Well, This Time I'm Not Going To Watch Myself Die.
So, this weekend has been pretty different. A weekend of tears and of unwanted realization...Or so that is how I personally see it. For right now, I have no desire to go too deeply into what exactly I am speaking of. However, you may look to Jamie's journal to get more backround information on the topic
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a pin point
-As we discussed, I think you are right in that what we uncovered is indeed a 'pinpoint,' or a focus of all the things that have been agitating you lately and contributing to the feeling of dissatisfaction lurking in the back of your mind.
I have lost freinds for reasons that I never saw as my fault in the past, but I now am unsure of.
-I don't think you can directly allign what has been bothering you with the reason those people left. What is bothering you is the excess; the reason they left seems to be the general change, and the existence of that action itself. I have to note, also, that they didn't seem to take any time to compromise, really have a heart to heart talk with you about it, or anything. So yeah...my point is, I'm not sure if the issue now and the issue then are exactly the same thing.
I have cried about not being able to be social and brave, but I have contributed to it with this.-I ( ... )
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If we can manage to achieve these goals, I believe the two of us will be some of the happiest we have been in a long time.
-I wasn't exactly sure how to interpret this. Surely, this problem has built up for a while, but even during the middle stages of it, I never thought of myself as 'unhappy.' I guess I didn't realize that it made you so unhappy with everything as a whole? I don't know..
By saying this I wasn't implying (sp?) that either of us were unhappy. I was saying simply that we may be happier over all. A person doesn't nessecerialy (god I can't spell) have to be unhappy just to be happier....Get it?
Don't worry, hun, this year (and more) has been absolutely great for me. I have not spent very much of it at all being unhappy, I hope you know that.
<3s
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