Let's Play The Ur-Quan Masters
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Chapter 6: Loose Ends
Part 2: How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love The Bomb
February 10, 2156
Now that we've fixed the Ultron, it's time to head for the Utwig homeworld and give it back.
ZELNICK
Hey guys, guess what we've got! We've got THE ULTRON! Wanna see it?
UTWIG
Gaaah! Should I set my gaze upon such a signt I might suffer sleepless nights for years on end! It is a symbol of the collective Utwig failure. It is our ultimate tragedy! AAAHHH!! Every divot, every crack on its surface is etched forever in my soul! Remove it fro my sight lest I purge my... hey!
That is not the devastated Ultron... it is the image of the Ultron BEFORE!... a trick? A TRICK?! Oooh! I had no idea that any species could sink so low! How dare you try to manipulate me with that cheap stage prop?!... why it's not even... Hey, wait a second, it looks like... CAN IT BE? ...YES, IT IS! ...A MIRACLE!! OH HAPPY DAY!! JOYOUS OCCASION!!
You have our eternal thanks, good Captain! You will be immportalized as the blessed figure that delivered unto us our future! We will reverse your very likeness!
Let me take the Ultron... yes, I feel the link... the knowledge, and... the Power. Hmm, it seems that there is much to do. Indeed, it seems that you should proceed to the second moon of the sixth planet of Zeta Hyades and take what you find there; we no longer have need for it... but the Ultron reveals that YOU will!
I think you for your part in the grand scheme. We now recover that which is ours via destiny, and proceed to perform our essential service for the universe. BUT WAIT!!
The Ultron throbs and whistles! Matters of significance are being relayed to our brains. It has been so long since we communicated with the ultimate in such a manner... but slowly, the truth is revealed... our destiny!! We have been directed to join with our Supox allies and attack... YOU!
....no wait, that's wrong. Sorry. We attack... YOUR ENEMIES... the Ur-Quan and the Kohr-Ah! ...no, that's not quite right either... what? Oh, okay. We must strike ONLY the black ships... only the Kohr-Ah!
Now, Captain, we must leave to prepare our battle fleets. Wish us luck!
Wow, what a monologue! Now to follow instructions, for once.
As directed, here we are at Zeta Hyades VI. Let's check out the second moon!
Oh, hell no.
ZELNICK
Druuge starship captain. Justify your presence here.
DRUUGE
We, the appointed representatives of the Crimson Corporation, merely come to obtain the fair and reasonable payment for our goods! We traveled to this region of space years ago to sell the useless Ultron device to the Utwig. We knew even then of the weapon on the surface below us -- this was to be our price!
But the Utwig used a clever ploy to cheat us! I had convinced the morose Utwig fools that the Ultron was the answer to all of their pitiful dreams. 'Powers?', the Proctors whined. 'Will it give us the powers we crave?' I assured them that, yes, the Ultron would give them the Second Sight... the Ultron would allow them to see into the past and the future... the Ultron would slowly imbue each of them with unique secret powers of great significance... the Ultron would ensure that their race's huge potential for greatness would be fulfilled. Then... then a mistake was made.
Enough foolishness! We will take the Precursor device from the surface and then leave. Thereafter, I may see fit to bequeath the entire planet to you, Captain, for your invaluable services in the past... provided you leave now!
ZELNICK
This Precursor artifact does not belong to you. It is rightfully ours. Stand aside.
DRUUGE
LIAR! It is WE who are the genuine owners! Not you, Captain. Those many years ago, when we offered the Ultron to the Utwig, how they capered and laughed at their good fortune... Fools!
Then they begged to hold the device, just for a moment. To close the deal, I permitted this, a grievous mistake! The moment the High Proctor touched the Ultron, her body arched, and her eyes rolled back in her head. She begain to babble meaningless phrases and howl like a beast. We had expected the Utwig to fall for our Sell, to buy the useless device. But never with such gusto! Their self-doubt and lack of clear reason left them vulnerable to our every manipulation.
But then, the Proctor's body relaxed, and her eyes slowly closed. When they re-opened, her visual orbs shone with a wild and frightening light. 'This is all we could have dreamed of... and more!', she intoned. 'And now, Druuge, as to your price...'
I opened my mouth to speak, but before I could utter a word, the Proctor interrupted, 'Wait! The Ultron feeds your thoughts directly to me. Do not speak! I know what you desire.'
What could I say? That the Ultron was a farce and could do no such thing? I was stunned, and fell silent. The Proctor continued. 'You Druuge of the Crimson Corporation desire an object of great antiquity! Something of secret function and value. Very well! It shall be done.' And with that we were led to a small vault. The Proctor ceremoniously opened the door of the vault, and explained that because we had been of such great service, ALL of the treasures within were now ours!
