Pretend You Love Me 4
He almost feared his house more now than he ever had. Things were holding on by a small, minuscule thread and he was afraid that one day he’d walk in and it would all come crashing down. At least when they didn’t speak, they knew where they stood with one another, but now, they had no idea. Every move he made he felt like he was walking on eggshells. Of course, he was happy that things were slowly getting better, but there was so much they had to discus. They avoided it at all costs because neither of them wanted to ruin the tentative peace they found with each other.
How would they raise a child while their relationship was barely holding on? How could he be a good father when he was so close to being unfaithful to his wife? How could he raise a child when he couldn’t even fix his relationship with the one person he loved more than life itself?
“Everything ok?” A soft voice came from behind him. He didn’t bother turning around and out of the corner of his eye, he saw her take a seat on the stool next to him and order a soda.
“What do you want, Andie?” He asked, not even looking at her.
“I saw you from across the bar, I’m just making sure you aren’t going to drown yourself,” she said, her voice was a little hurt. A twinge of guilt went through him.
“I’m sorry. I’m just not in a good place,” he said, the alcohol taking over.
“I take it things with Elena aren’t going very well,” she said, realizing that’s why he was in the bar in the first place.
“She’s pregnant,” he sighed defeatedly.
“Wow, that’s huge,” she said, not sure if she should be excited or concerned.
“We can’t even fix our relationship, how are we supposed to raise a child?” He asked in a broken voice, then his voice dropped to a whisper, “I don’t even know if I want the baby.”
She felt so awful for the torn man in front of her, but there was nothing she could do to help him. All she wanted was to take away his pain, she just wanted to make him feel her love for him.
“You don’t mean that,” she said finally.
“Yeah, I do,” he said softly, “I’m so fucked up. I can’t even enjoy the pseudo-peace we’ve established because I’m just waiting for it all to come to blows.”
“You don’t trust her anymore,” Andie deduced.
“No, I don’t,” he chuckled humorlessly.
“Ever think that maybe it’s time to throw in the towel?” She asked quietly, “Maybe move on with someone that you do trust and that loves you completely?”
Silence settled on the pair while the implications of her words set in. Her suggestion finally hit him.
“What?” He asked as he turned to face her, confusion filling his eyes. Which she mistook for something else.
“She doesn’t deserve you, Damon,” she said softly, placing her hand high on his leg, “You deserve someone who won’t push you away, who will love you completely.”
“You’re telling me I should leave my wife?” He asked incredulously, to which she nodded. He took her hand in his and pulled her face close to his, she would’ve been pleased if not for the deadly fire in his eyes, “Let me make this clear, when I ended things, I meant it. I love my wife. How dare you try to take advantage of our issues!” He hissed at her. “I never loved you and I never will. I made a mistake. You were a mistake.”
Her eyes filled with tears as she opened her mouth to respond, but another shrill voice interrupted her.
“DAMON SALVATORE,” the voice bellowed across the bar. He still held Andie’s wrist as his head swiveled in the direction of the voice. He knew who it was without looking. The tiny blonde stood a few feet behind them with her hands on her hips and a look that could turn stone into ash.
“Get your filthy claws off of him,” she hissed, her death glare directed on the woman next to him. He released her wrist, not realizing he still had it trapped in his steel grip. Once she saw the woman move a good distance away from him, she turned her gaze on him. He could almost feel his bones rattle with the amount of venom in her stare.
“Do you have any idea what time it is?” She cried in an outrage, eyeing his empty glass on the bar behind him. He was still too afraid to speak for fear she’d cut his tongue off or something equally as extreme. That woman’s wrath could level most of North America. He wasn’t sure how his brother managed to marry her and stay married to her.
“I’ve tried to call you about a hundred times. And to top it off, I just received a panicked call from your wife asking if you had caught on fire because you won’t answer her calls,” Caroline spat at him like a circus performer would spit fire. At the mention of Elena, he remembered why he was at the bar in the first place.
