?
Book Wife: Don't talk to me. I'm researching gang-like and thieving things and I don't want you getting your fail on me.
But these two precious-heads were ignoring it all, lost in their own little world of conspiracy, manipulation, insanity, and reluctant love at first sight.
Ares: Oh, maaaaan, that was an awesome shoulder rub.
Bo: There's more where that came from.~
♥
Bo: Yes. Yes, you'll do quite nicely.
Ares: I think we'll do quite nicely together.
Could it be? Maybe this is more than just an evil plotting scheme?
Later that night Ares took Bo out to dinner at the classiest diner in town. So classy that half the plants and some of the people wouldn't render and remained completely black the entire time they were on the lot. It was awesome. Bo had a few drinks and let her girly side take over.
Bo: Would you like to watch the stars with me? I know it’s cheesy, but look how pretty they are. I've never seen stars like that before.
Ares: (Not nearly as pretty as you.) Yeah... I would love to.
Bo: (Okay, watching some stars. Making some moves. How does this dance go again? Oh yeah... "subtle hand movements.")
Ares: (Oh my god, she touched me. Boner check? ...Phew, not yet. Thank god.)
Closer. Scoot closer, muahaha.
Bo: Sooo, there's a star and there's a star...
Ares: (Boobies. (.Y.) I mean- ) LOOK, THERE'S THE MOON.
Bo: Uh, yeah. That's... the moon. Sure is.
So cute bbs. ♥
After they were done being all romantical, Ares finally started getting excited about the potential for a bright and illegally profitable future.
Ares: ...and our kids will wear rags and beg in the streets, but it will all be a front and they'll really be totally adept little child warriors proficient in crossbows and hand to hand combat!
Bo: (This guy plays way too much D&D.)
Ares: (Child warriors would be so awesome, but is this really the future I want for myself? Is this really a good idea? Am I in over my head?!)
Yeah. It's a good idea, Ares.
Bo's first night in the fire station had her really freaked out.
Bo: OH MY GOD, DOCTORS TERRIFY ME.
You're in a fire station, dipshit.
Bo: JUST SAYING.
Bo: HOLY SHIT, THIS FIREMAN POLE IS THE SCARIEST THING I'VE EVER SEEN.
Bo: But yet, still deceptively fun.
Stolen fireman juice is the most delicious juice. (heh heh heh fireman juice.)
A little backstory as to why Bo is homeless. Playing the Mercers basically made me despise building tiny houses and having to add on to them every time a new kid was born. So I decided with this legacy, I would start her off homeless and then give her Klepto and force her to collect gems and junk to sell in order for her to have as much money as possible, so she could have a decent house by the time kids came into the picture. Just to spare my sanity. Also, it makes for a more interesting story for me if she's a homeless thief. ;D I'm also planning on having Kleptomaniac be a family trait.
Bo spent the next day collecting space rocks and gems and junk and selling them for not very much money. While she was stealing gems off of the grounds of some abandoned warehouse, she noticed a piece of paper taped to the brick wall. "Decoys wanted. Inquire within."
Bo: Hey, I like to steal things. Maybe I should get in on this very legitimate business venture in order to get more cash!
Yeah, legitimate. Right.
And so Bo joined the criminal career in order to become a Master Thief. Her LTW is Swimming in Cash so it could work.
After securing her very legitimate job, Bo continued to search for rocks and gems, venturing high up into the hills of Hidden Springs. She ended up coming upon a hoity-toity rich people's retreat thing up there, which really had a very beautiful view from the deck.
So pretty. I don't check out landscape nearly enough.
Look who it is. Sebastian Vanderburg, the most eligible bachelor in Hidden Springs! And he's a cop, which struck me as really odd for some reason. Shouldn't he be doing drugs and screwing whores and being rich and stuff? Idk.
Bo: Oh. Oh. I smell rich guy. Oh man, that just makes him so attractive...