Inside we found a hodge-podge of ancient and useless artifacts... a glowing rod, an absurd trident, and more such junk. I could see no way to salvage the disastrous situation at that time. But when I heard of you, your travels, and your foolish quest for freedom, I realized that you could be the agent of our justice... and lo! It is so. You have heard our justification. It is valid and unassailable. Now GO! And do not return.
ZELNICK
Regardless of your feelings in this matter, we will now take the device.
DRUUGE
No! You will not! We know your soul, young Captain. It is no brighter than ours! We acknowledge our greed. We revel in it! You are the dishonest one! Hiding your shame in shadows, you fabricate justifications, rationales! In the end, we are just the same.
But now you stand in our way. You will not be moved. Therefore, we will add your true name to our Ledger of Hatred, but first: Die, child, DIE!
Two new ships in play here! The Druuge Mauler is a curious ship. It has very slow speeds, but its primary weapon is a cannon with enormous recoil, allowing it to reach great speeds backwards. Its energy recovers very slowly, but it can throw crew members into the furnace to recover huge amounts of power.
The ZoqFot Stinger is a fast, light attack vessel. Its primary weapon is a medium range machine gun of weak power, and its secondary is an immensely powerful plasma tongue attack that is only effective at absolute point-blank range. In this screenshot, I've just nailed the Druuge ship with it.
My ZoqFot fleet takes out two of the five Maulers, leaving another three to deal with. Since I'm trying to keep Fwiffo alive, I'll deal with them myself.
Yeah, that's right.
Bitch.
Druuge fleet obliterated, it's time to get what we came here for.
...script, and although we can't translate all of the writing, it is pretty clear that it is a warning, repeated again and again.
The energy output of this artifact is scary -- it rivals all our ships' engines at redline! If I may be so bold, Captain, I would advise that we do not experiment with this device until we are back at the starbase.
We shall now return to the ship, with the black cylinder device carefully stowed in the cargo area.
---- END OF REPORT ----
So here's my giant bomb. The best part? I can activate it any time I want. Wanna see what happens?
So yeah. Want to avoid that. Fortunately, I saved just prior to doing that.
NEXT TIME: The most evil being in the galaxy.
<< | ^^ | >>
Chapter 6: Loose Ends
Part 2: How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love The Bomb
February 10, 2156
Now that we've fixed the Ultron, it's time to head for the Utwig homeworld and give it back.
ZELNICK
Hey guys, guess what we've got! We've got THE ULTRON! Wanna see it?
UTWIG
Gaaah! Should I set my gaze upon such a signt I might suffer sleepless nights for years on end! It is a symbol of the collective Utwig failure. It is our ultimate tragedy! AAAHHH!! Every divot, every crack on its surface is etched forever in my soul! Remove it fro my sight lest I purge my... hey!
That is not the devastated Ultron... it is the image of the Ultron BEFORE!... a trick? A TRICK?! Oooh! I had no idea that any species could sink so low! How dare you try to manipulate me with that cheap stage prop?!... why it's not even... Hey, wait a second, it looks like... CAN IT BE? ...YES, IT IS! ...A MIRACLE!! OH HAPPY DAY!! JOYOUS OCCASION!!
You have our eternal thanks, good Captain! You will be immportalized as the blessed figure that delivered unto us our future! We will reverse your very likeness!
Let me take the Ultron... yes, I feel the link... the knowledge, and... the Power. Hmm, it seems that there is much to do. Indeed, it seems that you should proceed to the second moon of the sixth planet of Zeta Hyades and take what you find there; we no longer have need for it... but the Ultron reveals that YOU will!
I think you for your part in the grand scheme. We now recover that which is ours via destiny, and proceed to perform our essential service for the universe. BUT WAIT!!
The Ultron throbs and whistles! Matters of significance are being relayed to our brains. It has been so long since we communicated with the ultimate in such a manner... but slowly, the truth is revealed... our destiny!! We have been directed to join with our Supox allies and attack... YOU!
....no wait, that's wrong. Sorry. We attack... YOUR ENEMIES... the Ur-Quan and the Kohr-Ah! ...no, that's not quite right either... what? Oh, okay. We must strike ONLY the black ships... only the Kohr-Ah!
Now, Captain, we must leave to prepare our battle fleets. Wish us luck!
Wow, what a monologue! Now to follow instructions, for once.
As directed, here we are at Zeta Hyades VI. Let's check out the second moon!
Oh, hell no.
ZELNICK
Druuge starship captain. Justify your presence here.
