Doors closing, doors opening

[princess_george]

A little Leslie and Ben point of view on The Smallest Park. Not beta'd - hope you enjoy.

As he’s getting up from the bench and walking away, she suddenly knows she can open a different door. One that she’d been ignoring out of the corner of her eye for days, weeks, months.

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Comments

[rikyl]

It’s just... it’s really like the door would close and she’d be in an empty hallway with nowhere to go. She can’t envision what’s next, after this conversation. Because nothing’s next. That’s the point, right?

Awww. I really like that description, and sudden appearance of door no. 2 at the crucial moment. Thank you for writing this!

[princess_george]

So how did that whole construct compare with what you think actually happened? I did some rewinding to see if I really thought that's what was going on, and I felt comfortable with it, but there are a few ways to interpret it, for sure!

[rikyl]

Yeah, I think so, it does seem like she has a sudden epiphany right there, that there is another option/door. I think it works.

[halo_221]

This was lovely! I especially feel like you hit Leslie's POV dead on! Her thoughts even sounded like her. I especially loved:
"She knows she steamrolls people. Or bulldozes them. Whatever." I can just hear her saying that.

Really well done!

[princess_george]

Thanks! I don't often think in her POV but I felt like I knew what she might have been thinking...

[beetsbearsbsg]

[princess_george]

Hee. Thanks!

[americnxidiot]

He’s getting what he asked for, and they’ve made their peace, but it’s the hollowest victory he could ever imagine.

Oh you did such a good job with both of their POVs here. They're both just so sad, and then it switches to hope so suddenly. This is just very pretty.

[princess_george]

Thanks! I really felt like Ben would feel so beaten up when he got up from that bench...

[americnxidiot]

He looked it. Poor Ben. At least he got to make out with Leslie right after that.

[sassynach]

How do I feel?

I feel like I never want to see you look so scared again.

I feel like kissing you is the most important thing I can possibly do.

I feel like doing this forever.

Ugh. So perfectly Ben.

Also, I like this: As he gets up from the bench, he feels exhausted, aching. He’s getting what he asked for, and they’ve made their peace, but it’s the hollowest victory he could ever imagine.
I wasn't about to put it into words, but "hollow" is absolute right. :(

[princess_george]

Thanks for the comment! And, yeah, hollow.

[sassynach]

Oops, I meant "I wasn't ABLE to put it into words..." Apparently I can't type and think at the same time either. ;)

[princess_george]

Eh, I knew what you meant!