Sebastian: Holy shit, lady. Your hair looks like clown hair.
Bo: ...
Bo: Right. So, ignoring your douchiness, I think we should hook up and get married so I can steal all of your money to fund my franchise of thieving street urchin children. Bonus for you; you get to have sex with me.
Sebastian: Mmmmm, sex. *leerleerleer*
That face, omg.
Sebastian: yeah, I didn't pay attention to anything you said because you're poor and not that pretty. But I could have sex with you because I have a few minutes to kill.
And then this happened. IT'S LIKE THE GAME KNOWS. Rolled wishes are Bo's conscience.
Bo: Yeah, nevermind. I'm going to call some other hot, sweet guy now and you should go jump off to that deck over there and fall to your death. ♥
She made a date to meet Ares at the public pool because she keeps rolling wishes to go to the pool. I think she's a fish in a people suit.
On the way, she borrowed someone's car. Klepto/stealing faces are the cutest. Second only to chess-playing faces.
Bo wandered down the street across from the classy, non-rendered diner Ares took her to on their first date. She then stood there and stared at it and thought of sparkling partnerships and it was so cute and gross. You don't even know.
Bo: *swimswimswim* This water is really unflattering. It makes me look like a Picasso painting.
Ares finally showed up... and promptly ignored Bo and started wandering aimlessly around. Bo then decided that skinny dipping was the way to go.
Bo: Boobies attract men. This is a total fact.
Ares: I WONDER WHAT'S OUTSIDE. 8D
Oh, bb. No.
Oh. So it's reverse seduction, is it? Well played, sir.
Bo: OMG I AM SCANDALIZED. jk this is awesome but i gotta play hard to get, amirite?.
Ares: I feel so fresh and so clean clean.
Proper second date y/y?
They played a little splashy-splashy, and the fact that the entire time Ares was in the water he kept acting freaked out and making these scared little whimpering sounds, despite the fact that none of his traits imply he should be scared of the water, was just hilariously endearing.
He then got out and laid in this chair for the rest of the night. Watching Bo swim naked. Oh, I see your ploy, sir.
He looks so happy.
Ares: (Boobies. 8D Wet boobies.)
And Bo just swam around until Ares abruptly had to go and ran off. Bo, like the stalker she is, chased after him and followed him to his house.
She attempted to get invited in but he denied her, saying it was too late. Even though she was in a bikini. Wtf, Ares. Grown some testosterone. So Bo got pissed and thus began her vendetta against all trashcans.
Bo: I JUST WANT TO GET SOME ASS. IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?!
Yes, bb. Apparently it is.
And despite Ares' abrupt fleeing and Bo's trashcan battle, things seemed to have gone well. Hooray!
Randomly, this awesome glitch happens every time she goes into the fire station. Garage needs more slots.
Take a good look at this picture. This is the very first and very last day Bo will be going to work for awhile. IF YOU CATCH MY DRIFT.
After she got off work, she wandered over to the spa in order to steal shit, but there was a woman in the lot who was aaaaallllll the waaaaaaayyyyy on the other siiiiiide in the pool, yet Bo couldn't steal her car because "she was being watched." Fuuuuu.
Eventually she left, on a bicycle and not in her car wtf, so Bo got to yoink one of the really expensive cars. That, naturally, sold for like a tenth of it's price. But free money is free money.
Also randomly, I've decided that Bo needs to sleep in every single free bed at the fire department. And never make any of them. It just pleases me and idk why.
Being in the criminal; career, Bo needs to work on her athletic skill. Thankfully there's a treadmill and a strength machine at the fire station so she never needs to leave again and can become a total hermit. The Phantom of the Fire Department.
Bo: WHY IS WALKING SO HARD?!
Because the machine that makes her run was trying to kill her, Bo decided to run at her own pace. Because the sidewalk has never tried to kill her. Not yet, at least.
And look where she ended up. Because she seriously keeps rolling wishes to go swimming. I don't fucking get it.
