gradual | daejae
title: gradual
rating: pg
word count: 528
warnings: none
summary: daehyun falls out of love; youngjae is clueless
he don’t know how it happened. it’s a mystery really, falling out of love. daehyun sits on the couch across from youngjae and looks at him. just looks at him.
he doesn’t get that feeling in his stomach anymore. he doesn’t feel like smiling until his face starts to hurt. he just doesn’t feel anything (except maybe a friendly little warmth). he wonders if youngjae noticed. noticed the way he’s becoming more and more distant.
they touch less (daehyun touches him less). he’s crawling back into his shell. he doesn’t want to be here anymore (he doesn’t want to be with youngjae anymore).
denial has come and gone. he’s tired now; he doesn’t want to lie to himself anymore. his love for youngjae--it’s gone. vanished into thin air. it isn’t sudden, no. it’s more of a gradual thing. one day, he wakes up and doesn’t want to smile at youngjae’s sleeping face or stroke his cheek.
the next, he stops caring. he just stops. when they fight, daehyun gives up and goes to their room. he doesn’t fight anymore. and he wonders why.
for weeks and weeks, he’s tried to delude himself. i’m just tired. it happens to every couple. i still love youngjae, really, i do.
(but he knows he doesn’t)
youngjae looks up from his book and smiles at daehyun. the older boy forces a smile and youngjae goes on reading, oblivious to the turmoil going through his boyfriend’s mind.
it takes daehyun another week to finally decide to break it off with youngjae. he picks a sunny day and takes youngjae out.
“what’s the special occasion?” youngjae asks, grinning from ear to ear.
(because daehyun rarely ever takes him out anymore)
daehyun shrugs, trying to smile, trying to act casual. he hopes youngjae doesn’t see his grimace of a smile. the younger boy skips ahead of him, laughing.
“so you’re not gonna tell me?”
they approach a bench. daehyun catches up to youngjae, pulls him aside (onto the bench), and looks him straight in the eye. daehyun sighs, he’s ready to do this. to end this. he’s tired and he just wants it to end.
“i...i want to break up.”
for moment, youngjae is stunned into silence. he only fully registers daehyun’s words moments later. break up?
“br-break up? why? d-did i do something wrong? wh-what happened? was it me?”
tears begin forming in youngjae’s eyes. daehyun pats his shoulders, trying to calm him.
“no...it was nothing you did. i...i just don’t feel the same way about you anymore. i’m sorry.”
youngjae clutches daehyun’s shirt. tears are now pouring down his face. “why? why don’t you love me anymore? why? why is it you? why do you get to do this to me? why do you get to hurt me? why do you get everything? you still have my love and i have nothing!”
“i’m sorry,” daehyun says.
(his last words to youngjae)
he gets up and walks away (he turns back to look at youngjae one last time).
daehyun’s gone.
youngjae remains still. clouds begin rolling in and he feels water on his head. huh, looks like the weatherman was wrong.
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rating: pg
word count: 528
warnings: none
summary: daehyun falls out of love; youngjae is clueless
he don’t know how it happened. it’s a mystery really, falling out of love. daehyun sits on the couch across from youngjae and looks at him. just looks at him.
he doesn’t get that feeling in his stomach anymore. he doesn’t feel like smiling until his face starts to hurt. he just doesn’t feel anything (except maybe a friendly little warmth). he wonders if youngjae noticed. noticed the way he’s becoming more and more distant.
they touch less (daehyun touches him less). he’s crawling back into his shell. he doesn’t want to be here anymore (he doesn’t want to be with youngjae anymore).
denial has come and gone. he’s tired now; he doesn’t want to lie to himself anymore. his love for youngjae--it’s gone. vanished into thin air. it isn’t sudden, no. it’s more of a gradual thing. one day, he wakes up and doesn’t want to smile at youngjae’s sleeping face or stroke his cheek.
the next, he stops caring. he just stops. when they fight, daehyun gives up and goes to their room. he doesn’t fight anymore. and he wonders why.
for weeks and weeks, he’s tried to delude himself. i’m just tired. it happens to every couple. i still love youngjae, really, i do.
(but he knows he doesn’t)
youngjae looks up from his book and smiles at daehyun. the older boy forces a smile and youngjae goes on reading, oblivious to the turmoil going through his boyfriend’s mind.
it takes daehyun another week to finally decide to break it off with youngjae. he picks a sunny day and takes youngjae out.
“what’s the special occasion?” youngjae asks, grinning from ear to ear.
(because daehyun rarely ever takes him out anymore)
daehyun shrugs, trying to smile, trying to act casual. he hopes youngjae doesn’t see his grimace of a smile. the younger boy skips ahead of him, laughing.
“so you’re not gonna tell me?”
they approach a bench. daehyun catches up to youngjae, pulls him aside (onto the bench), and looks him straight in the eye. daehyun sighs, he’s ready to do this. to end this. he’s tired and he just wants it to end.
“i...i want to break up.”
for moment, youngjae is stunned into silence. he only fully registers daehyun’s words moments later. break up?
“br-break up? why? d-did i do something wrong? wh-what happened? was it me?”
tears begin forming in youngjae’s eyes. daehyun pats his shoulders, trying to calm him.
“no...it was nothing you did. i...i just don’t feel the same way about you anymore. i’m sorry.”
youngjae clutches daehyun’s shirt. tears are now pouring down his face. “why? why don’t you love me anymore? why? why is it you? why do you get to do this to me? why do you get to hurt me? why do you get everything? you still have my love and i have nothing!”
“i’m sorry,” daehyun says.
(his last words to youngjae)
he gets up and walks away (he turns back to look at youngjae one last time).
daehyun’s gone.
youngjae remains still. clouds begin rolling in and he feels water on his head. huh, looks like the weatherman was wrong.
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