A string of curses left his mouth as he jumped up to gather his things. It was supposed to be one drink to calm his nerves before he met her at the doctor’s office.
“I’m not sure why you’re in such a rush. You already missed the appointment,” Caroline said as she crossed her arms over her chest and not missing an opportunity to shoot Andie one last death glare before she got the hint to leave them be.
“Caroline,” Damon said, trying to calm her down.
“You have so much explaining to do,” Caroline narrowed her eyes at him, “Like why you missed hearing your baby’s heartbeat for the first time because you were drowning yourself in alcohol with the woman who almost ripped apart your marriage?”
“Andie didn’t ruin our marriage, Caroline,” Damon hissed, “You know damn well that wasn’t it.”
“Don’t you start that with me, Damon,” she warned, “I know as much as you do as to why she became so detached, but she’s obviously trying to fix things, Damon. That’s more than I can say for you right now.”
With that, she shot him one more deadly look before she turned on her designer heel and stormed out the way she came.
---BREAK---
“Mrs. Salvatore, are you ready?” She’d been staring at her phone for the past ten minutes and dialed his number countless times.
“Just a little longer?” Elena asked the physician’s assistant with sad eyes, “He might have gotten caught up with an emergency at work.” The assistant thought it over for a minute before nodding and disappearing back behind the door she came through.
Elena stared at her phone praying that it would ring. Her mind kept flashing to images of Damon stuck in a burning building saving a small child, him pushing someone out of a building before himself as it collapsed on top of him. She knew the dangers of being a firefighter’s wife. And as proud as it made her that he saved innocent people, she still worried endlessly about him putting someone’s life over his and paying the ultimate price. So days like these, when she couldn’t get ahold of him freaked her out. Especially because she knew he wouldn’t miss this for the world. For as hard as things have been the past eight months, he was making an effort. A real effort and so was she.
So she dialed the only person who could tell her for sure if Damon was alright, or even alive. And if she didn’t know, she would find out. She pressed send and held the phone to her ear. She drummed nervously on her leg until she heard her pick up.
“Hello?”
“Caroline?” She asked, her voice shaking slightly.
“What’s wrong, Elena?” Caroline’s voice immediately taking on a worried tone.
“It’s Damon,” she started, but had to stop when her voice cracked.
“What happened?” Caroline asked.
“He’s supposed to be at my appointment to hear the baby’s heartbeat, but I can’t get ahold of him. What if something happened to him at work?” Elena said, her words coming out quickly as her anxiety took over.
“Elena, calm down. Take a deep breath. I’ll find him,” Caroline said and with that, she hung up.
“Elena?” She looked up to see Dr. Fell standing in the doorway that led to the examination rooms, “We can’t wait any longer.” Her eyes were apologetic and Elena nodded before following her back through the maze of hallways and exam rooms.
“Anything changed since we last met?” Dr. Fell started as they entered the small room and she shut the door behind them.
“No, nothing, just a lot of morning sickness,” Elena said as she sat on the exam table and let her eyes dart around the room before they fell to her hands in her lap.
“Elena,” Dr. Fell said as she placed her hand over Elena’s, “You need to relax. Damon’s fine. You worry too much.”
Elena nodded and laid back against the table and lifted her shirt. Dr. Fell got out the doppler machine. She moved the small end of the machine around her stomach and soon the room filled with a small sound, almost like the sound of a galloping horse. Immediately, Elena’s eyes filled with tears and all her anxiety from the day faded in that moment. Her baby was real. There was a living human inside of her. Her heart swelled at the sound. She’d always thought that there was nothing she could love more than Damon. That small heartbeat disproved all of that and in turn, only made her love for Damon grow.
She was floating as she left the doctor’s office. The shrill tone of her phone jolted her down from her high when she saw it was Caroline calling.
“Did you find him?” She asked as soon as she answered.