Bo: I'll call Ares again. Because I seriously need to get me some naked, chlorine-coated booty tonight.
Ares: I'M HERE! YAY PUBLIC SEX!
Bo: WOOHOO! IN AN EXCLAMATION OF EXCITEMENT WAY, BUT YET ALSO AS AN IMPLICATION OF WHAT WE'RE ABOUT TO DO!
Bo: Hey, baby. I legit called you here to seduce you in the showers. It's time for babies. I'm aging as we speak.
Ares: Word. Let's do this. My body is ready.
*face-eating*
And yeah, I forgot about gender-specific bathrooms. Rage ensued because it's literally impossible to woohoo in public in Hidden Springs.
Ares: I'm sorry, Bo. Maybe we can just cuddle?
Bo: *aghast at the idea*
Bo: Hm. You know... I have a crazy idea...
Yeah. THIS HAPPENED. Don't judge me. I totally bought a shower, plopped it on her empty lot, sold it again after they were done, and there you go. Because babies.
After their intensely romantic evening, Bo creeped over to the hospital because there were three cars in the parking lot that were begging to be stolen; two really expensive ones and one lemon. Naturally the two expensive ones were owned by two dudes who were just randomly sitting on benches and reading. At 3:30am. So Bo tried to chase them away, but to no avail.
Bo: LEAVE SO I CAN STEAL YOUR CAR.
Hat Guy: @#(*&^%$#@#$
Bo: OMG I HATE YOU GUYS.
So eventually they left, close to dawn. Taking their cars with the, Tchhh. So she had to make due with stealing the fail lemon.
Bo: *innocently whistling despite raging inside at the loss of very expensive cars*
And then this happened. A very familiar expression to anyone who's ever played a legacy.
But you guys, I'm so excited, because this is the very first time any one of my sims has ever pissed themselves! What an exciting day!
Bo: Ew, this is stank. I hope you're happy.
I am, baby. I am.
Four down, one more to go.
She'd been asleep for less than an hour when she got a phone call alerting to of this:
AND I LAUGHED. Because:
Yeah, go for it. Take it all. And please recycle her newspapers while you're at it. HAVE FUN!
And from the looks of it, this guy is planning on having fun! Oh man, that face is even better than Sebastian's.
OH DAMN. HE TOOK EVERYTHING. ALL OF THE NOTHING THAT BO HAD. I'M SO UPSET.
Moving on.
Good morning. Good morning... sickness. 8D
Bo: (Oh god oh god I'm going to have my baby in the fire department. I'm going to be like that girl with the Wal-Mart baby.)
Eating ice cream because of baby reasons. Obviously.
Bo spent the rest of the day working out, waiting for Ares to get off of work so she could tell him the news of their impending franchise of grubby, money-hungry street urchins.
Epic work-out faces.
Yet another pretty sunset as seen from Bo's POV while working out.
Bo: I feel life stirring inside of me. I feel this power converging. I totally got this. It is time.
~*~*~Baby times!~*~*~
Bo: Fireman pole! My ancient enemy! What if you disturb the spawn that is gestating inside of me?
Bo: I will overcome my fears to make my babies stronger! MY BABIES WILL BE STRONG AND FIERCE!
Probably not.
Bo was really excited to call Ares and tell him the good news. He was, after all, the father of this evil empire she was trying to build.
Bo: Hey, babe! I have some really exciting news! Can you stop by for a few?
Ares: 'Eh, I'm not really feeling it right now. I'll call you later. *hangs up*
Bo: ....Oh. Oh. You will pay for your slight upon me, Ares Live. Oh yes. NOW I WILL MARRY YOU.
Dun dun DUUNNN! Stay tuned for the next installment of The Ashleigh Legacy! There will be babies, thievery, forced nuptials (maybe), and hopefully finally real house!
Thanks for reading, guys! ♥
Guest Sims:
Ares Live by emalso