Comments | presencedear: Another meeting in 3 minutes...

presencedear

Another meeting in 3 minutes...

Jun 29, 2009 13:57

I think I've found the cure for my insomnia. It's called the "Project Assumption Report." It's an excel spreadsheet that's over 20,000 lines long, and I can't use "search" to find what I'm looking for. I have to scroll through and read the whole thing. I'm seriously struggling to keep my eyes open ( Read more... )

Comments 8

aphelion_orion June 29 2009, 18:39:15 UTC

zombie!Office! Maybe they were all killed by the spreadsheets. XD

You have my sympathies.

presencedear June 30 2009, 00:36:18 UTC

Hahaha... I feel like a zombie. Spreadsheets definitely do that to you.

Thanks!

nil_from_hell June 29 2009, 20:22:44 UTC

EDIT: A guy in this meeting just said, "Too many people have started working on this thing posthumously." Really? We've got dead employees working on it?!

i lol'd xD

your international weapons manufacturing is kept so secret, you don't even know about it yourself, apparently. really you have the most unique experiences, lol.

presencedear June 30 2009, 00:58:09 UTC

Actually, I wouldn't be surprised if we do something with weapons. But I'm so low level, I hardly think they need to worry about me. Frankly, they should be more concerned about these "posthumous" employees.

(I think he meant the product had been discontinued, and, suddenly, people are trying to use/sell it again.)

LOL jacesan June 29 2009, 22:03:14 UTC

Zombie weapon exporters?!?

Where do you work again?

:D

Re: LOL presencedear June 30 2009, 01:03:20 UTC

Haha, it sounds like something from a movie, doesn't it?

ami_neko June 30 2009, 02:28:35 UTC

A guy in this meeting just said, "Too many people have started working on this thing posthumously." Really? We've got dead employees working on it?!

Oh, geez. I laughed til I cried.

It wouldn't surprise me terribly to find out that IBM has some kind of process to force dead employees to rise from their graves and return to work. Maybe that explains some of the documents we get from them - they're experimenting with turning workers into zombie drones.

presencedear June 30 2009, 02:45:13 UTC

Actually, that would explain a lot of things.

I bet dead workers are a lot cheaper than live ones, too. I mean, who needs health benefits and a retirement plan when you're dead?

I'm getting the idea for a novel here. ^__^