DRUUGE
We, the appointed representatives of the Crimson Corporation, merely come to obtain the fair and reasonable payment for our goods! We traveled to this region of space years ago to sell the useless Ultron device to the Utwig. We knew even then of the weapon on the surface below us -- this was to be our price!
But the Utwig used a clever ploy to cheat us! I had convinced the morose Utwig fools that the Ultron was the answer to all of their pitiful dreams. 'Powers?', the Proctors whined. 'Will it give us the powers we crave?' I assured them that, yes, the Ultron would give them the Second Sight... the Ultron would allow them to see into the past and the future... the Ultron would slowly imbue each of them with unique secret powers of great significance... the Ultron would ensure that their race's huge potential for greatness would be fulfilled. Then... then a mistake was made.
Enough foolishness! We will take the Precursor device from the surface and then leave. Thereafter, I may see fit to bequeath the entire planet to you, Captain, for your invaluable services in the past... provided you leave now!
ZELNICK
This Precursor artifact does not belong to you. It is rightfully ours. Stand aside.
DRUUGE
LIAR! It is WE who are the genuine owners! Not you, Captain. Those many years ago, when we offered the Ultron to the Utwig, how they capered and laughed at their good fortune... Fools!
Then they begged to hold the device, just for a moment. To close the deal, I permitted this, a grievous mistake! The moment the High Proctor touched the Ultron, her body arched, and her eyes rolled back in her head. She begain to babble meaningless phrases and howl like a beast. We had expected the Utwig to fall for our Sell, to buy the useless device. But never with such gusto! Their self-doubt and lack of clear reason left them vulnerable to our every manipulation.
But then, the Proctor's body relaxed, and her eyes slowly closed. When they re-opened, her visual orbs shone with a wild and frightening light. 'This is all we could have dreamed of... and more!', she intoned. 'And now, Druuge, as to your price...'
I opened my mouth to speak, but before I could utter a word, the Proctor interrupted, 'Wait! The Ultron feeds your thoughts directly to me. Do not speak! I know what you desire.'
What could I say? That the Ultron was a farce and could do no such thing? I was stunned, and fell silent. The Proctor continued. 'You Druuge of the Crimson Corporation desire an object of great antiquity! Something of secret function and value. Very well! It shall be done.' And with that we were led to a small vault. The Proctor ceremoniously opened the door of the vault, and explained that because we had been of such great service, ALL of the treasures within were now ours!
Inside we found a hodge-podge of ancient and useless artifacts... a glowing rod, an absurd trident, and more such junk. I could see no way to salvage the disastrous situation at that time. But when I heard of you, your travels, and your foolish quest for freedom, I realized that you could be the agent of our justice... and lo! It is so. You have heard our justification. It is valid and unassailable. Now GO! And do not return.
ZELNICK
Regardless of your feelings in this matter, we will now take the device.
DRUUGE
No! You will not! We know your soul, young Captain. It is no brighter than ours! We acknowledge our greed. We revel in it! You are the dishonest one! Hiding your shame in shadows, you fabricate justifications, rationales! In the end, we are just the same.
But now you stand in our way. You will not be moved. Therefore, we will add your true name to our Ledger of Hatred, but first: Die, child, DIE!
Two new ships in play here! The Druuge Mauler is a curious ship. It has very slow speeds, but its primary weapon is a cannon with enormous recoil, allowing it to reach great speeds backwards. Its energy recovers very slowly, but it can throw crew members into the furnace to recover huge amounts of power.
The ZoqFot Stinger is a fast, light attack vessel. Its primary weapon is a medium range machine gun of weak power, and its secondary is an immensely powerful plasma tongue attack that is only effective at absolute point-blank range. In this screenshot, I've just nailed the Druuge ship with it.
My ZoqFot fleet takes out two of the five Maulers, leaving another three to deal with. Since I'm trying to keep Fwiffo alive, I'll deal with them myself.
Yeah, that's right.
Bitch.
Druuge fleet obliterated, it's time to get what we came here for.
...script, and although we can't translate all of the writing, it is pretty clear that it is a warning, repeated again and again.
The energy output of this artifact is scary -- it rivals all our ships' engines at redline! If I may be so bold, Captain, I would advise that we do not experiment with this device until we are back at the starbase.
We shall now return to the ship, with the black cylinder device carefully stowed in the cargo area.
---- END OF REPORT ----
So here's my giant bomb. The best part? I can activate it any time I want. Wanna see what happens?
So yeah. Want to avoid that. Fortunately, I saved just prior to doing that.
NEXT TIME: The most evil being in the galaxy.
<< | ^^ | >>