“How was the appointment?” Caroline asked instead of answering.
“You’re deflecting, Caroline,” Elena scolded before adding, “It was so amazing. Hearing the heartbeat just made it real.”
“I’m so excited for you!” Caroline squealed into the phone.
“Now, where did you find him?” Elena asked. She knew since Caroline was deflecting, he obviously hadn’t caught on fire or got trapped under the rubble of a collapsed building.
“I don’t want to tell you,” Caroline said quietly, her voice much less cheerful than it had been.
“Caroline,” Elena warned.
“I found him at the Grill,” she finally admitted.
“At the Grill?” Elena repeated.
“At the bar more specifically,” Caroline trailed off.
“What are you not telling me?” Elena asked carefully.
“He wasn’t alone,” Caroline said sadly.
“Out with it, Caroline. Who was he with?” Elena asked, getting impatient.
“He was with Andie,” Caroline admitted sadly. Whatever happiness had been floating inside Elena was immediately sucked out of her at that moment.
“What?” She whispered. Her heart that felt so full only minutes before, felt like it was breaking.
“I’m so sorry, Lena. But I read him the riot act and I doubt she’ll be hanging around him anymore after I finished with her,” Caroline tried to comfort her.
“Thanks, Care,” Elena mumbled, still dazed at her revelation.
“Do you need me to come over? Bring you anything?” Caroline asked with concern coloring her tone.
“No, thanks though. I’ll talk to you later,” Elena said before hanging up. By the time she placed her phone back in her purse, she was pulling into her driveway. She said a silent thanks that Damon wasn’t home.
She walked into the house and straight to her room without a second look at anything. She closed the door and immediately dropped to the ground and let the tears fall.
---BREAK---
He walked up to his door and took a deep breath. He saw Elena’s car in the driveway and knew things would not be happy. Nothing in life could prepare him for what he was about to walk into. He took one more breath before pushing the door open. The house was eerily quiet.
He slowly crept further into the still house. He stood still for a moment, trying to hear where in the house she was. He searched the ground floor and found no signs of her. He climbed the stair slowly and froze when he walked by their room and heard her quiet sobs from the other side of the door.
Then what he did to her came rushing back. He made such a grand gesture, telling her that he wanted to be at the appointment. She was so excited, he could see it in the way her eyes lit up when he suggested it. And then he missed it. Not only because he was at the bar in the middle of the day, but because he was with Andie. He pictured her in the waiting room panicking because she was imagining all the horrible things that could’ve happened to him to make him miss it. She was probably imagining him laying in the hospital with 3rd degree burns everywhere or trapped in a burning building.
“Elena?” He said quietly through the door. He knew she heard him because her cries stopped and there was complete silence.
“Go away!” She yelled at him.
“Can you just open the door?” He asked, trying the knob, but finding it locked. He heard her fumbling around in the room before the door was ripped open and he was hit with the fire in her gaze. If Caroline could level North America, Elena’s gaze in that moment could level the entire European continent.
“Please, just let me explain,” he said quietly.
“No need, Caroline already beat you to it,” she seethed.
“Elena, I’m so sorry. She just showed up there, I swear,” he said, his heart hurt for her when he saw the hurt in her eyes behind all that fury.
“Save it, Damon,” she cried, “Do you have any idea how worried I was about you? I was picturing every possible scenario that could’ve kept you from our baby’s appointment. It never crossed my mind that you would ditch me for her, after everything. I needed you, Damon.” Her hand dropped to her stomach before her eyes flew up to his they were broken and devastated, “We needed you.”
The desperation in her voice threatened to take him to his knees. He messed up. He possibly just destroyed everything he ever wanted in life.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. He had nothing to say to make her see how sorry he really was.
“Me too,” she said sadly as she stepped backward into the room and shut the door in his face.
He turned and pressed his back against the closed door and sunk to the ground. Tears rolled down his cheeks as he listened to her soft cries from the other side of the door.